Making Up for Mistakes
by AlAtt
Summary: Jude and Tommy finally went on their date, and then he left.  Now he's back over a year later and wants things to get back to normal.  I know, it's been done before, but this is my take on it...New updates coming soon!
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

For nearly two years she had been hoping and wishing that this would happen. Jude had known for a long time the she was in love with Tom Quincy. He was the perfect match for her, and she knew that he was it for her. She wasn't sure what would happen when he asked her out earlier that day, but now that he was sitting across from her at their favorite restaurant, she knew it was the start of something great.

Things had been perfect all night long. They talked about anything and everything, simply loving being together. Though Jude knew how long it had taken them to get to this point, their date felt like the most normal thing in the world. Unfortunately, their night had to come to an end. They stood from their table, and Jude was thrilled when Tommy grabbed her hand in his. He didn't let go all the way out to the Viper, only giving it up when he shut her door.

Conversation continued the whole ride back to G Major to pick up her car, and Jude couldn't contain her giddiness.

"What has you smiling like a fool?" Tommy asked her.

Not sure how much she should say, Jude simply responded, "Tonight was just a really good night." She ventured a look in his direction, trying to see the effects of her comment. The smile that came across his face was encouraging, and she continued, saying, "Thank you for making it so perfect."

From his place in the driver's seat, Tommy grabbed her hand and gave it a light squeeze. "You know I would do anything for you. Tonight was pretty great, huh?"

Jude could only nod her agreement as they continued their drive. He didn't let go of her hand, hanging onto it the whole rest of the drive. Their conversation continued, talking about music, the studio, the growing relationship between her sister and Kwest, and anything else that came to mind. Pulling up next to her car, Tom cut the engine and simply sat there. Jude could tell that he wanted to say something, but he was obviously nervous. "What is it, Tommy?"

He opened his mouth and shut it again, clearly contemplating what words to use. A second later, he opened his mouth again, ready to confess whatever was on his mind. "Jude, I had a really wonderful time tonight. I know that you are still seventeen, but I don't want that to be the reason that we don't do this again." He wouldn't look at her as he spoke, only staring out at the parking lot that was before them. "I know that I shouldn't want to be with you, but I just can't help it." Finally looking at her, he finished his thoughts, "I can't seem to stay away, and the more time that passes, the less I want to try. If we decide to do this, do you think we can keep it between us...just until you turn eighteen...maybe take things slow to start with?"

She felt like she was on top of the world. Tom Quincy, the love of her life, just confessed that he wanted to be with her, regardless of her age or their positions as producer and artist. If the giant grin on her face wasn't evidence enough of her opinion, the "YES!" that escaped her lips made her feelings clear.

At her comment, Tom pulled her to him and captured her lips with his own. The kiss was sweet and sincere. Tommy didn't push things too far and released her much too quickly. He cupped her cheek with the palm of his hand and just looked at her. Their eyes were locked on each other, and nothing else mattered in that moment. Finally pulling back, he asked, "Will you call me when you get home?"

His question didn't surprise her. Now that she drove her '65 Mustang to the studio a few days a week he would ask her that when she left. She had always attributed it to a friendly concern, but maybe it had always been a bit more. "Sure." Putting her hand on the door, Jude asked him, "I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Yeah," was his simple reply.

Deciding to be daring, Jude leaned over and gave him a quick kiss as if to say goodnight. He returned her simple peck, molding their lips together for a brief moment. "Bye."

With that, Jude got out of the Viper and into her own car. She gave him a quick wave before heading out of the parking lot and in the direction of home. She couldn't stop the smile that lit her face—she was completely content with how they left things. She was okay that they were taking things slow...she was okay that they were the only ones who would know for a while. As long as Tommy was hers, not much else mattered. She quickly made the last couple of turns and pulled into her driveway. In only minutes she was changed and laying down in her bed, ready to fall into a sleep full of sweet dreams. Remembering Tommy's request, Jude grabbed her phone and sent him a quick text letting him know that she was safe and sound. _Tucked in and ready to sleep...thank you for such a perfect night:)_

…

_Tucked in and ready to sleep...thank you for such a perfect night:)_ If only she knew how much a simple text message could affect him! As soon as he received her message, the image of her in bed assaulted his mind. He couldn't get the picture out of his head and was becoming tortured with the memory of their evening. All he wanted was to get to sleep—the sooner that happened, the sooner he would wake up, and the sooner he would see Jude.

He couldn't believe how much this one girl had changed him. Only once before had he even come close to these feelings. And, to be honest, what he felt for Jude was ten times stronger than any feeling he had for Angie. With Jude he could see a future—a life, a family. Never had he though that he was going to be a "family man," but Jude made him want that. Trying to find a comfortable position in his lonely bed, Tom twisted and turned for the next twenty minutes. Finally getting fed up, he got up and went over to his massive stereo. If he couldn't sleep, at least he could listen to his girl. The music of her just-completed second album filled the room.

Eyes closed and breathing slowed, Tom was just about asleep when the shrill ringing of his phone startled him completely awake. Grabbing the irritating device, he answered with a harsh, "Hello?"

"Tom, I need you to do something for me."

The sound of his boss came across the line, bringing Tommy to a more conscious state. If Darius was calling him this late, something had to be wrong. "Right now?" he asked, trying to determine what his boss might need at nearly midnight.

"Of course right now. Do you think I would be calling this late if it wasn't urgent? I need you to get Maya for me. Kim started drinking again, and I am finally filing for full custody."

Tom knew that Kim was Darius' ex-wife, and Maya was their daughter. Though they didn't work out, Darius and Kim still somewhat got along. However, he also knew that Kim had a bit of a drinking problem. She had been sober for a couple of years, but apparently that didn't last. Tom focused his attention back on what his boss was saying.

"I can't leave Toronto right now, so I need you to go to Montana and get her. Start packing."

"How much should I be packing—are we talking a weekend or a full week?" Tommy went to the closet in the hall and grabbed his small suitcase, bringing it back to his room.

"Tom, its going to take a bit longer than that. You can't bring Maya back to Toronto until the custody papers are finalized, and that takes at least six months. They won't release her to you until they see you are a fit guardian, so you'll need more than a couple changes of clothes. You have a flight in five hours—the first one out of the day."

Tommy was shocked. How dare Darius take him away from Toronto...from Jude! "What about Jude, Dar? I'm her producer! And what about my other artists?" It was the only argument he could think of to get out of going.

"Tom, you and I both know that Jude's album is done. She will be re-assigned to Kwest, as will the rest of your artists. There are no other options, Tom. You will go or you will suffer the consequences."

As much as he wanted to disagree and tell Darius that he didn't care, Tommy knew how powerful and vindictive the older man was. He would get his way eventually, no matter how many people went down.  
>Fine. I'll be at the airport as soon as I get a bag packed."<p>

"I'm glad we agree. Call me when you land."

Tom sighed, knowing there was no other option. "Fine. I'll talk to you later, D." As he was about to hang up, he heard Darius's voice once again.

"Tom?"

"Yeah?"

"Don't tell anyone about this."

"What?" If Darius was going to send him away, the only way he would be able to make it that long was if he could talk to Jude. How would he be able to last six months without hearing her voice or her laugh...her sarcasm?

"You know how sensitive these things can be, Tom. Kwest knows because he is taking over for you, but that's it. No talking to anyone...especially Jude. As great as that girl is, she wouldn't handle things well if she knew; besides, she would want to go with you...don't think I don't know its true. I know that you guys have some connection, but I won't have it. I won't have you hurting her or messing her up, and I need all of your focus on Maya...no distractions. You hear me?"

Arguing would be fruitless and only serve to anger the man. Resigned to his fate, Tom agreed, "Fine, Dar. I'll get packed up and call when I get there."

"You may not believe me, but I'm doing what is best for everyone."

Hanging up the phone, Tom didn't agree with his boss' parting words. Darius only ever did what was best for himself—the feelings and well-being of others rarely mattered. Turning up the sound of Jude's voice that was still coming through the speakers surrounding his room, Tommy began to pack. He pulled out an additional suitcase, knowing that he would need as many things as possible to last six months.

A couple of hours later he was ready to head out. His bags were packed and he was showered, ready to go. As he looked around his room, Tommy grabbed the picture of him and Jude that rested next to his bed and put it in the suitcase. Her music was on his iPod, and another picture was in his wallet. As he got in the car that was to take him to the airport, Tom looked back at his building and wondered how the hell he would be able to last six months without her. They only had one date, and he was being ripped away from her. His only hope as that she would understand what happened—that her feelings wouldn't change. When he came back, she would be eighteen, and no one would be able to stop them—Darius included. With that, he turned around and resigned himself to his new role as Maya's caretaker.

…

Jude strolled into the studio almost ten minutes ahead of when she was scheduled to record. After such a perfect night, she couldn't wait to see Tommy again. Of course, she understood that they would have to be professional in the studio—purely producer and artist. But the knowledge that they were more would be enough to get her through.

Setting her bag and guitar in Studio A, Jude quickly turned to grab some coffee before recording. Though she didn't think much of it, it was strange that Tommy wasn't in the studio yet. Usually he got there much earlier than she did to take care of some of the other responsibilities he had as the head producer. Mid-stream of pouring coffee, Darius' booming voice came across the studio. "Jude!"

Startled, she almost dropped the coffee pot, but recovered well. Turning to face him, she asked, "Yes, Darius?"

"Come here. I need to talk to you."

Rolling her eyes, Jude only responded, "Be right there, D." Grabbing her full mug of coffee, Jude made her way to Darius' office. Along the way she made sure to say hi to Kwest, who gave her a strange look—one full of sympathy and pity. _That's odd_, she thought. Opening the door to her boss' office, she brushed off the confusion and walked in to the lion's den. "What's up, D?"

"Well, Jude. First, I want to congratulate you are your newest album. I think it's really going to be a hit—I'm talking top of the charts!"

"Thanks, Darius. That means a lot coming from you." And it did mean a lot. Darius had a lot of experience in the music industry, and if he thought her record would be a hit, she was encouraged that it was good music. But, she knew that there had to be more. "While I appreciate the complement, Darius, I know there has to be something else. What is it?"

"You know me well, Jude. I just wanted to let you know that we are going to change things up a bit for your next album. I'm putting Kwest on your album...full time...without Tom."

"What?" Jude yelled. Darius was taking Tommy away from her album? "What about my music?"

"Jude, you don't need Tom to make good music. Besides, it would be hard for Tom to produce your next record when he isn't around, huh?"

"What?" This time her voice carried beyond his office, causing those in the lobby to turn in their direction. Immediately overcome by confusion, Jude had no care for anyone at that moment other than the man who held the answers. Slowly and deliberately, she asked, "What do you mean he isn't around?" She was now standing in front of him, her hands on his desk, eyes searching his for some insight into where the love of her life might be.

"T had some business to attend to. He won't be back for a while. Its probably best if you just get to work with Kwest, Jude."

His tone gave no room for further questions, so Jude tried to regain her composure. Closing her eyes, she took a few deep breaths to calm herself. Opening them again, she stood and walked out his door and straight into Studio A where Kwest was now waiting for her. Throwing herself into the spare chair, Jude put her head in her hands.

"I take it D told you that Tom is gone for a while, huh?"

A nod was her only response for a moment, still lost in her questions and confusion. Finally looking up at him, her eyes betrayed her sense of loss, tears present and ready to fall.

Taking something off of the soundboard, Kwest handed her an envelope. "He left this on my desk before leaving, if it helps. I didn't read it, but maybe it will give you some answers."

Jude held the envelope in her hands, looking at it incredulously.

A quiet, "I'm gonna grab some coffee. Be back in a few," were Kwest's parting words.

Once the studio door closed, Jude didn't make a move for a few more minutes. As much as she wanted answers, she wasn't sure if she wanted to open the note. It was obviously for her, her name scrawled across the front in Tommy's uniquely precise handwriting. Staring at the envelope a few more minutes, Jude decided that answers were what she needed. She ripped open the paper and tossed it aside, holding onto the small note.

_Jude, I have some business to take care of outside of the country. I won't be able to talk, so it isn't even worth calling. Not sure when or if I'll be back, but keep working hard. I know your next album will be even more amazing than this one. Know that last night was one of the best I've ever had. Thank you...for believing in me always. Tommy_

She was shocked. That was all he would say? Taking care of business was the only explanation he would give? Where was he? Would they be able to talk?

Kwest must have been watching through the door, because a moment after she set the note down, he walked in the room. "Anything helpful?"

She looked up at him before shrugging. "No...nothing..."

"Really?" Surprise was obvious in his voice.

Jude figured he had to know something and turned to face him, catching his eyes with her own.

"Don't even try asking, Jude. I can't say anything." The hopeless sigh that left her lips prompted a further response. "Honestly, I don't really know anything. I don't know what business he has or where he is, just that he's safe."

"He's okay?" she asked. As much as she was furious with the whole situation, her concern for Tommy's safety was foremost. When Kwest affirmed that he was, indeed, safe, she jumped out of her chair. "That ass! Why the hell couldn't he tell me more? Do I really matter that little to just get a confusing note telling me he won't be around? I don't deserve a phone call or a message? Am I that easy to leave behind?" Tears began to fall as soon as she knew Tommy was okay, and now that they started, they wouldn't stop.

Clearly unsure of how to handle the situation, Kwest stood awkwardly by the door. When Jude's tears turned into heaving sobs, he walked over and put his arms around her.

Amidst the myriad of emotions raging in her, Jude appreciated Kwest's actions. He was like a brother to her, and the fact that he was trying to comfort her was extremely sweet. They sat like that for nearly thirty minutes, eventually separating when her tears seemed to run out. Her thanks was obvious as Jude looked up at him, but just to make sure he knew, she said, "Thank you, Kwest."

"Any time, Super Star." Patting her on the back, he asked, "Do you want to get back to work?"

Knowing that music was about the only thing that might help her feel better, Jude agreed. "Let's play around a bit."

With that, they got started. Jude played her guitar for the rest of the afternoon, suggestions by Kwest interspersed along the way. Though they didn't get anything official accomplished, it did help her to process everything that was going on. Jude put on a brave face and went home that night. She psyched herself up for the next day, and fell into a restless sleep, dreams of Tommy filling her subconscious.

…

To this day, dreams of Tommy plagued her, causing her to lose sleep most nights in a vain attempt to not think of him. It didn't matter that it had been just over eighteen months...a year and a half. She still thought of him every day. Since then so many things had changed, Jude felt like a whole different person. To friends and family, she was a shadow of herself—physically and emotionally.

The first six months might have been the hardest for her. Every day she would call him and leave a message on his phone. Not once did she get a call back or even a text message. Every day she would ask Kwest for information, and every day he would tell her the same thing—he hadn't heard from Tom. After the first week, she knew he was lying. She had overheard him on the phone talking to a "T," and really, who else would it have been?

In that time, she had only recorded two songs, and they were crap—plain and simple. She couldn't seem to write, at least not well, and her music was suffering. Each day she would hope and pray that he would come home, and each day she was disappointed. When Tommy didn't show up on her eighteenth birthday, something inside her broke, and she decided that it was time to move on. However, it was hard to move on when nearly every thought you had related back to the man you loved who disappeared.

Realizing that something needed to change, Jude marched into Darius' office the day after her birthday, demanding that her contract be canceled. Their discussion took nearly three hours, but in the end, her boss gave in. He allowed her to cancel her contract. His only stipulation was that he had the first rights to her music should she decide to record anything in the future. Darius also retained his role as her manager, though she would simply be marked as an "inactive" client for the time being.

With nothing holding her back, Jude decided that it was time for her to "find herself." She packed a bag and left on an adventure of self-discovery. Her first stop was Costabella, Spain, where she spent two weeks learning flamenco guitar from one of the many masters. From there, she headed to Paris, by way of the Bordeaux region, tasting wine and pastries along the way. While the journey was interesting, it was lonely, and Jude was more than happy to get back to life in Toronto. Upon arriving home, Kwest proposed to her sister and, though thrilled that Sadie and her producer had found each other, Jude was again struck with loneliness. As her luck would have it, the week she returned from her vacation, Karma and Spied got married in a botched publicity attempt. They agreed to give marriage a try, and were a surprisingly good, if not a little strange, match. While she had been gone, Spiederman Mind Explosion was offered a solo album, which they gladly accepted, provided that they could have her help from time to time.

The many changes left Jude feeling lost and out of place, especially now that she had no job. She resolved to return to what made her happiest—music. She had no intention of going back to G Major, instead wanting to help other musicians trying to get a break. She purchased the abandoned building where her rehearsal space was located, and set about transforming it into a musician's haven. The apartments were made into other rehearsal spaces, and the top floor, which had been her own rehearsal space, was renovated into her personal studio and loft. Jude moved in as soon as construction was completed, and had been there ever since.

Every one of the twenty rehearsal spaces was filled, and there was a list of at least twenty different musicians waiting for a spot. In addition to renting out the rehearsal rooms, Jude began to take on different bands and singers who she would mentor and help develop their passion and talent for making great music. She helped them perfect their writing and music and produced demo tracks that were sent out to clubs, music halls, and record labels. In the year since opening her musical compound, two of the bands she was working with were signed by G Major.

Thankfully, Jude's relationship with Darius was still on good terms, and she would be by the studio at least once a week. Between helping SME write and record their debut album and lending her talents to other signed artists, she was a familiar face at G Major, much to the delight of everyone. It seemed as though she had not a moment to rest and relax, but the vibrancy she had before was gone. Jude was going through the motions of life, doing and saying all of the right things, but without the passion and joy. She was numb.

The profits from renting out rehearsal spaces allowed her to live without getting another job. All money she made from writing royalties went straight into a savings account for any "what if" situations that may come up. She was frugal in all purchases, never spending money on frivolously extravagant things. Although she enjoyed working with bands and up-and-coming artists, she knew something was missing.

A month prior to her nineteenth birthday saw the wedding of Kwest and Sadie. Jude was, not surprisingly, the maid of honor. Thankfully, Stuart was able to make it back for wedding festivities. His job had transferred him to Montreal when Jude was gone on her trip of "self-discovery," and he rarely got to see his daughters. Kwest and Sadie purchased the Harrison house from him as soon as he found out about the job, and decided to stay there when it was discovered that they were pregnant.

Looking back, life had certainly changed over the past year-and-a-half. Today, Jude turned nineteen, though it wasn't something she was really excited about or looking forward to. What good is a birthday and another year when you had no one to share it with?

Mentally shoving the memories and thoughts aside, Jude took one last look in the mirror before heading downstairs. In the main part of her loft were various members of her friends and family, close to twenty-five in all. They had all gathered to celebrate her birthday in typical musician fashion—lots of music and lots of food. Right now, the members of Waking Blind, a band Jude was working with to get a record deal, were playing in her living room.

Spied, Wally, and Kyle were stuffing their faces in her kitchen, with Karma looking on in amusement. Kwest and Sadie were engrossed in conversation with Stuart and Darius about music trends, and different musicians that Jude had been helping to produce and mentor were scattered around. As Waking Blind finished another set, Jude made sure to remind everyone to check out their premier performance at the Vinyl Palace the following night.

She made her way to each of the different groups, catching up and laughing with each of them. She put on a smiling face and enjoyed herself to an extent, but quickly tired of the many people surrounding her. Quietly, she retraced her steps to her room and sat on her bed. Sitting against her headboard, she pulled out her guitar and began to strum quietly. There was no rhyme or reason to her music, only different chords and melodies as she looked around her room at the pictures of her and Tommy from when he was still around. Whereas she could usually put on a brave face and pretend that all was fine, all defenses were down in this moment. Tears streamed down her face as she cried for what could have been and lost love. Words poured out and she continued to play.

She didn't notice one of her best friends standing at the door until he cleared his throat. Startled, she looked up, eyes red from crying. "Hey Spied."

"Hey, Harrison. Got tired of the party?"

She loved that he knew when to be brutally honest and when to just gloss over what was going on, like now. "Yeah. Just got a little overwhelmed by the people. How I ever did those PR events, I'll never know."

He smiled and stepped further into her room. She set her guitar on the floor and patted the place on the bed next to her and he sat down. Looking at her, Spied's brow quirked knowingly, and he asked, "So, want to tell me what's really going on?"

She sighed and looked next to her. "Honestly?" At Spied's nod, she confessed. "I miss him. It's been a year-and-a-half, and I still miss him. No phone call, no message, not even an email, and he is the first thing that comes to mind when I wake up, and my last thought before falling asleep. I feel lost and alone." More tears began to make their way down her cheeks as she let on to the hurt and pain she had been trying to ignore for so long.

A few minutes later, Jude got a hold of her emotions and took a deep and cleansing breath. Looking back at him, she asked, "So, how was the party?"

He made no comment as to her change of topic, and answered, "It was good. Everyone was leaving as I came up. Sadie and Karma were picking up some of the garbage."

Realizing that her guests were cleaning up, Jude moved to get up and help. Spied's arm held her back, though, forcing her to stay in place. "Jude, it was the least they could do. They know that today isn't the easiest for you."

Resigned to her place on the bed, she smiled a tired smile. "I'll have to thank them later."

After a brief pause, Spied turned to her. "Hey, the band sounds great, by the way."

A glimpse of a true smile lit her face. "They do, huh? We've been working really hard lately for their premier...but I think they might actually pull it off. I'm totally stoked for their Vinyl Palace performance. Darius told me that he would make sure someone was down there to sign them if they're ready."

"Dude, that's awesome!"

She could see his excitement and was truly grateful in that moment. Just then, Sadie and Karma poked their heads in the room. "Sis, we're gonna head out."

"Yeah, thanks for everything tonight, Jude." Karma and Jude had developed some sort of friendship over recent months, which overjoyed Spied to no end. She turned to her husband and told him, "Sweets, I'm going to head home. Why don't you stay here tonight and I'll pick you up on the way to the studio tomorrow?"

"That sounds great, babe. I'll see you in the morning."

The two girls turned to leave, and Jude called out her thanks just before she heard the door shut. Turning back to Spied, she gave him a hug and told him "Thanks...for being such a perfect best friend. Sometimes I'm not sure what I would do without you."

"You know I'm always here for you, Dude. What do you say we work on that song?"

Grabbing her guitar, Spied got off the bed and led the way down to the studio. They worked for hours, making sure the sound and the lyrics were perfect. Finally satisfied, they recorded the song, Jude completely consumed by the emotions she was singing about. She felt every hint of pain, every tear she cried as an ache in her heart. Hurt tore through her every bone, and a sense of loss colored each note she sang.

_Sometimes the hole  
>You left hurts my heart<br>So bad it cuts through  
>The deepest parts of me<br>And fills up my mouth  
>With words that I cry<br>How I'm still trying  
>To stay inside<em>

_Hearts break  
>And hearts wait<br>To make us  
>Grow from dust<br>Then our eyes cry  
>And souls sigh<br>So that we know  
>That it hurts<br>Our hearts break  
>And hearts wait<br>To make us  
>Grow from dust<br>Then our eyes cry  
>And souls sigh<br>So that we know  
>That it hurts<em>

_Every now and then  
>My memories ache<br>With the empty ideas  
>Of the ones we'd made<br>But as time goes on  
>And my age gets older<br>I love the ones I know  
>They're enough<br>To picture the rain_

_Cause heart break  
>And hearts wait<br>To make us  
>Grow from dust<br>Then our eyes cry  
>And souls sigh<br>So that we know  
>That it hurts<br>Our hearts break  
>And hearts wait<br>To make us  
>Grow from dust<br>Then our eyes cry  
>And souls sigh<br>So that we know  
>That it hurts<em>

_You know  
>When to make me<br>I might  
>Just your heal<em>_1_

"Perfect take, Dude." He opened the sound booth door for her and asked, "Wanna hit the sack?"

"Sure. And thanks for all your help. This is the first time I feel like I had anything worth recording, and I don't think I could have done it without you."

"Anytime, Jude. Anytime."

The pair went back up to her room and threw themselves on her bed. They continued to talk despite the Kurt Cobain documentary that was playing in the background. Jude admitted to the love she still held for Tommy. She told her best friend about her first date with her soulmate, and how heartbroken she was when he left, especially considering the way he left. She even let Spied in on the fact that Kwest and Darius both still talked to Tommy, and wouldn't tell her a single thing. Jude let him in on her biggest fear: that she was just another girl in a long line of Little Tommy Q admirers.

Despite his thoughts to the contrary, Spied was quiet—something Jude was glad about. She didn't want people trying to solve her feelings or cheer her up, she just needed someone to listen...someone to try and understand how deeply she was hurt, and how broken she was.

Sleep caught up with the best friends eventually, and the following morning found them joking around as usual. Not a word was mentioned of the previous night. Both understood how much Jude had needed to unload. She closed the door behind Spied after Karma picked him up, ready to put on her "happy face" and prepare for the day ahead. Using her many obligations as a distraction, she set about getting herself and her loft cleaned up. There were things that needed to be done in order to prepare for Waking Blind's performance at the Vinyl Palace that night, and it was her job to make sure everything was ready to go. With that in mind, she left the loft and got into her Mustang, prepared as ever for the day ahead.

1The song is _Now and Then_ by Adele.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

It was amazing that nothing seemed to change in the eighteen months he had been away. He had arrived early that morning, Maya in tow, beyond ready to get back to his life in Toronto. More than anything, he wanted to get back to Jude. Not a single day went by that he wasn't consumed with thoughts of her. The only thing that kept him from flying back to Toronto was the little girl he was in charge of.

She needed to get away from her alcoholic mom, and if he was the only way that could happen, then so be it. He couldn't believe that it had taken a year longer than Darius expected, but complications arose when Kim refused to go into rehab and then disappeared for a few months. During that time, all legal proceedings and paperwork were halted, having to be started over once the woman was found.

Finally, though, he was home. After dropping Maya off at G Major that morning, Darius had given Tommy a few weeks off, but Tommy didn't want to waste a moment of time. He needed to get back to work...back to Jude. After assuring Darius that he really did want to get into the swing of things, he was given the task of checking out a new band that night at the Vinyl Palace. Apparently they were highly recommended and, if they were as good as Darius had been told, he had a contract waiting for them to sign.

As soon as he received his orders, Tom went straight to Studio A. He knew that Jude would be furious with him, but he had to see her. Surprised that she wasn't in the sound booth, Tommy decided to go in anyway, wanting to see Kwest. "Hey man, long time no see."

His best friend turned around, a look of pure shock covering his face. "Tom?" he asked incredulously.

"Hey, Kwest. How are you?"

Before Kwest could answer, Karma strutted in to the room. Through his conversations with his friend, Tom knew who she was. He had to say, she seemed to know how to play the game, even if she didn't have the best voice. He was surprised, however, when she knew who he was.

"Well, well, well...If it isn't Tom Quincy in the flesh. What the hell are you doing here?"

"Karma, take five more minutes, okay?" Kwest interrupted before Tommy could answer her?

The girl rolled her eyes before walking out of the studio. Tommy let out a breath he had begun holding as soon as Karma entered Studio A. "Thanks. I didn't really want to get into it with her."

Kwest raised his eyebrows at his friend. "I didn't do it for you, I did it because I have a few things that need to be said. First, I don't care what Darius said, you should have talked to Jude."

Tommy was about to respond, but Kwest wouldn't let a single word escape his lips.

"That note you left her was shit, Tom. Second, she knows that you were still in touch with me and D, so don't expect her to be real open to listening to you." Standing up, Kwest moved over to where Tom was standing. "Now, how are you?"

Not quite knowing where to start, he gave his best friend a solid man-hug, pulling away after a few moments. "That's a lot to take in, and to be honest, I'm not really sure where to start. I know I should have talked to Jude...I regret not doing so from the start. But once I got there, I knew that if I heard her voice, I would want to come back, or beg her to go to Montana. I knew that couldn't happen. It doesn't surprise me that she knew I would keep in touch with you, and I know I'll get even more push-back from her for it. But I had to make sure she was doing okay." Tommy took a deep breath and closed his eyes. "As for how I am? I'm miserable. Never in my life have I missed someone so much...never in my life have I had someone I cared enough about to miss so much."

Tom looked up and could see Kwest's nodding head. As much as he knew the man across from him was his best friend—someone he considered to be family, he also knew that Kwest considered Jude family. He knew that his best friend had married her sister, but their bond was stronger than just their legal connection.

"Kwest, you have to know that I love her." And it was true. Though he may not have told her so on their first date, he did love her. Since that day he had taken her to the pier all those years ago, he knew there was something different about her—something special. At some point, he realized that those feelings were ones of love, and no one could question the truth of them.

"I know you do, Tom. But you have to know how much she was hurting. Hell, how much she still hurts."

"All I want to do is make it up to her!" Tom yelled in his frustration. He knew it would take a lot, but no matter how long the road was, it would be worth it in the end if he had her back in his life. Setting aside the Jude dilemma for a moment, Tommy wanted to know how his friend was doing. "Catch me up on what's going on in your life."

"Well, I know I told you that Sadie and I got married last month, but I may not have mentioned that we are pregnant. Sadie is due in about five months."

The smile on his best friend's face was contagious, and Tommy congratulated him with another hug. "That's awesome, man! Obviously you're excited..."

"Yeah...yeah. I mean, at first it was a total shock. But, as soon as we really thought about it, we realized that it was pretty awesome. I mean, I'm gonna be a dad!"

Again, the smile on Kwest's face was catching, and Tommy couldn't hide his own excitement. While he had never pictured himself as a father, he couldn't deny that the idea had appeal. To be so responsible for another little life would be amazing. Completely terrifying, but amazing. He could just imagine a beautiful little angel with blonde hair and Jude's beautiful blue eyes. Of course, their daughter would have a love of music, something they could share as a family.

Before he realized it, Tommy was picturing life with Jude—living together, raising their kids, and forever making music. An ache consumed his heart as he understood how unlikely that dream was at the moment. Ignoring the pain for the time being, he continued to listen as Kwest described how they were making Jude's old room into the nursery and what color they were painting the walls.

Around the time when Kwest began to draw and example of the owl mural they wanted painted, Tommy suggested they grab some lunch—his treat. Conversation continued through the whole meal, and eventually they made their way back to the studio. Tommy knew that he should get back to his apartment and unpack his things before hitting the Vinyl Palace later that night. He told Kwest as much, but, before he could leave, Tommy couldn't help one last question. "By the way...where is Jude? I would have figured she would be working on her album. It's got to be close to being done, right?"

The look in his friend's eyes caused a sense of unease to settle in his gut. "Kwest, what is it?"

"Uh, I didn't mention it before, but Jude doesn't work for the studio anymore. Darius let her cancel her contract about a year ago."

For a brief moment, Tom forgot to breathe. "She quit?"

"Not really..."

At the obvious confusion covering his face, Kwest continued. "She gave up her contract, but she didn't quit music. She rents out rehearsal spaces in her building and works with bands to help get them ready for performances. She also helps really talented bands put together demo tracks for labels, and she hasn't stopped writing completely. She co-wrote most of the songs on SME's album and usually contributes songs for a few other artists as well."

Speechless, Tom just sat in his seat for a few moments. Sure, Kwest said she didn't really quit music, but it wasn't the same…she was born to make amazing music. More than anything, though, he wanted to know why she would quit. He asked Kwest, "Why would she give up her contract, though? Her second album was amazing and topped the charts...I know for a fact that she had notebooks full of songs ready to work on for her next album. What happened?"

There was a pause in the conversation and Kwest clearly contemplated how much he should tell. Much to Tommy's relief, he answered. "She felt...alone. No one was really there for her anymore and she was kind of lost. Once she got back from her trip, she decided that if she couldn't find inspiration, maybe she could help inspire others."

Kwest's explanation was so utterly Jude. He should have known that it was all about the music—even if her music wasn't working well, she would make sure others' music was being heard. Despite his thankfulness that Jude hadn't completely given up on music, he realized that it was largely his fault that his girl felt so lost and alone.

Lost in his thoughts, Tommy stood and turned towards the door, ready to get home. He waved goodbye to Kwest and headed out, still pondering all that he had learned. He couldn't believe that Jude would have given up her contract. He had set it before: she was the real deal. He had to find a way to get her back in the studio—making her own music. More, he had to make things right with her. As much as he was just following Darius' orders, he should have done things differently. He should have at least given her more information and kept in contact.

At this point, all he could do was move forward. Of course, he would probably be apologizing for the next year, but he would also be working to make things right...working towards a possible future with Jude. First, he had to get home and showered. He wouldn't mind unpacking a bit too.

…

Later that night, Tom walked into the Vinyl Palace, assaulted with the memories that overcame him. He recalled being there with Jude for her first performance. She was nervous, but she did so well. If she did nothing but perform her music for the rest of her life, the world would be a better place. Shaking those thoughts off, he focused his attention to the task at hand. He was here to check out a new band that Darius thought might be worth signing. Referencing the note he made on the palm of his hand, he made a mental note to remember..._Waking Blind_. Tommy grabbed a seat at a nearby table and ordered himself a beer. The band was set to start in about ten minutes, but given the way things usually worked, it would be at least a half hour before they would see the stage. Looking around the club, he caught a glimpse of some of the stage hands and sound techs. Remembering again what it was like when he got to be backstage, a smile formed on Tom's face. He couldn't wait to get back to days like that.

Coming out of his reverie, Tom took a sip of his Dos Equis. Looking up from the bottle, he saw a flash of blonde hair and was shocked at the familiar loss of breath that had only ever happened with Jude. Only she was ever able to make him pause...only she made him to think about anyone other than himself. But why would some blonde gal cause his heart to stop like that? Was it possible that Jude was here tonight? Had Kwest told him the name of the band she was working with now? Unable to recall what the band had been called, Tom looked back to the stage as if it could offer some insight. He was surprised when three guys and a girl started to fill the stage. Not five minutes later, the lights dimmed and the music started.

A full ninety minutes later, the band did their final encore and began to head back stage. Before they could completely disappear, Tom jumped out of his seat and went over to the stage. Handing the drummer his G Major business card, Tom told the man that he would be at a booth towards the back. They musician nodded and asked if they could bring their pseudo-manager to the meeting. Not seeing a problem with it, Tommy agreed.

Back at his booth, Tom took a seat and grabbed some information out of his back pocket. Assuming that they were good enough to sign, Darius had blocked off time in his schedule for them to go to the studio and sign paperwork the following day. Tom's job tonight was to check them out and ensure that they were good enough to be considered G Major artists. Not surprisingly they were pretty amazing, and his role now was to encourage the to sign with G Major, and not some other label.

Seeing the four band-mates come his direction, Tommy waved them over. Before he could even speak, one of the members put his hand up. "We're waiting for our girl to get here. She was just finishing things up backstage."

Our girl? What is that supposed to mean? Responding with a simple "No problem," Tommy then asked the group if they wanted some drinks. The band was fine with the waters he already had brought over, so there was a brief moment of awkward silence before Tommy launched into some small talk and introductions. The bass player and only girl was Riley. She was engaged to Jack, the lead guitarist. Nate was the drummer who Tom had spoken to earlier, and Chuck was everything else. While he usually played secondary guitar and helped on vocals, he also pulled out the violin for some songs, could rock a fiddle, and was a genius on the piano—or so Riley said.

A few minutes later and introductions complete, Chuck waved his hand to someone. He assumed it was the girl they had been talking about, and waited patiently as he assumed she was coming over. What Tom did not assume, was that the girl they had been talking about was the very girl that had occupied his thoughts for years, and the girl he had only dreamed of seeing for the past eighteen months. "Jude?" he asked, completely shocked and at a loss for more words.

She didn't say anything for a few moments, only looked at him with those beautiful, big blue eyes. He could see them change color as she processed what was happening, quickly going from a vibrant and light blue to a stormy gray, full of anger. "Tom..." she finally said, slow and deliberate as if she wasn't sure he was really there.

He could only nod like a fool, not wanting to say anything to upset her or make her run away.

There was another brief pause before something about her changed. Tommy could see her take a deep breath, but then her eyes clouded over and he couldn't read a thing about what she was feeling. Jude took a seat next to Chuck and clasped her hands on the table. "I take it Darius sent you? He wants Waking Blind to sign at G Major, yes?"

Her question came as a shock to Tommy. He expected anger and yelling, maybe even some tears...but certainly not professional and "down to business" Jude. Fumbling with his paperwork for a second, Tommy somewhat got a hold of himself and pushed the papers across the table for her to look at. "Yes. After what I saw tonight, you guys are pretty great. I heard that you write your own music too, and that is what we are looking for at G Major—true musicians. Darius has a contract waiting with your names on it."

Of the band members, Jack was the first to speak up. "So, just like that you're offering us a contract? That seems too easy."

"Well, there are obviously still details to work out, but yeah. You guys came with a high recommendation...my boss really trusts his sources." His last words were said looking straight at Jude. He had put things together after seeing her, even if it did take a few minutes to process. There were many people who would be able to get Darius to have contracts waiting to be signed. He always had a soft spot for Jude, and he knew that, no matter what, she was about the integrity and passion of the music. Kwest told him Jude was helping bands put together some demo tracks, so it wasn't hard to believe that she would work with a band as talented as Waking Blind.

Despite his attempts to get a reaction from her, Jude was still and her eyes were vacant. After another moment of silence, she asked, "What kind of a contract is D offering?"

No one else may have noticed the slip, but Tommy did. If hadn't already been sure that she was the one who prompted Darius to take a look, suspicions would have been confirmed by her comment. He was encouraged that she seemed to still be on good terms with G Major. In the long run, it would be easier to get her recording if she was still friendly with the studio. That was, assuming he could get her to talk to him...or look at him.

With a conscious effort, Tommy brushed those thoughts aside and got back to business. "To start, G Major is offering a single album contract. However, assuming things go well and upon the release of the album, you will be offered another two-album deal. You will retain partial rights to your unique material, and you will have a partial say in performances, appearances, content, etc."

It was a pretty impressive deal when you looked at it. Tommy was confident that, once they released their first album and became a hit, G Major would do just about anything to get them to sign another contract. The partial ownership of creative material was icing on the cake, so to say. Often times, musicians give up ownership of their music to studios and labels, but this deal let the band hold on to some of that control. It was any true artist's desire.

Tommy was ready to get up so that the band could talk it over amongst themselves, but was surprised when Chuck spoke up. "We'll talk it over tonight and give you an answer by tomorrow. Is there a specific time we should stop by the studio?"

"Darius has some time blocked off in the morning. Does 10:00am work for you?"

Seeing nods from the rest of the band members, Chuck gave his verbal agreement. "We'll see you at ten. Thanks for the offer, Tom."

"Honestly, it was my pleasure. You guys are great."

A chorus of "thanks" and "have a good night" filled the air as the band moved to leave. Seeing his opportunity to talk with Jude quickly dissipating, Tommy grabbed her arm as she got out of the booth. "Jude..."

Before he could get another word out, she interrupted him. "Tom, the band is coming by the studio tomorrow morning, it can wait until then. As for anything else, I'm tired and it's been a horridly long day."

Without so much as a "goodnight," Jude left him standing there, frustrated out of his mind. In that ten minute conversation with her, Tommy was right back where he started all those years ago. He was back to just being an ex-boybander who didn't know anything. She didn't want to talk to him, she didn't want to hear what he had to say.

And really, Tommy couldn't blame her. He had been a fool to leave like he did. He had been an idiot to wait so long to start something with her. He had been a moron to think that he could live without her. There was no doubt about it, he needed her. Tommy didn't care that he may very well spend the rest of his life making up for his mistakes and trying to get back into her good graces. He completely and desperately needed her in his life. More than ever, he was determined to make her fall for him again, make her understand how much he loves her.

…

Sitting at his desk again after such a long time was somewhat anticlimactic. Though he didn't expect trumpets to sound and co-workers to fawn over him, it was as though he never left. Waking Blind was set to arrive in about ten minutes and, once they signed contracts, Darius wanted them in the studio. He was listening to the demo tape on file—the one that sparked Darius' interest—and was impressed. They lyrics and sound were good, no doubt. But what was more impressive was the production. The sound quality and levels were near perfect—as if done by a professional.

If Tommy's thought that Jude had produced these tracks was correct, he was amazed. He always knew his girl was talented, but this was pretty spectacular. The producer in him would love to work with someone so naturally talented. As the one who cared so much about her, he would love to see her behind the booth and working with other artists.

A knock on his office door had him looking up to see Kwest. "Hey, man. What's up?"

"Sadie wanted me to let you know that the band is here."

Tommy was a bit surprised that Sadie was still working here, but Kwest had assured him that she was more of Darius' right-hand-gal than simply a receptionist. She was certainly intense enough to handle their boss, and she was pretty smart, so it wasn't crazy. Knowing that Darius didn't like to be kept waiting, Tommy stood and went to his boss' office. Already sitting around the room were the four band members, Darius, and Sadie.

"Where's Jude?" he asked before he could stop himself.

Darius smirked and Chuck answered. "She isn't technically part of the band. But, that leads nicely into the stipulations of our contract."

The easy confidence the guy had was disarming to Tommy. Usually he was the one in a room with the most confidence. "What kind of stipulations are we talking about?" Usually bands didn't make their own demands, but with one this good, they would hopefully be able to work something out.

"Well, we want to make sure that Jude is a co-producer on the album."

"No problem, as long as she agrees to it." Darius jumped in to assure the band that Jude's presence in the studio would be welcome. "Anything else?" His eagerness to proceed was obvious to Tom.

"We want Jude to be our co-writer. She will be named as such on the album, and receive the proceeds accordingly."

Tommy wasn't sure how to respond to their second request. He would love to have Jude in the studio, producing and writing, but he wasn't sure how she would take it. She left music for a reason, and he wasn't going to be the one to force her back. Uncertainty plaguing his mind, Tommy asked, "How does Jude feel about all of this?"

This time Riley spoke up, saying, "She's fine with it. We talked it over last night, and she agreed to be a part of things."

That decided, they finished discussing the details of the contract. Not fifteen minutes later, the band was signing and they were officially members of the G Major team. It was confirmed that Tommy would be their producer. He, of course, was thrilled. Working with Jude was exactly what he wanted.

After the band signed their contracts, they left the studio. They would be back in the studio bright and early on Monday morning, day after tomorrow. Somehow as they were leaving, it was discovered that Chuck was off to see Jude later that day. Tom knew that the musician wasn't dating anyone, and he also knew that Jude was technically single, but that bit of information left a bad taste in his mouth. He could tell that Chuck cared for Jude more than just as a friend. But he just got back, and he wanted a chance to reconcile with Jude before she moved on.

Standing up, Tom got ready to leave Darius' office, he was stopped by the man. "Tom?"

"Yeah, D?" Tommy wondered what his boss wanted now.

"I put you as Waking Blind's producer because you're the best we have. I know that they want Jude on the album too, which I have no problem with." Standing, Darius put his hands on his desk, clearly trying to be imposing and intimidating. "That being said, don't screw up and hurt her again. Anyone with eyes could see that you two had chemistry before. I'm willing to bet that those feelings may have resurfaced for both of you." At this point, Daius came around to the front of his desk and sat. "But don't mess it up. I don't want her running again." Another brief pause and then the boss said simply, "You can go."

Tom knew that he had been dismissed, but he was in such a daze that he didn't notice anything going on around him. Setting a path straight for his office, Tommy was startled when he bumped into a figure. Looking up, he realized that his roadblock was none other than Vincent Spiederman.

"Lord Squinty Frown?"

Spied used the hated nick name from a couple of years ago that made Tom cringe. "Vincent?" He could fight fire with fire.

"I heard rumors that you were back, but I'm a bit surprised to see you in the flesh. How's it going?"

A simple question should not have such a complicated response. But the confusion surrounding that question made Tom pause. He stood there speechless for a few minutes before his racing thoughts were interrupted.

"Really, it wasn't that hard of a question, but clearly you've got some things going on. I'd wager to guess it has something to do with my best friend and former lead singer."

There was no denying it at this point, so Tommy just nodded.

"Yeah, not at all surprising."

"Are you here recording?" Finally able to speak, Tommy asked the reason the kid was still at the studio. Kwest had mentioned something about Jude helping them write, but he hadn't thought about it until just then.

"Yeah!" Spied was clearly excited about his own music, which Tommy could truly understand. "We're just about finished up, only a couple of songs left." He paused abruptly before asking, "Waking Blind just signed, huh?"

"Yeah, just a few minutes ago, actually. Why?"

"I heard a rumor that you checked them out last night. Is that true?"

"Yeah." Tom was confused with where Spied was going with his questioning. Again he asked, "Why?"

The kid smiled, clearly up to something. "How'd she look?"

"Perfect...even more beautiful than I remember." The words were out of his mouth before he even processed what he had said.

Before he had time to be too embarrassed, Spied slapped his shoulder. "No need to worry, Dude. I understand."

"I just..." Again, he was interrupted by the guitarist.

"She's pretty spectacular, there's no denying it. But how is she reacting to you?"

Deciding to lay it all out in hopes that her best friend might be able to provide some inside, Tommy responded. "Honestly, it was weird. I saw her at the club last night and that was surprising...shocking, really. But it was so strange how emotionless she was. She wouldn't let me talk to her unless it was about the band." Tommy wasn't sure if his desperation was obvious, but from Spied's response, it was very clear.

"Dude, she has been kind of emotionless for the last year-and-a-half. Can you imagine how shocked she must have been to see you? She was heartbroken when you left and she didn't hear from you."

"I know, but..."

"But nothing, Dude. I don't need to know the details, but she did. She was so hurt that she built a wall around her that's ten feet thick."

Tommy listened to what Jude's best friend was saying, soaking up every bit of insight that he could. He motioned the younger man to follow him to his office. Sitting at his desk, Tommy asked, "Do you think she'll ever forgive me? Let me back in?"

A small laugh escaped from Spied that slightly angered Tommy. But, his words offered some encouragement. "Tommy, you and Jude will always come back to each other. It'll take a hell of a lot of patience, but prove that you care." He was about to stand, but stopped to ask one last question. "You do still care, right?"

"More than anything. I love her." The more often he said it and the more he acknowledged it, the more deeply he felt it. He loved Jude with everything in him. If it meant proving it, then he would do it. "How do I prove that to her? Hell, how do I just get her to talk to me?" There was a hint of pity in the younger man's eyes that drove Tommy crazy. But, he could take it so long as Spied was willing to give him more information.

"I'm willing to help, but I have to know one thing. I told you I didn't need details, and I don't. But, why didn't you call or write or text or email...something?"

The care and concern that Spied felt for Jude was obvious, and Tommy was grateful. His girl needed people in her life who cared so much for her. "There were a few reasons, but one of the most important was because if I heard her voice or talked to her, I would come straight back., and that just wasn't an option. What I was helping D take care of was really important, and I couldn't come back because I was selfish. In the end, I probably could have done a better job of handling things."

Seemingly satisfied with his response, Spied told him, "be honest with her. You know how important truth and honesty are to her. As for getting her to talk to you..." Spied paused as if to consider his options. A brief pause later, he continued. "Just wait until you're back in the studio together. You know how well you guys used to work together...get back to that place. If that fails, use music. If there is one thing that Jude will always listen to, its music."

The wisdom of Spiederman's words hit Tom like a slap in the face. He knew he would have to take it slow with her—be patient. But the idea to use music...that was pure genius. Of course, he would never tell that to the kid. "Thanks, man. I appreciate it."

"No worries, Dude." Spied stood to leave before saying a quick goodbye, with the reason being that he had to "get back to his lady."

Tom shook his head at the thought of Spiederman and Karma together, but pushed those thoughts aside as he gave a quick wave. Getting out a blank sheet of paper, Tommy grabbed a pen and started making a list. "Project Jude" had officially begun, and he had to get down to work.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Jude was still in a daze after last night. Everything had been going well until he showed up. But, if seeing him hadn't been bad enough, the way her breath caught and her heart started racing made things worse. She hated that her body still ached for him.

He had been gone for so long, and the moment she saw him, she wanted nothing more than to be swept up in his arms. For a brief second, Jude had almost done just that. Thankfully though, common sense kicked in and she remembered how heartbroken she was when he left. She remembered looking at her phone ever time it rang, hoping and praying it would be him. She remembered the many messages she left him trying to get through. She remembered feeling alone and lost, like she didn't matter to anyone.

The crick in her neck brought Jude back to the present. She was on the couch leaning against Chuck, but her head was twisted in the opposite direction. They had fallen asleep while watching _Sabrina_, one of Jude's favorites. Rubbing her neck, she stood and did a couple of quick stretches to ease the tension that was also settling in her back. As she set about making coffee, she thought back to yesterday.

Thankfully, with Waking Blind meeting Darius at G Major, she had the morning off. She had slept in until noon, when a text message notified her that the band was officially signed. She was excited for the band, but she also knew that it would mean working with Tommy again. Nate had suggested that they request Jude produce their premier album, working freelance for G Major. Riley and Jack were quick to jump on board, but it was Chuck who was really excited about the possibility.

Not able to say no to them, Jude had agreed. Riley then suggested that Jude also be named as their co-writer. She explained that Jude had been such a huge help and that Waking Blind wouldn't even have the possibility of a record contract without her writing skills. After much discussion and convincing, Jude had agreed to be a part of their team, so long as G Major was okay with it.

After waking up, Jude had cleaned up her loft and headed into her studio. Since her party, she had been prompted to write, and seeing Tommy the night before had certainly provided some inspiration. Though nothing had come together, she had spent the better part of the afternoon just tinkering around, writing and re-writing lyrics, changing chords, and working out melodies.

Around six, Spied had called, telling Jude that he would be over in an hour, Karma in tow, and that they were having dinner together. She had been thrilled to have the company, her best friend and his wife offering a welcome distraction from the anticipation of getting back into G Major. The three had talked throughout the meal, sitting at the table long after their dinner was finished. Around nine o'clock, Chuck had shown up at her door, ingredients for a fruit crisp in hand.

Anytime that Chuck showed up with ingredients to bake, Jude knew that they were bound to have some delicious food. He quickly got to work in her kitchen while Jude cleaned some of the dishes, the pair talking all the while. Spied and Karma were in the other room starting a movie, but Chuck and Jude had joined them quickly with dessert in hand.

The night had progressed well, with lots of laughter and good conversation. Spied and Karma had left after the first movie, and Chuck stayed to watch _Sabrina_ with Jude. Before starting the movie, they had talked a bit, Chuck knew that something was wrong—she had been acting off since the night before at the club. She confessed that she knew Tommy from when she was a recording artist with G Major. She told him how one day he left without a word to hardly anyone, not even her—one of his best friends. Though she didn't tell him that she was sure Tommy could be the one love of her life, the soulmate that everyone searched for, anyone with ears would know that he was special to her. Somewhere towards the beginning of her story, Jude started to cry, the emotion Tommy evoked being too much to hold in. She explained the fear of being alone and not having anyone close.

Finishing with her story, Jude tried to brush of the emotion-laden atmosphere, but was stopped by Chuck. He simply held her in his arms for a few moments, triggering a whole new round of tears, and a whole new wave of sadness. They sat like that for a while, enjoying the company of each other's. After Jude's tears had subsided, they simply watched the movie, Jude cherishing the ability to take a break from work. Three-quarters of the way through, conversation had ceased and both Jude and Chuck had fallen asleep, much to the irritation of her neck this morning.

Nonetheless, here she was this morning, sitting at her dining room table and thoroughly relishing the quiet moment. With the craziness of her life lately, a moment of silence was always welcome. Hearing Chuck begin to stir on the couch, Jude got up and poured another cup of coffee for him. Setting it on the coffee table, she put a hand to his cheek and caressed it lightly. She was grateful for his friendship, and thankful that they had gotten to know each other so well over the past few months. He seemed to know what she needed without a word, and was always willing to stick around just to make sure that she was doing okay.

His eyes opened at her touch, and she told him, "I'm gonna grab a shower real quick, help yourself to anything in the fridge." She began to walk up the stairs to her room and bathroom, but paused when she heard his voice.

"Do you have any plans for today?"

"No. Did you have something in mind?" Jude asked, turning on the stairs to face him.

"Well, I have a few tricks up my sleeve. Be ready to go in an hour. As soon as this coffee kicks in, I'm going to head home and get changed. I'll be back soon with coffee and croissants from that French place you like down the street."

The thought of gourmet coffee and delicious pastries made Jude's mouth water. She ran the rest of the way up the stairs and hopped in the shower, knowing that it would probably take Chuck less than an hour be back.

Fifty minutes later, Jude was showered and ready, makeup on, and hair done. She was walking down to her living room when the front door opened, Chuck entering the room, weighed down by breakfast and coffee. "Perfect timing!" Jude called as she ran down the remaining steps to help him.

Setting the items on her table, Jude gave Chuck a quick hug before sitting down to their breakfast delights. Jude didn't mention their conversation from the previous night, instead focusing her attention on trying to figure out what her companion had planned for the day. "Just tell me!" she cajoled," batting her eyelashes in an attempt to sway his stubbornness.

"Nope, you're just going to have to wait and see." The pair finished their breakfast and stood, clearing off the table. "Now, run upstairs and grab a jacket, I'm not sure how cool it will be today."

Following her friend's orders, Jude took the steps two at a time and retrieved a jacket from her closet. Jogging back down the steps, she nearly tripped and fell on her face, recovering at the last moment. The laughter coming from Chuck made it obvious that he had seen her misstep, but Jude only laughed off his response. "Oh, shut up!" she laughed, hitting him on the shoulder when she reached the place he was standing.

She felt his arm go around her, and Jude couldn't help but smile. Chuck was so good to her—always taking care of her and helping her to laugh. "So, where are we off to?"

Another laugh escaped his lips before Chuck answered, "The only thing I will tell you is that we're going to take a short drive before arriving at our destination." Removing his arm from its place around her shoulders, he grabbed her hand and led her out the door.

It took a bit longer than expected, but about thirty minutes later, Chuck drove them up to a clearing by the beach. They got out, but before he joined her at a path entrance he grabbed a basket from the back of his truck. She looked at it questioningly, but didn't say anything, simply letting him lead her to their destination.

Not five minutes later, they arrived to a small opening in the trees that was right on the water. The area was perfect: quiet and beautiful, completely peaceful. Turning to Chuck, Jude smiled her thanks. "This is so beautiful! How did you find it? And why did you bring me here?"

Setting the basket on the ground before stepping next to her, Chuck explained. "I like to take runs by the water, that way I don't have to deal with people. One time I found this spot and figured it would be perfect for a picnic. So..." he paused to lead her over to the blanket that he unfurled on the ground. "Are you hungry?"

Though they had eaten only an hour ago, Jude's stomach was starting to growl again. "You know me well, Chuck. What do you have?"

"After grabbing our croissants this morning, I stopped by that cafe you like and grabbed sandwiches and fruit salad. Sound good?"

"Perfect," was Jude's only response before plopping a grape in her mouth.

They enjoyed their lunch, Chuck making her laugh with his impressions of his band-mates and Will Ferrell. After finishing, he pulled a football out of his basket of tricks. "What's that for?" Jude asked.

Instead of answering, he asked, "Can you play?"

Jude laughed, "Right! A klutz like me playing football...funny!"

Standing up, Chuck pulled her to her feet. "Well, you're going to learn."

He proceeded to teach her how to throw the perfect spiral, filling their afternoon with plenty of laughter, clumsiness, and good memories. Jude had a hint of inspiration around four, and was thrilled when Chuck pulled a guitar out of his trunk. Never knowing when music would grab a hold, he tended to have a guitar with him wherever he went. Hours later, Jude had been able to get down the basic story of a new song along with the chords and melodies. Satisfied, the pair cleaned up their area and were off.

As Chuck drove them to the next secret destination, Jude was again reminded of how good a friend he was to her. Since meeting him a few months ago, they had automatically clicked, having many common interests—music, of course, being the biggest. He always knew what she needed, and he always had a joke at hand, ready to make her laugh.

"Thanks, Chuck...for today." Patting his shoulder, she continued. "I really needed a day off, a chance to get away."

"I know. After you told me about Tommy last night, I thought that it would be good to have a day away before the drama starts in the studio."

"Thanks." Wanting to lighten the mood a bit, she asked where they were headed next.

"We are off to the drive-in."

Jude was confused, thinking that it was too early for a movie, but upon looking out the window, she could see it getting dark. "Sounds good. What's playing?"

"We are going to see _Breakfast at Tiffanys_, a classic Audrey Hepburn film."

A smile lit her face at the knowledge that he remembered how much she loved Audrey Hepburn. They drove to the middle of the lot where cars were directed to park and turned off the engine. Chuck pulled out a portable radio and dialed in to the correct station, enabling them to hear the movie. They settled in to watch, and Jude reveled in the moments.

Eventually the movie finished, leaving her tired and ready for an early night. Tomorrow would be intense, and Jude figured she could use all the sleep she could get. It would be her first time back at G Major where she would be working, not just visiting. More than that, she would be working with Tommy. How was she supposed to be in the same room with him for more than ten minutes? She had been with him for less time than that in a crowded club the other night and had barely been able to stand straight. Secretly, though, she was excited to work with him again. They had always clicked so perfectly when it came to music, but that was also where she fell in love with him. Jude expected that being back in the studio with him would be torturous, she would have to deny the feelings that were still raging inside of her. She couldn't let him affect her the way she used to.

Lost in her thoughts, Jude failed to notice that Chuck had pulled up at the rehearsal building. Once she looked over at him, she smiled. "Thanks for today, Chuck. I really needed it."

"I figured it would be helpful to take a break from things. I'm glad you enjoyed."

"I really did." Jude was ready to open her door when she was stopped by a hand on hers.

"Jude?"

It was odd the way he said her name, something was clearly on his mind. "Yes?"

He took a deep breath and paused. After a moment he grabbed her hand and looked at her. "Jude, I just wanted you to know that I'm here for you. You told me about Tom and now you'll have to work with him on our album, and I know that won't be easy. If you need to vent or scream, just let me know. If you need to escape, like today, I'll be your knight in a big shiny truck."

Overwhelmed by his kindness and thoughtfulness, a tear gathered in Jude's eye. She could only nod in appreciation, her throat catching with emotion. Even if she hadn't told him everything about Tom, he seemed to know that there was more to it.

Squeezing her hand, he smiled at her for a moment. Leaning over, he placed a sweet kiss on her cheek, letting his lips linger a moment longer than expected. Pulling back slightly, he told her, "I'll pick you up tomorrow, okay?"

Finally able to speak again, she agreed. "That sounds great. Thank you again for tonight. I really appreciate you, Chuck." She wanted him to know how special of a friend he was, he was a lifesaver on days like today. She needed him to understand how grateful she was of his friendship.

"Perfect. Sleep well, beautiful."

She smiled at his words and got out of the car. The whole way up to her loft she held onto his words, truly taking joy in them. Opening her door, however, the full impact of his words took effect. Chuck had called her beautiful...what did that mean? He kissed her too. Granted, the kiss was on her cheek, but it seemed to last a bit longer than usual. Did it mean anything?

If her life wasn't complicated enough already with Tommy being back in the picture, this potential "thing" with Chuck was just plain strange. Did she even like him back? Jude shook her head at the thought. There was no way she could start something with Chuck when she was still completely in love with Tom Quincy. And yes, as much as she tried to deny it, she did still love him.

But, starting tomorrow, they would simply be coworkers. She would rid herself of this strange obsession she still held for the mysterious "Little Tommy Q." Seeing him the other night made it obvious that she needed to get a life. She needed to move on. Maybe there something could happen with Chuck in the future. Regardless, Jude knew that she needed to get some sleep. Tomorrow would be a crazy day, and she would need as much energy as possible.

Getting into bed, a smile crept onto her face. The kiss was nice, and she did like being taken care of. Of course, it may just be her loneliness and a desire for companionship—it had been over six months since she had any semblance of a relationship. Trying to clear her mind, Jude pushed aside thoughts of Chuck and Tommy, brushed off her confusion, and settled into the pillows. The situation wouldn't change by tomorrow morning, and she needed rest.

…

The next morning brought a late start for Jude. She was caught up in Tommy: the feel of his hands holding her close and the taste of his lips. It was only in her dreams that she felt such delight, but for those few moments, it was perfection. Of course, Jude wouldn't let anyone in on her little secret, it was only something brought on in sweet dreams.

Chuck arrived as she was finishing getting dressed, but she called down to him to grab some coffee for the pot. She heard laughter from downstairs, and realized that she hadn't been shopping in weeks, likely leaving her without any grounds.

Only a few minutes later, she was ready, heading downstairs immediately in hopes that they would have time to grab some coffee at a local cafe. Indeed, with time to spare, the pair grabbed coffee for themselves, the band, Darius, and Kwest. Sadie's pregnancy inhibited her ability to drink caffeine, otherwise a latte would have been waiting for her as well.

Walking into G Major, Jude was greeted with a chorus of "hello's" from different people, but the welcoming from her former band was by far the best. As she saw her best friend coming towards her, Jude handed her coffee off to Chuck, who was still by her side. Spied ran to her and picked her up, spinning her around. As soon as she was set down, Kyle and Wally tackled her to the ground. The three began wrestling, and were quickly joined by Spied who jumped on top of them. Moments later, they were interrupted by the booming voice of none other than Tom Quincy.

"What the hell do you think you are doing? Get off of her you damned fools, you could hurt her the way you're crushing her!"

As much as she hated herself for it, her heart quickened at the sound of his voice defending her. But remembering what he had done, she quickly scowled at him, grumbling under her breath, "I'm fine. No need to overreact."

Her harsh words were muffled by the sounds of their movement. Wally and Kyle each offered her a hand, while her best friend put his hands on her waist, helping to support her. Once they were all upright, Chuck handed her coffee back to her, and Jude took a long sip, trying to calm her already fraying nerves. If things were going to be this difficult—before they even got into the studio—how were they going to work together for a whole album?

With that question in mind, Jude smiled at her friends, squeezing the hand of Spied and then patting Chuck on the back. She grabbed her boss' coffee and, without a word to the others, marched straight into his office. "I can't do it," she said with resolute certainty.

After he took a sip of his own hot drink, Darius asked her, "You can't do what?"

Sitting in a chair opposite his after closing the door, Jude looked into her hands. "I can't work with him."

"Tom?" he clarified.

"Yeah. I can't do it...its too hard."

"Jude..." Her boss only said one word, but it spoke volumes.

In that one word was pity, disappointment, confusion, and concern. She knew that Darius cared for her well-being, like a concerned uncle or friend. Since she had parted ways with the studio in a professional capacity, her relationship with Darius had turned much more friendly. She was no longer only seen as potential profits, but as a person, a friend.

Finally looking up at him, Jude shrugged her shoulders. "I don't think I can do it." Tears began to form in her eyes, frustrating her. She had tried to be so strong, but at every turn she seemed to break down.

"I know it won't be easy, Jude. I know that Tom hurt you a lot, but know that there is always more to the story. Besides, you know that Waking Blind needs you on their album. I heard them before you came along, and they were okay. But once you started working with them, they became great. You can't let them down."

"I know!" she cried. "But Darius, how can I work with him day in and day out knowing that he lied to me. Knowing that I fell for his act and became another one of his groupies?"

At her words, the man across from her looked up in surprise. "Fell for his act?" he asked quietly. He knew what Tom's reputation was, and his hope that Jude had not been fooled too much was written clearly on his face.

"Not like that, D." She saw his concern immediately, and eased his conscience. "I just..."

As soon as it became clear that she had no more words, Darius spoke. "Jude, I know that it won't be easy, but there isn't another option. Unless you want to give up on their album, you will be working with Tom. You know I care about you, Jude, but suck it up. Work with Tom in the studio, and don't to say a word to him otherwise."

Though she hated the truth of his words, Jude knew that Darius had a point. She was nineteen, living on her own, with a band's future partially resting in her hands. She had a responsibility to them to make their music as incredible as it could be. She had to grow up...even if she didn't like it.

"I get it, D." She stood and straightened her shoulders. Taking a step towards the door, she looked back at the older man and nodded, "Thank you."

"Anytime, Jude. Anytime." Before she could even ask, he finished with the location of where they would be recording, "Studio A."

She smiled at him, noting the obvious sincerity in his voice. Jude was grateful for it, knowing that he cared for her well-being, and that he would always be available if she needed him. Having someone who cared so much for her was comforting, especially since her dad had moved away last year.

Walking out of Darius' office, Jude went straight to Studio A, not stopping to say a word to her sister, brother-in-law, or best friend. She knew that working with Tom was a necessity, and for the sake of Waking Blind, she was willing to do it. But Jude also knew that if she didn't get straight to work, she would lose her nerve.

Opening the door to the studio and closing her eyes, Jude took a deep breath. _ You can do it, you can do it, you can do it._ She chanted the mantra to herself over and over again. Opening her eyes, she walked in the sound booth and sat on one of the chairs. Thankfully, Waking Blind was already there, and the five of them got straight to work. Chuck pulled out a binder full of songs they had been working on, and they started discussing the feel they wanted to album to have.

Not quite thirty minutes later, Tommy walked in, looking as sexy as hell. Jude's breath caught in her throat, causing her to cough. A moment later she still hadn't recovered, and Chuck started patting her on the back. He offered her his bottled water, and the coughing attack finally stopped once she took a sip.

A self-assured smirk on his face, Tommy looked over at her from the seat he had taken and asked, "You okay?"

Glaring at him quickly, she looked back down at the binder that was still sitting on her lap. Completely ignoring him, she said "So, I definitely think this song should be on the album. Let's give it a go in the booth." And Jude did think it was a great song, and not just because she had a huge role in writing it. It was one of many cathartic efforts to flush Tommy from her system. Of course, it hadn't worked, but the band came out with a damn good song.

Before there could be any disagreement, Chuck stood and motioned for the rest of the band to follow him into the booth. One by one they went in, but before she joined the three boys, Riley bent down so that her face was next to Jude's ear. Whispering, she asked, "You gonna be okay with him?"

Smiling at her friend, Jude nodded. "I'll be fine. You go start singing your first hit record."

Riley joined the rest of her band and they started right in. They took take after take, each one better than the previous. In their section of the studio, Jude and Tom would suggest some directions and adjust levels accordingly. During the course of the day, he tried to talk to her seven different times, and she caught him staring at least twelve times. Each time she brushed him off, not wanting to deal with him as more than a co-producer.

Around seven that evening, the group was finally finishing up. Jack was putting away his guitar, and Tom was shutting off the board. Riley was gathering up her purse, water bottle, lip balm, and the other accoutrements that had gathered around the studio. Nate had already left for home. Jude was exhausted, emotionally worn out, and her muscles sore. Chuck had just finished packing up his guitar and turned to Jude as he stood up. Putting a hand on her shoulder, he smiled when she looked up at him.

"I think things went well today," he offered.

"Well?" Jude was surprised by his comment. They had finished recording one whole song and had started another. In addition, the group had perfected the lyrics for a few more songs that they wanted on the album. "I think that for our first day in the studio, that was pretty amazing. You guys did great."

"Thanks." Chuck took a look around the studio, almost as if he was avoiding her gaze.

"What is it, Chuck?" Jude could tell there was something on his mind, but she wasn't sure what was going on. Clearly he was trying to say something, but he was hesitant.

"I was...uh..." He paused, looking at Tommy, who was now the only other one in the room with them since the other couple had just vacated into the lobby. It was obvious that he didn't want the other man there, but the producer gave no indication that he would be leaving soon. Finally, he asked Jude "You wanna grab some dinner tonight? My treat?"

"That sounds perfect." And truly, it did. Jude had a student who she was teaching guitar to on Monday evenings, but the high school student had to cancel their lesson that night. Besides, this was the perfect excuse not to be stuck with Tommy.

As much as she had been dreading the day, it had gone well. She knew how to anticipate exactly what Tommy needed, and she was able add her input for what would make the band sound exceptional. Her co-producer seemed to listen to her suggestions and respect her thoughts. But, regardless of how smoothly things had gone, Jude couldn't be around him longer than necessary. She knew that he wanted to talk to her, but she wouldn't let it happen. She wouldn't let him explain away why he left and caused her so much hurt and pain. More, she wouldn't allow herself to be sucked in to some "sob story" and fall for him again. And right now, the only way to avoid that was to avoid him.

With that thought in mind, Jude grabbed her bag and guitar, and walked out of the studio with Chuck at her side. They didn't say another word to Tommy, instead deciding where they should eat. Deciding on one of Jude's favorite Greek restaurants, they were off. As they opened the front door to the studio, Jude could feel Tommy's eyes boring into her back, but she ignored them. She walked on as if she didn't feel the magnetic pull he always ignited in her.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

The rest of the week brought more of the same. Waking Blind was in the studio every day, with Tommy and Jude on the other side of the glass. So long as they didn't talk about anything not music related, they were fine. But that was the very reason that Tommy was frustrated out of his mind. He desperately wanted to talk to her—to make her understand why he left, and why he didn't come back to Toronto for so long. He needed to explain why he didn't call, and how stupid he realized that decision was.

Tom would rather her yell and scream at him—be angry and upset—than he would have them continue this surface-level interaction that only ever had anything to do with music. After five long days filled with talk of levels, beats, and the perfect sound, Tommy had enough. He was determined to talk to her today, no matter what it took. Riley and Jack had already left the booth—they were usually the first to leave the studio once the band was done recording. Nate had left earlier that day following a strange phone call from his wife, and Jude was talking to Darius. Chuck was the only one in the booth at the moment, clearly taking an extra long time packing up his things in order to wait for Jude.

That irked Tom even more; he was the one who should be waiting for Jude and giving her rides home. Of the five days they had in the studio, Chuck had given her a ride home four of them, and had taken her out to dinner three of them. Tom was set on breaking that pattern.

Realizing the perfect opportunity before him, Tom opened the door that separated the studio and the booth. "Chuck, man?"

Startled, Chuck looked up at the producer. "Yeah?" he asked with hesitation.

"You don't have to wait for Jude today." Tom hoped that a simple explanation would suffice, but the skeptical look covering the band member's face was evidence that it would take a bit more. Before Chuck could say anything, Tom explained further, "For the sake of your music, we decided that we have a lot of shit to work through. We are going to talk things through tonight so that recording can go much more smoothly in the future."

Chuck still looked a bit unsure, but after a few seconds, nodded his head. "Fine. I do want to say goodbye though."

Tom knew that if Chuck waited to say bye to Jude, his little plan wouldn't work. Thinking fast, he told the other man, "She's actually in with Darius giving him an update. Those meetings usually take a while, and she's only been in there about five minutes. It'll be a while." That was the best he could do short of physically shoving him out of the studio.

Chuck stared at Tom as if trying to determine whether he was lying or not. After a few minutes, he nodded again. "Okay. Have her call me when she leaves?"

Though he said it as a question, Tom knew it was slightly more than that. He simply said, "Sure," and waved Chuck off.

The timing couldn't have been better, as Jude walked out of Darius' office as the main door to the studio was closing. She strode across the lobby and quickly made her way to Studio A. Opening the door, she started speaking before realizing that she was alone with Tommy.

"Chu..." Looking around, surprise was evident on her face when Chuck wasn't in the room. "Where's Chuck?" she asked.

"He had to go." His plan had not been thought out well enough to anticipate her question, and that was the best he could come up with. "But, can we talk...just for a couple of minutes." He looked at her with the same sweet eyes and sexy smile that made other girls swoon.

But, Jude was not like any other girl, and his charms had little effect. Tom thought he caught a hint of the beginning of a smile, but he wasn't sure if it was just wishful thinking. She rolled her eyes, but before she could get a word out, he interrupted her. "Jude, we need to at least clear the air a little...for the sake of the band."

In the process of packing up her guitar and putting away her journal, Jude appeared to be deep in thought. However, a few moments later, she nodded. Taking a deep breath, she told him, "Fine." She took a seat in the chair next to his and looked at him intently. "But just so you know, I am _only_ doing this for the sake of the band. They deserve the best, and if you getting things off your chest will mean that we work better, then so be it."

Being completely honest, Tom was disappointed with her response. He had hoped that by somewhat manipulating her into talking with him, she would give in and be open to some conversation. Pushing those thoughts aside, he turned to face her completely. She was obviously irritated with him, but she looked so beautiful at the same time. Her cheeks were rosy with frustration, eyes sparked with passion, and lips turned in a sexy frown. Never before had Tom thought someone could make a frown sexy, but that was Jude. Everything she did was perfect, and she had no idea. She was oblivious as to how much she turned men on, especially him.

Tommy lost all of the words he intended to say in an effort to clear the air because he was so taken by the vision in front of him. Since he hadn't spoken, she had began to tap her fingers on the soundboard, and Tom knew that she was going over a song in her head. The beat didn't sound familiar, and he wondered if it was one of Waking Blind's songs, or if, by chance, it was one of her own. He would love nothing more than to be producing her music again—seeing her passion and every thought shine through in her songs.

Tom was overwhelmed with memories of their time in the studio, stuck on images of her standing on her head and them recording _White Lines_ on the bus. The second memory brought on the recollection of the kiss they shared in Darius' office after he approved the song, and Tommy couldn't help kissing her then and their. He was literally taken over by a need to taste her lips and feel her next to him.

Leaning forward, he pressed his lips to hers. Cupping her cheek with his palm, he brought her closer, his other hand holding on to the arm of the chair she was still seated in. The sweetness of her lips was like heaven. It was a drug he couldn't get enough of, and Tommy knew that he would be addicted forever. Nothing would suffice to satisfy him like she would. They had done nothing more than share a few perfect kisses, but he knew that would be enough. Just as all thoughts began to leave him and he surrendered fully to their kiss, Jude pulled back abruptly.

She looked at him with wide eyes, and after a moment, she slapped him across the cheek. "What the _hell_ was that?" she whispered loudly.

Lost for words, Tommy opened his mouth and closed it again. This was so completely not what he had intended to do. He knew that the only possibility they had for moving forward was if he told her what happened. If he could explain why he didn't call and how stupid he realized he was, then there mighty be a hope for a future.

Finally getting a grasp on his thoughts, the first words out of Tom's mouth were, "I'm sorry!" But before he could say more, she interrupted him.

Jumping off of her chair, Jude began pacing. "You're sorry? Sure you are! I should have known this would be a disaster. You are incapable of being professional and just getting the job done. The minute I even think of letting you just explain, you are an idiot. Why would this time be any different? Of course you're going to hurt me and of course you're going to make things weird. What do we do now? What about the band? Maybe we could switch days producing...do some sort of trade off? Or maybe I should tell Darius I can't do it. I can't do this again! I just can't take..."

Bot allowing her rant to continue, Tom stood up as well and stood in front of her. Placing his hands on her shoulders, he stopped her pacing, causing her to look at him and glare. Though he didn't love being glared at, Tommy thought it was better than the numb interaction they shared recently.

"Jude, listen to me." When she looked about to protest, it was his turn to interrupt her. "No. We are going to talk, and you are going to listen. If nothing other than for the sake of the band, we need to sort some of this out. Okay?"

Reluctantly she nodded and moved away from him. Tommy thought he would have to chase after her, but was somewhat surprised when she sat in one of the chairs. Sighing in a sense of relief, Tommy too sat down and spun his chair to face her. "First, I am sorry. I will probably be saying that a lot, but know that its true. I am so sorry for the hurt and confusion I have caused, and I'm sorry for not calling, and I'm sorry for not trusting our friendship. I'm sorry for kissing you, because it wasn't the way to handle things."

When Jude didn't say anything, he wasn't sure what to say next. He looked at his hands and contemplated where to begin.

As he mulled over the possibilities in his head, a softer version of her voice broke through his thoughts. "Why?"

Confused, Tom clarified, "Why what?"

Jude closed her eyes, and breathed in. She held her breath for a moment before letting it out. Raising her eyes to meet his, Tommy could see the sadness and the hurt reflected in the blue depths of her eyes. He wanted nothing more than to hold her to him and make every bit of pain and hurt go away. But Tom knew that he had to give her some answers first.

Looking around, Tommy was about to start his story with the phone call he received from Darius over a year-and-a-half ago. Suddenly, he felt suffocated...claustrophobic in the room that had seemed so much like home since he met Jude. Standing suddenly, he asked, "Can we go for a drive?"

After a brief pause, Jude smirked. "Well, you'll have to give me a ride home anyways since my ride 'had somewhere to be'."

Tommy couldn't help the smile that came to his face. He picked up her guitar and moved toward the door. He held it open for her, then following her to the parking lo behind the studio. Again, he opened the door for her and helped her in, putting her guitar in the back. Running to the driver's side, Tom quickly got in and turned on the car, startled when his companion's voice filled the vehicle.

Yes, he listened to her music as he drove...and when at home...and when working out... Really, he listened to her any chance he could as a way of keeping her close. He quickly turned down the volume so that it could not be heard, and glanced in her direction. He couldn't hide the bit of pleasure he derived from seeing a blush highlight her face ever so slightly.

As they pulled out of the parking lot, he began. "I guess I should start with the phone call."

At her nod, he continued. "That night after dropping you off, I went home. But, before I could even fall asleep, Darius called." Taking a deep breath, Tom thought back to that night. He couldn't believe that one phone call had changed so much. He could see Jude begin to fidget again when he didn't say anything for a few moments. Quickly, he opened his mouth and proceeded with the story.

"Darius told me that Kim was back to drinking, and he needed to get Maya out of there. It was supposed to be easy—get Kim into rehab and prove that I was a fit guardian. He said it would take six months, but no longer. Once I got there, things were fine for a couple of weeks. But then, the day Kim was supposed to go to the facility, she disappeared. They couldn't find her for three months, and once they did, she was completely strung out. She had to go through a two-week detox program before they would let her into rehab. Once she detoxed, she refused to go, and being in her right mind, they couldn't force her. Finally, after another month, she was going to commit to the program, but then something triggered her and she disappeared again. This time she was gone for five months, and again, all legal proceedings had to stop."

Tom paused again, remembering how crazy things had been once they found Kim the second time. "After figuring out where she was, the authorities went to pick her up and bring her in. But, they realized that she was staying with a notorious drug dealer and pimp. Somehow, they roped her in to helping to catch the guy, as long as she was protected. Working three months undercover, they had enough evidence to put the guy away. But of course, during that whole time—her running away, the undercover operation, refusing rehab—none of the legal work could continue. After being there for a year, Kim ultimately decided to go to rehab, and the custody process could actually start. As soon as the six months were up and I was declared a fit guardian for Maya, I brought her back."

Finishing his story, Tommy made a quick turn, realizing that they were close to the pier. Pulling onto the expanse overlooking the water, he parked the car and closed his eyes. It felt good to get the events of the last eighteen months off of his chest. More, it felt good to know that she had the full story. Opening one eye to gauge Jude's reaction, he wasn't surprised to see her completely still with eyes glazed over. Closing his eye again, he waited for her reaction, knowing that she was bound to have some questions once she processed everything.

Tommy was not disappointed when her heard her ask, "Why didn't you tell me?"

This was the part of the story that he had been dreading. Nonetheless, he opened his eyes and looked at the water. There was no way he could handle seeing the hurt in her eyes when he explained his stupidity. "First, Darius told me not to. He told me that Kwest would take care of you and that it was for the best. Of course, I didn't agree, but he also told me that there would be consequences if I didn't go along with his plan. He said that I would just hurt you in the end. Even if I wasn't going to mess you up, you would want to come and help."

At this, Tommy smiled. To this day, he knew that if he told Jude the real reason he had to leave, she would have picked up her life to help out in a second. Her sense of compassion was overwhelming, especially when dealing with kids.

Forging on, he confessed, "I know that I should have let you know, but I couldn't have you giving up your music for something like that...you needed to be making music. Even if you didn't come with me, you would have been worried and your focus wouldn't have been the same."

Before he could continue though, Jude erupted. "I would have been worried? My focus wouldn't have been the same? Do you think by not talking to me that I wasn't worried, Tom? That I wasn't thinking about you all the time? If you were okay? If you were even alive? If my music was that bad? If there was someone else? What I had done to make you forget me so easily?"

He last question, though cried in frustration, struck a chord in him. "No!" he exclaimed. No matter what the issues had been when he left, he had never forgotten her. Making sure she understood, he explained, "Jude, I never forgot you...not for a second! You were about the only thing that was always on my mind." At his confession, Tom turned to face her, grabbing her left hand in the process. Subconsciously, he began to rub circles on the top of her hand, taking comfort even in the minimal touch they shared at that moment.

She looked at him with a bit of confusion clouding her eyes. After a moment, tears began to fall as the emotion of the situation took over. Not knowing what to do, Tom pulled her close and held her to him. More than anything, he wanted to take away her pain...take away the hurt he caused...take away every ounce of insecurity she felt because of his poor choices.

"Jude, I am so sorry." Over and over he repeated the words, figuring the more she heard them, the more they would be ingrained into her mind. "I'm so sorry, Baby."

Minutes later they separated, Jude wiping the tears from her eyes. Sitting back into the passenger's seat, she looked back over the water. After another moment of silence, Jude took a deep breath and turned to Tommy. "I get why you had to leave, Tom. I'm glad it was you who was taking care of Maya, because it's so obvious that you care about her. But Tom, it isn't that easy."

Before he could say anything, Jude put a hand up and continued. "Regardless of anything remotely romantic between us, we were best friends before you left. I could tell you anything and count on you for anything. I knew about your family and your secret Boyz Attack stories. And then you left without a word. I get that you don't see what everyone else does, but didn't I deserve to know? Didn't you trust me enough to tell me what was going on?"

Grabbing the hand that was still held up, he clasped it in both of his own hands. Not allowing her to say another word, Tommy said, "Jude, you are the only one I ever trusted so much! I know that I was an idiot for not telling you. As cliché as it sounds, it wasn't you, it was me...try to understand." He pleaded the last words, attempting to convey how true his words were.

Allowing her tears to stop, Jude looked up at him again. "I understand, even if I don't agree. But honestly, Tom...what do you want from me?"

Wanting to be as honest as possible, he didn't answer right away. Thinking back to his conversations with Kwest and Spied, Tommy decided not to confess how much he loved her. He didn't tell her that he wanted to be with her forever, and that he would marry her tomorrow if she would agree to it. Instead, he simply explained, "I was selfish in not contacting you, I know that. But I also know that I missed you more than anything...anyone. I just want to rebuild the friendship we had."

Taking her hands back, Jude looked at him, a hint of confusion and frustration in her eyes. "I don't know, Tom. I missed you so much...but you have to understand how hurt I was when you left without a word. I don't know if I can go there again. I don't know if my heart can take it."

She took another deep breath, as if trying to contain her composure. "We'll still work together in the studio, and I promise not to be so cold towards you when we aren't working, but I can't promise anything more."

He wanted to yell at her and tell her that she was wrong. But rather than lashing out, he only nodded. "Then that's how it will be right now. I can't promise that I won't try to re-build the friendship that we had, but I understand why you can' go there right now." Tom pat her knee with a free hand and then moved it to the clutch. He began to pull out of the lot by the pier, automatically heading in the direction of her place. He knew that he told her he understood, but it wouldn't stop him from trying to win her back.

With everything in him, he needed her. He needed her like he needed music...they were a part of him. Only minutes later, he pulled into the lot in front of her loft, the former rehearsal studio and let her out of the car. "I'll see you tomorrow?" he asked.

"Yep. See you then."

Her response was simple, but it gave him hope. She spoke to him without yelling, and she wasn't completely ignoring him. These small details were like little victories in the battle to win Jude back. Satisfied with the progress they made today, Tom pulled back onto the street once he made sure she got inside the building. Though he would have loved to have her admit that she loved him and that they should be together forever, he also knew it was unrealistic. That being the case, he took what he could. If that meant that they were nothing more than co-workers at the moment, then so be it.

…

Over the next three months, it was simply more of the same. While working with Waking Blind in the studio, Jude and Tommy were perfectly in sync. He didn't have to say anything, only look at her and she would immediately change a level or adjust an instrument. She would barely open her mouth to suggest a change in the chord progression or the lyrics, and he would nod, using the intercom to relay her unspoken thoughts to the band.

Outside of the studio, Tom would try to engage Jude in conversation by asking her opinion on other artists he was producing, melodies of the songs they were working with the band on, and how her sister was doing. He knew it was somewhat manipulative to use Sadie and the impending baby to draw Jude in, but it was working. When asked, she would give him updates on how things were progressing. Granted, he knew most of the information already from Kwest; but any excuse to talk to Jude about something outside of work was welcome.

Of course, as soon as their topics would veer away from the band they were producing, conversation was interrupted within minutes. Usually, Spied, Wally, and Kyle were the culprits, often tackling Jude in excitement when they saw her. Invariably, that would lead to discussion about their solo album, and Jude would be pulled in to help them write.

Not surprisingly, the songs she co-wrote were some of their best work. She knew them so well that she was able to bring out their fun side in music. Currently, their third single was making its way through the charts. It was a quirky song they had penned one night after commiserating the loss of Kyle's most recent girlfriend. No one had liked the girl, even Tommy could see that she was calculating and controlling.

When not spending time with her former bandmates, Jude spent a good deal of time with Waking Blind, specifically with Chuck. It was obvious to anyone who watched them interact that the band member had feelings much beyond friendship for Jude. Of no surprise to Kwest, Sadie, or anyone who knew him, Tommy was completely irritated by their friendship. He didn't understand why she would spend time with the other man, in the studio or out of it. Tommy would often catch glimpses of their conversations, talking about the movie they saw or where Chuck planned to take her to dinner. As soon as their talk began to go in that direction, Tommy would leave the room.

At some point, Jude seemed to catch on the Chuck bothered him, so she seemed to try and keep her interaction with the band member to a minimum around him. Though thankful for it, Tom knew that just because she didn't talk about it in front of him, it didn't mean that Jude wasn't spending time with Chuck outside of the studio.

However, instead of focusing on the time that Jude was spending with Chuck, Tommy busied himself with preparing for the upcoming recording session with Waking Blind. The band was due in an hour, but he was hoping that Jude would come by early to go over the plan for the day.

A few minutes later the board was set up and he was sitting in one of the chairs, waiting to see if Jude would show up. He was startled by a commotion just outside the studio door, and went to investigate. When he opened the door, Tom was confused to see Jude lying on the ground, eyes closed tightly. Spied was sitting next to her, holding one hand, and begging, "Please, Jude. Come on…please? You know you want to…for me…your best friend…please…"

Somewhat worried as to what was going on, Tom asked, "What did you do, Spied?"

The younger man looked up in surprise. "Oh, hey dude."

He began to face Jude again, but Tommy quickly cut him off. "No. First tell me what's going on…then you can continue begging."

Rolling his eyes, Spied looked up to Tom. "Last night, dude and I were hanging out and ended up writing. We put together this killer song, and I want it to be on the album. But, she's refusing."

Tommy listened to the explanation, but knew that there had to be more to it. His girl would never refuse to put a song on an album for no reason, especially if it was as good as Spied seemed to think. Instead of responding to him, Tom turned his gaze towards Jude. "Why don't you want the song on the album?"

Jude finally opened her eyes and looked up to meet his gaze. She didn't respond, and he could almost hear the thoughts racing through her head. There was a glimmer of fear in her eyes that confused him. He waited patiently for her to answer, more curious than ever as to why she didn't want to share the song.

After another long pause, Jude spoke. "It's not that I don't want the song on the album. I just don't want to sing it. The song we wrote is a duet."

Before she could say anything else, her best friend stood and fully faced Tommy, exclaiming, "It might be the best duet ever. I mean, the song is killer, the lyrics are amazing…it's perfect. Seriously, dude, you have to hear it." With that, Spied grabbed the older man's hand and literally pulled him to his guitar sitting in the lobby.

Jude followed them, though Tommy could tell she was reluctant. Once they were all seated, Spied began a melodic strum and Jude began to sing. Her voice was hauntingly beautiful…filled with a depth of emotion that Tommy missed. Five words into the song and he was completely captivated. He sat in a trance as his senses were consumed by the passion of the music and the bearing of her soul.

_Dance me to your beauty with a burning violin  
>Dance me through the panic 'til I'm gathered safely in<br>Lift me like an olive branch and be my homeward dove  
>And dance me to the end of love<br>Yeah, dance me to the end of love_

_Let me see your beauty when the witnesses are gone  
>Let me feel you moving like they do in Babylon<br>Show me slowly what I only know the limits of  
>And dance me to the end of love<br>Dance me to the end of love_

_Dance me to the wedding now  
>Dance me on and on<br>Dance me very tenderly  
>And dance me very long<br>We're both of us beneath our love  
>We're both of us above<br>And dance me to the end of love  
>Won't you dance me to the end of love<em>_1_

Silence. Complete and utter silence. You could have heard a pin drop with how still and quiet the lobby was. Tommy was not able to form a single word he was so taken with the song, but the sound of slow clapping jarred him out of his reverie.

He saw Jude whip her head around to see Darius standing there, and her eyes widened. "D, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to…"

Before she could say another word, the large black man shook his head. "No, Jude. That is nothing to apologize for. What I just heard was pure perfection, and the world needs to hear it."

The normally talkative girl was stunned, not saying a word. After a moment, she turned to face her former boss and asked, "What about my…"

Again, she was interrupted. "Your contract?" Tommy could tell that he was about to say more, but instead looked around, realizing that they were not alone. He took a step back and pointed to the three of them, saying, "Why don't we discuss that in my office."

Jude looked terrified at the prospect of releasing her own music again, and Tommy wanted nothing more than to hold her close and tell her that everything would be okay. But, knowing that they were still on somewhat shaky ground, he instead stood and helped her up. As they walked toward the boss's office, he couldn't help but reach out a hand and give her shoulder a quick rub. As he held open the door for her and Spied, Tommy whispered "It will all be fine," in her ear.

A pair of deep blue eyes looked back at him gratefully before turning back towards Darius. When the three were all seated in his office, he began to speak. "Jude, I know that you walked away from your contract for a reason, but that song needs to be out there. Do you know how well it would sell? Think of the money it would bring in!"

Tommy wasn't surprised by Darius' words, but he knew that was not the way to get Jude to agree to the song, especially if they wanted her to sing it. Thankfully, Darius realized who he was talking to and seemed to change his tactics.

Looking at her intently, their boss asked, "Jude, do you think that song is good?"

She nodded, "Yeah." Looking at her hands in her lap, she quietly elaborated. "To be honest, I think it's one of the best I've written."

Tommy couldn't agree more, but of course, he wouldn't say that. Darius agreed with her statement though, and had no problem telling her. "I do too, Jude. I think it would be a crime not to have that song be heard, and you know that no one will do it justice like you can." Letting his words sink in for a moment, their boss was quiet.

Her best friend was in obvious agreement, as was Tommy. After more silence, they could all see a shift in Jude's posture, and Tommy knew that she was warming to the idea. It was clear that she was still hesitant, but for the sake of the song, she was willing to sing again.

Her head slowly came up, eyes locking with Darius. "Okay, I'll do it." Her voice was barely louder than a whisper, but they had all heard her clearly.

Darius literally jumped from his seat in his excitement, probably thinking of all the money this song would make him. After a mini-celebration, he sat again and his face held a more serious expression. Tommy had an idea that this would be the part of the conversation that Jude would not like. He knew that the song was co-written by Spied, but being honest, it was nowhere close to the sound that SME had. It would be strange to put the duet on the band's album, and it wouldn't get the coverage it deserved being sold solely as a single. Tommy had a feeling that Darius was about to suggest another band to accompany Jude.

His suspicions were confirmed when Darius began talking again. "Now that we have that settled, there is one minor issue."

Spied interrupted before he could get further. "The song isn't going on my album, is it?"

Tommy was mildly surprised—the kid was smarter than he often appeared.

A nod was Darius' first response, but soon his thoughts were relayed. "Unfortunately, the song would be incredibly out of place on your debut album. And, we all know that it won't be played as a single with no album to follow."

Jude's eyes grew wide as Tommy's fears were confirmed. Their boss ignored the reaction of the group, and continued speaking. "It's the perfect fit for Waking Blind's album, and I think you should sing it with them."

After he said his piece, Darius sat back, clearly waiting for a reaction. Jude was the first to speak, timid and almost scared of what she was being asked to do. "But, it's Spied's song too…why can't he sing?"

"Jude, you know that it wouldn't fit on SME's album, and it would be perfect for Waking Blind. The song needs to get out there, and this is the way it can be done. You have a good relationship with the band; you and Spied should play it for them and see how they like it."

Tommy knew it was futile to argue with the man once he had an idea. Apparently Jude knew it too, and slowly stood. Looking first at Darius, then turning to her best friend, she let out a sigh. "If Spied has some time now, we can go over it with the band. If everything goes well, I guess we can record it today."

Before anyone could say anything, Jude left the office. Though he didn't understand the depth of her anxiety, he could tell that she was having a hard time with the whole situation. Had they been back to friendship, or more, as Tommy really wanted, he would have told her that he would sing the duet with her. Regardless of his personal desires, their voices would have blended perfectly and formed a stunning duet. But that was not to be the case.

Tommy followed Spied out of Darius' office and into Studio A, where Waking Blind was getting ready to record. He saw the younger man grab Jude into a hug, and was instantly jealous that he couldn't be there for her like her best friend could. The pair separated after a few moments, and greeted the rest of the band. Tommy could tell they were explaining what happened and what Darius wanted, but he was frustrated when he saw Chuck walk straight to his girl.

He had to look away as the other man held onto her for a few moments, not being able to handle seeing someone else comfort his girl. After a while, they moved apart, but Chuck's arm was still around her, his fingers making circles on her shoulder. Unable to take any more of their contact, Tommy spoke into the studio using the intercom, "You guys want to show them the song?"

Spied nodded and took one of the guitars from the rack. Tommy left the intercom on so that he could hear the music. Again, Spied performed the song with his best friend, her voice resonating with a beautiful passion that was unparalleled. Again, Tommy was in a speechless awe.

They finished the song and all was quiet in Studio A. Waking Blind said nothing, continuing to take in the wonder of the music they had witnessed. Jude was the first to move, attempting to stand from her place on the floor. Chuck moved to help her up and gave her a strange look.

"What did you guys think?" Jude asked, not noticing the particular gaze that Chuck was directing at her.

A chorus of "Amazing" and "Beautiful" were thrown out by the band, but the man next to her didn't say a word. Jude must have realized that he was the only one who didn't respond, and turned to face him. Looking him in the eye, her reaction was evidence that she saw what Tommy did and asked, "What's going on, Chuck?"

He didn't respond right away and looked to the ground. Jude's brow furrowed in confusion at his response and was about to ask again, but Spied chose that moment to speak up, letting the group know that he was leaving. Jude stepped closer to him to give a hug, but Tommy's gaze was trained on Chuck. He had a sinking feeling in regards to the funny look Chuck still had on his face, thinking that the man wanted to sing the duet with Jude.

Being honest, Tom knew that Chuck had a pretty good voice. But the song was about passionate and lasting love, and there was no way he wanted someone singing about that with the girl he was in love with.

His fears were fully realized when he saw Jude turn back to face Chuck, and he blurted out, "Let me sing the song with you."

Jude was obviously surprised, taking a small step backwards as if to gain perspective. But Tommy could feel his heart beginning to crack at the smile that lit her face after a moment. She only had eyes for Chuck as she responded, "Okay…" As if remembering that they weren't alone, Jude glanced around the room and followed up with, "If you guys are okay with it…"

Jack was the first to respond, saying simply, "I think it will be great."

"Yeah, let's do a run through." Riley smiled at the thought and immediately moved towards her bass. Nate only shrugged and got behind his drum kit, bobbing his head to the melody they had just heard.

From his place on the other side of the glass, Tommy looked back to Chuck and Jude, his chest clenching to see them huddled so close together. She was going over lyrics with him, trying to familiarize him with the song before they got started.

A few minutes later, they were ready to begin. After a practice run through the song, Tommy told the group he would record their next take.

They continued to record through the afternoon, only stopping once for a water break. By the end of the day, Tommy was putting final touches on the single, Jude sitting next to him offering her input. Only minutes after finishing the final version, an intern came in the room on Darius' bidding wondering if the song was done and if he could have it. Tom handed off the CD to the kid and turned to face Jude once he left. After looking at her for a moment, he grabbed a hand, unable to resist. "I'm really proud of you, Jude."

She looked back at him, not quite sure how to respond, hesitation evident in her gaze. After a minute or two, she simply responded with a quiet, "Thanks." They sat like that for a few minutes, and Tommy enjoyed just being together—not fighting and not talking about work. Nearly twenty minutes later, they were still sitting, her hand still encased in his.

However, the door banged open and Chuck's head peeked into the room. Immediately, Jude pulled her hand out of Tom's and sat up straight in her seat. He knew it was because of the other man, and that knowledge made him cringe. Jude and Chuck had been together in the studio all day long, flirting and touching all day long. The other man only motioned his head towards the door, and Jude jumped, following him out of the studio.

He sat staring after her for a few moments, even after she had left the building. Tommy didn't even notice when Spied came in the studio and sat next to him. He was only startled out of his reverie when Spied smacked him on the back, saying, "Dude, you have it bad, huh?"

Rolling his eyes at the younger man sitting next to him, Tommy admitted that he may care a bit for Jude by nodding his head. As much as it was true, Tom didn't want to talk about it then. Jude's song was finished, handed off to Darius, and all he wanted to do was sleep. Of course, it would have been much better if Jude was with him they were going back to his place, but he couldn't dwell on that now. Instead, he stood and clapped Spied on the back. "I'll see you later, man.'

The following day Tom walked into G Major, coffee in hand, ready to see his girl. However, when he saw her in the arms of Chuck, his almost-good mood vanished. Silently, he went straight to his office got down to some paperwork. An hour later, a knock on his door was a welcome distraction, and Tom looked up to see Darius. "What's up, D?"

Stepping in, his boss answered, "Well, Tom, radios are already loving Jude's duet with Waking Blind, and it's already made three local TV shows have picked up the song. The public are already clamoring for more, and we are going to do a video for the song."

This wasn't surprising to Tom, from the first moment he heard the song, he knew it was genius. The offer that came out of Darius' mouth was a surprise.

"Do you want to sit in on the meeting?"

Shrugging, Tom said he would and followed his boss to the conference room. An hour later, he was grinding his teeth in frustration, clenching his knuckles, and taking deep breaths. With a song as passionate and raw as _Dance Me to the End of Love_ was, it was obvious to go with a concept that was going to be equally raw and passionate. The only problem was that Darius thought it was a genius idea to have Jude star in the video alongside Chuck.

From a business perspective, Tom understood where their boss was coming from. Being completely objective, the idea of using Jude as the focus of the video and the up and coming Band to be her supporting cast was pretty brilliant. However, being in love with the star of the song and the video, he hated that his girl would be so close to someone that wasn't him.

Even after his stressful meeting, the day was not bound to get better. Tom wanted to do nothing more than escape, but he couldn't. After they finished in the conference room, it was back into Studio A with Jude to clean up her vocals. The whole time she was recording she was reserved, and he could tell that something was going on.

But, being that she hadn't spoken a word to him all day, he couldn't talk to her about it. That night they finally finished things up, and everyone was told to meet back the following day for the actual video shoot. Things were progressing at warp speed, and Tommy wasn't sure how to handle it. Every fiber in his being wanted to run away—escape to somewhere far away from Chuck and his obvious feelings for Jude.

Nonetheless, the video went well. The entire thing was shot in one day, and after only a week on the air, it already held the number one spot at three different music countdown shows. Amidst interviews and press opportunities, he and Jude continued to record Waking Blind's debut album.

SME headed out on their North American tour—something that had been planned for a while. They left only days after the video premiered, and Tom could notice a difference in Jude. She seemed to be even more closed off than normal...closer to how things were when he first came back. As much as Tommy hated it, he _was_ satisfied that Jude wasn't turning to Chuck in Spied's absence.

Only a week after SME left Toronto, Tommy was sitting in the studio waiting, as usual, for Jude. This had become routine for them, meeting to go over the plan for the day before Waking Blind came in. Even though they only spoke of things related to the band's album, it was time that he cherished. However, the band was due to arrive in five minutes, and Jude still wasn't there. Tom began to worry—in the three weeks that they had been doing this, she had always been to the studio at least thirty minutes early.

Another few minutes passed, and the studio door opened. Tom sighed in relief, but was soon disappointed when Riley and Jack entered the room. They looked around, seemingly surprised to not see Jude, but began to set up anyways. Another minute passed and Kwest walked in the room, sending Tommy's worries into overtime. He silently contemplated where he should check for her first when his thoughts were interrupted by the ringing of Kwest's phone.

1 The song is _Dance Me to the End of Love_ written by Leonard Cohen, performed by The Civil Wars.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

Jude was pacing back and forth in the sterile hallway surrounded by white walls. She was a nervous wreck, and the fact that Kwest still wasn't answering his phone was bothersome. This would be the third message she was going to leave. Thankfully, she was saved from that task when her friend and brother-in-law answered, "What's up, Jude?"

"Where have you been?" she literally screamed into the phone.

There was a brief pause where, if Jude wasn't so anxious, she could have pictured the upturned lip and furrowed brow that gave evidence of Kwest's confusion. "Oh!" he exclaimed. "Sorry, my phone was on silent while I was in with D. I just turned it back on. What's up?"

"Um, Sadie and I were at lunch and she started having this weird pain in her side. At first it wasn't a big deal, but then she could barely move. We came straight to the hospital when they started getting worse and now the doctor won't tell me anything, even though I'm her sister."

"What?" Kwest yelled. She could hear noises in the background, and she imagined that he was rushing around the studio.

Not wanting him to drive in his condition, Jude yelled to get his attention. "Kwest!" After no response, she yelled a bit louder, ignoring the glares of the nurses down the hall, "Kwest!"

"Huh..." was the response she received.

"Give the phone to Tommy, Kwest." Not hearing anything, she said it more deliberately, "Kwest! Give the phone to Tom."

She was relieved when the voice of a very confused Tom Quincy came through the phone. "Hello?"

It was clear that he was unsure of what was going on, but Jude didn't dwell on that. She told him what she had told Kwest, but finished by saying, "I need you to bring him to the hospital. I don't want him driving because he's probably frantic right now."

"Of course, Jude. We'll be there soon."

"Oh, thank goodness!" Jude sighed. "We're at St. Michael's, so it should only take you about ten or so minutes. Please hurry..." She let the words hang in the air. As much as she had wanted to be strong, she couldn't hold back her emotion anymore. The idea that something might be wrong with Sadie or the baby was catching up to her, and the adrenaline was starting to wear off. Now she was just plain worried, and she couldn't help the tears that began to fall.

She could hear Tom moving around from the other end of the phone, telling Kwest to get his things and the band to pack up. His calm voice came over the line at her last words, offering a small bit of comfort.

"Jude, don't worry. We'll be there soon, okay? Everything will be fine. Just relax."

He spoke slowly, but had a confidence in his voice that caused Jude to pause. That was what she needed at the moment, his confidence and assurance that it would be okay. "Just hurry..." was all she said before hanging up the phone.

Eight minutes of pacing later and Kwest raced down the hallway, nearly falling over trying to stop when he reached her. "Where is she?"

"They're running some tests right now, but she'll be in room 347 when they finish."

His eyes grew wide at her words, and a loud, "What?" escaped his mouth. "We can't see her right now? Why not?"

Jude tried to put a hand on his shoulder, but his pacing made that impossible. She went back to her seat and put her head in her hands. Only a moment later, she was surprised by a hand that was placed on her back. Immediately, she sat up and looked to her comforter, relieved to see Tommy next to her. Regardless of how awkward and stilted their relationship might be, she needed him at that moment. She almost dove into his arms, and was satisfied when he simply held her.

"Sorry it took me so long," he whispered into her hair. "I let Kwest off as soon as we pulled up, but had to park the car."

Her throat was constricted by the tears, and words would not come, so she only shook her head, trying to convey that he shouldn't worry about it. They sat like that for another ten minutes before Jude was able to get ahold of her emotions, eventually sitting up and trying to wipe evidence of her tears away. "Sorry," she apologized.

Before she could say another word, Tommy shook his head and brought a hand to her face, wiping the trail of tears away with his thumb. "Jude, no. It's okay."

His mouth opened to say something more, but the sight of Sadie's doctor coming down the hallway caused them all to stand. Kwest was the first to ask, "How is she?"

The doctor had a sympathetic smile on his face, somewhat amused by their extreme concern. "First, let me tell you that Sadie is fine." A collective sigh of relief filled the air.

Jude couldn't help hugging Tom, her anxiety alleviated. She felt his body relax, and one arm encircled her shoulders, holding her close. They stayed in that position as Kwest asked what happened.

"Well, Sadie was suffering from Braxton Hicks contractions. They are something that every woman experiences and cause no harm to the baby. Some women don't feel them at all, and some women feel like they are going into labor, but it sounds like Sadie was somewhere in between."

This time Jude spoke up, asking, "So, what do you do about them? I mean, you said they don't hurt the baby, right?"

"No, no," the doctor quickly assured. "The baby is fine, and so is Sadie. We gave her some mild pain-killers and set her up in a room for the night."

Not allowing the doctor to continue, Kwest interrupted. "Why are you keeping her for the night?"

The doctor smiled, "Calm down, Dad. We just want to monitor her and the baby overnight. She's in a private room, and you are welcome to stay the night." Referring to his notes, the doctor finished by telling Kwest, "You can go see her now, room 347."

Without another word, Kwest took off in the direction of his wife's room. The doctor began to walk in the direction he came, but turned back to face Jude and Tommy, who were still holding each other. "You are welcome to visit her, but only one person can stay the night. Sorry." He shrugged his shoulders before continuing down the hall.

Jude made her way back over to the chairs lining the hallway and sat down, a deep sigh escaping her lips. She felt Tommy sit next to her, but she didn't look at him. "I guess we should give Kwest a few minutes, huh?"

"I'm sure they both would appreciate it," was Tom's simple response.

He didn't say anything more, and neither did Jude, both lost in their own thoughts. When she felt enough time had passed, she stood and moved in the direction of Sadie's room. She could feel Tom following her, and they entered her sister's room together. After the four had been talking and visiting for about a half an hour, Kwest stood. "I am so sorry, babe, but I have to get back to work to finish up a few things."

Sadie looked up at her husband and nodded. Grabbing his hand she smiled, "That's okay. You'll still come by after work though, right?"

"Of course. After work I'm going to stop by the house and grab a bag of stuff for both of us. I'll be back around seven or so." Kwest properly said goodbye to his wife by giving her a sound kiss and then exited the room after waving to Jude and Tommy.

Realizing that he was Kwest's ride, Tom quickly stood and kissed Sadie's cheek before offering a hug to Jude. She accepted it gratefully before pulling away. She told him she'd see him later, and he was off. Her eyes followed him out the door, continuing to stare after he was gone.

Sadie's voice broke into her daze, "Jude, what's going on?"

Shaking her head, Jude looked back to her sister and contemplated how to answer. Finally, she shrugged her shoulders, "I don't know."

Knowing that there was something going on, Sadie prompted for more. "Jude..."

Rolling her eyes, Jude answered, "Fine..." After a brief pause, she decided to explain the confusion she had been feeling lately; really, the confusion she had been feeling since Tommy left her so long ago. "To be honest, its the same thing that has been going on since I first met Tom Quincy...we just get each other." Her sister's only response was a knowing nod, and her lack of conversation encouraged Jude to continue. "He left, Sadie. He left me after we had our first date."

Sadie's eyes widened in surprise, Jude never mentioned that fateful date with Tom. Jude knew that she would be surprised, but continued on anyways. "We had a perfect date, and then he left...without a word to me...but he still talked to Kwest and D. He knew that I knew and he didn't care! He didn't trust me enough to tell me what was going on...he didn't care enough to let me in. And what's worse, Sades, is that when he left, I was completely broken. I could barely function...I can still barely function! And then he waltzes back into my life, acting like everything is fine, and I fall for it yet again. It's just so easy to let him in, Sis."

Her words brought her head into her hands which were resting on her knees. Tears again began to form in her eyes, and she felt an ache in her heart. She had tried so hard to not let him in, but it did no good. Here she was wishing that he was hers, and it had only been a few months.

"Maybe you should stop trying to hard to keep him out, Jude." Sadie took one of Jude's hands and held it, trying to sooth her sister through the simple action.

"But what if everything is the same and I get hurt again?" This was truly Jude's biggest fear—that she would let Tom in and she would end up with a broken heart.

"I'm not saying that you shouldn't be careful, but is being friends such a bad thing? You know you're going to be working with him for the rest of Waking Blind's album, not to mention the work you're doing with SME's album. And, if Darius has his way you'll be back at G Major full time singing, or at least producing. Being friends with Tom might be a good thing." She had a look of compassion on her face, something that Jude knew was completely out of love.

She contemplated her sister's words for a few minutes before asking, "But what if I get hurt?"

Sadie smiled a sympathetic smile and answered, "Jude, anyone who has eyes knows that you and Tom have the potential to be something amazing. With that comes the possibility that you might get hurt. But what if something spectacular comes out of it? It doesn't mean that you'll get married and have lots of kids, but maybe something else incredible will come of it. You just have to be open to it."

Again, Jude pondered her Sadie's wisdom. Maybe she was right and there was the potential for something great to happen with Tom. And even if she let him in a little, that didn't mean that they would start dating or something. It would make things easier in the studio, and working on music would be easier if she wasn't always so guarded. "Maybe you're right," was all she confessed.

Not wanting to discuss the topic further, she asked Sadie if there were any changes with the baby. They talked about how the nursery was coming and about the trip Kwest was planning for them once the baby was old enough to be left with someone else.

At one point in their conversation, Sadie unintentionally returned to the "Tommy topic," asking, "Hey, I love that song you recorded with Waking Blind. Who knew Chuck had such a good voice?"

Jude hesitated at the mention of the song, knowing that she couldn't say much without disclosing that the song was about Tom. She decided to go with a generic comment, "Yeah, he sounds good on the record, huh?"

"Good? He sound awesome! The song is beautiful though...did you guys write it together?"

Unconsciously, Jude began to fiddle with her hands, wringing them together. Her thoughts drifted to the song, remembering how it felt to let the deepest desires of her heart fill the pages. But, the attempt to rid herself of the seemingly hopeless feelings was to no avail. Not sure how to respond to Sadie's question, Jude simply told her no.

The look Sadie gave her was intense, making Jude crumble under the pressure. "I, uh...I wrote it with Spied." She said his name quietly, not sure how her sister would respond.

"Spied? But what about Karma? Is he leaving her?"

Her sister clearly hadn't understood, and Jude rolled her eyes. "No, Sadie. Spied helped me write the melody and put the chords together, I wrote the lyrics. Just because he helped write it doesn't mean that its about him." The words came out more harshly than she intended, and as soon as the words left her, Jude clapped a hand on her mouth knowing she said too much.

Ever more curious, Sadie asked, "Then who is it about, Jude?" When Jude didn't say anything, she asked again, "Jude?"

Tears began to form in her eyes yet again, and Jude took a deep breath. If she acknowledged that Sadie's suspicions were correct, that would be one more person who knew how foolish she was being. Even if it was her sister, Jude didn't want anyone to know that buried deep inside her heart, she was still in love with Tom Quincy.

Before she was forced to answer, Kwest appeared at the door, duffel bag in hand. "Hey, baby."

Sadie turned and smiled as she saw her husband, responding with, "Hi, sweetheart. I missed you."

He walked closer to her and gave her a sweet kiss on the lips. "I missed you too. How are you feeling?"

The couple caught up on the last few hours and Jude stood to leave. Watching them interact was a reminder of what she was missing out on. It was like a stab in the gut to see their obvious love for each other, something she so desperately wanted. Reaching the door, she gave a quick wave of her hand and told the pair, "I'll see you guys tomorrow. Sades, get some rest, okay?"

"Will do, little Sis. Love you."

"Love you too. Bye Kwest." She smiled at her brother-in-law as she left, deep in thought of her earlier conversation with Sadie. She decided that there was no time like the present, and instead of heading to her loft, Jude pointed her car in the direction of G Major.

…

Lost in a world far away from the studio, he was startled when the door to the booth opened. Though he had headphones on, the music had stopped a few minutes ago, but Tommy had been too lost in his thoughts to realize it. He turned to the door, thinking it might have been Kwest coming back to grab the hat he left on the chair. But, upon seeing the blonde beauty enter the room, Tommy's eyes grew wide and he couldn't help the smile that lit his face.

He could see that she was thinking about something intently, but instead of letting him in, she smiled at him despite her consternation. "Hey, Tommy. Wanna go over the latest tracks? I was thinking something was off with the intro to _Little Lion Man_."

"Sure," was his immediate response. He knew that she had something on her mind, but rather than ask about it, he picked up the secondary set of headphones and held them out for her.

Jude sat down in a heap and donned the headphones. Together, they worked for the next couple of hours, tweaking the song and adjusting even the smallest measures, making sure it was completely perfect. Eventually they finished _Little Lion Man_, thoroughly satisfied with how things turned out. They listened to it one final time, Tom's heart clenching—as always—at the line "your boldness stands alone among the wreck." The words conjured up a picture of what could happen if he were to push too far with Jude—complete destruction.

That picture only served to remind him that he had to take it slow with her. Right now, he had to rebuild her faith in him, her trust in him. However, Tommy knew that something was bothering Jude, and he wanted to know what it was. After the final notes played from the speakers, Tom turned to his girl and asked the question that had been on his mind since she walked in the room. "What's goin' on, girl?"

The hint of a smile graced her face at the familiar term of endearment, making Tom smile in turn. She looked over at him before answering, "Honestly, I was thinking about Sadie and baby. I mean, I know now that they're fine, but when she couldn't move because she was in so much pain, I was terrified."

"Really?" he asked. He understood why Kwest and Sadie would be torn up—it was their own flesh and blood in danger. But the idea that Jude was so concerned was intriguing to him.

"Yeah. I know it doesn't make a lot of sense to someone like you, but I already love that kid so much...the possibility that something could have happened was nerve-wracking. Besides, Sadie is kind of my only family left. Mom's long gone and dad always seems to be busy. What if something had happened to her?" Merely mentioning that Sadie could have been in danger brought tears to Jude's eyes. After a moment, she seamed to collect herself and spoke again. "That baby is perfect...innocent... He, or she," she added the qualifier quickly, "…deserves the world, I can't imagine losing him so early, before we really got to know him." Again, tears began to pool in her eyes, soon escaping down her cheeks.

Tommy couldn't help himself and pulled her chair close to his. He wrapped his arms around her, encircling her in support and love, even if she didn't feel the latter. Seeing her cry was the definition of beautiful brokenness, but it tore him apart. He wanted nothing more than to take away her pain.

He didn't know how long they had been sitting like that, but it didn't matter. There was a sense of loss when she moved back to her own chair, taking a deep breath as if to clear her head. She wiped her face to get rid of the tear stains and then turned to face him. In that gaze, Tommy could see her embarrassment, highlighted by the pink tinge to her cheeks. It was as if she was fighting within her mind to run away or stay; the way her hands were gripping the arms of the chair made him worry that she would bolt. He was overjoyed when she forcefully put her hands in her lap and smiled at him. A quiet, "Thank you," escaped her lips as she looked down.

Before he could tell her that it was no problem and he would always be there for her, she caught his eyes again. "Tommy, I want to apologize. I haven't been fair to you, and for that, I'm sorry."

He wasn't sure what to say, not wanting Jude's words to be a dream. Tentatively, he asked, "What do you mean?"

"I guess I mean that I would like us to be friends again. Regardless of how I felt when you left, we were always close, and I miss your friendship. I've been kind of harsh with you, and I feel bad. It wasn't fair to you."

"Girl, I would love to be friends with you again. I know I told you before, but I missed you so much while I was gone." This conversation was what Tom had been hoping for since he left. The moment he got on that plane, he knew that he would be lucky if she ever spoke to him, yet here she was offering friendship. "I will always be here for you...know that." He grabbed her hands, holding them tightly, wanting her to understand how true those words were.

She smiled at him with a small sparkle in her eyes. "I know, and I'm grateful." Jude gave his hands a light squeeze before continuing, "I'm not gonna lie and say that everything is fine. I was pretty broken when you left, and I was so hurt when you didn't tell me what was going on. But despite that, I did miss you. I want to move on with our lives."

Tommy was torn between sadness at the hurt he caused Jude and joy at the desire to move forward. Rather than focusing on the hurt he made her experience, Tom smiled and told her, "I would love that." He was content simply staring at her, completely embracing being with her at that moment.

His reverie was broken when he heard her voice. "So, the album is coming together."

Tommy couldn't help but chuckle at the obvious change of subject. "I think it's going to be huge. You did an amazing job with them." He couldn't help the complement rolling off his lips.

Her blush intensified, much to the satisfaction of Tommy. He may not have meant to make her blush, but he certainly enjoyed the effects his words had. Their conversation continued for a bit longer, but soon Jude cited the long and emotional day as reason for her need of sleep. She stood to leave, first giving him a hug.

Being in her embrace was pure perfection, and he held on longer than necessary. Jude seemed to fit perfectly with him, and the way her head tucked into his neck was like heaven. Tommy finally released her, waving goodbye in a daze as she walked out of the studio.

The rest of his night passed quickly, largely because he was in a bit of a fog. The next day, Tommy was sitting in the studio, very much in the same position from the night before. All night he had been thinking about how amazing his conversation with Jude had been. He was thrilled that they were moving forward and making an effort to be friends. But there was one comment he couldn't stop dwelling on. When talking about the baby, she told him that he wouldn't understand why she had been so broken up. And in a way, he couldn't.

When talking with Kwest, Tommy didn't understand how his best friend could be so attached to someone that was somewhat insignificant. Not that he wasn't excited about Kwest's kid, but the baby wasn't even born yet. How could you be so in love with someone so small?

Even Jude was completely captivated by this unborn child, something Tommy was still trying to understand. He acknowledged that he would be happy to be a dad someday, but now he was questioning whether or not he would be a good dad. If he was this confused about the love that his best friends shared for this baby, maybe he wasn't meant to be a father.

That thought scared him, so Tommy tried to think of what it would be like to have a kid.

Not surprisingly, when he thought about his future and having babies and raising children, everything seemed to be a blur. But, in the midst of a foggy picture of his future, Jude was the only part that was clear. He knew that, with her by his side, he could be a good dad. He would love the babies that they created together, because they would be a part of both of them.

The haze in his mind cleared, and pictures of mini-Judes and mini-Tommys began to take over. The opening of the studio door startled him, but instantly, his lips turned up at the sight of her, and he had to restrain himself from leaping up. Instead, Tommy nodded his head at her, before asking, "What's shakin', Harrison?"

A giggle escaped her throat at his greeting, making it all the more worthwhile for him. Tommy patted the chair next to him, motioning for her to sit down. Once she was seated next to him, he turned to face her, more seriously asking, "Where are we starting today?

The pair worked on a few things before the band came in, making sure that their efforts the night before were perfect. Soon, they were joined by the members of Waking Blind. The band was just getting back from lunch and ready to get started on their next song. As they all moved to find a seat in the sound booth, Tommy noticed that Chuck made his way over to Jude. Sitting next to her, he pulled out a small white bag from his satchel. Curiosity overtook her, and she opened the small package, smiling in delight when she discovered the black and white cookie that was waiting for her.

Jealousy came over him as Tommy watched on. He hated that Chuck was on the receiving end of Jude's breathtaking smile. He hated that she let Chuck get so close, when he was just starting to rebuild their friendship.

Trying to center himself, Tommy took a deep breath and cleared his throat to get the recording session started. He had to be confident in their friendship, even if he wished there was more. He knew that coming on too strong to Jude would only send her running in the opposite direction, and that was the last thing he wanted. Trying to be content with where their relationship was at the moment, he continued to speak to the band, giving them a bit of direction before they went in to make more music.

And so it went for another month. Tommy reveled in their growing closeness, embracing each moment he spent with Jude outside of the studio. At least four nights a week they would be in the studio until all hours, tweaking the minute details of the songs Waking Blind was recording. Usually those were the days that he would take her to lunch, enjoying their renewed friendship, often talking the afternoon away.

Of course, Jude's closeness with Chuck made things not quite so perfect. As much as he wanted Jude to only be his girl, that was unrealistic for now. Making things even more frustrating was the fact that the single she recorded with the band was still at number 1 in most of the major charts. _Dance Me to the End of Love_ was a hit, and the video only heightened its popularity. He still hadn't been able to figure out her inspiration for the song, and he could only hope that the member of Waking Blind was not it.

But, rather than focus on the friendship Jude had with Chuck, Tom brought himself back to the present and the beautiful woman who was by his side. It was another long day, and they were only part of the way through the newest Waking Blind song. They had been fooling around all evening, making jokes, being silly, and simply enjoying each others company. It was already ten o'clock, Tommy knew that they would be there another few hours.

Embracing the moments he was sharing with Jude, they focused themselves and got back to work. It was around one that morning when they finished, satisfied with how the song had turned out. After cleaning up the booth and turning off the equipment, the pair left the building, him walking Jude to her car. Their conversation had continued all night, and the walk to her car was no different. In their exhaustion, words were slurred and laughter was easy.

Telling him that she would see him later that day, Jude pulled out her key and unlocked her car. Before she had the chance, Tom grabbed her handle and opened the door for her. The smile she gave him made his insides warm, regardless of how sappy that made him seem.

"Thanks for tonight, Tommy. I was in desperate need of some laughter."

"You know I'm always good for a few laughs," he responded with a smile. He couldn't help it, Jude just made him so happy.

He gave her a hug, and, as usual, held on a bit longer than necessary. Thankfully, Jude didn't seem to mind, holding him close in her embrace. Much to his chagrin, they eventually separated. He leaned in and gave her a sweet kiss, savoring the taste of her lips. Pulling apart once again, Tommy opened the door for her, and shut it once she sat in the driver's seat.

He watched her pull out of the spot and drive out of the parking lot, his eyes following her the whole way out. It wasn't until he couldn't see her car anymore that he realized that he kissed her. Not only did he kiss her, but he kissed her on the lips. It was no wonder his lips were still tingling—the after-effects of being in contact with her perfect mouth was intoxicating.

Before he knew it, Tommy had been standing there another ten minutes, completely lost in the memories of her perfect lips and how they moved against his. They were soft and full, but firm and persistent at the same time. Regardless of how much he loved kissing her, Tom knew that it was wrong. He went too far and overstepped the bounds of the tentative friendship they were developing. But, he knew that their growing friendship was the very reason he ended up kissing her.

They had fallen back into a routine—in sync both in and out of the studio. They were starting to open up to each other and often talked about things that had nothing to do with music or G Major. Tommy severely hoped that he hadn't just ruined everything between them. Reluctantly, he got into his car and sped home, needing a hot shower to help clear his mind before sleep overtook him.

The following day found Tom nervous as hell. He couldn't wait for Jude to come in so that he could apologize for his mistake—not that he would ever truly consider kissing her a mistake. After what seemed like hours, but was only about fifteen minutes, Jude came in the main doors. She looked determined, eyes focused and steps purposeful. The combination of those two things were a huge turn on for him, but he pushed that train of thought down in order to maintain the "friend" status.

Standing in the doorway of his office, he called out to her, "Jude! Come here for a sec?"

She seemed slightly startled to hear her voice across the lobby, but turned in his direction nonetheless. With her long strides she made it to him quickly, walking ahead of him to sit on the couch in his office.

Before she was able to even open her mouth, Tommy began to speak. "Jude, I want to apologize for last night. I know that I overstepped the boundary of being friends, and I'm sorry for that. I crossed the line and you need to know that it won't happen again." He paused briefly, but couldn't pass up the opportunity to make her blush, "...unless you want it to, of course."

Thankfully, she took his words as a joke and was not mad; but Tommy was thrilled to see a hint of pink shade her cheeks. Getting back to his apology, he continued. "Jude, I really cherish your friendship, and I hope that I didn't ruin everything we've built up lately."

A sincere smile graced her face, and Tommy swore that he could see a glimmer of the love that used to be there in her eyes. "Tommy...don't worry. I get it."

His name sounded more immaculate than it did coming off of her lips. But, rather than getting lost in that, he focused his attentions back on what she was saying.

"We have a lot of history between us, and I think we may have gotten caught up in the emotions. It was late and we were both tired, and it's easy to get swept away in what could have been. I cherish your friendship too, and I'm not going to let what happened last night ruin how far we've come."

She stood and, while he was still processing what she had said, she came over to him and hugged him. Realizing what she was doing, Tommy immediately wrapped his arms around his girl and held her close. It didn't matter that he had just apologized for crossing the line, she felt too good in his arms to let her go after a "friendly" amount of time had passed. On the outside he hid his excitement that she didn't break their embrace, but on the inside he was nearly jumping for joy.

Moments like this made Tommy think that there was a hope for their future. Maybe things would even progress sooner rather than later.

Eventually, they separated. Jude stuck her hand out and asked, "Friends?"

To which Tommy responded with, "Always." They shook, and it was as if their friendship was official. With things back to normal, Jude turned to leave, explaining that it was time for her to call Spied. Tommy waved her out, knowing how important her weekly phone call with her best friend was.

Because Spied was on tour with SME, Jude had been feeling a bit lonely. Since he left a month ago, they had agreed to have a weekly check-up to make sure the other was doing alright. Her laughter drifted down the hallway and into his office, and Tommy couldn't help but grin at the sound. Her giggles were musical, and he was reminded of how thankful he was that she had Spied. He was glad that while he was gone, she had someone to take care of her.

But, now that he was back, he would be taking care of her. Thinking back to their conversation, Tommy was satisfied with how things had turned out. First, he and Jude were still friends after what could have been a disaster. Then there was the hug that lasted longer than it should have, and last there was the look in her eyes. The look that said she might still care for him more than as a friend. The look that told him there was hope for more in the future.

Those thoughts sparked something in him, and he frantically searched for paper and something to write with. Shuffling through his desk, Tommy landed on a green pen and some spreadsheets he had been given at the last staff meeting. Satisfied, he turned the paper over to write on the back. Once the green scrawl began to fill the page, he smirked. The pen had to be from Jude—she had a strange fascination with writing lyrics in different colors.

Having gotten out the immediate thoughts that were flooding his mind, Tommy took a deep breath. His eyes landed on his journal that was peeking out from the bottom of the pillow on his couch and he stood to grab the item. He had always been particular, especially with his music, and this was no different. Opening the book to the next blank page, he transferred the lyrics and notes he had already transcribed.

Going over to his guitar, Tommy grabbed the instrument and sat on the floor. For the next hour, he continued to work on the song, refining lyrics and melody. As he was playing the first verse once through, he could feel a set of eyes on him. Innately, he knew that they belonged to his girl, and once he finished the verse, he looked up and met her eyes.

"That was beautiful, Tom."

It was as if her words caressed his soul, honest and sincere. Smiling back at her, his head tilted to take her in. "Thanks. It kind of came to me and I needed to get it out, ya know?"

"Oh, I know alright. Is that all you have so far?"

Instead of simply agreeing, Tommy figured her input would be valuable. "Come take a look."

With no hesitation, she walked toward him and sat next to him. She grabbed his journal, pulling it closer so she could see. "Play it for me?"

He complied and began to strum. After a few seconds his eyes closed, and Tommy began to sing. Letting the words pour out of him, he sang the first verse for her.

_You can change the color of your hair,  
>It's not the way your move your hips,<br>Though I can't help but stare.  
>You are a mystery to me.<em>

She continued reading what he wrote and seemed to be in a daze, though he wasn't sure if she was mesmerized by the lyrics or the song as a whole. He hoped it was the lyrics; they were about her, after all. Of course, he hadn't realized that the song was about her, but it did not come as a surprise. He was fine with being friends, but he couldn't help what was in his heart—no matter how cheesy it made him sound. She still hadn't said a word, and Tommy was starting to wonder if maybe she just wasn't sure how to tell him that the song sucked.

A few more moments of silence later, Jude opened her eyes and looked at him. Catching his eyes, she simply told him,

"Wow." She paused, then said it again, "Wow."

Tommy was beyond glad that she like the song, and he hoped that his smile conveyed his appreciation. "I take it that you like it?"

Playfully rolling her eyes, Jude smacked him on the arm before responding, "Yes, dumbass, I like it." Taking the guitar that was still in his lap, she began to strum the chords he had written down, changing the tempo slightly. "What if you did this?"

He listened to her play, imagining how it would sound with the words. Deciding that it had potential, Tom told her to play it again. When she began, he started to sing to the faster beat. Once the verse was done, a wide smile came across his face.

"Jude, that was perfect—totally what the song needed!"

He continued to smile at her, their eyes locked. He wanted so badly to lean in and kiss her, but he restrained that desire. Minutes later they were still lost in each others eyes, but a slight cough interrupted them.

Jude looked up, but Tommy's gaze didn't leave her face. In that moment, he nearly gave in and kissed her senseless. In some ways he was glad for the interruption, but it didn't change the spell she seemed to cast over him. She captivated him without even trying.

Though his eyes still hadn't left her, he felt her body stiffen next to him. It was then that he realized he didn't know who had interrupted them. Looking up, he was stunned. He never expected to see her again...he hoped to never see her again. Speechless, he could only stare at the Amazon-like woman with hungry eyes focused on him, wishing he could make her disappear.

But, sensing his girl's awkwardness, Tommy quickly turned his head back to face Jude. She had a funny look in her eyes, then abruptly standing up. Mumbling, she said, "I'll uh...I'll see you later, Tom."

She literally raced out of his office, and he knew that there would need to for an explanation. His eyes followed her out the door, wanting to race after her, but knowing that the woman in front of him had to be dealt with too. With a deep sigh, Tommy faced the unfortunate intrusion, and simply asked, "What do you want, Anna?"


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

She wasn't sure what to think. Anger wasn't justified, it wasn't like Tommy did anything wrong. She couldn't be sad because she hadn't lost anything. And she shouldn't be heartbroken—Tommy and her were just friends.

Nonetheless, Jude's head was completely muddled. More, she was upset for letting herself fall for Tommy yet again. She knew as soon as she saw him four months ago that it would happen, but she was surprised at how quickly things had gone down hill. Only a month ago she had allowed herself to get comfortable with him, and that had been a mistake.

The moment she let him in was the start of her demise.

Pulling up to her childhood home, now her sister and brother-in-law's place, Jude tried to clear her mind. If she was being rational, she would hold off on her judgment of the unknown woman. She would wait to hear Tommy's explanation and trust what he had to say. _Just__be__rational...just__be__rational_ was her mantra as she entered the house for the planned family dinner.

"Jude!" her sister's voice rang through the house. Not ten seconds later, Sadie appeared through the hallway, obviously having been in the kitchen. "I was starting to wonder if you were going to bail on us..." she suggested, wiggling her eyebrows.

She couldn't help but smile at her sister's comment. "I wouldn't dream of it, Sadie." Jude walked closer and hugged her sister, pulling away after a moment to pat the bulging belly. "And how is baby doing today?"

Putting a hand on her swollen stomach, Sadie sighed. "Just fine...moving around a ton, though. We will certainly have our hands full when she's born."

Smirking at her sister's subtle comment, Jude asked, "She, huh? Convinced its a girl?"

Sadie turned to head back into the kitchen, though Jude knew it was to hide the sheepish grin that would be covering her face at the moment. "It has to be a girl—think of all the dresses she can wear and the cute bows we'll put in her hair."

Letting the comment go, Jude followed her into the kitchen. The pair continued to talk about their day, Jude filling Sadie in on all of the G Major gossip. Not long after, Kwest walked in the door. He kissed his wife hello before going upstairs to change.

Seeing the interaction her sister and friend shared caused her mind to turn back to her handsome man in the studio. Already, she missed him. She craved his closeness, and she would love to have him greet her the way Kwest greeted Sadie every day. She couldn't hide the lost look that had settled on her features or the dazed state she found herself in.

A hand landed on her back and begin to rub back and forth in a gentle manner, completely surprising Jude. Looking up quickly, she was brought back to her former kitchen and remembered that she was there for some dinner and quality time with her sister.

Before she was able to say anything, Sadie spoke up. "Don't try to pretend that I didn't just see a lost little girl sitting at the counter. What's going on, Sis?"

She was quiet for a moment, not sure what to say and where to start. Realizing that it didn't really matter where she started, it would all come out anyways, Jude opened her mouth to speak. "Honestly, Sis? I can't hate him." With her confession, Jude put her head in her hands and tried to suppress the emotions that were on the verge of overflowing. Granted, she wasn't being completely honest, because if she was, Jude would have said that she is still in love with Tommy.

She could feel Sadie's eyes on her, but thankfully, her sister didn't say anything. After a few minutes spent wallowing in her confusion, Jude looked up again, immediately meeting her sister's gaze. "I tried so hard to not let myself fall, but it's too hard. He is my weakness. He has this way of burrowing into my heart...and I know that sounds ridiculous and cheesy, but it's true!" There was no holding back at that point, and the tears began to fall.

Sadie took a seat next to her and held her close as the tears continued to come down. When had she become an overly emotional woman who would cry at the drop of a hat? When had she been reduced to tears at the mere thought of Tom Quincy?

Some time passed and the tears began to subside. When she appeared to have a hold on herself, Jude again looked up. She looked out the window, trying to move past the moment of weakness. Not surprisingly, though, Sadie wouldn't let it go that easy. "Jude, don't hate me, but maybe that isn't such a bad thing."

Shocked by her sister's words, Jude looked at her with wide eyes. "What are you saying?" In the past, Sadie was the one telling Jude to move on, Tom Quincy wasn't worth her tears or emotions.

"Look, I'm not saying that you should tell Tom that you love him or something; I'm just saying that if your feelings have been this persistent, maybe there is something more to them."

As she finished speaking, Kwest walked in the room. "Are we talking about Jude's feelings for Tom?" he asked.

Irritated at her brother-in-law, Jude rolled her eyes and stuck her tongue out at him. But, before she was able to respond, Sadie spoke up, "Maybe..." She stood and kissed him before going to the stove, explaining the situation to Kwest as she worked. "Jude doesn't hate Tom because he is worming his way back into her life and her heart."

A nod of his head was the only response Kwest gave, but after a minute he asked, "So what did Tom do this time?"

Not sure what he was asking, Jude questioned, "What do you mean?"

Taking a seat beside her, Kwest explained. "Its been four months. Sooner or later you were bound to fall. I was just wondering what triggered it this time."

Understanding what he meant, Jude nodded her head. "Uh...last night he...we...we kissed last night."

With her words, Sadie turned and let out a shriek. "What?" She hit Jude on the arm and then asked, "Why am I only finding out about this now?"

Rolling her eyes again at her sister's dramatics, Jude shrugged her shoulders. "It was late last night and I didn't want to wake you. Besides, we talked about it this morning and we're fine. Tom didn't mean it and apologized."

A few moments of silence passed as her sister and brother-in-law contemplated what they just heard. Kwest was the one to speak first, but his question surprised Jude.

"How do you know Tom didn't mean it?"

"He couldn't have. He apologized and said that he didn't want to ruin our friendship because he crossed a line."

"Are you sure that was what he meant, though?" Kwest asked.

Deciding to be honest, Jude shook her head. "No. But if I think he meant more, I start to hope that something more will happen. And if I hope that, I'm setting myself up for disaster."

Her sister turned off the stove top and leaned against the counter facing her. Fully engaged in the conversation, she asked, "What do you mean?"

Looking at her hands, Jude justified her earlier comment. "Last time I let myself think that there was more to Tommy and I than friendship, he left. Not only did he leave, but he left without a word for a year-and-a-half." At the memories of previous events, Jude's throat began to close with the pent up emotion. It was hard to recall those events without getting choked up. "I was heartbroken when he was gone...you know how much he meant to me." The last part was spoken as a whisper. Jude knew it was true, but it was still hard to admit.

Putting a hand over hers, Sadie's eyes were soft, and her tone gentle. "Jude, we know how much it hurt when Tom left. But you can't be scared forever. Maybe the best thing would be to let him in a little bit...take it slow."

Pondering that idea, Jude was quiet. After a few moments, she asked, "What if he doesn't feel the same way? What if it was all a joke?"

Kwest shook his head at her words. "Jude, if there was one thing that Tom Quincy would never joke about, it's his feelings for you. Anyone with eyes would know that he cares about you."

"You don't know that. Even if he does, what if it all falls apart?" That was the real fear she felt. Tom Quincy would always be her weakness, and he would always be the one who could break her heart. Seeing the beautiful woman earlier hadn't settled her fears any, and now Jude was feeling more uncertain by the moment.

"You can't guarantee that your heart won't ever get broken, Jude."

Regardless of the truth to her sister's words, Jude wasn't convinced. "But what if it hurts?" she asked.

This time, Sadie's response was somewhat encouraging. "And what if it turns out to be amazing?"

A smile began to form on Jude's face, and she told the couple about her afternoon. "Before I came over, Tommy and I were working on a song in his office. It was only the first verse, but I think it is going to be pretty amazing. You guys will have to hear it when its done."

Ever the producer, Kwest was the first to respond. "Yeah? Who did you write it for?"

"Actually, Tommy wrote it."

"Really? Tom's writing again?"

Jude thought that Kwest should know better, and told him accordingly. "He's always writing." Her brow quirked as she asked, "Didn't you know? I mean, I know he doesn't show a ton of people, but what else would that leather book he always carries around be for?"

Her brother-in-law had a funny look on his face, causing Jude to ask him what was going on.

Speaking slowly and somewhat uncertainly, he answered, telling her, "Jude, Tommy's never shown anyone his stuff before. After the _Frozen_ debacle, he was too nervous to show anyone, even me."

This was surprising to Jude. Tommy had always showed her the music he was working on. The confusion was obvious on her face, and Kwest affirmed what he told her before. "Jude, I didn't know he wrote his own stuff. I knew he still fiddled around enough to help out his artists, but that's it. If he showed you something he wrote, that means something."

"Really?" she asked. Maybe it did mean something that Tommy showed her his music. "So you don't think I'm being naive if I let him in again?" If her sister and brother-in-law didn't think so, maybe it wouldn't be such a bad thing after all.

"No. I actually think it's a good thing. Since you guys have started being friends again, I haven't seen that sadness in your eyes so much." Sadie's words brought a tinge to her cheeks, betraying the slight giddiness she felt.

At the prospect of getting closer to Tommy, and the knowledge that he made her more happy, Jude smiled. The three had dinner, Sadie sharing how the baby was doing, Kwest explaining further plans for the nursery. As soon as they had finished cleaning the dishes, she picked up her bag. "Guys, I think I'm gonna head out. I have to run by the studio before heading home."

Mention of the studio made Jude think about why she left the studio earlier that evening. Her face fell at the memory of the beautiful woman who had interrupted her moment with Tommy. Her shoulders slumped, and her hand stopped mid-air as it was reaching for her bag. Seeing her pause, Sadie asked, "Jude, what's wrong? I thought you were all good now?"

Snapping out of her trance, Jude looked over at her sister. "You really think that Tommy might have some feelings for me?"

Kwest spoke up, trying to reassure her. "Jude, I don't think he ever stopped having feelings for you."

"So you don't think that a beautiful Amazon of a woman would be more attractive to him?" What if he liked that woman more?

Her brother-in-law was about to answer but stopped after opening his mouth. "What do you mean, 'beautiful Amazon'?"

Sadie slapped his shoulder, assuming he found the thought of another woman so monumental.

Putting his hand up, he told Sadie, "No! Not like that!" Turning back to Jude, he raised his eyebrows, clearly expecting an answer.

Now self-conscious, Jude explained about the beautiful woman she had seen. She told them that Tommy hadn't seemed thrilled with her arrival, but he didn't say much so it was hard to tell. Once she finished, she looked to Kwest and asked, "What do you think?"

The smile on his face made her worry a bit less, but his words reassured her further. "Jude, Anna is someone from Tommy's past. He don't consider her anything more than a lapse in judgment...a mistake. Trust me, you don't have anything to worry about with her."

A smile on her face, Jude simply said, "Oh. Well, in that case, I'll see you guys later. Have a good night." She hugged each of them goodbye and was on her way, yelling "Thanks for dinner!" as she got in her car.

Before heading home, Jude made a few turns in order to end up at the studio. Pulling into the lot behind G Major, she smiled seeing Tommy's car. She wasn't surprised that he was still there—he always wanted to make sure things were as close to perfect as possible before leaving.

Sneaking in the back door, Jude went straight to Studio A. She grabbed her papers quickly, and was about to leave when she decided to say goodbye to Tom. The light was still on in his office, so she walked in that direction. Making a quick detour, Jude left her papers on the lobby table, along with the songs that Spied had wanted her to listen to and her bag. His door was open, but just as she was about to say something, she caught a glimpse inside the lit room.

Feeling her heart drop, Jude could not seem to tear her gaze away from the pair. Immediately, tears began to form as her eyes stayed glued on Tommy. He was sucking the face off the beautiful woman who had interrupted them earlier. His hands were firmly grabbing the Amazon's hips, and she was moving her fingers through his hair.

Not knowing what to do, Jude was frozen in place. Her head was screaming at her to run, but it was as if her feet were like blocks on concrete, too heavy to move. Her heart was breaking at the sight, pieces crumbling with each microsecond that passed. While it felt like hours that she had been standing there, she knew that it couldn't really be more than a few seconds at most.

The pair in the office seemed to be enjoying themselves with no signs of stopping any time soon. Eventually, her feet were able to break free, and Jude turned, running out of the building. She was barely able to grab her purse before going through the front door, not caring that it would slam and betray her presence there.

Hands shaking frantically, she had a hard time holding on to her keys, let alone opening the car door. Once inside, she could barely see out the front window because the tears were so continuous. In a moment of clarity, she caught a glimpse of the clock on her dash, realizing that she had only been in the studio for a total of about four minutes. After talking with her sister and Kwest, Jude held some hope that there might be a future for her and Tommy.

Her heart shattered at the sight of Tommy and the girl—Anna, Kwest had called her. Almost more upsetting than the image that was now burned in her mind was the lack of surprise she felt. It was as if her heart was being torn out of her chest, and she was quickly becoming numb.

Not sure how long she had been sitting in the car, Jude nearly jumped out of her seat when there was a knock on her window. Looking to her left, she was confused to see Chuck's face on the other side. She felt unable to process what was going on, and when her car door opened and Chuck shuffled her to the passenger seat, she moved willingly.

Wet drops continued to fall, the trail of tears forming abstract patterns on her face. Numbness continued to take over, and Jude didn't even flinch when her car companion reached over her to buckle her into the seat. He put the car in gear and backed out of the spot she had parked in, not ceasing to hold her hand. Though no coherent words were spoken, he simply rubbed her knuckles and whispered to her, "It's okay, honey. Just breathe, Jude. Just breathe...it's okay."


	7. Chapter 7

**First, I want to take a moment to say thank you to a few of you...**

**Samara04, ScottVillemaire, Nippci, and shleyshine... Thank you so much for your comments and reviews! You guys seriously rock for taking a moment to send a reply. **

**Chapter 7**

The slamming of a door startled him enough to detach his lips from the beautiful woman in front of him. However, when he opened his eyes, Tom was disappointed to not see his favorite blonde, rather, it was Anna in front of him—somewhat of a mistake from his time in Montana.

Moving away from Anna, he went to look in the lobby for evidence of who might have been in the studio. Most employees were usually gone by seven, eight at the latest, because they all had lives. Tommy knew that he had locked the front and back door when he left earlier, so whoever interrupted them had to have a key.

Making a mental list of everyone who held a key, Tommy was at a loss. But, he remembered the Darius had given Jude a key in hopes that she might get inspired and want to record something. His fear was verified when he saw a stack of papers on the lobby table, along with a CD with her name clearly labeling the front of the disc.

Realizing the full impact of what his girl had just witnessed, Tommy began to panic. He immediately turned to the woman who was still in his office, sitting on his desk, and told her to leave.

"But why, baby?" She stood and walked over to him, placing a hand on his shoulder. Caressing it softly, she asked, "I think we were having a great time; what's the matter?"

Intentionally stepping back out of her reach, Tom glared. "This was a mistake, I'm sorry. But you still need to go."

Ever the classy girl, Anna simply smiled. Her response threw him off a bit, not sure how to react, but her words confused him even more. "Tommy, babe...if you want me to leave, I will. I'll be in town for the rest of the week, so just give me a call when you want to catch up."

The last two words were spoken in a low voice, an attempt to be seductive, no doubt. Despite her attempts, the efforts had no affect on Tom. A sense of guilt continued to overtake him, making it almost unbearable to even look at the person in front of him. He knew his words were harsh, but Tommy couldn't help it. His only thought was of finding Jude and apologizing. It was that or figuring out how to turn back time.

"Anna, we won't be seeing each other again. Have a nice night."

The girl was obviously startled, but moved toward the front door nonetheless. As she was about to open it, some sense of decency came over him and Tom asked, "Do you need a cab?"

When she shook her head, Tommy turned and went to his desk. Sitting down, his head found its way to his hands, and he was consumed by anxiety for what was to come. His mistake had been letting Jude walk out the door when Anna interrupted them. He knew that his girl had felt out of place, but that was the opportunity he had been looking for to show her how much he loved her.

Instead, he allowed her to leave, and he was talked into dinner with the girl of his past. During his time in Montana, Tom was somewhat of a mess. Thankfully, most of his energy and thoughts were consumed with Maya, but the remainder was focused solely on thoughts of his girl. About six months into his stay, he began to feel like he was drowning. Kim had just finished detoxing for the first time and was refusing to go to rehab. Maya was constantly fussing—understandable given the situation she was in. And Darius was calling nonstop, trying to help, but only frustrating things further.

One night, he made the mistake of going to a bar. Of course, Tommy had known from the start that it was a dumb decision, but all he wanted was to forget. That was the night he met Anna. He thought she was beautiful, but looking back, it was because she was blonde and reminded him of Jude. She was a model, in Montana for a photo shoot. Typical of groupies from back in the day, she flattered him constantly and was a listening ear to his stories of Jude.

She matched him cocktail for cocktail, shot for shot, and eventually, both were so drunk they could barely walk upright. While she was likely only hoping to snag him for the night, he was trying to distance himself from memories of his girl. But, during the entire night with Anna, Tom had felt like he was cheating on Jude, spurring him to drink more as a way to forget. When the alcohol didn't completely tear Jude from his thoughts, Tom took Anna to a hotel and began to seduce her. Using the tricks from his past—chocolate covered strawberries and champagne—he baited her into bed. The next morning, Tommy woke up with a hangover from hell and a blonde woman laying next to him. Unfortunately, it wasn't the blonde woman he hoped for and dreamed about, and he began to fully realize his mistake. He was left with regret, something he was unfamiliar with.

If he wasn't sure before, Tommy knew that morning that he loved Jude. Never before had he cared about the effects his actions would have on someone else, but now that he had Jude, things were different. That same morning, he had bought a ticket to go back to Toronto. He wasn't sure if he could stay in Montana without her, and he wanted nothing more than to have her by his side. There was a sense of loss that he was unfamiliar with—like part of him was missing.

With a mind to go pack up his things, Tommy's plans changed the moment he saw Maya. He knew he couldn't leave her—she was his responsibility then. With a heavy heart, he decided to not leave, and instead focused all of his attention on the girl.

Until tonight, Tommy hadn't strayed at all—never having thoughts of another woman. His heart was with Jude, and that was it. Of course, even with Anna, his thoughts and his heart had been with Jude the entire time.

When Anna showed up, there was a possibility for things to end badly. When he agreed to go to dinner with her, disaster was inevitable. He knew that he should have told her no, but Tommy thought he could be strong. And really, he was strong. They had gone to dinner at the cafe down the street from the studio, having light conversation through the course of their meal. Tommy was surprised at how much he enjoyed the meal and her company—it was nice how easy things were.

For the past four months, he had been trying to prove to Jude how much he cared, seemingly to no avail. Sure, the last month had been alright since they agreed to be friends, but it was still a challenge. Tommy was stuck somewhere between not showing too much affection and showing enough to make sure Jude knew he cared. Things with Anna that night had been easy.

She made it no secret that she wanted him, openly flirting with him and making sure to touch him every chance she could. Tommy had been strong throughout their dinner, and even walking her back to the studio hadn't been a problem. However, when they got into his office, things had truly gone downhill.

Tommy had been ready to say goodbye, even going to open the door for her. Taking the opportunity presented before her, Anna had snuck in between him and the door and kissed him. It was brief and simple, but Tommy was startled and hadn't known what to do. After a moment, she leaned in again and captured his lips, and this time Tommy kissed her back.

He wasn't proud of his actions. In fact, he was somewhat sickened by his own weakness. Over a year ago, Tommy decided that Jude was it for him. He knew that there would never be another woman that understood him like she did—that cared for him and believed in him like she did.

When Anna kissed him the second time, Tommy's thoughts had been on Jude, imagining that it was her in front of him. But, it didn't change the wrongness of his actions. Though the entire kiss didn't last more than ten or fifteen seconds, he screwed up, and once again, he didn't know if there was any hope for a future with them.

After sulking in the dark for at least thirty minutes, Tommy just wanted to get out of the studio. He grabbed his keys and left the building in a rush. After coming to terms with what he had just done, he wanted to rid himself of any scent or feeling Anna left on him. Reaching his apartment in record time, Tommy started to shed his clothing the moment he walked in the door. He showered three times, and scrubbed his body until it was raw, trying to wash away his betrayal of Jude.

In his mind, Tommy played out different conversations he should have with Jude—going over a variety of different scenarios that would cause her to forgive him. He knew that it would be an uphill battle, but Tommy also knew that it would be worth it. He had to talk to Jude—he had to explain what she had witnessed and apologize. He would keep apologizing until she knew how much he meant it.

…

She had been crying for at least an hour. But now, there were no more tears and Jude was simply laying down, numb to everything. She recalled the evening, from the reassurance Kwest and Sadie gave her, to the moment when the world felt like it was crashing down. Seeing Tommy kissing that woman had broken something inside of her—different than when he left without a word. After explaining everything, Jude knew that Tommy didn't have much of a choice in going to Montana. Granted, he could have done things a bit differently, but overall, he was just following orders.

But tonight, there were no orders to follow—he kissed another woman on his own. She had just started to consider opening herself up to him again, as more than friends, and he does this. He completely crushed her, and he was probably too focused on the other woman to realize it or care.

The idea that Tommy may not care that she was hurt broke something inside of her. She decided that things would now be different. No longer would she let him walk all over her. No longer would she let herself fall for him. In that moment, Jude resolved to get over Tom Quincy once and for all.

She sat up and turned to face Chuck in one swift movement. He was obviously startled by her action and looked at her with questioning eyes. "I'm done," was her only comment.

After she didn't say anything else, Chuck asked, "Done with what?"

Jude bit her lip, not sure what to tell him and where to start. She didn't mind explaining how she knew Tom or giving him a glimpse of their history, but she wasn't sure if he really wanted to hear.

Seemingly knowing her thoughts, Chuck grabbed her hand, telling her, "If you are willing, I would love to know what's going on." Caressing her hand with his thumb, he continued speaking. "Obviously you know Tom from more than just working on our record...you told me that you were friends before?"

Jude nodded, deciding to simply lay everything out for him. "Back when I was an artist for G, Tommy and I were pretty much best friends. Since his best friend was dating my sister, we spent a ton of time together. Somewhere along the line, I started to fall for him." Though Jude wanted to tell Chuck the truth, she wasn't sure how much detail she should go into. She didn't want to seem like a love sick fool, but if she wasn't honest, the depth of her emotions now wouldn't make any sense.

Taking a breath, she continued. "I didn't think he felt the same way, so I didn't do anything about it. I didn't want to ruin our friendship because of some misguided feelings on my part. He was my best friend and one of the only people I could turn to. Because of that, we had this weird status quo that we didn't break out of." Straightening her posture, Jude spoke again. "But, I wasn't entirely right when I thought that he had only friendly feelings. Right before he left, Tom asked me out. He took me on a date to one of my favorite restaurants...and to be honest, it was pretty perfect." She smiled at the memory of that night. It truly had been one of the best nights of her life, and no matter how hard she tried, she would never be able to fully erase it from her memory.

"If the date was so perfect, why did he leave?" Chuck asked, breaking her out of her memories.

She recalled telling him about Tommy leaving, though, at the time, she let Chuck think that they were only friends. Trying to hold back the tears, Jude took a deep breath. Letting it out, she moved on with her story. "That night he left...without a word. Now I know why he had to, but back then, I was lost. Here I was, thinking we had this perfect night that might have been the start of something amazing, and he left. He didn't tell me anything, just left without a trace. Even worse, I knew that he was still in contact with Darius and Kwest. I didn't understand why he didn't trust me enough to let me in...why he didn't think I would understand."

She could no longer hold back the tears, and a few escaped down her cheeks. "Over the year-and-a-half he was gone, I kind of lost it. I felt so numb and so lost...so lonely. Kwest and Sadie were always together, Spied had Karma, Wally and Kyle were...Wally and Kyle. On top of that, I couldn't write anything, I had no more inspiration. Darius released me from my recording contract and I bought the rehearsal building."

"Wow," was Chuck's only response. It was obvious he wasn't sure what to say.

But Jude understood—how was someone supposed to respond to that kind of story?

After a minute, he looked at her intently. "So what about now? Why was tonight so rough?"

Jude smiled sadly. "After Tom left, I felt like maybe no one would want me. Literally, I was consumed by this anxiety that I would be alone the rest of my life. But then, over the past month or so, things were kind of back on track for us. We were being friendly again and I had this idea that maybe there was still a spark on his part." Looking down at her hands, she reveled in the caress Chuck still provided. "Tonight, I was talking to Kwest and Sadie and they said that maybe we should take things slow—explore any feelings that remained. After dinner, I went to grab some stuff from the studio and saw that he was still there. Thinking that it would be the perfect time to open up a bit, I went to say hi."

A scowl came over her face at the memory of Anna. Realizing her change in attitude, Chuck squeezed her hands lightly, reassuring her that he was still there for her.

Smiling at his efforts, Jude spoke again. "He was in his office making out with some chick he knew from Montana." She shrugged her shoulders in defeat. Her story was finished, and there was nothing left to say. Once again Tom Quincy broke her heart, and there really wasn't anything she could do about it. Lost in her moment of self-pity, she was startled out of her reverie when a pair of strong arms wrapped around her.

Rather than focus on the situation with Tommy, Jude centered her thoughts on the comfort Chuck was providing. She relaxed into his arms, letting some of the last tears fall. After a few minutes in his embrace, Jude pulled back. Chuck wiped the tears from her face, then held her cheek in his palm. "Thank you for telling me, Jude."

Shrugging her shoulders again, Jude didn't say anything, only smiled in response. Leaning into his hand, she blinked once more before speaking up. "Do you think I could get cleaned up?"

Chuck removed his hand from her face and stood, offering her a hand to help her up. "Why don't you take a bath, light some candles, relax. When you're done, we can put on _Roman__Holiday_—escape from the drama."

Smiling at his thoughtfulness, Jude took his hands and stood. "That sounds perfect." As she headed in the direction of the bathroom, she caught a glimpse of the clock on the wall. "Oh my gosh!" escaped her lips. "It is super late...why don't I just take a shower instead."

A laugh escaped his mouth at her words, but Chuck told her, "Whatever you want, hon. I'll see you when you're done."

Jude nodded her head and continued onward towards the bathroom. Not twenty minutes later she was out and changed into the pair of sweats that Chuck had left for her. She felt relaxed, the hot water washing away some of the tension from earlier. Walking back into the living room, she saw two large mugs full of steaming hot cocoa. The movie was cued up on the television, and blankets and pillows were laid all over the couch and floor.

Chuck was walking out of his room, buttoning the flannel shirt he had changed in to. Jude caught a glimpse of his well-defined abs and, for a moment, her mind began to wonder what the rest of his body looked like. But, when the shirt was buttoned the rest of the way, her thoughts returned, and Jude went over to the couch.

Before sitting next to her, he put a fire in the fire place. Finishing the task, he took a place beside her and put his arm up, allowing her to snuggle up next to him. Soaking up his warmth, Jude cuddled into his side, feeling incredibly thankful for his friendship. In the past couple of hours, she had seen a different side of Chuck, one that she wanted to see more of. She had known him for a while, and she had always enjoyed their friendship. But this ultra-caring and sensitive Chuck was new. Jude forced her mind to clear, and as it did, she mellowed out and she settled further into the couch, becoming more comfortable.

However, as the opening credits began to roll, she felt Chuck shift next to her. "Jude, I want you to know that I'm here for you. I'm really glad that you told me about Tommy, and I won't let him hurt you again." He gave her a solid hug, holding on to her as if to shield her from the pain.

He pulled back first, but Jude was the first to speak. "Thank you, Chuck. I don't know what I would do without you." She moved back to her place by his side, once again settling into the couch. With his arm around her and the movie playing on the big screen, Jude considered her words to him. With Spied being gone on tour, she had felt a little lost. Sure, she talked to him at least once a week, but it didn't take the place of a reassuring hug.

Feeling content, Jude sat back to enjoy. She loved Audrey Hepburn, and she loved this movie, so it was a perfect escape. Not thirty minutes later, she was out cold, finally finding rest after an emotional day.

The next morning the smell of coffee brought Jude out of a deep sleep. A smile lit her face before her eyes even opened, thankful for what was sure to be a strong brew. Eventually opening her eyes, she was pleased to see a cup of coffee on the table in front of her. Picking it up, she took a deep sip, ignoring the burning feeling it left as it poured down her throat.

Finishing the cup in record time, Jude stood and stretched out her back. She turned at the sound of a door opening behind her, finding Chuck standing there. "Good morning," she offered with a smile.

"Hey, Jude..." He paused, waiting for a reaction. He wasn't disappointed when she stuck her tongue out at him. Before she could do anything else, though, Chuck crossed the few feet and wrapped her up in a giant hug. Holding her close, he kissed her on the forehead before asking, "How did you sleep?"

The rest of the morning passed without incident, the pair working around each other with ease. Jude tried to not think about the previous day, instead giving in to a pattern of playful banter and light flirting. She didn't acknowledge it as anything more than taking her mind off the inevitable emotional encounter that was bound to happen with Tommy.

Eventually, they made their way into the studio. Waking Blind was still working on their album, so it was necessary to make an appearance. Chuck had promised that they wouldn't do any recording, knowing that it would be difficult for Jude to interact with Tom so soon. There were still songs to be written for the album, so he told her that they could spend their time doing that.

The sight of G Major's front door brought on a whole new wave of anxiety for Jude. Her breath shortened and her eyes grew wide, panic quickly setting in. Her demeanor completely changed, causing Chuck to take notice.

Rather than push her forward, he stopped walking and turned to face her. "Jude, you need to breathe. I will be right next to you the entire time." He brought her into a hug, trying to provide comfort and strength in the midst of her near-breakdown. Mimicking his actions from that morning, he kissed her forehead and continued to hold her close. "Whatever you need, I'm here for you, okay honey?"

She smiled at the term of endearment that Chuck had first used the day before. She liked the feeling it gave her when she heard it—like she mattered and would be taken care of. After a few more moments, the friends separated; but that didn't stop Chuck from grabbing her hand in a tight grip. He managed to open the door for her while still maintaining his hold, taking his place next to her as soon as they were through the door.

Without any effort, he steered her to the back of the studio and straight in to Studio C. It was the smallest of all the studio spaces, and not as state-of-the-art as the rest of G Major, but it was perfect for writing. Anyone who knew Jude knew that she didn't like to be interrupted with her writing, so the moment the door to Studio C was shut, no one dared to enter.

Jude sat on the floor with her guitar in her hands, her notebook open before her. Chuck had been amazing all day long—getting her coffee in the morning, hot tea in the early afternoon, and even sending Nate out for a private stash of Pop Tarts. Three different times Tommy had tried to talk to her, and each time Chuck made sure he was by her side and sending the other man away.

It was late in the afternoon when Darius called a meeting to go over the progress of Waking Blind's album. As they all took seats in the conference room, Jude was dismayed to discover that Tommy was sitting next to her. Thankfully, Chuck was on her other side, and when he realized who she was sitting next to, he put an arm around her shoulders. Hugging her close, he whispered to her, "I'm right here, honey. Just ignore him, okay?"

Nodding her head, she smiled at his words. Turning to him, she whispered in his ear, "Thanks." She settled into his embrace, much like she had the night before, taking comfort in his strength.

After the brief meeting, Jude moved to stand, but was stopped by a hand on her arm. Looking up, she began to panic when the realization hit that it was Tommy holding her down. "What do you want?" she asked, trying to be calm despite the anxiety that gripped her.

"Jude, I'm sorry, I need to explain..."

"Nothing." Before he could get another word out, Chuck interrupted him. Glaring at Tom, he gently put a hand on Jude's other arm.

She smiled up at him gratefully, a bit of the anxiety easing away. She allowed him to help her up, not letting her eyes leave his the entire time they walked out of the office. If they had, Jude was afraid that she would break. She was barely able to hold it together all day, and sitting next to Tommy during that meeting hadn't helped. At least twice her hand had brushed with Tommy's, each time sending a spark through her body. She couldn't have handled talking to him, especially alone and with no reinforcement. Jude knew that she was done with Tom Quincy. She needed to grow up, and she needed to move on.


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey guys:)**

**So, it appears as though DLS is done with. With that in mind, I will be much more regular at updating here on FF. Your comments are greatly appreciated...I know, it may take a few extra moments, but your responses are such an encouragement. They truly make me want to update more quickly.**

**Here is chapter 8...I hope you guys enjoy the update. I am going to try to get Chapter 9 uploaded by Tuesday.**

**Happy reading and reviewing:)**

**Chapter 8**

Watching her walk out of the conference room was hard enough; but watching Jude leave the conference room with her eyes locked in a gaze with someone other than him someone else's arm wrapped around her was pure hell.

Tommy slumped back into the chair he had previously occupied and let his elbows rest on the table. His head fell to his hands and stayed there for what seemed like an hour. In reality, probably only ten minutes had passed, but it didn't matter to Tom. He knew that he had screwed things up, but an incredibly optimistic sliver of him had hoped that he could apologize, explain what happened, and they would be back to being friends.

Kwest found him in the same positions a bit later, giving away his presence with a chuckle. "Man, what happened to you?"

Not lifting his head, Tom muttered, "Shut up," not willing to say anything else.

He could feel Kwest taking a seat next to him, and they sat in a companionable silence for a few minutes. Moments later, his best friend spoke up again. "T, what the hell is going on? You've been in a funk since getting in this morning, and you haven't moved since the meeting wrapped fifteen minutes ago."

Finally removing his head from his hands, Tommy turned to face his best friend. "I screwed up, man."

A smirk on his face, Kwest raised his eyebrows. "That much is obvious, Tom. But what did you do?"

He rolled his eyes before answering. Tommy was careful in choosing his words, not wanting to be too open. "Jude may have caught me in a compromising position."

"A compromising position, huh? And explain what exactly that means..."

His best friend was enjoying his misery far too much, and Tommy didn't like it one bit. Glaring at Kwest, he took a deep breath and mumbled, "I may have accidentally kissed Anna..." He left the statement open-ended as if he wasn't sure.

Instead of receiving a punch on the shoulder or a comment about how he was a dumb-ass, Tommy was surprised when no words left Kwest's mouth. There was a full minute of silence as his best friend processed what he had been told, and Tom was becoming more unsettled with each passing second.

Finally, Kwest spoke. "You really are an ass, aren't you, Tom? I mean, your timing is impeccable...impeccably idiotic, really."

Not allowing him to say anything else without hearing an explanation, Tommy tried to make him understand. "It wasn't like I really wanted to kiss _her_, but she was there. I know, I was completely weak, and it was dumb, but Jude and I were only friends."

A hard smack on his back caused Tommy to wince. About to hit Kwest back, Tommy didn't get the luxury of complaining when his friend spoke up first. "Like I said, you're an idiot! You want more than just friendship with Jude, right?"

"Yeah, more than anything," was Tom's immediate response. Regardless of his irritation with Kwest, Tommy couldn't help but answer the question truthfully.

"Well, she feels the same way. And just last night, when she was over for dinner, Sadie and I convinced her that maybe she shouldn't be quite so closed off."

Having a hard time processing what Kwest was saying, Tommy just looked at him with wide eyes. Kwest must have realized that his friend was a bit slow, and continued his explanation. "Man, Jude realized that maybe she had been a bit unfair and wasn't giving things with you the chance they deserved. She decided to take things slow and a step at a time, but she wanted to explore moving forward with you. Plus, after what you told me about Anna, I told Jude that she wasn't a threat and that there was nothing to worry about."

"Oh shit!" escaped Tom's mouth in a low tone. He was realizing the extent of the damage he had done in that moment, and he wasn't sure how to react. He had known that Jude wouldn't easily forgive his mistake with Anna, but after hearing about the conversation she had with Kwest prior to seeing his moment of weakness with the woman from his past, he very well might be done for.

A low groan escaped his mouth at the realization. Kwest sat there, trying to decide what to do or say to make his friend feel better. But, knowing that any words would be futile, he continued to sit in silence. After a few minutes, Tom stood suddenly. He knew that he screwed things up, but that didn't mean he would give up. He loved Jude and needed her in his life—he had to make it work.

With long strides, he walked out of the conference room, making his way towards Studio A where Jude was working with the band. He was determined to make her understand, to make sure she knew that Anna meant nothing.

Halfway across the lobby, Tommy nearly tripped over his own two feet when his eyes landed on Jude. Chuck had opened the main door for her and she was passing through without a look back. He literally felt his heart drop into the pit of his stomach. Any resolve and determination he felt only a moment ago was gone in that instant.

His girl was walking away...his girl wouldn't even speak to him...his girl was finding comfort in the arms of someone else, and that nearly killed him. Not knowing how to deal with the sense of loss that immediately consumed him, anger and frustration took over.

Storming into the studio, Tommy nearly threw himself into the first available chair. Without even looking at the band members still there, he closed his eyes. "You guys can get out of here. We're taking the rest of the day off."

One by one the band members filed out of the studio. Tommy was too caught up in his own world to see the glares that each of them sent his way, obviously having heard that something went down between him and Jude.

Trying to have a somewhat productive day, Tom picked up a set of headphones and listened to some of the stuff that Waking Blind had recorded over the last few days. But, unable to focus on anything, he stood thirty minutes later. Grabbing his keys, wallet, and phone from his office, Tom decided that he needed to get away. Hopping in his car, he put his sunglasses on and headed to one of the few places where he could clear his mind.

A short while later, he drove up to the pier, needing the quiet and solace that it provided. Grabbing his guitar out of the passenger seat, Tommy walked down to one of the few benches. Though there was no particular pattern to his strumming, it provided the calm that he needed in order to think. He knew that, if things had been hard before, rebuilding a relationship with Jude would be even more difficult now.

…

For the next week, Tom was forced to allow his anger and frustration to stew. After escaping that day with Chuck, she had left Toronto. He heard rumor that she had gone to the farmhouse that had been in her family for a few generations, and it wouldn't surprise him. When she and Sadie were young, their family would go there at least once a year. As the sisters grew up, they hadn't visited as much, and the old farmhouse had been forgotten by the family. Of course, it had always been a special place for Jude—a few years ago she had confessed to him that it was one of the only places she could be completely herself. She told him that it was a place to be real and to let the superficiality of the industry to melt away.

It would be no surprise to Tommy that Jude would go there to be alone, to be away from him. Thankfully, though, she was only gone for five days. Granted, those few days were tortuous for Tom, but he understood why she left. Her first day back in the studio was somewhat of a disaster—Jude still wouldn't look at him and there had been at least three screaming matches between the two of them over lyrics and melodies. Tommy had told her and the rest of the band to go home early, knowing that it didn't matter how long they spent in the studio, nothing would get done.

But, today was a new day, and he could only hope that things would be different. It certainly started better—Kwest had brought him a fresh coffee before Waking Blind arrived. Enjoying the last few sips, Tom tried to prepare for the day ahead.

He heard the studio door slide open, and turned to face whoever it was that interrupted his moment of peace and quiet.

Startled, Tommy nearly choked on his coffee. "Jude, uh...hi...uh..." He was at a loss for words, not sure how to react to his girl being in the studio. It was just the two of them, and he wasn't sure if she would attack him or not.

She didn't, instead grabbing the chair that was next to him. She was looking at her hands, as if trying to get the courage to speak.

Deciding to take the chance and speak first, Tommy turned to face her. "Jude, you have to know I am so sorry. Anna..."

"Don't, Tom." She wouldn't let him continue, but finally looked at him. Their eyes caught, and she continued speaking. "Look, I'm sorry I over-reacted. I had no right to be so upset."

He wasn't sure how to respond, but Tommy knew he had to make sure that she understood how much of a mistake Anna had been. "You don't have to apologize, Jude." He went to grab her hands in a moment of weakness, but was brought back to their current situation when she jerked her hands away from his. With a sigh, he continued, "Anna was a mistake...someone from my past who..."

"It doesn't matter." Again, Jude interrupted him.

Clearly she wasn't going to give him much room to make his case, to make her understand—something that severely irritated him. But, being that he had screwed up so royally, Tommy felt like he didn't have much room to complain. Her voice brought him back to the present, focusing on what she was saying.

"It shouldn't matter who Anna is. We aren't dating, we weren't an item...we are friends. If you want to date or hook up with some chick, you shouldn't have to tell me about it." She turned to face the board, done with the conversation they were having. "Now, let's get to work."

Tommy was about to respond, make her realize that he didn't care about Anna, but she had already donned a pair of headphones and was bobbing her head to the music. He could swear that her eyes glimmered with the moisture of an unshed tear, but resigned to working on music, he put on the headphones and began to work. Regardless of how mad or upset she was with him, they worked well together. Tommy took comfort in that, hoping that their musical connection would remind her of his love for her.

Around one o'clock, the studio door slid open quietly. Neither Tom nor Jude noticed their new companion, continuing to clean up a couple of Waking Blind's tracks. After a few minutes, they finished the song, and both removed their headphone sets.

"How's it coming?"

Chuck's voice startled Tommy, and his stress level rose exponentially. Turning, he caught a glimpse of Jude as she found Chuck's eyes. The smile on her face was beautiful, sweet and caring.

She looked at her cell phone and, realizing what time it was, Jude jumped out of her chair. "It's good. I think we're ready to get some new material recorded."

"Awesome." Chuck smiled at her, and Tommy felt his heart cringe. The band member looked at his watch and stuck his other hand out for Jude to take. "Wanna grab some lunch?"

Putting a hand to her stomach, Jude nodded her head. "That sounds perfect! I'm starving!"

With that, the pair left the studio without so much as a backwards glance. Tommy's heart dropped, yet again. It was something he was becoming very familiar with—the sinking feeling of a broken heart. Turning back to the board, Tommy grabbed the notebook he had been working in lately and began to write. It was the only way he could process his frustration and sadness without blowing up at someone.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

Though they had finished their meals nearly thirty minutes ago, Jude and Chuck were still sitting at the restaurant. They were chatting about the progress of Waking Blind's album and how things were going with the band now that they were gaining some public recognition. They discussed the tour that Darius was planning for the band, trying to figure out who the opening act could be. Chuck told her how Jack and Riley had finally set a date for the wedding, deciding to get married a few months after the tour finished up.

After their waitress refilled their drinks, there was a brief lull in conversation, accompanied by a funny expression highlighting Chuck's face. He looked deep in thought, but severely confused. It was enough to cause Jude to question, "What's wrong?"

Chuck bit his lip in a completely endearing way, one that had Jude picturing him as a little boy. She smiled at the thought, waiting for him to respond; when a few minutes passed in silence, Jude started to become more concerned. "Chuck? What's wrong?"

Finally, he met her gaze and offered a small smile. Though hesitant, he reached across the table and grabbed on of her hands, gently caressing the top with his thumb. "Jude, you know how important you are to me, right?"

Without a pause, Jude answered, "Yeah, Chuck. You know that you're important to me too, right?"

He nodded his head, as if trying to process what to say next. His head continued bobbing up and down slowly, causing Jude's curiosity to increase even more. Eventually, he opened his mouth, "Over the past few months…well, recently…uh, I guess…" Clearly frustrated, Chuck shook his head back and forth.

Jude was starting to get concerned at his actions and covered his hand that still held hers. "It's just me, Chuck. What the hell is wrong?"

He seemed startled at her words, surprised by her tone. But, rather than question her, he lifted his head and took a deep breath. "Jude, lately I've been thinking that I want to explore being more than just friends. I know that Tommy caused you a lot of pain and hurt and that you may not be ready for a relationship yet…but I want to wait. I'll wait until you're ready to move forward." Chuck took another breath and grabbed both of her hands in his, "You are amazing, Jude…seriously amazing, and I don't think you even realize it."

Not sure how to respond, Jude was at a loss for words. One of her best friends just confessed that they have feelings for her… Even more, he understood that she wasn't ready to jump in to something to committed and intense. But, she also acknowledged how wonderful Chuck had been over the past few weeks. He had taken care of her constantly, making sure she had whatever she needed. He had been a sense of strength when she didn't know if there was anything left.

While she was processing all that Chuck had confessed, he continued to hold her hands. After a while of silence, he told her, "You don't have to say anything yet, I just thought you should know."

She couldn't help but smile at him. Amidst his honesty and vulnerability, he wasn't pressuring her for anything. With that in mind, she looked at him a moment longer before responding. "Chuck, I'll be honest that I wasn't really expecting this." She could see his eyes turn to the table and quickly continued, wanting him to hear her out. "But," she emphasized the word, "…maybe there is the potential for something great between us. I still want to be friends for now, but I'm willing to be open to something in the future, once I get past the drama of Tom Quincy and ready to move on."

If she was being honest with herself, Jude would have admitted that the idea of moving on from Tommy was terrifying. Just the thought of him not being a constant in her life caused her throat to close and her chest to clench. But the fact was that Tom Quincy didn't care for her the way she cared for him. He didn't love her, he didn't want her, he didn't want to be with her…that was the reality of the situation, and the reality of their relationship.

As much as it scared her to get past any ties to Tommy, Jude knew that Chuck was an awesome guy. He was a good friend to her and an amazing musician. He could read her well and was open and honest with how he was feeling. Chuck wasn't scared of commitment, and it didn't bother him that she was a few years younger than him. He hadn't dated her sister, or half of Canada, for that matter, and he got along with Spied, Wally, and Kyle well. Other than the love of music, Chuck was close to the opposite of Tommy, and that had her interested. For as many times as Tom had hurt her, Chuck had taken care of her.

Lost in her thoughts, it took Jude a few minutes to realize that Chuck had stood up and was offering her his hand. She closed her eyes to rid herself of the comparisons, opening them a moment later and looking up. Grabbing his hand, she stood, and the pair were on their way. Since the restaurant was close to the studio, they had walked, and Jude was comforted that Chuck didn't let go of her hand the whole way back.

They continued chatting about different things, not bringing up the more serious side of their earlier conversation. Ten minutes later they arrived at the studio, hands still locked, smiles on their faces. Amidst their walk, Jude had decided that maybe it was time to get over Tommy, and there was no better time than the present to start. But, upon entering the studio, the first person her eyes landed on was Tommy, and the look of sadness made her want to run and embrace him. She unintentionally grabbed Chuck's hand more firmly and diverted her eyes to the ground, trying to avoid confrontation with the man who still held her heart.

…

The next month passed quickly—everyone was focused on Waking Blind's album and the constant promotion Darius had them doing. Both in the studio and after hours, Jude and Chuck were usually together. They would work on music, hang out with the band, and go out to different movies and restaurants in their spare time.

Jude continued to have her weekly phone call with Spied, who was still on tour. He kept her updated on the boys and would recount the crazy adventures they were having; she would tell him of the places that Chuck took her and the progress being made on Waking Blind's album.

The most recent phone call found Spied confessing that he had thought about doing his own album—going solo. Jude told him that he should talk to Wally and Kyle about it, if anyone would understand, they would. She asked if he had written anything for a potential solo album, and he began to tell her about the few songs he had started.

After talking for a while, Spied's voice came across the phone, abruptly saying, "You're different, Jude."

Confused by what he said, she asked, "What do you mean? How am I different?"

There was a pause before Spied answered, but Jude's mind was racing. What was so different about her? Nothing had really changed in her life lately…things with Tommy were nearly impossible once they weren't in the studio, things with the album were going great, Sadie and the baby were doing fine and due any day…

"You seem more…happy, I guess." Though he finally answered, his words gave no clarification to Jude. Thankfully, he continued. "Like, a couple of weeks ago, you seemed tired and worn out…it seemed like you were going through the motions without really knowing what was going on. Tommy really messed up, huh?"

The day after she found Tommy kissing that other woman, Jude had called Spied in tears. He was one of the only people she could be completely honest with, and she had needed his friendship and support in those moments.

Since then she had been spending more and more time with Chuck. He did seem to make her happy and lighten her mood…that had to be what Spied was talking about.

"Spied, I think it might be because of Chuck," Jude pondered aloud.

There was a brief pause on the other end of the line before Spied agreed. "I think you're right, Dude. You guys have been hanging out a lot, huh?"

She began to nod her head, as if her friend could see her, but quickly opened her mouth to speak. "Yeah, usually we do something every day."

"What about Tom?"

Jude could tell that he wasn't sure how she would take his question, but she appreciated the honesty of his question. "What about Tom, Spied?"

There was a pause before he expanded on his question. "Have you even said a word to him in the last few weeks? Do you _want_ to talk to him? Are you really done with him?" There was a second of silence in separating each question, only serving to highlight their weight.

As always, Spied hit the nail on the head. Jude didn't know how to answer, those were the exact questions she had been struggling with the past few weeks. "I don't know," she whispered. "He's been the only guy I've wanted for three years...how do I just give that up? But, how can I still have feelings for him when he so obviously doesn't feel anything for me?" Her words stopped as she got lost in the confusion of her feelings. Eventually, she continued. "Honestly, Spied, I'm terrified to let him go...but I don't know how to keep him."

A companionable silence overcame their conversation as they became resigned to their thoughts. A few minutes later, Spied asked, "I guess the real question is if you want to keep him..."

Another few moments of contemplation surrounded them, Jude consumed by Spied question. Finally she realized that her best friend was talking to her. "What was that?" she asked.

"How are you feeling about Chuck? Do you want to move beyond friendship with him?"

"Maybe?" Jude responded. "He's such a great guy and he totally gets me...he gets the music..."

Before she could continue, she was interrupted. "Jude, just because he's great doesn't mean that you should date him."

She couldn't help the laugh that escaped her lips at his comment. "I learned that lesson after dating you." There was truth to his words though, and Jude knew that she would have to be careful moving forward. It would be easy to get caught up in a relationship with Chuck because of who he was and not because of who he was to her.

"Just be careful that you're really over Tom before moving forward." He let that be his final comment and moved on to tell Jude more crazy tour stories. Another ten minutes passed before they hung up, both gasping for breath after laughing so hard.

Jude felt encouraged after talking to her best friend, grateful for his friendship, and more thankful for his honesty. But, as funny and light as the end of their conversation had been, her mind was weighed down by the questions and confusion clogging her mind.

She continued to sit in her room, nursing a cup of coffee for nearly an hour. She went from wanting to ignore Tom Quincy for the rest of her life to wanting to call him and saying she just wanted him to be happy. The hardest part was knowing that both extremes were very much true. Looking around her room as if to find some answers, Jude's eyes landed on the clock by her bed. Realizing that she should have been at G Major ten minutes ago, she scrambled off the bed and grabbed her purse from its position on the floor. Literally racing down the stairs and out the door, Jude jumped in her car and headed to work.

Along the way, she allowed her mind to wander back to her dilemma. She resolved to be civil to Tommy, and not just inside the studio. She decided that he was just a fantasy—a dream that she had focused on for far too long. It was time to face reality and move on. Since Tommy didn't care about her, she would find someone who did.

The hint of a smile lit her face at her newfound plan. Continuing on her way to the studio, Jude finally allowed her mind to relax and her thoughts turned to a chord progression she was trying to work out for a new _Waking__Blind_ song.

…

The following week had been busy. There had not been a moment to rest, and Jude felt like she barely had time to breathe. They had been at the studio all day every day working on Waking Blind's album, trying to get everything recorded by tomorrow. The following week the album was scheduled to be mastered, the release date set for the week after that.

Jude was sitting at the sound board listening to the final copy of the final track, headphones on, head bobbing up and down. Tom had stepped outside to answer his phone, and Chuck was…somewhere. He was still at the studio, but Jude wasn't sure where exactly. Focusing her attention back on the task at hand, she was once again lost in a world of lyrics, beats, and the rhythm of the song.

A few minutes later, Tommy slipped back into the studio, taking the seat next to Jude. She barely acknowledged his presence, though not because she was still furious with him. After talking with Spied the week prior, Jude had decided to officially move on. She began to talk to Tom when they weren't in the studio, even calling him yesterday morning to see if he wanted her to bring some coffee to the studio for him.

Determined to make the best of her situation, Jude had acknowledged that she missed his friendship. But, not wanting to get her heart broken again, she had resolved to take things extremely slow with Tom. She was still hurting from seeing him kiss the other woman, but didn't want that one event to create a lifetime of regret and pain. Nonetheless, she was thankful for the distraction Chuck's friendship provided.

Another hour passed before Jude shed her headphones, letting a groan escape her lips.

"Are we done, girl?" Tom asked, a grin beginning to appear on his face.

Jude couldn't help but copy his expression, answering, "I think we are…" She chose to ignore his use of her pet name, instead distracted by the sparkle in his eyes. She stood to stretch, putting her arms above her head and elongating her form to ease the cramped muscles.

Looking back down at a still seated Tommy, Jude allowed her smile to grow, "I think we're done."

After a brief pause, Jude was startled by Tommy leaping out of his seat and wrapping his arms around her. "Ooof" was her only response as she allowed herself to enjoy a moment in his embrace.

"Congratulations, girl," was whispered in her ear, and it was all Jude could do to keep from shivering. The feel of his breath tickling her skin was tantalizingly wonderful. After too much time had passed, Jude forced herself to separate from him, though in that moment it was the last thing she wanted.

Shaking her head to bring her out of the Tommy-induced haze, Jude gulped in a breath. Unfortunately, the air around her was suffocating, the scent of him intoxicating. Having to turn around to regain her senses, Jude took another deep breath.

However, the ringing of her phone brought her out of the reverie. Picking it up, Jude answered without looking at the display to see who was calling her.

"Now?" was the only thing she was able to ask after hearing what the other person had to say. After another brief pause, she simply answered, "We'll be right there."

Filled with excitement and trepidation all at the same time, Jude closed her phone and simply sat for a moment. But, as soon as her feet caught up with her brain, she catapulted out of her chair and started scrambling her things together.

Startled by a hand on her shoulder, Jude jumped to the side. Looking to her side, she was strangely relieved to see Tommy standing there, concern evident in his eyes.

"What's going on, Jude? Is everything okay?"

Only then did she realize that she was supposed to tell Tommy that Sadie had gone into labor. So caught up in getting to the hospital, Jude had completely forgotten to let the others know what her sister had told her only a moment prior. "Right…uh, Sadie has gone into labor and we need to go to the hospital." She continued to pack up her things and was irritated when Tom's other hand rested on her other shoulder.

"Jude…" He paused, waiting for her attention.

When she didn't look at him, he put one hand on her cheek, causing a small gasp to escape her lips. She hated how one simple action made her forget everything around her—Waking Blind's finished album, Sadie's pregnancy, her niece or nephew's impending arrival.

"Jude…" he said again. She looked up, her light blue eyes clashing with his dark ones. With her full attention focused on him, Tom continued. "You know it's gonna take a while for the baby to come, so calm down."

Before she could say a word of complaint, a finger was on her lips and he continued speaking. "Let me grab my keys and I'll drive you to the hospital. You're too frazzled to drive right now."

The calmness displayed on his face began to sooth Jude, his firm voice gave her a much needed sense of direction. Not having the energy or desire to complain, she nodded her agreement and grabbed her purse.

Tommy took her hand and led her out of the studio, making a quick stop in his office before continuing towards the back door. Along the way, Jude nearly ran into Chuck, causing her to lose her balance and Tommy's grip.

Thankfully, Chuck was there to catch her, and Jude ended up in his arms and not on the floor. "Where are you going?" he asked.

"Sadie's in labor!" she exclaimed, eyes sparkling in excitement.

"Holy hell!" he responded. "Let me take you to the hospital."

Though she appreciated his offer, Jude didn't want to wait a moment longer to see her sister. But, she truly appreciated Chuck's offer, and wanted him to be there too. Thankfully, Tommy saved her from having to respond, telling the other man, "We're already on our way."

He again grabbed Jude's hand and turned back towards the door. In what seemed to Jude as a moment of maturity, Tom turned back to Chuck. "Why don't you bring Jude's car and meet us there?"

Seemingly surprised by the offer, Chuck was quiet for a brief second before reaching his hand out. "Let me have your keys. I can leave in a minute or two."

Keys changed hands and Jude was once again dragged along, making it out to the car in record time. Not even ten minutes later they had made it to the hospital and Jude made her way to her sister's room. They talked about how Sadie was doing and if she was nervous, Jude loving the details of her sister's pregnancy. She was unaware of the awkwardness surrounding the two men in the waiting room, instead enjoying time with Sadie before she was told to leave.

When Kwest poked his head in the door thirty minutes later, he asked Jude to relieve some of the tension between Tom and Chuck. Begrudgingly, she agreed, and headed out to the waiting room. Walking out the door of her sister's room, Jude asked the nurse how long it would be. Disappointed by the answer, she continued on her way to ease the tension between the two men in her life.

Upon seeing them, she exclaimed, "Five hours…at least!" The confusion clear on their faces, she explained, "The nurse said it would be at least five hours until my niece or nephew is born. I don't want to wait that long!"

The musical laughter of Tommy brought a smile to her face despite her impatience. Just as she was about to make another comment, his phone rang, causing the nearby nurses to glare. With a guilty expression, he answered his phone and walked down the hallway.

Jude made her way over to Chuck and took a seat next to him. He put an arm across her shoulders and pulled her close before whispering, "I'll keep you busy…"

She pulled away to look at his face, and his expression caused her to giggle. Eyebrows were wiggling up and down and a grin had taken over his face. Having no response, Jude looked around at the room that would be her home for the next few hours. For the first time she noticed a guitar on Chuck's other side, and smiled when he nodded, knowing instinctively what she was thinking. "Yeah, its yours. I thought you might want something to keep you busy for however long it would be."

Grateful for his thoughtfulness, Jude gave Chuck a quick hug. Grabbing the guitar after they separated, she ran her fingers over the strings, loving the sense of belonging that they brought. For the next hour, she strummed different chords and different songs. Not focusing too much attention on the task at hand, Jude was lost in the familiarity of the instrument.

A few hours later, Chuck decided to inform his band mates of where they were and the status of Sadie's pregnancy. As he walked down the hall, Jude took it as the perfect opportunity to talk with Tom. As part of her plan to move on, she decided to apologize for her coldness towards him over the last month.

Taking a seat next to him, she questioned, "How're you doing? Bored yet?"

A smirk with some raised eyebrows was his only response for a moment. But, the silence was broken and the expression more serious when he turned the question back to her. "How are _you_ doing?"

His sincerity was obvious, and Jude appreciated the concern so evident in his voice. "Fine…I'm doing fine. I just want the baby and Sadie to be fine. And I want to meet my niece."

"Your niece, huh?"

"I think I want the baby to be a girl…but I'd be okay with a boy too." She couldn't hide the smile that appeared every time she even thought about "baby Taylor". She was literally overjoyed to be an aunt, and couldn't wait to meet the newest addition to the family.

"Do Sadie and Kwest have a preference?"

"I don't think so. I think they just want him to be healthy." And truly, that was all Jude wanted too.

"You just called the baby a him…" Tommy pointed out.

Shrugging her shoulders, Jude told him, "A little boy would be cute too! I don't know what I want the baby to be!"

The pair sat in a companionable silence for a few minutes, enjoying the easiness of each other's company. Eventually, knowing what she originally came over for, Jude cleared her throat and turned to face Tom again.

Her intense gaze caused him to look over, and Jude took a deep breath before speaking. "Tommy, I want to apologize for the past month."

He began to protest, but Jude wouldn't let him get a word in, and instead continued. "I completely shut you out, and I'm sorry. I was really hurt when I saw you kissing Anna, but I didn't have a right to be. It isn't like we were together, and you are allowed to kiss anyone you want. I was acting immature and unreasonable."

Tommy seemed to be stunned and slightly confused, not saying anything in response.

His lack of words caused Jude to question whether or not she had been too harsh. Deciding that it wouldn't hurt to reassure him, she opened her mouth again. "I guess it comes down to the fact that I still want to be friends with you. I like when we can laugh and joke and have a good time."

Mouth having caught up with his brain, Tommy immediately answered when she finished speaking. "I missed you Harrison, and I miss joking with you too." Without warning, he pulled her close and wrapped his arms around her.

It was a place Jude found contentment. She loved the sense of security he seemed to provide, and found herself repeating a mantra of _Just__a__little__bit__longer_.

A few minutes into their close embrace, she heard his voice in her ear, "I'm sorry."

As she tried to separate from him, Jude was held in place by his strength. Tommy wouldn't let her go, continuing to mutter apologies. Eventually, he loosened his hold and pulled back so he could see her face. "I need you to know that Anna was someone from my past, and someone who doesn't matter. She was only a lapse in judgment—someone who I used to distract me." Looking away from her face, Tommy's gaze moved down to Jude's hands, his own hands following quickly. Grabbing her hands in his, Tom spoke, still not meeting her eyes. "I'm sorry for ever making you doubt that I care about you...that I..."

Before he could continue, Jude interrupted, "Tom..." Disconnecting their hands, she waited until his gaze met her own, Jude debated how this conversation would go. As much as she was reassured by his words, she knew that she couldn't let him get too close again. Sure, she missed him terribly, but she didn't want to be heartbroken, and that meant not letting her hopes get too high—being realistic about their relationship. They were friends, and continuing to apologize for past hurts would get them no where. Realizing that Tommy was now looking at her, Jude opened her mouth. "Let's stop focusing so much on the past and just move on." Sticking her hand out, she asked, "Friends?"

With a smile, he connected their hands and gave a firm shake. "Friends."

Sitting back, they were again surrounded by silence, but one that was familiar and comfortable. A few minutes later, Chuck came back into the waiting room, no longer on the phone and coffees in hand. Handing one to each of them, he sat on the other side of Jude, the air suddenly turning a bit colder.

Not sure what to do in order to break the tension, Jude rolled her neck back and forth to loosen the muscles. Sitting in uncomfortable waiting room chairs for three hours was taking its toll. Thankfully, Kwest walked in the room, giving them an update of how things were progressing. Sadie was moving along more quickly than expected, and they hoped to introduce "baby Taylor" to the world in about an hour.

Jude took it upon herself to text friends, Darius, and her father that the baby would be arriving shortly. Once that was taken care of, she grabbed her guitar to occupy the remaining time, and thankfully, the next fifty minutes passed quickly. The quiet waiting room was startled to life when Kwest burst into the room, exclaiming, "I have a son! I have a son!"

As quickly as he came, he was gone back into Sadie's hospital room. But, at his announcement, Jude jumped out of her seat, excitement completely taking over. Not sure how to contain herself, she began pacing, back and forth from one side of the room to the other. Another five minutes passed before Kwest appeared again. "Jude, do you wanna come meet Samuel, your new nephew?"

Nearly tackling Kwest in her excitement, she tried to restrain herself from shouting, "Yes!" Nodding her head up and down, she latched herself on his arm, demanding to be taken to her sister and nephew.

Arriving in the delivery room, Jude first embraced her sister. "I'm so proud of you, Sis." Separating slightly, she pulled back and kissed Sadie's forehead. Overcome by emotion, she whispered, "So proud..."

Taking a deep breath to get ahold of her emotions, Jude finally felt able to speak again. "Now, where is my handsome nephew?"

The smile that lit Sadie's face was beautifully bright, and she only pointed in the direction of her son in her husband's arms. Walking over, Jude anticipated what it would be like to see the new member of her family for the first time. Reality far surpassed expectations, and tears instantly began pouring down her cheeks and the beautiful sight in front of her. Reaching a hand out to caress his sweet chubby cheeks, she asked Kwest, "Can I hold him?"

"Of course, Jude." After carefully handing over his son, Kwest went over to Sadie and kissed her forehead, pride and joy emanating from his whole body. He motioned to the door, explaining that he would be back in a moment.

Jude was consumed by the shear perfection of Samuel, not being able to take her eyes off him. As she held him, she began talking to him, wanting him to know her. "Hey little man. I'm your Aunt Jude... You should know that you are already pretty popular—everyone wants to meet you." Placing a kiss on his forehead, she continued her soft words. "I'm glad I got to be the first to hold you after your mom and dad. I didn't know it was possible to love someone so quickly after meeting them for the first time..."

She was content to keep him in her arms, softly bouncing him in her arms. She was amazed that he wasn't even her own child, but she already felt connected to him, like he was a part of her. Jude knew that this little person would quickly become the most important part of her life.


	10. Chapter 10

**Hey all,**

**Sorry it took me so long to get this to you! Nonetheless, here is Chapter 10:) Please shoot me your thoughts...your reviews are seriously encouraging and I can almost guarantee chapter being done more quickly:)**

**AlAtt**

**Chapter 10**

The following day, Jude arrived at her childhood home bright and early. Today Kwest, Sadie, and Sam would come home from the hospital, and she wanted to make sure everything was perfect. Her first stop was the kitchen, unloading the many bags of groceries she bought before arriving. Her plan was to move into the spare room for the next week to help her sister and Kwest adjust to being parents. Since she wasn't exactly known for her cooking skills, Jude had gone to the store and grabbed as many instant meals as she could. Had she not taken preemptive measures, they would have been eating cereal for the next week—something that just wouldn't do for the new mommy or baby.

After unpacking all of the new groceries, Jude went up to the nursery to make sure everything was there. Even though Sam would be staying in Kwest and Sadie's room for a little while, she wanted to make sure they would have everything they would need. Once she assured herself that things were perfect, she made her way around the rest of the house, picking up and straightening out as she went. Looking at the clock, Jude realized she had about a half an hour until Kwest, Sadie, and baby Sam arrived.

Grabbing her guitar from the guest room—completely transformed from the fan-girl haven that used to be Sadie's room—Jude went back into the baby's room. Sitting in the beautiful rocker, she began strumming, thinking back to the tune she had been working on in the hospital. A few minutes of simple strumming passed before lyrics began to consume her. As she continued to play the chords on her guitar, her mind was working in overdrive, consumed with lines of love and hope for this new life that they had all been blessed with.

Lost in the music, Jude didn't hear the front door open, and was somewhat startled when Kwest came into the nursery with her nephew. Awkwardly putting down her guitar and standing up, she looked sheepishly at her brother-in-law. "Sorry, I kind of…"

"Got lost in the music?" At her nod, he smiled, "I've worked with musicians for how long? I know how you can get."

He pulled Samuel out of the car seat and set him in Jude's awaiting arms. Smiling, she began talking the beautiful baby. "How ya doin' bud? Did you have a fun ride home from the hospital? I bet your mom is glad to be home, huh?" All the while she was talking to him, Jude was rocking back and forth, content to just spend a moment with her nephew. Looking up to Kwest, she asked, "Did Sadie go to bed?"

"Yeah, she was pretty wiped out."

"Good." Glancing at the still quiet baby, she offered, "You can join her, ya know. Sam and I will be just fine."

Without hesitation, Kwest turned to leave the room. Glancing over his shoulder, he questioned, "Are you sure?"

"Kwest, we'll be great. Go get some rest." She was actually looking forward to spending some one-on-one time with Sam.

"Thanks." Before he got too far, he turned to face her again. "Just make sure to check if…"

"I know…check he needs to be changed or burped…make sure he's swaddled…if he's hungry I'll get Sadie." She had been there when Sadie was being tutored by the nursing staff at the hospital, and knew exactly what to do.

Smiling, he turned and went back down the hall towards the master bedroom.

Continuing to talk to her nephew, Jude enjoyed the calm that surrounded her. Even though she had "made up" with Tommy back at the hospital the day before, she knew that she couldn't allow herself to go right back to being best friends. And on the other side of things was Chuck. He was such an amazing guy, and he was so good to her. With him, there was no question as to what he was feeling or how he felt about her. He was honest and sincere and always thought about her.

As usual, the back-and-forth her mind was doing began to give her a headache, so Jude took a deep breath. Still holding Sam, she stood, grabbed a blanket from the basket to the side of the crib, and unfurled it onto the floor. Setting her tiny nephew on the soft coverlet, Jude grabbed her guitar and began picking out a tune lightly, not wanting to wake the sleeping baby. She continued to perfect the song, again becoming enraptured by the music.

Not quite an hour had passed when Samuel woke up, first just trying to stretch his arms, then letting out a whimper. Setting her guitar to the side, Jude picked him up, bouncing him back and forth. Though he seemed placated for a moment, Sam let out a painful cry, face scrunching and one escaped arm flailing. Checking for a wet diaper and burps only resulted in more tears, so Jude held the child close and started toward the door in an effort to get Sadie.

Just as she was walking down the hall, the door to the master bedroom opened and her sister walked out. Hands out, she cooed, "Hey buddy. Is my little man hungry?"

Jude followed her sister back into the nursery and sat on the floor. Sadie took her place in the rocking chair and began to nurse her son. "Thanks for letting me get some rest."

"No problem…Sam and I bonded and I figured you could use it."

There were a few minutes of silence, the precious sounds of baby Sam filling the space. Looking at her sister, Jude could tell that Sadie wanted to ask something, but was holding back for some reason.

"Spit it out, Sades."

Sadie's mouth opened in pretend indignation, her eyes widening in shock. But, Jude knew her sister well, and knew that she was completely faking her outrage. "Cut the act, Sis. Just ask what you want."

After a brief pause, Sadie rolled her eyes, giving in to the fact that her sister knew her so well. "Fine…Kwest said that you were playing something new when he came in earlier. I know it isn't for Waking Blind because their album is already done. Did you write something new?"

Not surprised with her sister's question, Jude closed her eyes, taking a moment to think of what to say. Deciding that she should just admit to it, she nodded her head. Opening her eyes slowly, she added, "Yup."

"What does this mean? Are you going to…"

"No." Jude's answer was quick and left no room for discussion. "It was just a one-time thing. I was inspired to write something for Sam, but I was just tinkering around. It's the first song I've written in a while." Of course, that was complete crap. Jude had been writing nonstop since Tommy had come back. No matter if things between them were amazing or completely awful and unbearable, he was her inspiration, through and through.

She hated that Tommy was such an immense part of her life…of her music. He brought out the best in her writing and composing, even when he didn't know it. In fact, she had been putting together some pretty amazing things in the past few months and had convinced Darius to let her use the studio after hours. Though she had her own studio in her loft, G Major had incredible equipment—top of the line. In addition, working at G Major gave her access to some pretty amazing instruments and tools.

Darius had caught her sneaking into the studio late one night, crawling in an open window. Not realizing that she was sneaking into Darius' private bathroom, Jude had tumbled through the window, to the ground, and into his office. Once she showed him some of the things she had been working on, he gave her a key and told her to feel at home. That was a few months ago, and Jude had been going to the studio at least once a week for her own music.

True to form, Darius had asked her periodically if she wanted to put something out there for the public, but she consistently declined. Though a part of her would love to make an album again, Jude wasn't sure she would be able to handle it, especially when so much of her music was about Tommy.

Wanting to escape the thoughts that seemed to lead to a downward spiral, Jude stood abruptly, slightly startling her sister. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I thought I would get started on dinner." Thankfully, Jude had looked at the clock and, with fifteen minutes until seven, it seemed like an appropriate suggestion.

Unsuspecting of Jude's desire to flee from thoughts of Tommy and music, she quickly agreed. "That's a great idea. Thanks, Sis."

Jude only smiled before walking out of the room. Passing through the living room she grabbed her phone, knowing that she would need help with dinner. Only twenty minutes later there was a knock on the door, and Jude opened it to find Chuck standing there.

Quickly embracing him, Jude smiled. Though Chuck was a part of the confusion she felt, Jude knew that he wouldn't pressure her for answers or progress. That was clearly evidenced when, instead of simply telling her how to bake a chicken, he told her to hang tight, he was on his way over. Now that he was here, she couldn't stop smiling.

"Thanks for coming." She led him into the kitchen and the pair began to get to work. After only five minutes, Chuck had her chopping vegetables for a salad. He was taking care of preparing the chicken while watching her, but Jude wasn't sure if it was to make sure she was doing things correctly or to make sure she didn't cut herself.

The pair worked in a companionable silence for a while, though eventually a conversation revolving around music began. Jude told him that Tommy would finish mastering the album this week and then it would be time for the tour.

News of the tour brought a bright smile to Chuck's face. Since meeting him, Jude knew that Chuck's biggest goal in his music career was being a touring rockstar. He wanted to be on the biggest stages, performing for the biggest crowds. Of course, musical integrity was of prime importance, but doing the "famous" thing was a pretty close second.

"I know it isn't a huge tour, but it's a start, right?" Even though he asked the question, Jude could tell that Chuck was thrilled.

"It's an amazing start!" And honestly, Jude did think it was a great way to start promoting the album. The tour would only be four weeks to venues through Canada, but it would start building a following for Waking Blind beyond the Toronto music scene. "This way you'll build up fans and, after the album completely takes off, you can do a bigger North American tour…maybe even something through Europe."

After checking on the chicken, Chuck turned to face her. "That would be insane! Can you imagine?"

She smiled, but her next words were put on hold when Kwest walked into the kitchen. "Hey, Chuck! How are you?"

"Great, great. Congratulations!"

Despite the grin, you could see the tiredness still shadowing Kwest's face. "Thanks. And hey, thanks for helping with dinner. You're joining us, right?"

"If you're sure its okay…."

"Of course!" Turning to Jude, Kwest put an arm around her shoulders and gave her a squeeze. Kissing her forehead, he told her, "Thanks for letting me sleep, I seriously needed that."

After they separated, Jude replied, "No problem."

Taking a seat on the barstool facing the kitchen, Kwest conversed with the pair. A few minutes before dinner was ready, Jude was setting the table when there was another knock at the door. Raising her eyebrows, she looked at her brother-in-law with a question in her eyes. When he shrugged his shoulders, she put down the utensils she was holding and went to the door.

Opening it, Jude was surprised to find Tommy on the other side. "Hey!" Giving him a hug, she led him inside. "What are you doing here?"

Following her into the kitchen, Tommy told her, "I knew Kwest and Sadie were coming home today and thought they could use some help. I know you're helping with the baby, but maybe they needed an extra set of hands."

"That's so sweet!" Jude exclaimed, truly touched that he would think of coming to the house. Despite her confusion, Jude was glad that Tommy came over, it brightened her already-shiny mood. "I think we're set for the minute, but stay for dinner!" She could see his hesitation, but didn't want to give up that easily. She knew that she had to be careful, but Jude couldn't deny the desire to have him close. "Please?" she begged.

"Fine," he consented with a smile.

"Good!" Turning to Chuck, she gave his back a quick rub, saying, "Thanks for making so much food. The leftovers will be great for Kwest and Sades, and we have enough for Tom." She went back to the table to finish setting it, choosing to ignore the slight tension that had descended upon them.

Thankfully, Kwest stood to greet his best friend, giving him a "man-hug" and asking how his day was. Chuck greeted Tommy as well, sticking out his hand to shake.

Leaving the three men to talk, Jude finished preparing the table and went to check on Sadie. If she was asleep, Jude wouldn't wake her, knowing that her sister would need to rest every opportunity that she could. Peaking her head in the nursery, Jude was pleased to see Sadie standing. "Hey," she whispered, noticing that Samuel was asleep.

With a tired smile, Sadie responded with the same greeting. "Is dinner ready?" she asked.

"Yeah. Do you want me to bring something upstairs or do you want to come down?"

Sadie seemed to notice that there were more voices downstairs, but, anticipating her question, Jude told her, "Chuck helped me cook dinner and Tommy just stopped by."

"Oh…I guess I'll come down. Let me get Sam in his bassinet."

With that, Jude went downstairs to finish putting dinner on the table, Sadie following a few minutes later. Soon, the five friends began eating, enjoying each other's company and the food that Chuck had prepared. About halfway through dinner, Samuel's cries could be heard on the baby monitor.

Noticing Sadie beginning to stand, Jude put a hand out stopping her actions. "Sades, let me just check on him. If he's hungry, I'll let you know." Not allowing room for arguments or disagreements, Jude headed up the stairs to the master suite where Sam was. Picking him up, she carried her nephew into the nursery and sat in the rocker, the movement bringing the tears and cries to a stop.

Rather than go downstairs immediately, Jude continued to rock Sam, singing a verse from the song she had been working on earlier that day. It had started as a song for Sam, but quickly changed into a lullaby that Jude hoped to sing to her own kids one day.

_From your head down to your toes,  
>You're not much, goodness knows.<br>But you're so precious to me,  
>Sweet as can be, baby of mine.<em>

Noticing that Sam had fallen back into a sweet sleep, Jude went back to the master bedroom to lay him down. Making sure the baby monitor was on, she went back downstairs. The adults sat and talked for another thirty minutes before Sadie was consumed by yawns. Realizing how tired her sister and brother-in-law must be, Jude began clearing the table and washing dishes. Sadie went upstairs, but Kwest, Chuck, and Tommy all helped to put the kitchen back in order, saying their goodbyes shortly thereafter.

Turning off all the downstairs lights, Jude made her way up the stairs deep in thought. As she climbed into bed after getting ready, her thoughts drifted to that night. Though she loved having Chuck there to help, she couldn't deny the happiness she felt at seeing Tommy. Despite her best intentions, there was still a part of her that held strong feelings for him.

Knowing that nothing could happen with Chuck until she figured out how to put away her feelings for Tommy, Jude resolved, once again, to be more careful. Being friends was one thing, but getting sucked into anything more than that with Tom would not be okay.

After her recent conversation with Spied, Jude knew that pursuing something with Chuck could be a good thing…amazing, even. With the thought of something spectacular as a possibility with Chuck, Jude let herself drift off. Tomorrow would be a busy day, and she wanted to make sure she was well-rested.


	11. Chapter 11

**Hey all,**

**Here is chapter 11. I know some are not thrilled with the direction thus far, but hang in there! I promise things will get better! Send those reviews my way...they are always an encouragement:)**

**Enjoy**

**Chapter 11**

Walking up to the front door of the Taylor home, he couldn't believe it had already been a week since Sam had been born. In honor of Jude's last night staying at the house, they were having a celebratory dinner.

As he waited for someone to open the door, Tommy recalled the past couple of days and smiled at the thoughts. Knowing that a new baby had to be a huge transition, he had stopped by at least once every day to help out around the house or give Jude a break from her "nanny" duties. Not that she needed any help though—she was amazing with Sam. The moment he started crying, she was there, knowing exactly what was needed and how to take care of him. If someone couldn't get him to sleep, all it took was for Jude to sing a sweet lullaby and Sam was out.

On the days he stayed for dinner, Even after Sadie and Kwest had gone to bed and baby Sam was down, he and Jude stayed up—talking, cleaning the kitchen, watching movies, or going over music. While Waking Blind's record was now done, there were still other artists that needed producing. Dairus had decided to give Tom two up-and-comers, wanting them to be produced by one of the best.

In the midst of his musings, the door opened, and Tom was a bit surprised to see Chuck on the side. More, he was disappointed that it wouldn't only be the four of them. He had truly been enjoying the one-on-one time with Jude the past week, and he didn't like sharing her with Chuck, especially when he viewed the band member as one of the reasons his relationship with Jude wasn't more romantic in nature.

Only nodding his head in greeting, Tommy walked past Chuck and straight into the kitchen. Since he had been helping out so much over the past few days, the house was familiar to him. Placing the two loafs of bread on the counter, he first went over to Sadie and gave her a hug and kiss on the cheek, then shaking hands with his best friend. "Hey, man. Thanks for having me over tonight."

"Of course, T. Besides, who were we to deny the girl of the evening?"

"What?" He hoped that Kwest was saying Jude wanted him there, but wanted confirmation before silently rejoicing.

"Jude said that the only people she really wanted here tonight were you and Chuck. We were going to have more of a party, but she wanted something simple."

"Oh..." Though he tried, Tommy couldn't stop a small smile from breaking out. Wanting to direct conversation away from topics that caused him to blush and get his hopes up, he was about to ask Kwest about when he would be returning to work, but was interrupted by Jude entering the kitchen.

Sam in her arms, Tommy didn't think he had ever seen anything so beautiful. It was like the first night in the hospital when Sam was born. Though Jude hadn't seen him, Tommy had walked in on her holding the baby and whispering to him. She seemed to glow with love and adoration for her nephew, obviously thrilled with the new addition to their lives.

When her eyes landed on him, she smiled, immediately changing her course so as to greet him. Reaching up, she kissed him on the cheek, exclaiming, "I'm so glad you're here!" Her eyes landed on the bag of bread that he had brought, and her smile got even wider. "Oh! You brought the bread from that little French baker that I love! That will be perfect for tonight."

"I thought you would like that." Continuing to smile at his girl, Tommy reached for Sam, wanting to hold the precious baby. Who would have thought that this little boy would turn him into a sentimental and sappy kind of guy? After greeting the child, Tom turned to Jude, asking "Do you need any help? What can I do?"

Raising her eyebrows, Jude questioned, "Are you sure? You look pretty content holding Sam."

The smile she gave him was sincere and sweet, and Tommy was again reminded of how amazing she was. Wanting to stay close to her, he told her, "I can hold him later." Handing the child off to Sadie, Tommy washed his hands. "Now, what can I do?"

"If you're sure...start making a salad? Everything should be in the fridge, we just need to cut some tomatoes and avocado. There should be some Parmesan in that container and some dressing in the door." She pointed out the different ingredients as she listed them off, turning back to the stove where she was stirring a risotto.

A few weeks ago, Tommy would have been surprised to see Jude tackling a dinner like this, but now, it seemed normal. She had been practicing her cooking skills and was constantly receiving tips and pointers from Chuck, enabling her to have a few dishes under her belt.

Despite the fact that this was supposed to be a dinner thanking and celebrating her, Jude was doing a majority of the work, and it almost was as though she was hosting the dinner. As much as he tried to fight it, Tommy could imagine the two of them hosting her sister and family for dinners. He could see the two of them, kids running around, living together as a family.

At that image, it was like being hit with a two-by-four, and Tommy couldn't breathe for a moment. He couldn't imagine wanting anything more than he did a future with her.

But, regardless of how close they were after only a week of being friends again, Tommy knew that she wasn't ready for a romantic relationship with him. She still didn't fully trust him, something he was trying to change every moment he spent with her. But, no matter how much he was trying to "win her back", Tommy also knew that Chuck was working his way into her life. He could see how much the other man wanted her, and it brought a pain to his chest just thinking about it.

As he was thinking of the other man, Chuck appeared in the doorway to the kitchen. "Sorry about that, Darius was just giving me some more details about the tour."

"No worries," Jude spoke up. "Did he finally get the bus details worked out?"

"Yeah, thankfully." Looking over to Kwest, Chuck told him, "Darius agreed to give you your own bus."

Looking somewhat confused, Kwest asked, "Why? I don't need a whole bus to myself...that's a total waste."

"It would be if you were going to be by yourself on the bus, but since Darius also agreed to let Sadie and Sam go with you…Darius likes to pretend he's harsh, but when it comes to babies, he's a softie." Jude looked at her sister and explained further, "When you went into labor, I called Darius and asked him to let you and Sam join the tour. It wouldn't be fair to separate you guys after only a couple of weeks! He said he would think about it, but after sending him some pictures of my sweet nephew, he agreed. The only other thing we had to work out was the transportation. But obviously, D was able to get another bus and you guys are set."

With her son still in her arms, Sadie attempted to jump out of her seat, grabbing Jude in a tight embrace. "Thank you, Sis. I didn't know what we were going to do with Kwest gone!"

"No problem, Sades!" Separating herself from her sister, Jude looked around the room. Eyes landing on Tommy, she raised her eyebrows in question.

Intuitively, he knew she was wondering if the salad was done. Tom gave her a thumbs up before putting the salad on the table. He thought about what the next month or so would hold. Chuck would be gone with Waking Blind on their tour. Kwest, Sadie, and Sam would be gone as well, hopefully leaving time for him and Jude to spend together.

"Now, since I think everything is ready, let's eat!"

With that, the group migrated towards the table. Dinner was filled with conversation, and Tommy was surprised how well he was able to be civil with Chuck. Granted, he ignored the other man most of the time, but every once in a while they did speak. Tommy didn't roll his eyes once, something he was quite proud of.

As there was a lull in conversation, Jude stood to clear the table. Again, Tommy was surprised that she was doing so much of the work when this dinner was supposed to be for her. Standing, he told her to sit down, not allowing any room for disagreement. He began to gather plates and took them into the kitchen. A moment later he was joined by Chuck who, apparently had the same idea as him.

The pair worked in an awkward silence, Tommy washing the dishes, Chuck loading them in the dishwasher. Things were cleaned up quickly, both not wanting to spend any more time than necessary with the other. Ever the baker, Chuck got to work getting dessert ready. Seizing the opportunity to spend some time with Jude away from Chuck, Tom headed into the living room.

As he sat next to her, Jude looked up at him. "Thanks for taking care of the dishes...I really appreciate it."

He couldn't help but notice how tired she looked as he told her it was no problem. Her eyes closed for a moment, and she leaned into him. Tommy wasn't sure if she realized what she was doing, but he embraced the moment nonetheless.

Eventually Chuck joined them, bringing dessert with him. Despite his personal feelings towards the man, Tommy had to admit that he was talented in the kitchen. Another hour passed quickly, surprising Tom that it was already past ten. Looking next to him, he smiled at Jude, realizing that she was asleep. Her head hadn't left his shoulder, letting him enjoy their close proximity.

Before he realized what was happening, Chuck had walked over to her side of the couch and began stroking her arm to wake her up. "Jude, let's get you home."

As she began to awaken, Jude sat up and rubbed her eyes. "What time is it?"

Tom opened his mouth to answer, but Chuck spoke first, telling her, "It's past ten. Why don't I drive you home?"

Still groggy and not completely aware of her surroundings, Jude only nodded her head and allowed Chuck to pull her up. Not a minute later, the pair were out the door, Jude being shuffled into Chuck's car.

Tommy watched her go out the door, then transferred his gaze to the window, watching her being helped into the car. Even after the pair drove off, he was left staring at the spot Chuck's car had been. Startled out of his reverie by the cushion next to him sinking slightly, Tommy turned to see who joined him on the couch. 

Not completely surprised to see his best friend, Tom turned to face Kwest more directly. "I can leave if you need to get some sleep…" He began to stand, but was stopped with a hand across his chest.

"Dude, sit down. Jude checked on Sam right after dinner and Sadie went upstairs as soon as Jude and Chuck left." Removing his hand from Tommy, he told him, "Let's have a chat."

Resigned to knowing this talk would happen sooner or later, Tommy nodded his head. Kwest stood and went into the kitchen, Tommy following a minute later, realizing that was his friend's intent. Seated at the barstools with fresh cups of coffee in front of them, the two friends held a companionable silence for a few moments. Eventually, Kwest looked up and asked, "How are you…like _really_?"

"Fine, man." No, he wasn't fine. But at this point there wasn't anything Kwest could do to make it better.

With raised eyebrows, Kwest looked at him and simply waited. Rolling his eyes, Tommy took a deep sigh, continuing again. "So, I'm not fine. But, it's my own fault, and there isn't really anything you can do about it."

"Humor me, T. Things with Jude seem to be back on track, right?"

"Yeah." Shrugging his shoulders, Tommy explained, "Jude apologized to me right before Sam was born. We were sitting in the waiting room, and she apologized. She told me that she was being immature and unreasonable about the whole Anna debacle. We're back to being friends."

"Just like that?" Kwest questioned, doubt obvious in his voice.

"Kind of…" As he thought of the past week, Tommy knew that there would always be something more to his relationship with Jude. "I told her that Anna was a mistake and that I was sorry for making her doubt that I care for her."

"You care for her?"

"I know, I know. I almost told her I love her, but she wouldn't let me."

"Of course she wouldn't." Obvious confusion covered Tom's face, inciting Kwest to offer more of an explanation. "T, I remember that night. Jude was finally ready to admit that she still had feelings for you and that she wanted to try something. After all of your talk about her being it for you and wanting to prove that you cared, she sees you kissing another girl…"

Tommy interrupted Kwest, crying in frustration, "I know I messed up!"

Kwest shook his head. "That's not even close to what I'm saying, man." Seemingly in an effort to make Tom listen, Kwest put a hand on the forearm that was gripping the coffee cup. "Tom, the fact that she initiated being friends again means she doesn't want to completely lose you from her life. And just look at this week…" He paused again, making sure Tommy was listening to him. "You guys have been together a ton this week and have fallen back into the natural Tommy and Jude dynamic."

"But I can tell she's still reserved…not completely letting me in."

"Of course not…she doesn't want to get her heart broken again."

"But I won't! I love her!" Tommy was tired of saying it, not because it wasn't true, but because he wanted everyone to believe him.

"I know you do. But just because you love her doesn't mean you can promise to never hut her."

Kwest's wisdom made sense to Tom. He never wanted to hurt Jude, but sometimes life got in the way of that. "I know that's true, but you have to know that I have never wanted to hurt her or make her cry. I do love her…"

"I know you do, Tom." His mouth was open as if to say something more, but there was a hesitation.

"What is it?"

"I don't say this to get your hopes up unnecessarily, but I think there is still a part of Jude that loves you too. Right now she's confused, but she obviously still cares. Show her that you're here no matter what, you aren't going to run."

"I'm not. Honestly, Kwest, I don't think I could. I need to be close to her, even if we are only friends. I want her to be happy, and if that means she isn't with me, then so be it." Tommy was being completely honest with Kwest. More than anything, he would love to be the one making her happy, but as long as she was happy, that was all that mattered. Wanting to move on from his depressing lack of a love life, Tom asked Kwest, "How is the adjustment with having Sam home?"

"Amazing!"

The proud new father literally beamed at the mention of his son, and Tommy instinctively knew that Kwest was going to be an incredible father. "Was it nice having an extra set of hands with Jude around?"

"She was a godsend. Seriously, I don't know what Sadie and I would have done without her!"

Tommy nodded his head in agreement. He had seen how natural she was with the baby and wasn't surprised at how much of a help she was to the new parents. "It seemed like she was a natural. Can you imagine how perfect she'll be when she has her own kids?"

"Yeah. I was kind of surprised, to be honest. But now, I'm a little surprised she doesn't have a kid already…or at least a dog."

"I totally know what you mean! She looked so perfect taking care of Sam…so completely beautiful."

"When is she not beautiful to you?"

The question caused Tom to blush, a pink hue covering his cheeks. He always thought Jude was beautiful—as a sixteen year-old punk rocker or her more mature self holding baby Sam. "I guess that's true, huh?"

"Yeah, always has been."

"You might be right," Tommy admitted. Realizing that it was past eleven, he stood and placed his mug in the sink. "Thanks for the chat, man."

"Anytime, Tom." Kwest shook his hand after they had walked to the door. "See you soon?"

"You bet. Call if you need anything."

"Will do."

With that, Tommy ran to his Viper, the coldness of the air surprising him. Getting in the car, he raced home, wanting to rest after a long week. As much as he had loved helping out Kwest and Sadie the past week, Tommy was ready to relax. He had loved spending time with Jude, loved watching her interact with Sam. At times, he allowed himself the brief fantasy that it was all real—him and Jude raising their son. But he had to return to reality sometime, accepting that Jude wasn't with him and Sam wasn't their son.

After arriving home, Tommy changed quickly and threw himself on the bed. He was tired, but couldn't seem to shake his and Kwest's earlier conversation. Kwest thought a part of Jude still loved him. Even if that wasn't the case, she cared enough to want to be friends with him.

For now, that would have to be enough. He hated that he couldn't do anything to change Jude's mind, and he hated that he wasn't the one bringing her home and taking care of her. Despite how hopeful he was for rest, Tom's mind continued to be plagued with thoughts of Jude. Knowing that sleep would not come, he reluctantly got up and wondered through his apartment. He grabbed a glass of water, taking small sips while looking across the city just beyond his balcony.

Allowing his thoughts to take their own direction, Tom continued to stare at the expanse of Toronto. He didn't know how long he stood there, but eventually, the thoughts began to come together. Unintentionally, lyrics were being formed, and a melody paired with the words.

In order not to forget, Tommy went straight to his office/studio and began writing the words, noting different chords that would complement the melody. Before he knew it, hours had passed, and three songs had been started. Feeling energized and refreshed, Tom looked over his work and smiled. Not surprisingly, each of the songs was influenced and inspired by his girl. They were good. But, with a little more work, they could be great.

Wanting to continue working, Tommy realized that he would be better off fine-tuning the songs away from here, away from her presence. He needed to take a step back from friends and work, get away from the normal routine that made up his days. Picking up the phone, he was about to dial Darius and ask for a few more days off before acknowledging that it was four o'clock in the morning and his boss would not be happy with a wake-up call.

Putting down the phone, Tommy instead went into his bedroom and began to pack a bag. An hour later, everything he needed was set by the door, and Tommy opened his computer to begin searching for the perfect retreat. Wanting something out of the way, it was important that it wasn't too far away; regardless, he was coming up empty. After an hour of exploring different hotels, cabins, spas, and resorts, Tom was slightly discouraged. Racking his brain for any last creative ideas, Tommy looked around his office, eyes landing on a picture of Jude and him at her family's farmhouse just before he left Toronto.

In a moment of pure genius, he knew that the farmhouse would be a perfect place to get away and write. He knew that it was one of Jude's favorite places to create music—bringing out honest and unique lyrics that had been amazing hits.

Knowing that she had an eight o'clock meeting scheduled with Darius that morning, Jude would be up soon and Tommy could ask for a key shortly. Darius, on the other hand, would already be up at this in-humane hour of six o'clock, so Tommy dialed him instead. With permission granted from his boss, Tom loaded his car and made a stop at Jude's favorite coffee shop. Rather than call, he decided to swing by her place, drop off coffee, pick up a key, and say goodbye.

Not a half an hour later he was standing in front of her door, saying goodbye, key in hand. He told Jude that he needed to get away for a few days, and she was glad to let him use the farmhouse, knowing firsthand how perfect it was as a retreat. Soon, Tommy was off, trying not to dwell on how perfect Jude had felt in his arms as she hugged him goodbye.

Only a few hours later, Tom arrived, automatically feeling more relaxed. It was amazing that he was feeling so refreshed after not getting any sleep last night. After unloading his things and the groceries he bought, Tommy was ready to get to work on more music. On the way to the farmhouse, he decided that this album would be a present for Jude—he would give it to her for her twentieth birthday in a few months. Sitting at the table, he brainstormed all of the things he wanted to tell her, the things he wanted to confess.

Visions of a future and declarations of love fill the pages of his notebook, and before he knew it the clock read midnight. Heading upstairs, Tommy went into Jude's room, wanting to be surrounded by her. They may only be friends right now, but Tommy had confidence that one day, they would be together.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

After Tommy had dropped by her place a few days ago, time seemed to fly by. Jude was in and out of meetings with Darius and Waking Blind, helping Sadie pack for the four-week trip, and checking and re-checking the equipment needs, merchandise, set lists, and venue requirements.

When she wasn't finalizing details for the band and her sister, she was recording. Jude had been spending more and more time in her own studio, putting together different tracks and sounds. Being friendly with Tommy always helped her music, and once again she was feeling the itch to perform her own songs.

With the tour starting in just five days, Chuck was busy getting ready to leave and Jude was thrilled when Spied, Wally, and Kyle rolled into town having just finished their own tour. The night they got back home, Jude joined them for a "family dinner" at Karma and Spied's place, the boys regaling them with tales of tour escapades. That night, as Wally and Kyle departed for their own homes and Karma went to bed, Jude decided to confide in Spied. She shared some of her new music, wanting his input and needing his support.

As much as she loved her sister, Jude knew that this wasn't the kind of thing she would understand. Kwest was focused on the tour and Sam. Chuck would be excited, but he hadn't been around when she was recording and performing, and Jude wasn't sure how he would respond. She would love to share these new songs with Tommy, but being that he was the inspiration for most of them, it wouldn't be such a good idea. Besides that, he was still at her farmhouse and not easily reachable. Spied would be the perfect sounding board for her new material, able to be encouraging and constructive at the same time.

Once she led him through a few different songs, there was silence. But, after a few moments, he asked, "Does Darius know?"

"Uh, yeah. He lets me use the studio when it's empty." She wasn't sure where Spied was going to take his questioning.

"But does he know how awesome these are?"

"He hasn't heard anything, no."

A few moments of silence passed as Spied pondered the music in front of him. Looking at her abruptly, he asked, "Do you want to perform again?"

"Maybe?" Shrugging her shoulders, Jude explained, "I would love to get on stage again. But, I left it behind almost two years ago. As much as I want to, I honestly don't know if I could do it."

"Dude, really?" Reaching over, he grabbed her hand before continuing. "Jude, you are one of the fiercest performers ever. You could totally do it, it just depends on if you're ready for it."

Nodding her head at his words, Jude considered if she was really ready to be back in the spotlight. "I guess I'd be open to performing again, but not something crazy, ya know? Maybe a few small shows, more of an acoustic feel?"

"That would be rad." Standing, Spied began to clear the living room of the empty mugs and plates scattered around. "Why don't you talk to Darius about it?"

"I don't know…maybe." Jude helped to pick up the rest of the house, knowing Spied would want to get upstairs. They worked in silence, her thoughts focused on their conversation. She knew that she wanted to get back into performing, but Jude wasn't sure she was ready for the things that would come along with it. Maybe it wasn't time to jump back into things. She liked the privacy that her current career provided her with, rarely having to deal with paparazzi. She liked working with other bands and writing for other artists, but she did miss creating her own music.

As thoughts swirled in her mind, Jude finished loading the dishwasher and grabbed her purse. Giving Spied a hug and smiling when he kissed her cheek, she said goodbye, noting that they would see each other the next day. Sitting in her bed a while later, Jude considered her options. Making a mental list, she realized there were 3 real possibilities. First, she could tell Darius that she wanted to come back—recording, writing, touring, everything. On the other side of the spectrum, she could stay quiet and not say a word, continuing to produce and work with other bands. Knowing that neither of those were really what she wanted, Jude considered the middle ground.

Acknowledging that she wanted to start performing some of her own songs, Jude could talk to Darius and see if he would be willing to set up some small performances. As long as she was careful, she wouldn't have to deal with too much publicity or pressure. All in all, it would be a good way to ease back into her own music. With a plan in place, Jude relaxed a bit more and drifted off.

Sitting in Darius' office the following morning found Jude gulping down a giant cup of coffee. She had woken up early, anxious and excited for her meeting. Since she was out of coffee, Jude decided to grab some from her favorite French bakery down the street. While she waited for them to brew a fresh cup, she had been recognized by a fan. And, though she wanted to deny it, she loved the experience.

The fan, a girl who looked to be in her late teens, had gushed about Jude's music. She had all of the albums, singles, and concert DVDs, and confessed to going to almost ten live shows. Jude had gladly given the girl an autograph, and even agreed to take a picture with her, something she didn't usually grant to fans in the name of privacy. As she was leaving the bakery, the fan asked when Jude would be recording new music. After explaining that she was working on a few other projects right now, the girl had looked completely distraught. Her parting words were burned in Jude's mind, "I feel like you were one of the few musicians who was honest and real, and I think we need more of that. You inspired a lot of people…you inspired me. I just thought you should know."

Now, waiting for Darius to finish a phone call, Jude was re-thinking her decision. It was a scary thing to put herself back out there as a musician. In addition, no matter how well she eased back into her own music with some small shows, the public would always have an opinion, her privacy would be invaded, and her life would be more crazy. But, if she inspired a few kids, maybe changed a few lives, then wouldn't it be worth it? Instead of worrying about her own insecurities that would arise with returning to the stage, she considered the music and her fans.

Her fans deserved more than what she had given them in the past few years. And, even though it was completely nerve-racking, she did want to get back to her own music.

She was startled out of her thoughts by a dark hand waving in front of her face and a deep voice calling her name, "Jude? Jude!"

Shaking her head to focus on the imposing man in front of her, Jude brought her attention back to the meeting at hand. "Sorry?" She shrugged her shoulders and gave him a small smile, hoping he would let it go.

Thankfully, he moved on, asking, "What can I do for you this morning, Jude? I was surprised to hear that you wanted to meet so early." Darius knew her aversion to early mornings, and was curiously awaiting her explanation.

"Well, D…I was thinking about… What would you say if…"

Before she could complete a full sentence, she was interrupted. "Jude, spit it out!"

Darius never was one for patience, so her stuttering was understandably a bit annoying. "D, I think I want to record again…for real."

"For real?"

"Yeah… I want to put my music out there again, maybe do some shows? I want to start small, but I want to do my music again." As she was speaking, Jude's gaze was on her hands. Not sure what her former boss' reaction would be, her eyes ventured upwards to meet his. His eyes were wide with shock, but unreadable beyond that. "What do you think?"

"Jude, are you sure?"

Darius knew how much she had wanted to step away from the business, and it was obvious he was surprised at her proposal. "I think so, D. I don't want to go crazy with publicity and hype, but I want to get back in it. I miss the music, I miss performing."

"Wow." A few moments passed in silence before he opened a folder on his desk. Pulling out a stack of papers, he began rifling through them. "So, what kind of contract do you want? I think we should start with a single album. Obviously, I retain the right of first refusal for future contracts, but I'll let you have partial rights to your songs. We could look at putting together a tour once the album is mostly finished…"

He continued to mumble about various stipulations as he separated one small collection of papers from the rest. Jude was shocked at how quickly he took to the idea, and broke into his ramblings. Wondering if Spied had told Darius what she had showed him the night before, she asked, "Darius, did you talk to Spied?"

"What does Spiederman have to do with any of this?"

"Nothing, I guess. But how did you…" Jude wasn't sure where to start with her questions.

"Jude, I get that you were going through a hard time last year. But, I also knew that eventually, you would need to get back to recording. You were made to make music."

Processing what her once-again-boss was saying, Jude nodded her head. "But that doesn't explain why you were so quick to agree. I thought you would have me begging and pleading…bribing you with platinum records and awards. Why was it so…?"

"Easy?"

"Yeah." That described exactly how she felt. Sure, over the past couple of years she had built up a more friendly relationship with Darius, but it didn't change that he was always about the business, first and foremost. "Why?"

"To this day, you have been one of G Major's best selling artists. Even putting that aside, you're talented. You're a good writer, have a great ear, and connect with other artists. Waking Blind is the third band you've brought to me that are going to be great. I want you on my team, and I don't want to cause friction when I know that G Major is the right place for you."

"In that case, I want full rights to my own catalog."

Opening his mouth in mock surprise, Darius scoffed. "I'm honest and open with you and you get right back to business…what happened, Jude?"

"Shut it, D. I know you'll give it to me…same team, remember?"

"Fine. You get full rights to your music. How does everything else sound?"

Still shocked that things were going this smoothly, Jude responded, "Good, I think."

"Great." Darius handed her the small stack of papers he had been looking through before continuing. "This should be the right contract. Have your lawyer take a look and get it to me as soon as possible?"

"Sure." Jude began to stand, but wanted to clarify something before leaving. "Darius, I don't want it to be a huge production. I kind of want to ease back into things, take my time."

"I get it, Jude." While looking at her, Darius squinted his eyes trying to read her expression and feelings more clearly. "What do you miss most?"

"About music?" At his nod, Jude's response was immediate, "Performing." After a second, she amended her statement. "Writing and performing my own music."

"No surprise there." Standing, he motioned to the door, obviously done with the meeting. But, instead of seeing her out, Jude was surprised further when Darius asked, "Do you have some new songs?"

"Yeah…" Her voice betrayed the confusion she felt.

"Lets go in Studio A and take a look."

"Okay…" Jude led the way to the empty studio and set down her things. Grabbing a mini-flash drive from her purse, she hooked it up to the computer at the sound board and fiddled with the keyboard until her recent songs appeared as a list. Looking to her boss for the go ahead, Jude started at the top, adjusting the sound slightly so as not to completely destroy their eardrums.

In relative silence, the pair listened to the seven songs she had saved. One was _Now__and__Then_, the song she recorded the night of her nineteenth birthday. Another was the original version of _Dance__Me__to__the__End__of__Love_ that she had ended up recording with Chuck. The song she had dubbed _Baby__Mine_ was also included, as were four others that she had recorded over the past few months.

Jude waited a minute after the last notes of the last song finished before speaking. "I know they don't all fit and could probably use some more work, but that's what I have recorded."

"Any other songs you've written?"

"Do you even need to ask, D?" Pulling her journal out of her bag, Jude turned towards the back, showing him a few of the many songs she had written.

"These definitely have some promise, Jude. That first one is perfect, and I like the look of some of these." His last comment was made while motioning to her journal. "What if I sent you as the opener for Waking Blind these next few weeks?"

His suggestion was a complete shock to Jude. "What?"

"The kid we originally got to open for them just got sent to rehab and we need a new act. I was talking with some local managers, but nothing was coming together, so why not? You can debut a few of the songs you think are ready and do a small set each night, maybe three to five songs."

Momentarily sidetracked by the fate of the other opening act, Jude asked, "Wasn't he only seventeen or something?"

"Yeah, just turned seventeen, in fact. But that's not the point. What do you say?"

Overwhelmed by the option before her, Jude went back and forth in her mind. "Can I give you an answer tonight?"

"I have a seven o'clock dinner with distributors, and I want to know before then. Deal?"

"Deal." Jude shook his hand and watched him leave the room. Falling back on the couch, her head fell to her hands and a sigh escaped her lips. What should she do?

After sitting in the studio for a while, Jude knew that she had to get away in order to clear her head. Quickly she grabbed her purse and left before anyone could find her. As soon as she got in her car, she headed for the pier. She would never live it down if anyone knew, but it had always been her place to relax and think. It was peaceful and quiet, and close enough that she could be there in about twenty minutes, regardless of where she was in the city.

Jude got out of her car and went over to the bench. Ever since that day four years ago, Jude had felt a sense of peace being at the pier. Laying down and looking up at the sky, Jude mulled over the possibilities and decisions before her.

In all honesty, the contract Darius was offering her was pretty perfect. Assuming her lawyer thought everything looked right, she was ready to sign. The biggest issue she was struggling with was whether or not to go on Waking Blind's tour.

Her first reaction to Darius' suggestion was to say no. But, upon further consideration, Jude realized that maybe it would be a good thing. She did miss touring and performing, and it would be amazing to be on tour with Chuck and the band. Plus, she wouldn't be close to Tommy, and maybe the separation from him would be good.

In the week following the birth of Sam, Tommy had often been around the Taylor home. And, while she welcomed the extra set of hands, Jude didn't like how easily Tom was ingraining himself in her life. She had been sincere in her apology that night at the hospital, but had not expected their friendship to rekindle so quickly. With each passing day, she found herself looking forward to when he would stop by, hoping that he would stay for a while, wanting to spend as much time as possible with him. Those thoughts were the same as when she was fifteen, and she was scared to let herself fall into that pattern again.

She could set herself up for heartache by letting Tommy be such a central part of her life, or she could go. And, the more physical distance there was between them, the better. Jude sat up and looked out at the water. If she could get away from Tommy for a while, maybe she could focus on something else…or someone else. She could still be friends with Tom, talk on the phone and such, but not being near him would alleviate some of the butterflies that always managed to flutter when he was around.

But, regardless of any feelings she had towards Tom, the truth remained that she missed performing. She missed the rush of being on stage, the adrenaline of being in front of a crowd. The excitement she felt while simply thinking about performing was enough to convince her. Pulling out her phone, Jude first called her boss to inform him she would be joining Waking Blind on tour. They decided she would share the bus with Kwest, Sadie, and Sam, and she would be given some freedom to perform what she wanted. Darius' only stipulation was that he wanted to hear her songs before she debuted them to a crowd.

Details decided, Jude hung up with her boss and immediately dialed another number. It wasn't until he answered the phone did she realize that it may not have been the best idea. For as much as she was touting the benefits of some separation, Jude's first instinct was to dial Tommy. "Hey, Quincy. How are ya?"

"Fine, fine. It's been nice to get away and I've even done some writing. Thanks for letting me use this place, by the way."

"No problem! I didn't know you were writing again?" The statement came out as a question, but Jude smiled nonetheless. Knowing how many times she had gone to the farmhouse to write, she could literally picture Tommy lounging outside to write or sitting at the piano she had bought for the living room.

"Yeah, you know how it goes. I guess you could say I was inspired."

"Speaking of inspiration…" Jude paused, not sure how to share her exciting news.

"What is it Jude?"

Not letting her nerves get the best of her, Jude began. "I've been…inspired lately and was putting some things together with Spied the other night. He suggested I talk to Darius about maybe getting back into recording." Pausing to take a breath, Jude smiled at the memories of recording that came to mind.

"You're gonna record again? Jude, that's awesome! How much have you written? When does he want your album done?"

The flurry of questions interrupted her thoughts and memories. "Slow down, Tom. I talked to D this morning and he agreed to give me a contract. But I don't want it to be something crazy and all about the publicity. I want to take my time with putting together a record, ya know?" If anyone would understand, Tom would.

"I totally get that. I'm excited for you…so awesome…"

His voice trailed off, but Jude could almost hear his smile through the phone. "Thanks, but there's more."

"More?"

"A tour."

"A tour?"

"Yeah. Darius offered that I could open for Waking Blind." Her explanation was greeted with silence from Tommy's end of the line. Jude was a bit disappointed at the lack of response. She thought he would be excited for her. He knew how amazing it was to perform, and he knew that it was one of her favorite parts about being a musician.

"But that means you leave the day after tomorrow…"

Relieved that he finally said something, Jude was still let down at his response. "Yeah, we do. Do you not think it's a good idea?"

"No! I mean yes! Ugh!" She could hear him take a breath before clarifying. "Jude, I think the tour will be great. Granted, you could be headlining a stadium tour if you wanted, but I think this will be the perfect way to ease back into things. I'm just bummed that you leave so soon."

His instant response and explanation calmed her, even bringing a smile to her face. It was sweet that he didn't seem to want her to go. _Bad,__Jude_, she told herself. Pushing those thoughts aside, she instead asked, "When are you planning on being back?"

"I'll drive back tonight or tomorrow morning. I was planning on coming back within the next few days, but I want to make sure I get back before you leave."

"That sounds good. Give me a call when you get back into town?"

"For sure."

"Okay. Well, I guess I should go. I need to pack and get a few rough cuts of songs recorded for D." After a brief pause, Jude told him, "thanks for being excited for me."

"Of course I'm excited for you! How 'bout I take you to dinner tomorrow night? We can celebrate your contract and tour and maybe I can get a sneak peak of your songs?"

"You got it. We'll talk tomorrow for details?"

"Perfect."

Just as she was about to hang up, she heard his voice, but wasn't able to distinguish what he said. "What was that?"

"I'm really proud of you, Jude."

"Thanks." After hanging up the phone, Jude got back in her car and headed towards her loft. Though she hated to admit it, his approval meant more than almost anyone else. Distinctly focusing on banishing those thoughts from her mind, Jude dialed Spied to share the good news. Afterward, she let Kwest know as well, and then spoke to Sadie, informing her that they would be living together again for the next four weeks.

…

Arriving home, he threw his bags on the bed before hitting the shower. Due to some roadwork being done on the route home from the farmhouse, the drive had taken Tommy almost six hours. He had planned on making it home in under three, leaving him plenty of time to get ready and calm his nerves. Now, it was six o'clock, and he only had forty-five minutes before he had to leave.

After rushing through his normal routine, Tommy jumped into the Viper and headed to their favorite Thai food place. Thankfully, the restaurant was close to Jude's loft, and because he knew the owner so well, their food was ready the moment Tom drove up.

Though he and Jude had agreed that he would pick her up and then they would go to dinner, Tommy had changed their plans slightly. Instead of taking her to the restaurant, Tom had decided to get take-out and set up a picnic near to the pier. There was a park close by that overlooked the water, and he knew it would be the perfect place to relax and enjoy each other's company.

Arriving at the loft, he quickly got out of the car and raced up the stairs. Nearly crashing into someone as he took the steps two at a time, Tommy was surprised to look up and see Jude.

"I heard you drive up and, since my place is a complete disaster, I thought I would meet you halfway."

The way she shrugged her shoulders and bit her lip caused Tommy to grin. She had never been the most organized person, and the night before a tour, her loft was bound to be a mess. "No worries, girl. Let's get going."

Her bright smile caused his to grow. Turning, her grabbed her hand and led her back down the stairs. The pair caught up on menial things for a few minutes until Jude realized that they were not going in the direction of the restaurant. "What's going on, Tom?"

Trying to hide his grin, he responded, "Nothing...why?"

"Nothing? We're going in the opposite direction of the restaurant." She looked over at him, scrutinizing his expression before asking, "What do you have planned?"

Not able to completely conceal his smile, Tommy looked at her briefly before turning his eyes back to the road. "Really, it isn't a big deal. Just sit back and relax, it'll only take a few minutes to get there." Patting her knee, he told her, "Now, tell me about your new music."

She hesitated before grinning and launching into explanations about her songs. As they pulled up to the pier, her smile widened and she looked over at him. "What are we doing here?"

Deciding to finally let her in on his plans, Tommy parked the car and turned to face her. "We are going on a picnic. I know it's kind of cold, but I thought it would be nice."

The squeal that came from Jude told him it was a good idea, and he smiled. "Now, I need some help getting everything together." Getting out of the car, he went to her side and opened her door. As she stepped out, Tommy got his first real look at her and couldn't help but sigh. She looked beautiful—simple and elegant, but still Jude. She wore a pair of skinny jeans that showed off her curves perfectly. A vintage tee from a Clash tour was under a black blazer, and flat boots adorned her feet. It was effortlessly perfect, one of the things he loved most about her.

Jude didn't focus too much on what she looked like, but she always managed to look just right. Even when he first met her and she was a rebellious redhead, she was always "Jude."

Opening the trunk, Tommy grabbed the food and handed it to Jude. "You take this and one of the pillows and I can grab everything else."

He still wasn't sure how he managed to fit everything into the trunk of his Viper, but it worked. It was fall, so the evenings tended to get pretty cold. Because of that, Tommy brought three blankets with him: one to sit on and two to wrap around him and Jude. In addition, he brought a few pillows for comfort, his iPod for some background music, and his acoustic guitar in case inspiration struck. Determined to make the most of his time with Jude before she left, Tommy had wanted everything to be perfect.

As they made their way to the spot he had scoped out beforehand, they continued to talk. Jude told him about preparing for tour and helping to get Sam ready for the adventure. Laying out the blankets, Tommy asked, "How will it be traveling with him? How will Sadie do?"

A laugh escaped her lips, and Tommy smiled at her response. "As much as Sadie loved being pregnant and loves being a mom and loves Sam, I think she's hoping that this tour will bring some glamour back into her life."

Imagining Sadie trying to "live up" her time on the road, Tommy knew that Sam would still be with them. "What does she expect to do with Sam? Pawn him off on you?"

"Probably. I won't mind though…I love that kid so much." Jude took a seat and looked over at him. A look of pure adoration covered her face, causing Tom's breath to catch in his throat once again. Focusing on her words, he realized her look was for Sam, and he could only hope to be the recipient of such a look one day.

"I know what you mean." There was a moment of silence before Tommy decided to lighten the mood with mention of food. "So, what do you say we break into this feast?"

A loud grumbling could be heard coming from Jude's direction. In shock, she threw both of her hands over her stomach and giggled. "Obviously that sounds good to me."

Handing her a container of pad thai and a fork, Tommy smiled. "Enjoy."

The pair continued to talk through their meal, slowly working their way through the seven containers scattered on the blanket. Eventually finished with their feast, Jude laid back on one of the pillows and turned her head to face Tommy. "This was incredible. Thank you."

"You bet. I'm glad we got to do this before you leave."

"Me too, Quincy." Cuddling the blanket closer around her shoulders, Jude looked at him.

Tommy could tell she wanted to ask something, but was hesitating for some reason. "Just ask."

"Huh?"

"Don't try to play coy, you want to ask something, I can tell. Just ask." He knew her well, and wasn't disappointed when she rolled her eyes.

"Fine, you caught me." Sitting up a bit, she faced him more fully. "Can you play me something you wrote?"

Her question caught him completely off guard. He didn't mention anything about writing at the farmhouse. In fact, he purposely avoided mentioning anything about music so as to ensure she would be surprised at the final product. Could she mean some of his old music? "Something I wrote?" he asked, fishing for more information.

Fiddling with the edge of the blanket wrapped around her, Jude wouldn't meet his eyes. "I know that the farmhouse is the perfect retreat—it's own little world. But more than that, I know you. If you needed to get away it means you were processing something, and the best way to process something is to write."

He had to admit that she did know him well. It was amazing how connected they were, regardless of time or drama that separated them. Looking at her hopeful eyes and lip bit in anticipation, Tommy knew he couldn't refuse. Going through a mental list of the ten or so songs he wrote while at the farmhouse, he knew that most wouldn't work. Only five or six were good enough to record and, of those, most were a bit too personal. Sure, he would show them to her one day, but now was not the time.

Deciding there was really only one option, Tommy sighed. "I'll make a deal with you." Her eager eyes gleamed in excitement. "I'll play you something I wrote if I get to have a private concert of your new stuff."

Immediately sticking out her hand, Jude told him, "Deal." After they shook, she pulled her hand back into her lap. "You first, though."

"Fine." Grabbing the guitar from it's place behind him, Tommy double-checked to make sure it was in tune. Picking up a simple strumming pattern, he began to sing.

_Lost in the day, in a way, it's same as the one before this,  
>And I wish I could say that's it's all black and white<br>But it's grey. It's the same, it's the same and I'm so tired  
>But you are what I'm coming home to<em>

_Oh and I'm thinking about a red wine buzz and takin' it easy,  
>And I got you in my arms, takin' a break from crazy<em>

_And I'll say "hey,"  
>You'll say "baby, how's your day?"<br>I'll say "crazy"  
>But it's all gonna be alright<br>You'll kiss my smile  
>I'll pull you closer<br>Spend a while just getting to know ya  
>But it's all gonna be alright<br>I'm loving you tonight  
>Loving you tonight<em>

_And you are there on my heart at the start of my every morning  
>And I can't deny by the end of the day that I'm running on empty<br>But you make me full, steal my breath  
>You're so unpredictable<br>That's what I'm coming home to_

_Oh I'm dreaming about a romance, slow dancing with you  
>When I got you in arms, I don't care what we do<em>

_And I'll say "hey,"  
>You'll say "baby, how's your day?"<br>I'll say "crazy"  
>But it's all gonna be alright<br>You'll kiss my smile  
>I'll pull you closer<br>Spend a while just getting to know ya  
>But it's gonna be all alright<br>I'm loving you tonight  
>Loving you tonight<em>

_Every day is just the in-between  
>The hours separating you from me<br>I know you'll be waiting  
>I know that you'll be waiting<em>

_And I'll say "hey,"  
>You'll say "baby, how's your day?"<br>I'll say "crazy"  
>But it's all gonna be alright<br>You'll kiss my smile  
>I'll pull you closer<br>Spend a while just getting to know ya  
>But it's gonna be all alright<br>I'm loving you tonight  
>Loving you tonight1<em>

Somewhere around the first chorus, Tom saw Jude beginning to sway back and forth. Her eyes sparkled in the sparse light, and her smile was brilliant. He faltered slightly before starting the second verse, getting lost in her beauty and excitement instead of focusing on the song.

Knowing that he couldn't watch her as he played, Tommy instead closed his eyes. As he finished singing, he ventured a look at Jude, and was pleased to see her smiling back at him. "Tommy, that was amazing! I loved it!"

Eyebrows raised in question, he asked, "Really?"

"Oh my gosh! It was awesome! It was the perfect blend of fun and upbeat, but totally sweet and sincere lyrics… Tommy, you have to record that!"

Relief coursed through his body, and Tommy slumped forward slightly. Jude's reaction had been so positive and encouraging, it was better than he hoped. "If you're lucky I'll send you a copy."

Almost jumping up from her cross-legged position on the blanket, she exclaimed, "You have to! Please, Tommy?"

When she was sitting in front of him begging like that, he would do anything for her. But, instead of telling her that, he simply nodded his head. "I'll work on it in my spare time and get it to you while you're on tour. Now…" He handed her the guitar before continuing. "I believe it's your turn."

Reaching out to grasp the guitar, Jude shivered as the cold air invaded her blanket cocoon. Opening her mouth, her teeth began to chatter before she could say a word.

In order to prevent a case of frostbite from destroying her talented fingers, Tommy spoke up. "Rather than freeze, why don't we go back to your place so you can warm up. Besides, don't you need to finish packing?"

"How did you…?" Trying to look innocent, Jude eventually rolled her eyes. "Who are we kidding? Of course I still need to pack." Standing with a blanket still wrapped around her, Jude began to pick up the empty Thai containers that still littered the blanket. She tossed them in a nearby trashcan as Tommy continued cleaning up their area. Once they had everything in hand, the pair headed back to the Viper and back towards Jude's loft.

Arriving at the building, Tommy wasn't sure what to do. As much as he didn't want to go home, he knew that he couldn't push Jude too much. He wanted to spend more time with her, but he didn't want to do anything to make her question his intentions and his friendship. Her offer of coffee was the perfect excuse to join her upstairs, one Tommy accepted immediately.

As they walked up the stairs to her sixth-floor loft, they could hear the faint sounds of other bands practicing in the surrounding studios. The thought made Tommy smile, understanding the love of music that drove someone to be practicing this late with no signs of stopping. Trying to determine how late it actually was, Tom looked at his cell phone and was shocked to see that it was nearly eleven.

No wonder they had been so cold! Pausing as Jude unlocked her door, Tommy realized he wasn't that surprised that he and Jude had spent almost four hours catching up and hanging out. Back in the days before he left, they had often stayed out 'til all hours just talking.

Walking into the apartment, Tommy headed straight for the coffee-maker. "You go get some warm clothes on and I'll be up with coffee in a few minutes."

A grateful smile was thrown over her shoulder as Jude walked up the stairs to her room. "You're a lifesaver!" she called.

When the coffee finished, Tom grabbed two mugs and filled them, quickly heading up the stairs to Jude's room. Before walking in, he stood outside the door, "All clear?"

"Yeah, come on in." Greedily taking one of the mugs from him them moment he walked through the door, Jude gulped half of the contents down in one large sip. Closing her eyes in delight, she continued speaking. "If you want, you can sit on my bed." Finally opening her eyes, Jude looked around her room. "It isn't like there's much room anywhere else."

Making his way over to her bed, Tommy's eyes scanned the room. It was true, almost every surface of her room had clothes, shoes, and jewelry piled high. "What happened?"

"Well, I told Darius I wanted low key, and that means no stylist." Shrugging her shoulders, she continued. "It's not like I wanted one anyways. As great as Portia is sometimes, she's intense and neurotic. But, that still means that I have to come up with my own wardrobe for the next four weeks."

As she stood clutching her coffee and looking at each of the different piles she had made, it seemed like Jude was lost. He didn't blame her though. Knowing Jude, she didn't really care about being the most trendy person, but she wanted to look good so people would take her music seriously. "Start with what's comfortable," he suggested.

"Good call."

His words seemed to be useful, because from there, Jude got to work. As she put different outfits together and packed them in her two suitcases, they continued to talk. Just before two o'clock in the morning, Tommy's eyes were closed and he was on the verge of falling asleep when Jude confessed that she was scared.

"What if I can't do it anymore? What if they don't like me?"

Tommy realized that she thought he was asleep and decided to listen rather than make his awareness known. This was the most vulnerable she had been with him in nearly two months, and he wasn't going to pass up an opportunity to get closer, even if she didn't know he could hear.

"Why is it that you seem to bring out the best in my music?"

He could hear her get up and begin to pick up a few of the things left around her room. Thankfully, her conversation didn't stop. It did, however, transform into more of a pep-talk to herself.

"That's why you're doing the tour, Jude. You need to get away. This is the chance to walk away and be happy and carefree. For far too long you have been hung up on him and now you can break away from that."

There was a pause, and Tommy worried that she was going to stop. Though much of what she was saying was exactly what Kwest had told him, it was different coming from her lips. As she continued to speak softly to herself, her voice faltered. Wanting nothing more than to leap up and hold her in his arms, Tommy restrained himself. He knew that doing that would get him nowhere. In fact, Jude would probably be furious that he was awake and would kick him out of her place. Wanting to be close to her as long as she would allow, Tommy concentrated on keeping his eyes closed and listened to what she was saying.

"Loving Tom Quincy leads to heartache, and my heart already hurts too much as it is. Distance will be good for now, and when I come back, maybe we can really be friends…without the butterflies and foolish, naive hope."

Tommy heard what he thought was a blanket being unfurled, and was surprised to feel its weight cover him. Trying hard not to smile and give away his awareness, he held still until he heard her step away. Letting out the breath that he had been holding, he heard her unfurl another blanket, and ventured to sneak a look at her.

Curled up in the big armchair near her window, Jude had a blanket covering her as she drifted off. Thinking back to her words, an ache developed in his lower abdomen. He hated that he hurt her so much. He hated that she had lost hope in their future. He hated that she didn't believe in his love for her.

More than ever he was determined to make her see that she was it for him. Over the next month, he would spend every day proving that he cared and loved her. If he thought it would help, he would buy a ring tomorrow morning and propose before she left. But Tommy knew that she didn't trust him yet. First, he had to build and strengthen their friendship. One day they would be ready for that, but he had a lot of work to do before them.

1 The song Tommy sings is _Loving__You__Tonight_ by Andrew Allen.


	13. Chapter 13

**Hey all,**

**For all of you in the US, I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving...hands down, it is my favorite holiday:) I would have had this up sooner, but I was having some serious computer issues...crashed hard drive and the like.**

**So, here is chapter 13:) I hope you enjoy...you finally get some insight into the tour...see how Jude and Chuck interact and how Tommy handles things. **

**Special thanks to my reviewers from chapter 12 (ISana55 and badinfluenz15)...you guys are a huge encouragement.**

**Enjoy, read, and review:)**

**Chapter 13**

Opening his eyes and squinting at the invasion of light that had taken over her room, Tommy glanced around to ensure that Jude was still asleep. Once he verified that she was out cold, he stood and stretched, grabbing her suitcases from their place on the floor and taking them downstairs. Retrieving his keys from the kitchen countertop, he headed downstairs with the two pieces of luggage and Jude's spare key that hung by her door.

Thankfully, he had an extra change of clothes in his car—a habit he held onto from his Boyz Attack days. Back in Jude's loft, Tommy quickly changed before grabbing a package of pop tarts out of the pantry to begin toasting. Knowing that Jude would have to be to the studio in an hour to do the final checks of the buses, he figured it was about time to get her up.

Entering her room, he found her exactly where she was when he left. Walking over to the large armchair, Tommy knelt down to be level with her face. Placing a sweet kiss on her forehead, he told her, "Jude, time to wake up." Rubbing her arm, he continued talking to her as she slowly came out of a deep sleep. "That's it, girl. Hop in the shower real quick and there will be a pop tart waiting when you're done."

A small smile began to form through the tiredness covering her face. Giving her shoulder one more squeeze, Tommy stood and walked out of the room. Before shutting the door behind him, he decided to give her a bit more incentive to hurry, "If you can be ready to walk in forty-five minutes, we'll get coffee on the way to the studio."

Her eyes shot open at the mention of coffee, and she scrambled to get up and out of the chair. Forty-five minutes later, Jude was walking downstairs, ready to go, purse in hand.

Looking at Tommy, she asked, "Where are my bags?"

"Already in my car. I figured you wouldn't want to leave yours at the studio for the next month. Besides, I have to be there to help with loading the buses, so why not go together?"

For a moment, she didn't say a word and Tommy began to wonder if it had been smart to assume she would want to go with him. But, a soft smile graced her face before responding, "Thank you." Though simple, her words were sincere and honest, making Tom feel a little bit like a hero.

Quickly, the pair made their way to Tom's car in order to grab coffee before hitting the studio. Eventually, they arrived at G Major, much to the obvious chagrin of Chuck, who was loading amps onto the bus in front. As Tommy unloaded Jude's suitcases and put them on the bus she was sharing with her sister and family, Jude went to speak with Darius. The glares he was receiving from Chuck made him slightly giddy, glad that his arrival with Jude caused so much discomfort to the other man.

Over the next few minutes, the rest of the staff, band, and crew arrived, loading and going over final checks for the trip. Tom grabbed a clipboard from Darius to verify that everything was in place and ready to go. Only an hour after arriving, the busses were loaded and the team was ready to go. Waking Blind had just said goodbye and were on their bus, except for Chuck who wanted to "go over some things" with Jude. Tom knew that it was just a ploy to be close to his girl, but he couldn't blame Chuck. Who wouldn't want to spend the next six hours on a bus next to Jude?

The final goodbyes were said and last hugs were given as the group headed off. Tommy stood at the curb to watch the busses until they faded from sight and turned towards the highway. Walking back in the studio, his first stop was Darius' office.

"D, you got a sec?"

Looking at the paperwork before him, Darius seemed to weigh the question in his mind before agreeing. "Sure, come on in."

Walking in and shutting the door behind him, Tommy considered what he was going to ask of his boss. Theoretically, it wasn't that big of a deal, but knowing Darius, it could turn into something ridiculous. "I was wondering if I could maybe use the studio after hours over the next few weeks."

Darius was obviously surprised at his request, but quickly recovered. "Apparently that seems to be all the rage these days." Grabbing a piece of paper that Tommy assumed was the studio schedule, Darius looked it over briefly before nodding his head. "That should be fine, but I gotta ask…why?"

"I just have some things I want to lay down. Since I don't have a studio in my apartment, I thought I could use this one."

"Fine. You still have your key?"

"Yeah…" He hesitated, knowing that it shouldn't be that easy. Darius' attention returned to the papers in front of him, signaling that the meeting was over. Slowly Tom stood, eyes still trained on Darius to see if there was anything else his boss would say. With no response, he turned and opened the door. Just as he was about to close it behind him, he heard his boss' voice.

"Tom?"

"Yeah, D?" He stuck his head back in Darius' office, waiting for what he knew would be the condition to using the studio.

"If there's anything good, we're going to release it."

"But…"

"It will be released."

Knowing that there wasn't much he could do about it, Tommy agreed. "Okay." Leaving the large office, Tommy went to his much smaller office and sat at his desk. He wasn't all that surprised with Darius' condition, and it didn't actually bother him that much. He would just have to make sure that Jude was the first to hear whatever D wanted to release.

Figuring out what his schedule was like for the next few weeks, Tom gathered some things and headed for a studio, ready to get to work. If all went well this afternoon, he could start on _Loving__You__Tonight_ for Jude, maybe get her a rough copy by the end of the week.

…

Pacing back and forth inside the length of the bus, Jude continued to rock Sam in her arms as she waited for Chuck to join her. They had been getting ready to begin their ritual comedy and candy night when Chuck realized that they were out of M & Ms, a necessity for his movie enjoyment. A minute after he left to hit a nearby grocery store, Sam had begun crying, leading to his current position in her arms.

Sadie had joined Kwest and the rest of the band and crew at a local club to unwind after their concert. It had become the routine all around—the band and crew would head out to a club, Sadie would tag along wanting to enjoy herself, and Jude would take care of Sam. She wasn't up for much partying, and she cherished her time with Sam, knowing that once she returned to Toronto, things would be pretty hectic. After the third night of this, Chuck had joined her, bringing _Jackass_ and popcorn with him.

Since then, their routine had continued, checking out different movies and binging on popcorn and candy. Tonight, their movie of choice was _The__Big__Lebowski_, something Chuck had been trying to find since the tour had started two weeks ago.

As she continued to pace, Jude thought about the change in her relationship with Chuck over the last few days. Three nights ago, they had been cuddled together on the couch of the bus she shared with her sister and family. She couldn't remember the movie they had watched, instead their attention had been on each other. They had been talking all night, processing the tour experience thus far and sharing random thoughts that led to interesting conversation. Jude told him how much she loved taking care of Sam, even confessing that she was thinking about getting a dog—something she could take care of. Chuck shared his dream of owning a restaurant in a few years, once he had a few worldwide stadium tours under his belt. That night they talked about music, and how it had the ability to touch souls and change lives.

But, in the midst of their conversation, completely taking Jude by surprise, Chuck had kissed her. A smile crept onto her face at the memory of his sweetness. He told her that he had been waiting to do that for a long time, but he couldn't hold it in any longer. He told her she was beautiful. He told her that he cared about her.

The moment had seemed so surreal, like she was in a fog. But, the moment he leaned in to kiss her again, she knew it was real. Things progressed quickly until they were making out like teenagers. Of course, the fact that she was still technically a teenager didn't matter to him, he just wanted her.

In the three days since then, they often exchanged sweet kisses, held hands, and were seemingly attached at the hip. They shared every meal and worked on music, rarely leaving the other's side. Jude loved that Chuck knew exactly how to make her smile. He knew when to be serious, and when to make her laugh.

Startled by the opening of the bus door, Jude turned to see the current subject of her thoughts walked onto the bus with a paper bag filled to its limit.

"I think I got everything."

"Perfect," she responded, smile still gracing her face. Looking down to verify that her nephew was asleep, Jude headed to the back room that had been reserved for Kwest, Sadie, and Sam. As soon as he was down and she located the baby monitor, Jude made her way back to the front of the bus. Sitting down and settling into Chuck's side, she grabbed the pack of licorice out of the bag on his lap. Normally, it wasn't something she would specifically request, but lately she had been craving it. She refused to acknowledge that it might have something to do with Tommy, instead chalking it up to the unique tour experience.

Pushing aside any possible inkling of a thought about Tommy, Jude relaxed into Chuck's arms to enjoy the movie. Every so often, he would kiss the top of her head or stroke her arm, causing her smile to widen. In moments like these, Jude could actually see herself falling for Chuck. When she was surrounded by him, she was almost able to forget about Tommy.

Almost.

Again, Jude forced herself to ignore thoughts of Tommy and concentrated on the movie in front of her.

The following morning, she was awakened by the smell of fresh coffee. Opening her eyes with a smile on her face, Jude grasped for the cup, drinking greedily when it was placed in her hands.

"What, no thanks?" her current hero asked.

"I'm so sorry!" she responded. "How will I ever repay you?"

"I don't know, but you'll have to try hard. I'm pretty hurt." He put a hand over his chest in mock pain.

"You poor thing…" Standing up, Jude leaned in to give her savior a kiss. "Thank you." After giving him another simple peck, she sat back down to enjoy her coffee.

"I have to get back to the other bus so we can get out of town, but why don't we grab some food when we stop?"

"That sounds perfect. I'll see you in a bit." Smiling as Chuck left her bus for his band's, Jude continued to sip at her steaming cup. After a few minutes, she looked around the bus, realizing how quiet it was. Kwest was holding Sam near the kitchenette, but Sadie was looking at her with a calculated gaze. Since she and Chuck had been more open with the physical side of their relationship, Sadie had been constantly questioning if Jude knew what she was doing. This morning's conversation would be no different, and she wanted to get it over with as soon as possible.

"Yes, Sadie?" she asked, eyes closed to minimize her irritation as soon as possible.

"Jude…"

"Just say your piece, Sadie. We have a ton to do for the concert tonight, and I would like to enjoy the rest of my coffee." Jude knew that the sigh her sister let escape would be accompanied by an eye roll. She waited until Sadie found her words, continuing to sip the large coffee in her hands.

"Jude, are you sure you know what you're doing with Chuck? I mean, up until a few weeks ago, you were still broken up about Tommy." Jude's lack of response prompted a disgruntled Sadie to groan, "Ugh! Jude, don't think I don't hear you playing at night."

"Sadie, of course I play at night. I'm doing shows on this tour too…it seems like that is the only time I have to myself these days."

"I get that, but what about Tom?"

"What about him, Sadie? We're friends."

"You know its more than that, Jude."

"Do I?"

"Yeah, you know he cares."

She was sick of this. At some point every day they would have the same argument, and towards the end of their conversation, Jude would get frustrated. Sadie didn't get it…she just didn't understand how hard it was, and she didn't understand how much Jude just wanted to move on. "Really? Sure, he cares…we're friends. And yes, I used to love him. But I know that we can't do that. We won't work, and no matter how much I wish we did, we don't. Chuck is great and he cares about me. I am finally starting to feel happy again, and I'm not going to have you ruin that! We are done with this conversation!"

"But…"

"And don't bring it up again, Sadie…I'm serious!" Jude set her coffee beside her and stood. She was furious with Sadie…she just kept interfering. Making her way to her bunk, Jude grabbed her laptop and headphones. There was work to be done, schedules to be verified, and songs to be reviewed. Sitting back down on the couch, she wrapped a blanket around her and opened her computer. Her first action was to open her music to provide a distraction from her sister. She clicked on the song at the top of the "Most Played" list, refusing to acknowledge that it had become her routine.

The following days held more of the same: Jude and Chuck were inseparable. However, in one of their few moments apart while he was rehearsing and she was looking over the concert venue, Jude was talking with Spied. He had called asking for her input on a song he was working on with SME, but once they had figured out the right wording for the hook, they moved on to how the tour was going and what was happening in Toronto.

"So, dude…how is getting over Tommy going?"

"Great!" Jude replied with a somewhat forced enthusiasm. "Chuck has been amazing and so sweet."

"But what about getting over Quincy? Just 'cause your hanging out with Chuck doesn't mean that you're over him."

For someone who acted like he was five most of the time, Jude was surprised by her friend's insight. "I know, but Chuck helps…" Her statement was left somewhat open-ended, not sure what else to say. She knew Spied was right, and even though she had been trying to ignore it, she still missed Tommy.

"But it doesn't go away, does it?"

She wanted to be upset, but she knew that he was only looking for honesty. Before answering, Jude looked around to make sure that she was by herself. This was not the conversation she wanted anyone listening in on. Seeing a few tech guys to her right and a couple of local radio personalities to her left, Jude stood to move somewhere more conducive to this private conversation. Despite the cold weather, she went outside and found a spot in the corner of the parking lot. Though not beautiful, it was secluded, and that was all that mattered in the moment.

"No, Spied. Not even close."

"Lisa, what am I gonna do with you?" She could hear him sigh before asking, "Wanna tell me about it?"

At first, she was going to brush it off in hopes that ignoring the ever-present ache in her gut meant it would eventually go away, but the concern in his voice was obvious. "It's hell…"

"Jude…"

One word was all it took for the tears to begin. As they rolled down her face, Jude explained how hard it had been. "I haven't stopped thinking about him, regardless of the fact that I haven't spoken to him since the morning we left. This tour was supposed to be my chance to purge him from my system, ya know? I was gonna get over him and be able to move on…just be friends without all of the sexual tension and repressed feelings."

"It's not working so well?"

"No!" The single word was yelled not in anger, but in frustration. "I still want him…almost more than ever. I literally can't sleep because I can't stop thinking about him. It's like he's ingrained into my soul." Speaking out the truth that had been hidden in her thoughts since the tour began brought Jude a sense of freedom, quickly followed by panic. Those thoughts were supposed to be reserved for sleepless nights spent huddled over her journal trying to write him out of her system. "What if I can't get away from him ever? What if I'm destined to be in love with him forever, regardless of how much it hurts?"

After a pause to catch some of the drops falling from her face, Jude took a deep breath. Now that she started, she was kind of on a roll. It felt good to release some of the emotions she had kept to herself for so long. And truly, if anyone would understand and be there for her, it would be Spied. "There's a part of me that wants to write him off forever—tell him to forget it and never speak to him again. But, there's the other side of me that wants nothing more than to call him and tell him to come get me so we can run away together. Spied, what do I do?"

No words were spoken for a few minutes, Spied and Jude each lost in their own thoughts. "Maybe you should face it," he told her eventually.

"Face it?" What did he mean by that?

"Yeah. I mean, obviously ignoring him isn't working. Maybe its time to see what could happen...give things a real chance...be honest with him."

She knew he was right, but that didn't make it easy. "But what if I tell him how I feel and he doesn't care...what if I tell him I love him and he's moved on?" A chuckle came from Spied's side of the phone call, prompting Jude to ask, "What? Why are you laughing in the face of my misery?"

"Jude, I don't think Tom Quincy will ever _**not**_ care about you. I know you're totally freaked out about getting hurt, but you kind of have to get over it."

"But...What if..."

Not allowing her to finish, Spied interrupted. "Jude, you can't keep playing the 'what if' game. Yeah, you might get hurt, and yeah, that sucks. But, it could be spectacular."

Allowing his words to sink in, Jude didn't say anything for a few minutes. She knew that her relationship with Tommy had the potential to be have a fairytale love story. But, because of their connection and fiery personalities, it also had the possibility of being a complete disaster, consuming both of them in a fire of hurt and disappointment. And, Jude knew that if that were to happen, she would never recover. "Maybe you're right."

"Come on, dude. You know I'm right! I'm always right." He paused for a second, but Jude could tell he still wanted to say something. Eventually, he spoke, telling her, "Dude, I know it's hard, but I don't think you should be doing this thing with Chuck. You aren't being honest with him, let alone yourself." When his comment was met with silence on Jude's part, he continued, simply telling her, "You know I'm always here for you, Jude. And no matter what, you can always count on me."

"I know, Spied. And I know what you're saying about Chuck, but I like that he can make me smile in the midst of the confusion that surrounds Tom Quincy."

"I know, Dude. And you deserve to smile."

His response brought a genuine smile to her face. How could she not after a comment like that from her best friend? He knew what she needed to hear, and he knew when he needed to back off. "Thanks." Knowing she had to get back to work, Jude sighed. "Spied, I should probably get going. Kwest needs help with the sound check for the band and I have to run through my set."

"No worries, I totally get it."

"Thanks." Ready to say goodbye, Jude paused for a moment, lost in her thoughts wondering if Spied would ever understand how grateful she was for his friendship. But, rather than focus on that, she wanted to end their conversation on more of a light note. "By the way Spied...'spectacular'? Such a girly word for you..."

"Yeah, yeah. Shut it, Harrison. Maybe I read an article or two from one of Karma's magazine...but that isn't any of your concern. Never speak of that again...okay?"

"You got it. I'll talk to you later, 'kay?"

"For sure. Let me know how the show goes."

"Will do." She hung up the phone, still smiling from her conversation. Though she didn't want to admit it, she knew that what she was doing with Chuck wasn't fair to him, not when she was obviously still hung up on Tommy. But, was she really ready to lay it all on the line for Tom Quincy once again? She loved him, but was she ready to open herself up to the possibility of being hurt by him?

With the questions swirling in her mind, Jude stood, knowing that she had to get to work. Making her way to the back door of the venue, she attempted to focus on what needed to be done for the night. As she went through her mental list of what songs she would be performing, she realized that most of them were related to Tommy in some way or another. Stopping herself from exploring that train of thought, Jude shook her head took a deep breath. There were things to be done, and she couldn't get lost in thoughts of Tom Quincy.

After she was done performing, Jude asked her brother-in-law if it would be okay if she left for the night. Since talking to Spied earlier in the day, Jude hadn't been able to focus on much of anything. And, while she would usually stay to watch Waking Blind's set, tonight she wasn't up to it. After taking a walk around town, Jude found herself back at the bus. After relieving Sadie and agreeing to watch Sam for the night, she laid down in her bunk, pulled out her laptop and headphones and listened to Tommy's music on repeat for the next hour, contemplating what to do next.

Being with Chuck wasn't going to work, regardless of how much she liked his company and the distraction he provided. They still had over a week until the tour was over and they were home, Jude just wasn't sure how to handle things moving forward. She failed to notice the bus doors opening, but was startled when the curtain to her bunk was flung open by her sister.

"Kwest and I are pretty much ready to go, I just wanted to let you know."

Jude realized that the concert must have wrapped up, and now everyone was heading to whatever local bar had been chosen as the watering hole for the night. "Ok, Sades. Have fun." She got up and went back to Kwest and Sadie's room to retrieve her nephew. "Hey buddy. How are you?"

Carrying him back to her bunk, Jude held him in her arms as she continued to listen to music. In no more than ten minutes, he fell asleep, and Jude would have as well if it hadn't been for Chuck interrupting the quiet bus.

Coming over to where she was still laying on her bunk, he asked, "What's going on? I though you were gonna bring Sam over to the band's bus so we could play Rock Band."

"Yeah…" Being lost in her thoughts the past few hours caused Jude to forget all about her plans with Chuck. In addition, her recent decision to break things off with him meant not spending too much time with him, especially alone. "Sorry, but I'm pretty wiped out tonight. I think I'm just going to lay him down and get to sleep. We'll do it later though, 'kay?" Really, she had no intention to follow through with that unless the rest of the band was there, but this wasn't the time to get into that. The conversation that really needed to take place would happen later, when Jude knew exactly what she wanted to say and could tell Chuck how she felt without hurting him.

"Why don't you go out with everyone tonight? You haven't done that since the tour started." It was true that Chuck hadn't gone out since they started their movie nights, but that wasn't why Jude suggested he go. She knew that everyone would be just getting ready to head out, and it was the best way to get him to leave since she wanted to be alone.

The look he gave her held some confusion, but it was quickly brushed aside when he nodded his head in agreement. "Not a bad idea, Harrison. I'll see you tomorrow." Leaning down, he kissed her forehead, a gesture that brought a smile to Jude's lips.

No matter what happened with Tommy, Jude knew that Chuck cared about her, and it was a comforting fact. After goodbyes were exchanged, near-silence enveloped the bus yet again, the little puffs of Sam's breathing being the only sound. Sighing, Jude ignored the idea that she should figure out what to say to Chuck, instead embracing the little boy still sound asleep in her arms and kissing the top of his head. Figuring out what to do with Chuck and Tommy could happen tomorrow. Right now, she needed comfort.

Scrolling through the movies she had stored on her laptop, the cursor landed on _Sabrina_. _Perfect_, she thought. Setting her computer in the corner of her bunk, Jude carefully got under the covers, making sure not to disturb Sam, and laid down. Half-way through the movie, she had fallen asleep, memories of good times with Tommy swirling.


	14. Chapter 14

**Hey guys... I am SOOO sorry for the delay! Between work and finals, things got a bit hectic and crazy and I was unable to post. Here is chapter 14...I hope you guys enjoy. Remember to send those reviews my way...they are such an encouragement!**

**Chapter 14**

Jude was surprised to awaken to a silent bus. The night before had been the last concert of the mini-tour, and now they were headed home. It would take about 3 days to get there, but Jude was beyond ready. The past week she had spent most of her energy trying to avoid Chuck, still not sure what to tell him. She knew that eventually she would have to say something, but she was being a coward. Maybe by avoiding him, he would get the hint and not push her.

But, the conversation was bound to happen eventually. And, as Jude got out of her bunk with the single focus of getting coffee, she was surprised to see Chuck on one of the couches.

"Get some coffee and sit. We need to talk."

Not saying a word, Jude just nodded her head and grabbed a mug from one of the cabinets. It seemed as though the inevitable conversation was happening now. Taking a deep breath, she sat on the couch opposite him and took a long sip from her mug. "What's up?"

At her question, his eyebrows raised. He didn't speak for a moment, but soon responded with a question of his own. "What's up? That's all you're going to ask?"

Unsure as to how she should respond, Jude shrugged her shoulders. Taking another sip of her coffee, she closed her eyes and relished the taste, knowing that this would not be a fun conversation. Just then, she realized that they were alone on the bus. Opening her eyes and looking around, she verified that the door to the back bedroom room was open, and Kwest, Sadie, and Sam were nowhere to be found. She began to ask Chuck if he knew where they were, but he interrupted her.

"Your sister and Kwest went over to the band's bus for breakfast and took Sam with them. We aren't scheduled to stop for another hour, so there are no excuses. We are going to talk."

"Okay."

"Okay? That's all you say?"

Sighing, Jude nodded her head again. "Yeah. I know that I've been off this last week, and I knew this conversation was coming, I just wasn't sure what to say."

"Well, let's start with why you're ignoring me."

"I haven't been ignoring you!" Jude exclaimed. Of course, that was a complete lie. She had been avoiding him like the plague, unsure of how to interact with him since she acknowledged that her feelings for Tommy wouldn't just go away.

"Yeah, you have. Jude, anytime I come within ten feet of you, you either go the opposite direction, or you start talking to whoever is closest. A week ago things were fine. What the hell happened?"

"I don't know…" Her response was quiet, her voice low with uncertainty.

"Yeah, you do, Jude. Its obvious that something is going on, and I want to know what it is."

His tone was sincere, and his eyes conveyed a bit of the confusion and hurt he must be feeling. Knowing that she needed to explain everything, Jude wondered how to do so without hurting him. Chuck had been so amazing over the last few months—he had taken such good care of her, been her anchor when things got crazy. But, she needed to be honest. "We were having fun, right?"

"We were until you got all weird."

Biting her lip in confusion as to what she should say, Jude sat quietly for a few moments. Eventually, she looked up. "I guess…last week…no, see…" The words wouldn't seem to come easily, no matter how she started. "Ugh!" she yelled, frustrated with her lack of words.

"Just tell me what's going on, Jude."

Looking down into her almost-empty cup, she whispered, "I don't want you to be mad." She could hear him sigh, but didn't want to look at him for fear of seeing him disappointed in her.

"Jude, I can't promise I won't be mad, but I promise to listen."

"I don't want to lose your friendship."

"I may be mad, honey, but that doesn't mean we won't still be friends."

"Promise?" Over the years, Jude had lost a few people close to her, and she didn't want her friendship with Chuck to be another casualty.

"I promise. Now tell me what's going on."

"Last week, I was talking to Spied and he thought I wasn't as "over" Tommy as maybe everyone thought."

"Is he right?"

"I think so." Her voice was still soft, not having the energy or desire to raise it. "I'll be honest, part of the reason I came on this tour was to get away from him. Obviously, my music was the most important reason…getting out there and performing again…but I figured that I could get away from Tommy and finally move on. Maybe if I wasn't around him constantly, I could forget, ya know?" Though he didn't give a verbal response, Jude saw Chuck nod his head in understanding. Knowing that she had to finish what she was saying, she continued speaking. "But, it hasn't worked so well. I mean, yeah, I have had an amazing time. And don't for a second think that I haven't loved being with you."

"But you can't be with me when there are still feelings there for Tom."

"Exactly…" She wasn't sure what to say next. Would he want to hear how much Tom was a part of her heart, her soul? Would he want to know that she still had a lot of thinking to do and that she wouldn't be calling Tommy the moment he walked off the bus?

"Have you known all along or was this some new revelation? Did you plan on using me as a distraction?" Though his voice hadn't risen in volume, it was much more harsh.

Looking up, Jude could see Chuck's brow furrowed in a hint of anger. "Chuck! You have to know I wouldn't do that…at least not intentionally! I didn't want to admit that I am still drawn to Tommy…that he still affects me. I hate that I am so weak and so dependent upon him. I hate that he could leave without a trace for a year-and-a-half, and the minute he came back, I wanted to hold onto him and never let go…" At this point, tears were rolling down her face. Jude didn't know when they had started, but she wasn't surprised. Since talking to Spied, she had been on an emotional roller coaster. She attributed to not having anyone to really talk to, but it was started to make her crazy nonetheless.

"Jude, I get that you didn't mean to, buy you still used me…and then you ignored me!"

"I know." It wasn't like she could give him excuses, she had none. "Chuck, I honestly thought that by getting some distance between myself and Tommy, I would be fine. We left on a good note, and all I wanted was to come back from this tour able to be his friend and nothing more. I was having such an amazing time with you, and you have to know I care so much about you. I wanted to fall for you…and I was, I just…"

"Fell for him first."

The anger was gone from his voice, but Jude knew that he wasn't okay. "I'm sorry, Chuck. So sorry."

"I know, but it doesn't change the fact that it hurts." He stood and walked across the small bus to stand in front of her. Putting a hand on her cheek and cupping it ever so softly, he told her, "Jude Harrison, you drive me nuts, but it doesn't change the fact that you are one of my closest friends." Kissing her on the forehead, he then walked back over to his previous seat. Grabbing his iPod from a jacket pocket, he began to untangle the headphones. Before putting them on, he looked up at Jude. "Honey, I'm pretty bummed about all of this…but more because you didn't tell me and ignored me. Let me be angry for a little while, and then we'll be fine."

As much as it hurt, she understood. Regardless of what happened with Tommy, Jude still wanted Chuck's friendship. Standing, she whispered, "I am sorry," and went to her bunk. Climbing under the covers, she closed her eyes, letting the silent tears fall down her face.

Drifting off to sleep, Jude thought that maybe it was time to acknowledge what had been in her heart from the beginning—she loved Tom Quincy. Should she take Spied's advice and go for it? Would she end up heartbroken, yet again? Despite the questions racing and confusion clogging her mind, Jude was able to fall into a restless slumber.

When she woke up hours later, Chuck was gone, and Sadie, Kwest, and Sam were back. They knew what had happened—that much was obvious by the pity-filled looks on their faces. Nonetheless, Jude walked straight up to her sister, just needing to feel her support.

After a few minutes, the pair separated. "Jude," Sadie started to speak.

"No, Sadie. I don't want to talk about it, I just needed a hug. Can I steal my nephew for a bit?" Talking about it wouldn't make things easier and it wouldn't make the persistent ache in her chest go away. She still wasn't sure if the pain she felt was due to hurting Chuck or if it was anxiety over what would happen with Tommy, but it didn't really matter. In this moment, all she wanted was to glean some joy from her beautiful nephew.

Her sister handed Jude Sam, not saying another word. Taking her nephew to the couch, she began to play with him, at least as much as she could being that he was still only about six weeks old. He was an innocent, and that was what Jude needed at the moment. She didn't want to think about what to do when she got home, and she certainly didn't feel like talking about her confusion.

Soon, the bus stopped for the night, and everyone unloaded their things and headed for the hotel. Watching everyone walk away left Jude feeling lonely, but she was determined to really understand her feelings when the tour was over, and that meant she only had two days left. Rather than joining everyone for a night in the hotel, Jude grabbed the comforter off her bunk and sat in the middle of the floor. Opening her journal, she let her thought flow free, writing whatever came to mind.

It seemed as though once she left her inhibitions behind and allowed herself to write everything she felt, Jude was on a roll. Rarely taking a break for anything other than coffee, she wrote nonstop for the next two days. Eventually, she knew that they were getting close to home, she could almost feel herself being drawn to him. Glancing up to get a better idea of where they were, Jude saw a sign noting the kilometers to Toronto, and was struck with the memory of a few years ago. Coming home from her first tour she had seen the very same sign, inspiring yet another Tommy-centric song, _White_ _Lines_. She still hadn't really let him see it. Once, just before he left, she saw him looking through her journal, but she had snatched it away before he could really sink himself into the song.

But, rather than focus on that, Jude instead turned back to her current journal. She was in the middle of something beautiful, she could feel it in her bones. Finally coming to some conclusions about how to handle things with Tommy—what her heart wanted and where to go from here—Jude's writing had began to form more coherent thoughts, eventually transforming into lyrics. Already, she had three songs nearly completed, but this one she was working on was the best. It was everything an amazing ballad should be—inspirational, moving, powerful, raw, honest—in a word, it would be epic.

Her desire to finish the song before arriving home was somewhat unfounded. She wouldn't show it to anyone until the timing was right, and who knew when that would be. Regardless, she felt like it was the last step she needed to take before she could fully move forward, and that was all she wanted to do.

Looking over the words one last time, Jude allowed a soft smile to make its way onto her face. Finally complete, the song held the journey of her heart over the last few months. Closing her journal and standing to stretch, she was somewhat surprised to see that they were pulling onto Queens St. W, only three blocks from G Major.

As the buses pulled up to the curb beside the studio, Jude couldn't contain her smile any longer. It felt good to be home, even though there had been some heartache along the way. Stepping off the bus, she first person she laid eyes on made her heart seem lighter. "Spied!" Running up to him, she wrapped her arms around him. In the midst of everything, he had been her sounding board and her rock. Pulling back from him, she looked him in the eye, "Thank you. Honestly Spied, I don't know what I would do without your wisdom and support the past few weeks."

"I'm always here for you, Jude. Now, I want to hear all about the tour, but we have to get these buses unloaded…wanna do dinner sometime soon?"

"Perfect. Is Karma okay with that?"

"You know she is…she knows you're my Lisa." With a grin, he gave her one last quick hug. "Dinner tomorrow?" he asked as he walked away.

"Sounds great. We'll talk then."

With a thumb's up, he was off. Jude turned to help her sister with all of Sam's things, helping to unload her bus after. As soon as things were cleaned up an hour later she went inside, not sure how she should get home. Her car wasn't at the studio because Tommy had driven her there before the tour. She had caught a glimpse of him as the buses arrived, but in the flurry of activity, she had lost track of him.

Walking into the studio, she looked around the lobby, still with no sight of Tommy. Walking further into the building, Jude passed each of the studios, glancing in each of them before moving on to the next. Eventually, she made her way to the offices, noticing how empty things were. It was rare to have hardly anyone around, even Darius was gone. Being that Tommy's office was towards the end of the hallway, it was one of the last places Jude had come to.

If she didn't find Tommy there, she would have had to call a cab, and she didn't want to sit in a smelly cab the same night she got off of a smelly bus. Thankfully, the door was open, and Jude peeked her head around the corner, seeing Tommy sitting at his desk. She had obviously made a sound, because not a second later he looked up.

"Hey, you need a ride home?" he asked.

Grateful that he seemed so willing, Jude nodded her head. "If you don't mind..."

"Not at all! Let me shut down my computer and grab my stuff from the studio. Meet you by the car?"

"Sounds good." Jude turned and walked toward the back door. Since she hadn't spoken to him the entire four weeks of the tour, Jude wasn't sure how Tommy would react to her need for a ride. Part of her had been nervous that he wouldn't want to even talk to her, let alone drive her home, but she was truly thankful for his easy-going attitude.

While she had cooped herself up on the bus the last few days of tour, Jude had decided to take things day by day with Tommy. She wasn't going to tell him about the conversation she had with Chuck, and she certainly wasn't going tell him that she still loved him.

Startled out of her thoughts by the jingling of keys in Tommy's hands, Jude turned to face him. "Thanks again, Tommy."

"Hey, you got it girl."

He gave her the smile that made her stomach clench and her throat close, but she tried to ignore her body's natural reaction and got into the car. As they drove out of G Major's parking lot, the car was quiet. Jude wasn't sure where to start and what to say. Though Tommy and her had always been close, she felt like they were on an awkward first date.

"So, tell me about tour. How was it being back on stage?"

They were nearly half way to her building, and Jude was thoroughly relieved that he had initiated the conversation. And, talking about the tour would be an easy place to start. "Amazing. Honestly, I knew that I missed it, but I didn't realize how incredible it would feel!" She knew that she was gushing, but she couldn't help it. The performing aspect of tour had been exactly what she hoped it would be.

"I'm so glad! Did you like performing for the smaller crowds?"

While some people might have taken his question to be an underhanded dig at the small size of venues she had been performing at, Jude knew that he was genuinely curious. "I actually loved it. I loved getting to know the crowd, ya know? It felt so much more personal..."

"I know what you mean. The small clubs were always my favorite. It's almost intimate, right?"

"Exactly." Of anyone in her life, in the music industry or not, Tommy understood her the most. "It makes seriously re-think the value of big stadium tours. I mean, I know they are great and can make insane amounts of cash, but I would love to do something like this for my next tour."

"Next tour, huh?"

With a shy smile, Jude nodded her head. "Yeah." On tour, especially the last few days as she was evaluating her life, Jude knew that she wanted to fully get back to her music. She wanted to start production on her own album, and yes, she was already thinking about another tour.

"Harrison, I would expect nothing less. Any chance I'll get to hear the new material?"

"Of course!" Looking at her hands, she paused, not sure how he would feel about her next statement. "I was hoping you would co-produce with me." Another of her decisions in the last few days was in regards to how she wanted to make music. Not only was Tommy an amazing producer, but their chemistry made him the perfect producer for her.

"Are you serious, girl?"

She couldn't tell if he liked the idea or not, so she simply affirmed what she had said a moment before.

"I would be honored. Truly honored, Jude."

"Good!" Relieved, Jude smiled and turned to face Tommy more fully. "So, tell me about life in Toronto since I was gone."

"It's been...strange."

"Strange? What does that mean?"

"I don't know...I guess it's been lonely. You were gone, Kwest was gone...I didn't have anyone to hang out with."

"You poor baby... I'm sure you found someone to occupy your time with." Though he had been less of a playboy in recent years, Tommy had always been one with women constantly falling all over him. Jude was sure that it would have been easy to find willing women if he was too lonely.

"As a matter of fact, I kind of did."

At his words, her heart dropped. Why was it that as soon as she was ready to explore things with him, Tommy would move on and find someone else? Despite the complete ache taking over her body, Jude knew that she had to respond. "Good for you." As hard as it was to say those three little words, Jude couldn't continue speaking.

Lost in the pain that quickly began to consume her, Jude was startled when her hand was clasped by Tommy's much larger one.

"Jude..."

His tone was insistent, but she wasn't sure how to speak when her vocal chords seemed to lose the ability to function. Eventually she looked up, startled to see that they were stopped in front of her building. Glancing at Tommy from under her eyelashes, she still didn't say a word.

"Her name is Sasha, and she's the most adorable thing you've ever seen. She's already over twenty pounds and she was born a little over two months ago."

Her reaction made it obvious that she thought he was talking about a woman. But it was clear that Tommy was talking about an animal—a dog from what she could tell. "Sasha, huh?"

"Yep. She's beautiful, and such a good dog too. We already started training classes and she's smart. I want you to meet her, but she hasn't gotten along with any women yet."

"Really? Well, I do want to meet her, even if she doesn't like me. Do you have a picture?" Jude was amazed at this new development in the life of Tom Quincy. He had always been one to like freedom and flexibility, but a dog meant that he was tied down to a certain extent. Taking out his phone, Tommy showed her a picture of him with a white ball of fluff she knew to be Sasha. "You're right, she's gorgeous."

Flipping through the pictures he had, she smiled at how cute they were. Trying to be subtle in her questioning, she asked, "A dog, huh? Doesn't that mean you're kind of tied down?"

"I guess, but why would I want to leave Toronto? It has everything I need and everything I want."

His response caused her smile to grow. She couldn't help but hope that she was part of everything he wanted and needed. Trying to stifle a yawn, Jude turned her head to the side. She was enjoying her time with Tom and didn't want to leave. But, the tour had taken a lot out of her and she seriously needed some sleep.

"Nice try, Harrison, but I saw that yawn." Taking his phone back, Tommy opened his door and nearly jumped out of the car. Not a second later, it seemed, he was at her door, helping her out of the car and grabbing her bag from its place behind the seat. "I think you need to catch up on your sleep, but why don't I pick you up for work tomorrow. I don't have to be in until two, so that should give you ample time to sleep in."

"That sounds perfect." She reached for her bag, but Tommy held it out of reach. Motioning for her to go ahead of him, he put a hand on her lower back. She relished his touch, loving that he was such a gentleman with her.

Quickly they made their way up the stairs and to her door. After she opened it and tossed her bag inside, she turned to thank Tommy, embracing him in a more than friendly hug.

Her cheeks flushed as he whispered, "I missed you, Jude. I'm glad you're home." With that, he turned, making his way down the stair and out to his car. Closing her door after he disappeared, Jude couldn't help but close her eyes. She tried to recall the perfection of being in his arms, loving how secure and right it was.

After a minute, she opened her eyes and let out a deep sigh. She had to take things one day at a time, and it should start with getting some rest. Picking up her bag, she headed upstairs to her room, barely changing her clothes before falling on the bed. Soon, she fell into a sleep filled with dreams of Tommy.

The following day, Jude didn't wake up until noon, but felt refreshed and ready to go after sleeping for nearly fifteen hours straight. After taking a long and relaxing shower, she got ready for the day and waited for Tommy to swing by and pick her up. At 1:30pm on the dot, she heard a car pull up outside her building. Looking out the window, she caught a glimpse of Tommy's Hummer. She decided to meet him halfway, so grabbed her purse and went out the door. Locking up, she started to head downstairs, nearly running into him on the second floor.

After greeting each other with a hug and a smile, Tommy asked if she wanted to grab some coffee before heading into the studio.

"Do you not know me at all, Quincy? When do I not want coffee?"

"True story, Harrison. You have everything? No guitar?"

"Yeah. I have to talk to D about some things and I want to see how Waking Blind is doing on the industry charts. I don't think I'll have time to do any playing."

"That makes sense. Meeting with D?"

"Yeah, I want to talk to him about my album and moving forward. I also wanted to bring up the possibility of doing some local shows. You know, perform at The Drake or the Mod Club, maybe do some acoustic shows… I'm still thinking it all through, but it seems like the best way to start."

"For sure. That does seem like a good way to start, especially if you got to perform at some of those venues. I'm excited for you, but I really can't wait to get started on your album."

She loved that he was so excited about her music, his support always gave her confidence in her talent. As they walked out of the building and towards the car, Jude could only smile. She was glad to be getting back to the studio, and thrilled to be doing so with Tommy.

As she was about to open her door, Tommy placed a hand over hers to stop her actions. "Hang on…"

"What's up?"

"Well, since you told me you would want to meet Sasha, I decided to bring her along today. Is that okay?"

He looked almost shy as he told her about the new addition to his life. It was precious how he seemed to be nervous to introduce her to Sasha, but that made sense if the dog didn't tend to like other women. "That's rad. Is she in back?"

"Yep. Come around this way." Grabbing her hand, he led her to the back of the car and prepared to open the trunk. "Maybe stand over there so we don't startle her too much."

"Okay."

"Hey Sash," Tommy called out. The car moved slightly and Jude could make out the dog through the tinted windows of the Hummer. He slowly opened the back door, talking in a soothing voice the entire time. When the door was fully opened, Sasha hopped out of the car and began to dance around in her excitement to be free from the confines of the car. After taking a minute to shower his newest girl with attention, Tommy told Jude to come closer slowly.

The night before when he was driving her home, he told her that Sasha would tend to growl at women who got close, so Jude was prepared for some intensity. However, as Jude approached the dog, she only looked on in mild curiosity. "I think I'm passing the test," she told Tommy.

"I think you are," he responded, looking up to meet her gaze. Both refocused their attention on the dog, and Tommy continued talking to her, "Sash, this is Jude. Remember I told you about her? I want you to be nice to her, okay?"

"You talk about me to your dog, Quince?" Carefully, she bent down bringing her eye-to-eye with Sasha.

Putting her hand out, Jude allowed the dog to become familiar with her scent before rubbing the top of her head. "Hey, Sasha. Quincy was right, you are beautiful!" Still rubbing the top of the dog's head, Jude turned to Tommy. "Am I mistaken or does Sasha like me?" At her question, the dog nuzzled her head into Jude's knee, clearly liking the attention of her new friend.

"She does. It's kind of crazy, she hasn't taken to anyone like that except Kwest; and really it's 'cause he brought a treat with him when we picked her up."

"I guess I'm just that special, huh?"

"I won't argue with that, girl."

Though his comment was probably meant as something casual and friendly, Jude couldn't stop her heart from fluttering slightly. Trying to dispel those kind of dangerous thoughts, she shook her head before looking back to the dog. Sasha had flopped onto the sidewalk and was bearing her belly for Jude to rub. Chuckling at the completely comfortable puppy, Jude decided not to respond Tom's question, instead saying, "As much as I would rather hang out with this beauty, don't you need to get to the studio?"

Sighing, Tommy nodded. "Yeah, I guess we should." Focusing his attention back on the dog, he told her, "Sash, it's time to go. Let's get you in the car."

At the word "car," Sasha roused herself and stood. Giving a quick shake, she walked to the back of the Hummer and jumped into it by herself.

"You were right, she is smart."

"I told you so." Closing the door behind the dog, he led Jude over to the passenger door. "Hop in and let's get to the studio. If we finish early, do you wanna grab dinner? We could grab take-out from our Thai place and go to the park so Sasha can get some exercise. Are you free?"

Not wanting to appear too eager or desperate, Jude attempted to contain her excitement. Instead of jumping for joy and shouting "yes!," she instead nodded her head. "Yeah, that sounds nice." Not saying another word for fear of sounding like a crazy groupie that would stalk Tommy in the days of BoyzAttack, Jude simply climbed into the car.

Tommy followed suit and off they were. Arriving at G Major shortly after, the pair exited the car, Sasha in tow, and headed inside. While Tommy went straight to Studio A, Jude made her way to Darius' office. Thankfully, he was there and the door was open, enabling her to stick her head in and ask for a few minutes.

What she thought would be a conversation lasting a few minutes turned into an hour long discussion about her career, what she wanted long-term, and her musings on the future of music. Walking out of his office around 3:15pm, Jude was stunned. Darius had easily agreed to let her start work on an album, and even allowed her to retain Tommy as part of her team. He told her he would get Portia to set up some small-venue concerts, starting with a show specifically for members of her fan club. They had discussed a few more details, but eventually the conversation turned towards the music industry in general. While Darius had always been profit and "Top 40 Radio" focused, he also acknowledged that there was more to music than commercial hits.

Darius had asked Jude her thoughts on where music was headed. Towards the end of their dialogue, he even dropped the bomb that he wanted to start taking steps away from the industry. He confessed to wanting more time with Maya, the daughter that caused so much drama when she returned with Tommy, and a desire to diversify the interests of the company.

Though there weren't any business changes named as of yet, Jude knew that D was mulling over different ideas, and she was curious to see what would be happening at G Major in the coming months and years. She knew that her boss would take care of her and look out for her, but it would certainly be interesting to see what would happen. Lost in thoughts of G Major business, Jude fell to the ground after running into Spied.

"Hey, Dude! How are you? Feeling better after some serious shut eye?"

Smiling at him after getting back on her feet, she linked her arm with his and began walking with him towards Studio C. "I'm just starting to feel more human."

"Hey, I know we were maybe gonna grab dinner tonight, but can we put that off a day or two? I think it will be a late night for me here, and then I promised Karma I would take her to that new vegan dessert place. Is that okay?"

The excitement of spending time with Tommy later that evening had caused Jude to completely forget her tentative dinner plans with Spied. Trying to play it off as if she hadn't forgotten, Jude simply nodded her head. "Yeah, that should be fine. Just let me know when you're free."

"Thanks, Dude. Now, tell me what tour was like...I want to know everything."

She shared the tour stories of the past month, sharing how it felt to perform and letting him in on a few of the song ideas percolating in her mind. Closing the door to the small recording booth behind her, Jude turned to face him before sinking to the ground. Getting comfortable and crossing her legs in front of her, she waited for his inevitable questions. Of anyone, he knew what she had been through with Tommy, he understood the directions her heart had wandered.

"So, I notice you arrived with Lord Squinty Frown today…wanna tell me what's going on with that?"

Rolling her eyes at his question, Jude simply said, "Nothing." At his inquiring gaze, however, she expanded her statement. "Really, it was nothing. He took me home yesterday and we talked. I mentioned that I wanted to talk to D today, and he offered to bring me into the studio."

Looking at her intently as if to verify that she was telling the truth, Spied eventually nodded his agreement. "I'll buy that, but what about the dog. Anyone who's been at the studio in the past month knows Sasha doesn't get along with any women. She nearly chased Portia out of the studio, and Karma won't come into G Major when she's here." Tilting his head, he continued, "But today, you guys rolled in with Sasha in tow, and the dog didn't seem to bat an eyelash."

"I got an intro earlier when Tommy picked me up. I don't know what to say other than that she's sweet. She didn't seem too crazy to me…" Jude had been a little surprised at how easily the dog seemed to take to her, but she seemed so sweet it was hard to picture her defensive and growling at people.

"Maybe it was meant to be," her friend said, wiggling his eyebrows up and down.

"Oh, shut it, Vincent." She could do without the suggestive comments, struggling enough as it was with her feelings for Tom.

"Dude, that's harsh." He gave her a pout, but Jude knew he was only kidding.

"You're fine, you big baby." Pinching his side, she laughed as Spied jumped from his spot. But as he settled back down next to her, Jude looked over at him. "So, tell me more about the past month. What are you and the guys working on?"

They continued to talk as the afternoon slipped away. Jude showed Spied some of the new songs she had worked on over the tour. She even brought out her journal and allowed him to catch a glimpse of the songs she wrote in seclusion the last few days of the tour. When he flipped to _Saviour_, there were no words and his mouth hung open. He told her it could easily be the first single for her album, and guaranteed it would be a huge hit.

From there, the pair moved on to discussing SME's new music, as well as their personal lives. Spied informed Jude about the twins Kyle and Wally had started dating a couple of weeks ago. Even though it had started as a one-night-adventure in a club, they had started to really like the girls and the foursome had been inseparable the past couple of days. Ignoring the desire this new information brought about to be in a relationship and connected to someone, Jude refocused her attention on music.

Discussing the direction Spied thought the next SME was headed for their next album, Jude began to make a few suggestions, and they were off. At nearly seven that evening, the friends were startled when the door to the sound booth opened. Turing to look at who was interrupting their time, Jude was surprised to see none other than Tom Quincy looking back at her.

"Hey guys." As he nodded to each of them, the door began to open further. Sasha eventually nudged the door open enough to walk through, and went straight over to Jude. Sitting down, the dog laid her head on Jude's leg and looked up with sweet eyes.

Putting her hand on the dog's head, Jude began to rub back and forth. "Hi Sasha. How was your day sweet girl?"

As she paid attention to the dog, Jude ignored the strange look Spied gave her and then Tommy, or the confused glance Tommy gave her.

Shifting slightly so that he was completely in the sound booth, Tommy cleared his throat before asking, "You hungry, girl? I was thinking we could head out soon."

Before she could even formulate a response, Jude's stomach grumbled loudly. It was noticeable enough that Sasha lifted her head to look at what was going on. But, satisfied that there was no immediate threat, her head went right back to Jude's lap.

Smiling at the dog's actions, Jude looked up to Tommy. "Yeah, Spied and I were just fooling around with some ideas."

"Great. Let me just grab a few things from my office and we can go." As he turned to leave, he called for Sasha. But she would have none of it, and simply stayed where she was.

"Don't worry, Quincy, I'll keep an eye on her." Staying seated, Jude continue to lavish attention on her new friend while Spied stood up.

"It seems like dinner wouldn't have worked anyways..." Spied looked at her with raised eyebrows and a reproachful smirk on his lips. Soon though, the smirk turned into a grin, and a small laugh escaped his mouth. "I'm kidding, Jude. I gotta go, but let's grab dinner and jam later this week. It'll be just like old times."

"That sounds great, Spied. Just let me know what you and the guys are up to."

"Will do, dude. See you later."

As he left, she stayed seated and absentmindedly rubbed the top of Sasha's head. Despite not making a big deal about it, she hadn't been completely clueless. Jude had seen the strange looks Tommy and Spied had given her, she just didn't want to harp on it at the moment. From what the two had told her, Sasha didn't bond well with women, but it didn't matter now since she and the dog were buds.

After saying goodbye to Spied, Jude closed her eyes for a moment, reveling in the quiet. Though low key, the day had been amazing. She had so missed her best friend on tour, and just spending time with him had been perfect. In addition, her conversation with Darius had gone well, and she was excited to have a couple of shows on her schedule in the coming weeks. Jude was set to start recording her album the following day, and now, she was off for a relaxing evening with Sasha and Tommy.

With perfect timing, the object of her thoughts entered the sound booth a mere second later. "My girls ready to go?"

The flutter of her heart couldn't be denied, and Jude concentrated all of her attention on breathing in and out. She couldn't allow herself to get carried away by her emotions. Steeling her expression to one more carefree, she looked up at Tommy who had a hand outstretched offering assistance for her to stand.

"Thanks," she told him, testing her voice to ensure there wasn't a hint of the giddiness his words brought about. Content knowing that she managed to hide her emotion, Jude stood and smiled at Tommy. "Let's go…obviously I'm starving!"

Laughing at her statement, Tommy bent to clip a leash on Sasha, and the three quickly exited the studio and were on their way. "Now, I already called ahead, so when we get there it should be ready."

"Perfect," she agreed. As they drove to the restaurant to get their food, Tommy and Jude talked about their respective days. He shared about his time in the studio, complaining that the artists he was working with didn't understand that he had recorded an album before.

Jude laughed at his grumblings, knowing firsthand how that particular band could be. They were the first act she had encouraged Darius to sign and, though they were incredibly talented, they were also a little full of themselves with their recent success. "Just make sure they know you're the one in charge. It may take a while, but they'll get there eventually."

"Yeah, yeah." They pulled up to the front of the restaurant and were both about to get out of the car when Tommy's phone rang.

"You take that and I'll grab the food. Any idea how much it'll be?"

"They already have my card on file, and it should be under your name. Thanks, girl; you're a Godsend."

"You got it." Hopping out of the Hummer, Jude went inside and retrieved their food. She made sure to greet the owner as she left and hopped back in the car. It didn't take more than a minute or two, and the pair were off again on their way to the park.

Despite the cool weather, Jude and Tommy agreed to eat outside. He was prepared and pulled a large blanket from the backseat. After finding an agreeable spot, he unfurled the blanket, and they sat down to enjoy their food. Conversation easily continued and they spent the next hour talking and playing with Sasha.

Around 9:30, Tommy began gathering their trash, and Jude reluctantly got up to help him. "I guess I should be getting home, huh?"

"Yeah. We'll do this again, but you just got back from tour and need to catch up on sleep. Knowing you, the fifteen hours you got last night didn't cut it."

"You may be right about that," Jude replied mid-yawn. As they walked back to the Hummer, Sasha in tow, they continued chatting.

Tommy looked over at her, eyes sparkling in excitement. "Darius told me we'd be working on your album tomorrow."

Her look mimicked his, the excitement obvious. "Yeah, does that work with your other artists?"

"Girl, you know you're my favorite. Even if there was a question, I'd make it work."

For what seemed like the hundredth time that day, her heart fluttered at his words. Rather than kissing him senseless like she wanted, Jude pushed that desire aside and only smiled up at him. She couldn't help that he always made her feel so special, and it made her love him even more. But, regardless of her feelings, Jude knew that she had to take things one step at a time for now. "I'm glad. I can't wait to really get started on this."

All too quickly they had packed up the car and driven home, and Jude was left saying goodbye at her door. The next few days flew by, and her album was off to an amazing start. Though only one song was officially recorded, there were at least five or six ready to go, and song ideas for at least two more albums filled her journal. Despite constant encouragement from Spied, Jude hadn't yet recorded _Saviour,_ not quite ready to share it with Tommy yet.


	15. Chapter 15

**Ahhh! I am so sorry! I meant to get this up last week but life got away from me. For the few of you who reviewed, thank you...it is truly an encouragement!**

**Chapter 15**

Looking through the well-worn pages of her journal, Jude sipped at her coffee and waited for Chuck to show up. Last night, after another evening spent with Tommy, she had decided it was time to try contacting Chuck. She knew he was hurt because of the way she handled things on tour, but she was hopeful that they could repair their friendship.

The bell over the door of the diner rang, and as Jude glanced up, she was met with Chuck's eyes. He was over ten minutes late, and she had started to wonder if he would show up. He made his way to the back of the restaurant and sat across from her, thanking the waitress as she set a coffee in front of him.

"So, what's going on, Jude?"

"First, I wanted to say thanks for agreeing to come down here. I know you've been relaxing after the tour, but I really needed to talk to you."

"Is something wrong?" He truly looked concerned, and Jude was again grateful that, regardless of whatever had happened or not between them, he still had friendly concern.

"No, everything's fine, I just wanted to talk about what happened between us."

Nodding his head, Chuck waited for her to respond after agreeing, "Okay."

"I have to apologize for how things went on tour. You know I was so confused before coming on tour, and I thought that the distance would be the perfect way to gain some clarity. But it didn't work out like that."

His eyes searched hers for answers, obviously unsure of where she would be taking their conversation. "Jude, I already know all of this. Why are you bringing it all up again?"

"I need you to know that I didn't plan on any of this. I never meant to hurt you or use you, and I had such an amazing time with you. I would have loved to forget about Tommy and really start something with you, but it would be impossible." Looking down at her hands, Jude played with the nearly empty cup of coffee. That day on the bus she had told Chuck all of this, but she wanted him to know how true her words were. "I have a lot of shit to work out, but I've figured out that a few things probably won't ever change. Music is the most important thing in my life. Trust is the most important thing in relationships. And last, Tom Quincy is my vice and my salvation, my weakness and my strength. I know if sounds incredibly cheesy, but he is my soul mate. Maybe one day I can find someone else, but right now I am completely tied to him." Taking another deep breath, Jude looked up. "I am so sorry for the way I treated you and how I took advantage of our friendship and your support."

"Jude…"

After she had finished speaking, Jude had looked back down at her hands. She was so worried that he would tell her it didn't matter. Regardless of the promise he made to still be friends, Jude was terrified that her friendship with Chuck would suffer to the point that they wouldn't be able to recover.

"Jude…" His voice was soft, his tone caring. When Jude still didn't look up, he grabbed her hand. With gazes finally met, he told her, "Jude, I get it. Anyone with eyes can see that you and Tommy have some sort of connection. But, since meeting you I saw something that I was instantly drawn to. I loved our time together on tour, but I get that something between us would never work."

"I'm so sorry."

"I know you are." Smiling, he continued speaking. "I was more upset about how things changed than why they did. But honestly, I'm fine. Just promise not to shut me out like that again, okay?"

"I promise. I know I didn't handle it well, I just got so confused and then I didn't know what to do about us…."

"Stop, Jude. I know you're sorry, I forgive you, let's just move on." She nodded in agreement, grateful for his understanding and forgiveness. "I heard through the grapevine that you'll be doing your own album. How is that goin'?"

"Amazing!" she gushed. "We just got started a few days ago, but I think it's my best work yet."

"I can't wait to hear it."

"Maybe I can show you some stuff when we get to the studio." He agreed, bobbing his head up and down. Seeing his excitement, she was encouraged. Wanting to know what he had been up to the past couple of days, she asked how he had been spending his time.

From there, conversation continued, and the pair conversed for the next thirty minutes. They agreed that, though they had some great moments, their "relationship" would have never worked. Sure, they had liked each other, but they were different people with different desires. Chuck wanted world tours and epic performances, she wanted intimate shows with friends, family, and fans. Chuck liked the idea of kisses and physicality, Jude wanted a relationship and all that came with it. However, despite their differences, they were still good friends. The things that connected them before connected them still, and Jude was grateful that their friendship was back on track.

As they proceeded to drink more coffee, Jude noticed that their waitress was checking on their table often. However, it was Chuck who she seemed to be focusing most of her attention on. It was sweet how she was obviously enamored with her friend, but what was even more exciting to Jude was how Chuck seemed to be checking the waitress out. Trying to stifle her laugh at how he was trying to be subtle, Jude took a deep breath.

Checking her phone, Jude noticed it was past the time when she was supposed to be at the studio. With a lull in the conversation, Jude stood. "I'm so sorry, but I totally lost track of time and my call time was fifteen minutes ago."

"Go, go. I'll see you in the studio tomorrow?"

"Yeah, for sure!" She was about to leave, but had a burst of inspiration. Leaning down, she told him, "Maybe Celeste could join you for the next cup?"

Looking at her as if she was crazy, he asked, "Who?"

Rolling her eyes at his cluelessness, she responded, "you know...the cute brunette who continuously refilled your coffee cup while forgetting to fill mine."

The smirk that formed on his face let Jude know that he would indeed be pursuing Celeste the moment she walked out the door. Patting him on the back as she walked out, she told him, "have fun!"

…

A few days later, Jude was at Kwest and Sadie's house for dinner. Tommy was due any minute, invited by his best friend to spend some time together; he had been delayed slightly by their boss requesting to see his and Jude's latest work. Jude was sitting with Sam, loving the time she got with her nephew. Even though she had only been home from tour a week, life had gotten completely crazy. Writing, recording, and co-producing her own album had taken up all of her time, and Jude cherished the moments she shared with the sweet boy in her lap.

Since Sadie was working on dinner and Kwest was grabbing some paperwork from the office upstairs, Jude was left to open the door when she heard a knock. Seeing Tommy on the other side, she smiled and ushered him inside. When he told her that Darius had loved their newest song, her eyes went wide and an "Oh, thank goodness!" escaped her lips. Sam giggled at her dramatic response, bringing an even wider smile to Jude and Tommy's lips.

Moving to the living room, the three were about to sit on the couch when Sadie called that dinner was ready. Changing directions, they headed into the dining room. After setting Sam in his seat, the four friends sat down to eat, truly enjoying each other's company. Midway through the meal, Sadie asked Jude if she would watch Sam for the long weekend. Her and Kwest were going to get away for a few days in order to have some away time to themselves.

"Of course!" Jude told them. "I would love to watch Sam! Do you want me to stay here or should I bring his stuff to my place?"

After they discussed the details of Jude watching Sam, the group finished eating dinner. Soon, Jude left, she was exhausted and needed to be in the studio early the following morning. Though she wasn't recording with Tommy until that afternoon, she had agreed to help Waking Blind work on a new song..

A couple of days later, Jude waved to her sister and brother-in-law as the drove away from her building. In one hand was a diaper bag, and the other was wrapped around her darling nephew. They had also brought over a portable crib, changing table, and three bags worth of clothes for the infant, despite Jude's reminders that they would only be gone for three days.

Regardless, she was excited. On tour, she had loved the time spent with her nephew, and she was excited to have someone else around. Over the past few days, she noticed that everyone around her seemed to be pairing off. Obviously Spied had Karma and Sadie had Kwest, but now Wally and Kyle were dating the twins.

On top of that, Jude had been with Waking Blind the last few mornings, and had to suffer through seeing Riley and Jack being lovey-dovey all the time. Granted, they were engaged, so it was probably a good thing, but it didn't make her singleness any easier. Thankfully, they had decided to put their impending wedding on hold until their schedules calmed down a bit. As much as she wanted to be a supportive friend, Jude knew that being in the midst of wedding planning would completely wreak havoc on her emotions. While Nate was married, his wife was rarely at the studio, allowing Jude to distance that relationship from her normal life. Thankfully, Chuck was not flaunting his burgeoning relationship with Celeste, instead wanting to spend time with her apart from the band and the studio.

With everyone in her life coupling up except for Tommy, it didn't make it any easier to not wish that they were together. Thankfully, the next few days with Sam would be the perfect distraction from her loneliness, and Jude vowed to enjoy it.

As she walked back into her loft, she felt her phone vibrate in her pocket and quickly set the diaper bag down in order to pick up the call while still holding onto Sam.

"Jude? What are you up to right now?"

It was Tommy and, as usual, her heart squeezed when he took the initiative and called her first. It was kind of pathetic, really, but whenever he made the first move in pursuing her, even as friends, it gave her hope that he cared. "Not much. Kwest and Sadie left about five minutes ago, and Sam and I were just deciding what to do the rest of the day."

"Well then, it seems like I have perfect timing."

"Yeah? What do you have planned?"

"I was thinking this would be the perfect time to work on some lyrics."

"Okay..." As much as she loved working with Tommy, a part of her had hoped that he planned something special for them to do together. Trying to push aside those thoughts, she recovered quickly, asking, "Do you want me to meet you at the studio?"

"Nope, if you could just open your door, that would be awesome."

"Open my door?" Jude was confused at his request, but moved toward her door anyways.

"Sooner rather than later would be nice, Jude."

"I'm going, I'm going. What's going on..." Her words trailed off as she opened the door, surprised to see Tommy standing on the other side, coffees, pastries, baguettes, and guitar in hand. For a moment she just stood there, but promptly hung up her phone and put it in her pocket to help. Granted, with Sam still being held in one arm, she wasn't a huge help, but she did the best she could and relieved Tommy of the guitar. "This is a nice surprise," she told him.

"I thought it would be nice. This way we can still work on your album without going to the studio. I figured it would be better than having to bring all of Sam's stuff with you."

"That's so true. Thanks." Putting the coffee she had been handed down on the counter, Jude moved over to the crib and laid Sam down. Moving back over to the counter, she joined Tommy in digging into the pastries. As they ate, they talked about random things with ease.

Once their breakfast was done, Tommy cleaned up the plates, rinsing them off in the sink before drying them and putting them back in the cabinet. As he was doing that, he asked, "How would you feel if Sasha came up?"

"I don't mind, but it depends how she does with Sam. Do you want to go get her?"

"She's in the Hummer right now, but I wasn't sure how you'd feel about having her in your place. Kwest and Sadie don't like having her inside their house because they don't want her to mess things up."

"Quincy, it's me. Do you really think I have anything able to be messed up like that? As long as she's good with Sam, then it's fine by me."

Tom smiled at her in a completely endearing kind of way, causing her heart to clench in hope once again. "Great, I'll be right back."

He left the loft in a flash and, not five minutes later, was back with Sasha. Though he had a leash in hand, it wasn't attached to the dog and at the sight of Jude, she ran ahead to greet her new favorite person.

"Hey Sash! How are you, girl?" Sitting on the ground, Jude greeted Sasha and played with her for a moment. Eventually, she stood again, smiling at Tommy as the dog leaned against her leg, nearly knocking her over. "She's in a good mood this morning..."

"What can I say, she was excited to see you." He smiled at her before continuing. "I still can't believe how much she likes you. You are literally the only woman she has taken to, not that I'm surprised."

"Why would you be surprised? Sasha obviously has good taste." Grinning at him, Jude tilted her head to the side, waiting to see if he would respond with a fitting comeback. Not saying anything, Tommy smiled back, eyes sparkling, causing Jude to momentarily forget everything.

Thankfully, a nudge from the dog still at her feet snapped her out of the trance, and Jude let out the breath she had been holding. "Time to work?" she asked.

"Time to work," Tommy affirmed. Tommy walked over to her large, overstuffed couch and sat down, while Jude grabbed her guitar and journal from the music corner she had set up. Sasha looked unsure of who to follow, but after a brief hesitation, trotted behind Jude. Following her to the music corner and then back to the couch, Sasha finally sat when Jude did, laying right next to her on the floor.

Chuckling at his dog's actions, Tommy told her, "Clearly you're her new favorite person."

"Aren't I everybody's?" Jude responded cheekily. When the chuckle turned into a full blown laugh, she couldn't help but smile, absolutely loving the sound.

Amidst the fun and flirty conversation, Jude and Tommy did get some work done. By the end of the day, they had completed a new song and started another, both of which were guaranteed to be hits. Twice they had gone on a walk, driving to a nearby park in a better area of town since the loft wasn't located in the most family-friendly location. They would play, feed, and take care of Sam, making sure that he was content, and Jude couldn't deny how normal it felt to be watching Sam with Tommy. It was a thought that terrified her and delighted her at the same time, partly because she was positive that it couldn't be healthy to be thinking about raising a child with Tommy when they weren't even dating.

Jude's stomach growled loudly, startling both of them from their tired haze.

"Obviously someone's hungry," Tommy smirked.

"Of course I am. You know how often I eat...it's nine o'clock and I haven't had anything since two."

"What sounds good? Chinese, Italian, Thai?"

Tommy knew her well, knowing that cooking a full meal wouldn't exactly be in the plans for their evening. Though she had learned a few things about cooking in the year-and-a-half Tommy had been gone, Jude still wasn't an expert in the kitchen. Besides that, she didn't have much food at home since she had been so busy at the studio lately. "Let's do Italian, that place a few blocks from here will deliver until ten."

Standing, Tommy grabbed his phone from the coffee table and scrolled through his contacts. "Mario's, right?"

"Yeah, that's it. If you tell them it's for me, they'll know my regular order."

"Somehow, that doesn't surprise me." He spoke briefly to the person on the other end of the phone, but soon turned back to Jude. "You get linguine carbonara with scallops for take-out? Is it good?"

"The best. Normally I won't do fish for take-out, but they have the best. They don't freeze their fish and get it fresh every day."

"I might have to try it some time."

"Or you can just have some of mine. Their lasagna is rad so we can just share."

"How did you know that's what I'm getting?"

"It isn't that surprising. You know my favorite thing to order, I know yours."

"I guess that's true..." Tommy seemed to be contemplating her words when the restaurant obviously took him off hold. He finished ordering their food and soon hung up, informing Jude it would be there in no more than thirty minutes.

After dinner was finished, Tommy took Sasha out one last time before suggesting they watch a movie. Jude readily agreed, always up for spending more time with him. Pulling out _The Italian Job_, Tommy held it up. "I thought it would be fitting considering out choice of food."

"Yeah, that's great." It was a good movie choice for the evening because, while entertaining, it was something they had seen many times. Even though it was not even eleven, Jude was tired and wouldn't be surprised if she fell asleep part way through. Pulling out some blankets and grabbing the pillows off the couch, Jude made sure the baby monitor was close at hand before getting comfortable on the ground. Sam had been put down a few hours ago, and Jude was hopeful that she would have at least a few hours before he woke up.

Soon, Tommy joined her after turning off most of the lights, and the pair quickly fell into a comfortable silence, enjoying the movie. However, not thirty minutes in, Jude and Tommy were both asleep, tired after their long day.

The next two days were similar. Tommy was at Jude's loft so much that anyone else would think he lived there. All of their work was done outside of the studio, claiming Sam was the reason. Jude didn't care what the explanation was though, she loved getting time alone with Tom and Sam, not to forget Sasha. In only three days, they had completed two songs and nearly completed three more. It was a whirlwind of writing, but Jude didn't once think that it was too much.

Only once in the entire three days was there an awkward moment, something she found incredibly surprising. There were always the arguments that came with writing songs, but aside from that, it was only when Tommy asked about Chuck that Jude hadn't been sure how to respond. Despite her uncertainty, she just brushed off the topic and refocused their attention on Sam, something easy to do.

She wasn't quite ready to explain everything that happened with Chuck, not wanting to lay everything out for Tommy. She wanted to take things one day at a time, let them develop naturally. Jude didn't want her relationship with Tommy to develop only because things with Chuck had not.

But, regardless of that single awkward occurrence, the weekend had been perfect. Jude was trying to take things slow, and, on the outside, she was doing a good job. But, it was on the inside that there was a serious struggle. Even though they were only doing normal and routine things, menial tasks, it had been perfect. With every smile sent her direction, every innocent touch, Jude's heart would speed up. Just lounging at the loft was perfect in it's simplicity. Never before had Jude felt more at home than with Tommy and Sam.

Except now, both were gone and Jude was, once again, alone. Sitting in her living room, she couldn't help but think it felt empty. She had never minded being by herself before; in fact, some of her best songs were written in the solitary confinement of her room, where inspiration could run free. But having Tommy and Sam had been a new kind of inspiration.

Looking at the clock on her nightstand, Jude wasn't surprised to see that it was nearly midnight. Kwest and Sadie had picked up Sam just after six, and Tommy and Sasha had left around eight after helping her clean up. Once they had gone, Jude picked up around her place a little more before going into her studio. She had listened to some beats Spied wanted her opinion on and then took a look at the new song she was helping Waking Blind with. However, that had only taken an hour or so, and Jude was distracted by her own thoughts. She had tried to write as a way to process her emotions, but it had been to no avail. Eventually she had gone to bed, but sleep could not find her. Regardless of her early studio time, Jude's mind would not rest.

Reluctantly, she got up and threw on a sweatshirt laying on her nearby chair. Heading downstairs, she quickly warmed some water with her electric teapot. Once the water was done and the tea steeping, Jude pulled out her journal, and tried, for the second time, to write. For some reason, she was successful, her words flowing through her fingers as if possessed.

It was rare to craft such a complete song in one sitting, something Jude had only experienced a few times in her career. Nonetheless, an exhausted smile caressed her face only two hours later and she was perfectly satisfied. It expressed her confusion and her hope, her desire for more. As pure exhaustion took over her body, Jude set her journal down next to her and closed her eyes, only intending to do so for a moment. But, mission accomplished and song completed, Jude was able to rest, quickly succumbing to sleep.


	16. Chapter 16

So...I am a terrible person for taking SOOOO long to get this out! The past couple of months have been a bit crazy between school and life, but that is no excuse! Know that the story is almost done and I will not let it hang any more! Here is chapter 16, and chapter 17 will be up soon.  
>Your notes and reviews are truly an encouragement and I am so thankful for them! They honestly inspire me to get things done more quickly! Enjoy, and let me know what you think! :)<p>

Chapter 16

The slow heat burned as it glided down his throat and settled in his gut. A cool breeze rolled over him, counteracting the warming effects of the alcohol. The weekend had been amazing, but incredibly long and trying.

When Jude had come back from the tour over a week before, he couldn't wait to see her. They hadn't talked since she left, and he had missed her like crazy. When she hadn't called him after a week of being gone, he had tried calling Kwest, hoping to gain some insight as to what was going on. His best friend had explained that Jude was trying to gain some distance and perspective. From her last night in town he knew that she was still hurting, and Kwest's words made sense.

Knowing what Jude was trying to do, he held back. There was a part of him that wanted to go after her and make her listen, but he understood that an approach like that would not go over well. Instead, he waited. In the midst of his loneliness, Tommy bought a dog, Sasha, and the rest of his free time was spent writing. Not every song was a masterpiece, but together, they created the story of his love for Jude.

But now, Jude had been back for about a week and things were moving along nicely. Wanting to prove that he cared more about her than he did about getting his way and being with her, Tommy had been the picture of a perfect friend. He had wanted nothing more than to kiss her when she stepped off the bus, hence fleeing to storage room to load all of the extra amps and materials. Once everything had been unloaded and the storage room was closed up, Tom had been able to get ahold of himself and searched out his girl. Realizing that she was still busy with the last minute details coming back from a tour, Tommy had gone to his office to work through some inventory papers.

When she had appeared at his door, he couldn't deny the joy that surfaced. From there, he had taken her home and it was like old times. Before dropping her off, they had agreed that he would pick her up the following day and take her into the studio. It had been hellish that night, he could barely sleep from the excitement he felt at seeing her. But, the next day he had brought Sasha along, knowing that the new addition to his life was a decent judge of character. More than that though, he needed to know if he would have to get rid of the dog sooner rather than later...nothing would get in the way of building a future with his girl. The next few days brought more of the same—normal life in and out of the studio. In the mornings, he would pick her up to grab some coffee before heading into the studio, and after work they would grab food before going to their separate homes. After a few days, Jude had agreed to watch her nephew since her sister and his best friend wanted to get away for a few days.

Knowing that an extra set of hands was always nice when taking care of a baby, even one as cute as Sam, Tommy had decided to help out. So, the morning Kwest and Sadie had left, he showed up at Jude's door with coffee and pastries, ready to help in whatever way possible. For three days they had basically lived together, interacting like a family. Since leaving almost two years previously, Tommy knew that he wanted Jude. And, since returning, he knew that Jude was it for him. She was the only one he wanted.

But, living with her for a weekend had affected him in ways he didn't expect. They weren't even dating at this point, and he already felt completely connected with her; though they did nothing overtly physical, being together and by her side nonstop like that seemed completely normal. There had to have been at least fifty times that he had wanted to wrap his arms around her or kiss her or start ripping her clothes off; as perfect as the weekend had been, it had been pure torture at the same time.

Now, sitting in his apartment with only the half-empty bottle of whiskey as company, Tom knew that this night would be his only reprieve. Tomorrow, he would once again be tormented by her—being so close, and not able to touch her like he wanted.

He knew that was what it would take, though. Though Jude was amicable towards him and they seemed to enjoy a renewed sense of friendship, Tom knew that she was still cautious. Not to mention that she still had a friendship with Chuck, and, if he broke them apart, she would be furious. That was the reason he had to be strong. He figured that, by being a picture perfect friend, he could prove to Jude that she was important to him. He wouldn't cross any lines and he wouldn't pressure her, hoping that time would wear her down.

With a sign, he placed the now empty glass on the coffee table. The kitchen was only ten feet away, but it seemed out of the way and too far for his weary body. Instead, he went straight to his room, nearly falling onto his bed as exhaustion took over. Closing his eyes, visions of the weekend scrolled through his mind...pictures of Jude holding Sam, the three of them at the park, late-night writing sessions, and the beauty that was being with his girl.

Content to be wrapped in the arms of his perfect dreams, Tommy eventually succumbed to the pull of sleep. The following morning, he made sure to grab extra coffee on the way to the studio, needing the assurance that he would be alert and awake. If he was tired, he was much more likely to slip up and act on one of those impulses to kiss her...or pull her into a closet for a quickie.

Late in the afternoon, Waking Blind was taking a break from recording and Tommy was going for what had to be his tenth cup of coffee that day. Jude had finished some lyrics for them and Darius wanted the track recorded as soon as possible. Though it was almost complete, it had been a long day, and he was already exhausted. As usual, having Jude in the studio was great, but since their weekend together, he was having a harder time sticking to a "friends only" relationship. And, not that he cared too much, there was still Chuck to consider. Tommy knew that they weren't dating, but the way the pair interacted did give him cause for minor concern.

Nonetheless, he trudged on. Retrieving his coffee cup from the microwave, Tommy headed back into the studio. After the band had finished their last take, he and Jude has listened to the track once more and decided the drums needed to be re-recorded. Walking into the studio, he saw Jude talking with Nate, explaining that he needed to be a bit more precise in his beats to make the track a bit more clean.

Sitting at the board, he savored the moment of quiet before they took what would hopefully be the last take. Jude walked in and took her place next to him. As they cued Nate to begin, Tom was distracted by a blur of red running through G Major's lobby. Turning his head, he was surprised to see some woman in a bright red dress hugging Chuck.

Quickly looking back to Jude, he realized that she hadn't seen the girl. Wanting to distract her from any potential emotional pain at seeing Chuck and this other woman embracing, Tommy vowed to keep her attention solely on the recording until the hussy was gone.

Realizing that the track had just finished, Tommy looked up and told Nate to do it one more time, "Just to make sure we got a clean take."

Looking at him with raised eyebrows, Jude muttered, "Perfectionist," under her breath. Turning back to face the booth, she motioned to Nate that the music would start and watched as he waited for his cue. As Tommy watched her watching Nate, he noticed that she seemed to be entranced by the motion of his hands, but he wondered it there was more to it.

"Great job, Nate. I think that's a wrap on the song, so you guys can all get out of here if you want."

"Thanks, Jude, Tom. Can't wait to hear the finished product," Nate told them with a smile. "I think we're gonna grab some beers at Dakota Tavern if you guys want to join. Celeste hasn't been there and Chuck thought she would like it."

Smiling, Jude tilted her head to the side. "She's never been to Dakota? I didn't know such a person existed…huh?" Shaking her head, Jude moved on. "I don't think I'll join you guys tonight, but thanks for the invite."

Pausing before he left the studio, Nate turned to face Tommy. "What do you think, Quincy? Wanna join?"

"Not tonight, but maybe some other time. Have a good evening."

"You too, guys." With that, Nate walked out the door and joined the rest of his band and the woman in the red dress, who Tommy assumed was Celeste. Turning to face Jude, he figured now would be the time to ask about the other woman, but was surprised to see her standing up, arms above her head and stretching her back. At the hint of bare skin between her shirt and jeans, his eyes widened and grew dark with attraction.

Oblivious to the effect her actions had on her coworker, Jude opened her mouth to speak, eyes still closed. "I'm gonna say hi to Celeste for a sec, but I'll be right back to go through the song." Arms returning to her side, Jude exited the studio, but stopped the door from sliding closed. "You wanna meet her, Quince?"

Not sure how to respond, Tommy was thankful when his phone began to ring. Glancing at the number on the screen, he told her, "I guess not. Let me get this and we'll meet back here in five?"

Jude nodded before letting the door close and moving toward the group still in the center of the lobby. Tommy watched as she hugged the other woman and began to talk with her animatedly, hands flailing and a smile on her lips. He was more curious than ever, trying to figure out who this new woman was and why Jude had no problem with her obvious closeness to Chuck.

Bringing himself back to the conversation at hand, Tommy responded with simple "yes" and "no" answers. The past few days had been filled with rain, and he realized that the seals on many of the windows in his apartment were broken, and water was damaging the walls. Because of that, his landlord was verifying that he found a place to stay while the problem was fixed. In all honesty, Tommy hadn't thought about it, but was sure he could hole up in a local hotel for the week or so it would take to fix things.  
>After hanging up the phone, Tom sat back in his chair, waiting for his girl to rejoin him. Watching what was happening in the lobby, he saw Jude give the other woman a hug. As she returned to their studio, he turned to face her, but was struck by the expression on her face. Her eyes followed Chuck, the band, and the new girl as they left, but it was the sadness reflected that caused his heart to clench.<p>

"Jude?" Putting a hand on her knee, he questioned her, wanting to know what changed her mood.

She glanced in his direction quickly, and shook her head as if to shake away the feelings. "I'm fine, but thanks for askin'." Scooting closer to the board, she focused her attention and asked, "Should we finish up that song?"

Though she had moved slightly, the action did not remove his hand from her knee. Knowing that she wasn't fine, he wanted to be closer to her. Scooting closer to the board and closer to her, Tom moved his hand from her knee and put it around her shoulders. "I guess we'll get to work, slave driver…"

At his words, she faced him and stuck out her tongue. They both knew he was often more regimented in his work ethic, though no one could deny she got the job done, and done well at that.

"Kidding, kidding." He raised his hands in mock surrender before asking, "Wanna grab some dinner after work? Just something low key?"

A soft smile crept onto her face as she agreed, "Yeah, that sounds good."

"Good, I don't have any food in my house after staying with you for a few days."

"Figures," she told him, rolling her eyes and punching his arm.

Playful banter completed for the moment, Tommy turned to the computer and Jude fiddled with some of the knobs on the board. As they worked, there were not many words spoken, but it was completely comfortable. It only took another hour to finish the track, and thirty minutes later, the pair were on their way to Jude's, ready to eat and relax.

Over the next few weeks, their routine was more of the same. While Jude and Waking Blind were on tour, Darius had signed a new artist to the label, an up-and-coming R & B/rapper well-known to the Toronto area, Micah Black. Tommy had agreed to produce his debut album, so long as Darius knew that Jude's album was a priority as well. Of course, their boss had no problem with that, knowing that Jude's newest album was bound to be a huge success.

A week after they had started working, Jude had finagled her way as a co-producer on Micah's album. Not that Tommy was complaining, the more time he got to spend with his girl, the better. But, it became slightly more difficult to work on his own album. So, in the few spare minutes he had when not working with Jude and Micah, Tommy wrote like a maniac, wanting everything to be perfect.

He still hadn't told her about it, wanting to surprise her more than ever. He was thinking that her birthday would be the perfect opportunity, but it was still about six months away, and Tommy didn't know if he could keep the secret that long.

Nonetheless, work continued. In the month since Tommy had helped Jude watch Sam, huge progress was made on Micah's album and it was already half done. Jude's album was also coming along, but at a slower pace due to her determination to be involved in every part of the process. It was obvious to everyone that Jude loved working on her music again, but Tommy still noticed a hint of sadness in her eyes every now and then.

Usually, she had the same kind of joy as when she first started out nearly three years prior; but once in a while, her eyes seemed to darken, and a haze of emotional pain seemed to take over. Of course, that glimpse of honesty only lasted a few seconds, but Tommy knew it was there. He wasn't sure what caused it, but he wanted nothing more than to find out and fix it for her.

But, in typical Jude fashion, regardless of the personal pain or emotional turmoil she seemed to be suffering, work was a priority. Her drive to succeed and create musical masterpieces was on fire, and Tommy knew that this album would be her best yet.

Lost in thoughts of the music they had been laying down recently, Tommy was startled when someone tapped his shoulder. Nearly jumping out of his seat, he turned to find a grinning Jude looking back at him. Her eyes sparkled with mischief, and Tom knew that his slight irritation was as good as gone. How could someone stay mad at her when she looked like that?

Allowing his lips to form a smirk, Tommy sat still in his chair for a moment before jumping up and tackling her to the couch behind them. His fingers finding her sides, he began tickling her until her screeches and laughter filled the room.

"Stop! Please stop! I'll do whatever you want, just stop!"

Ceasing all movement and loosening his hold on her, Tommy studied her before asking, "Whatever I want?"

Using the lessened grip to her advantage, Jude extricated herself from his grasp and jumped to the other side of the sound booth, just out of his reach. "Well, not whatever you want…"

An impish grin still highlighted her features, and Tommy could only smile. "One day, Harrison. One day," he hinted under his breath, unable to control his words.

Her eyebrows raised at his statement, making him aware that he spoke the words louder than intended. Before she could ask him about it, Tommy spoke up. "Have anything new for me today?" And easy as that, they were back to work. Lost in conversations and discussions of melodies, harmonies, beats, and lyrics, the music seemed to organize and formulate itself.

By the end of the evening, another song was finished, and Jude's album was one step closer to completion. Tommy was excited to see their progress, but he knew that the end of her album meant less time in the studio with her. And, being completely honest with himself, that was one of his favorite places. Well, for now that was one of his favorite places to be with her. Being with her in his bed would undoubtedly be a favorite as well, but for now, that wasn't an option.

Pushing those thoughts aside, Tommy refocused his attention on the soundboard in front of him and the voice of his angel coming through the speakers.

Sitting at the counter in her loft, Jude mulled over the events of the past few weeks. Her friendship with Chuck was back on track and, thankfully, there wasn't any residual awkwardness between them. It would have been easy for their friendship to suffer and be strange, especially now that he was officially dating Celeste, but, things between them were fine. In fact, Jude really like Celeste, and even went out with her a few times for dinner and such.

Things with Tommy were going well, and Jude was grateful for the easy friendship that had become routine. Their partnership on her album was perfect, their natural chemistry producing some of the best work either of them had ever created. In addition, Jude was now helping out on Micah Black's album, and she loved learning the ins and outs of a new genre and style.

All in all, things were going well for Jude and she knew that she should be thrilled with the direction her life and her music were taking. But, she couldn't deny that she felt left out...like she was missing something. The shrill ring of her phone startled her out of her thoughts, but she quickly silenced the offensive device. Knowing that the ring signified that Sadie was downstairs, Jude grabbed her purse and headed out her door. She had agreed to go to some spa with Sadie for some "sisterly bonding," but that was before her "funk" hit full force.

Though she had never really been one to sulk, Jude wanted nothing more than to grab some ice cream and watch trashy TV. Long term it wouldn't do much good, but in this moment, it seemed like the perfect remedy for the hurting heart she had been wearing for a while. She wondered how long it would take before her stubborn heart would move on, but she was beginning to lose hope. Maybe that little empty spot in her heart would never go away.

The bright glare assaulted her as she opened the door of her building. Enough to break her away from the melancholy thoughts that seemed to be a regular occurrence, Jude put a smile on her face and waved to her sister. She didn't want Sadie to start badgering her with questions, and the best way to avoid that was to pretend that all was well and that life was grand.

"Hey Sades," she greeted her sister as she opened the passenger side door. Buckling her seatbelt, Jude didn't allow Sadie to start questioning her. "So, what is this spa we're going to?" Before pulling onto the street, Sadie gave Jude a questioning look. But, much to Jude's relief, her sister faced the road and began telling her about Elmwood Spa. After their morning treatments they would have lunch on the terrace, followed by massages, manicures, and pedicures.

Thankfully, once Sadie started she didn't stop. The entire drive to the spa was filled with tidbits of information about what they were having done and why Elmwood was so incredible. After arriving, they were whisked off to separate rooms and Jude was thrilled with the quiet and relaxing atmosphere. While sitting alone in her room waiting for the detoxification process to conclude, she thought about Tommy. Really, it wasn't surprising that her thoughts returned to him…they were always on him.

Sometime between arriving at the spa earlier that day and rinsing off before meeting Sadie on the terrace for their lunch, Jude decided that she needed to talk to someone. If she kept her inner struggle to herself, she would undoubtedly go crazy. She loved Tommy and wanted to be with him, there was no denying it.

"How do you feel?" Sadie asked as Jude sat down.

Though her question was meant to be about the spa experience thus far, Jude was in such an emotional state that tears began leaking form her eyes.

Filled with concern, her sister quickly stood and wrapped her arms around Jude. Quickly, they sunk to the bench and Jude rested in the hold of Sadie. After a few minutes, she seemed to be able to stop the tears and looked at her sister with wide, red eyes. "Thanks," she whispered.

"Jude, of course…" Stroking the younger sister's hair, Sadie eventually asked, "What's going on?"

"I'm a mess," Jude replied. Looking down at her hands clasped on her lap, Jude didn't say anything else. As much as she wanted to share the emotional turmoil she had been working through recently, she didn't know where to begin. Eventually, she was able to gain some words and began. "I did it again, Sades."

A look of confusion crossed her sister's face for the briefest of seconds before realization dawned on her. "Tommy?"

Just nodding her head in response, Jude closed her eyes. Another moment passed when no one spoke, Sadie simply holding Jude close. As Jude relaxed, she began to sit more upright and faced her sister once again. "I did it again, Sades. I let myself fall for him."

"Jude, I don't mean to sound harsh, but did you ever not care about him? Are you so surprised by it all?"

A self-deprecating laugh escaped her lips as Jude rolled her eyes. "Honestly, no. I'm not at all surprised, and that's what kills me. He left for a year-and-a-half without a single word to me. Not once did he contact me and not once did he let me know that he was okay...or that he even cared!" Not wanting to give away too many details, Jude left out any mention of her and Tommy's date the night before he left. "But, regardless of his lack of consideration for what I felt, he came back and I basically jumped into his arms. I mean, I barely lasted three months, and even then I was torturing myself. Sure, I put on a good front, but every time he would say something nice or do something sweet for me, I would literally melt inside. Once you went to the hospital that first time I was done for. I think I finally realized that I couldn't keep holding him at an arm's length. Then there was the skank incident, but the only reason I was so upset was because I wanted to be with him and had finally let myself consider that as an option. After hearing his explanation, I got over it pretty quickly. Once Sam was born, it was like Tommy was all I could think about. I used to dream about being married to him...having a family with him. Even on tour when I was supposed to be getting him out of my system I thought about him constantly. After tour was over, I resigned myself to the fact that I would always care for Tom Quincy. He was helping out with Sam that weekend you guys went away, and it was like a picture of what life would be like if we were together...completely perfect. Seriously, I have never in my life felt more content and at ease than I did those few days with Tom and Sam around."

Interrupting the monologue, Sadie asked, "So, what's the problem? I mean, you and Tom seem to be getting along well now and that weird thing you had with Chuck is over...what's the problem?"

"I don't know. He's been the perfect friend the past few weeks, not once crossing a line. He's been thoughtful and considerate, completely helpful on my album, sweet and encouraging when we're working with Micah..." Jude paused, trying to find the words to explain her frustration, but before she could continue, Sadie spoke up.

"Maybe I'm having a blonde moment, but I still don't see the problem. He's being great, so why did you just have a breakdown?"

"I've realized that I love him."

"So..."

"Sadie, you don't get it," Jude said, interrupting her sister, her tone almost angry. "He consumes me. Literally every moment of every day I think about him...I'm obsessed. I wonder what he's up to or what he would think about a melody going through my head. I want to tell him the funny things I think of and just be around him." After gulping a sip of the fruit-enhanced water sitting by her plate, Jude closed her eyes. "The problem is that Tom Quincy doesn't love me back. I have completely set myself up for massive heartbreak and there isn't anything I can do about it."

Sadie was quiet for a moment before smacking her sister on the arm. "What the hell are you on?"

Startled by the sudden pain in her arm, Jude's eyes flew open and stared at her sister, lips parted. But, quick to continue, Sadie spoke up once again. "Jude, you have seriously lost it if you don't think Tommy loves you. He has only had eyes for you since meeting you over three years ago!"

"Then why is he being so friendly? In the studio things are awesome, it's just like old times. But, once we leave G Major, there is this weird, completely nonsexual vibe." Jude's frustration was clearly evident, her voice beginning to crack with emotion.

Amidst the sadness and confusion radiating off of Jude, Sadie laughed. Really, it was only about three minutes, but they were the longest three minutes Jude had ever experienced. Eventually, her sister seemed to get ahold of herself, and it was Jude's turn to hit her sister's arm.

"What the hell, Sadie? I'm on the verge of a mental breakdown, and you laugh?"

"Sis, did you ever think that there might be another reason Tommy is being so friendly with you?"

"What other reason is there? Either he likes me and wants me or he doesn't. This platonic friend vibe he's sending out makes it pretty clear what he feels like."

Rolling her eyes, Sadie told her, "It's a damn good thing you're a musician." Facing Jude fully, Sadie grabbed both her hands and spoke slowly, as if speaking to a child. "Jude, clearly you're missing all of the other cues that make me know that Tom Quincy is as in love with you as you are with him."

Confusion took over Jude's expression, her brow bunching and eyes questioning.

But, without having to ask for clarification, Sadie continued. "Do you not see the looks Tom sends your way whenever you're within thirty feet of him? Do you not see the way he reaches out to touch your arm or hold your hand or put his arm around you before jerking it back like he was lit on fire? Jude, I get that you've been on emotional roller coaster the past few weeks, the past few months, even. But, at some point, you have to put yourself out there."

"But what if he doesn't really care. You know how much of a flirt he is... How do you know that he's serious about me?"

"Jude, I'm surprised you're even asking that." Sadie was clearly getting frustrated, but was being patient with her sister.

"I'm just scared..."

"Honey..."

Looking her sister in the eye, Jude interrupted. "Sades, when Tommy left last year, I was devastated. But worse than that, I broke down. I lost so much of who I was, and it wasn't until he came back that I started to find myself again. I can't go through that a second time because I don't think I'll make it. What if we try and everything falls apart?"

"But what if it becomes your happily ever after?" Once again, Sadie placed her hands on Jude's knees. "You can't live your life in fear, Jude; and you can't live your life based on 'what ifs'. Maybe its time to be honest with Tommy and tell him how you feel. Have you ever thought that he might be scared too?"

"Why would he be scared? I've basically been in love with him since I was fifteen."

"Sure, but does he know that? Besides, does he know that you and Chuck are only friends at this point?"

Despite the fact that Sadie was still speaking, Jude opened her mouth to respond. However, at her sister's question, Jude shut her mouth and seemed to contemplate. A few moments of silence passed before Jude tilted her head. "I would assume he knows Chuck and I are only friends... I mean, I haven't said anything outright, but he sees Celeste around G all the time."

Eyes wide, Sadie threw her arms in the air. "Why didn't you say anything?"

Shrugging her shoulders, Jude responded, "He didn't ask?" At her sister's exasperated expression, Jude expanded on her earlier comment. "When I came back from tour, I didn't exactly want to jump in his arms and tell him I loved him. I knew that, if things were going to happen with Tommy, I wanted them to be a little more natural. I didn't want what was going on with Chuck to be the focus of things between Tommy and I."

"While I kind of understand where you were coming from, it's been over a month, Jude! Don't you think it's a possibility that Tommy is holding back because he doesn't know what the deal is with you and Chuck?"

"I guess..." Staring at the view of the city visible from their perch on terrace, Jude was lost in thought. After at least five minutes of silence, she looked back to her sister. "I should probably talk to Tommy, huh?"

Nodding her head in agreement, Sadie told her, "Yeah, you should." Turning back towards the food that had appeared while Jude was considering her earlier words, Sadie changed the topic. "Now, this food looks pretty incredible, let's dig in."

"Yeah it does." Minutes into their feast, Jude looked up again. "Thanks, Sadie. I really appreciate you...listening and being honest with me."

"Anytime, Jude. Anytime."

From there, the rest of the afternoon proceeding wonderfully. The sisters enjoyed their two-hour massage following the lunch feast, refraining from Tommy-related topics for Jude's sake. Late that afternoon after "sister bonding" had been successfully completed, Jude returned to her loft and picked up her guitar. After her conversation with Sadie, Jude was feeling oddly inspired, and felt a need to get her feelings out. Sitting on her bed, she began to write. The words seemed to pen themselves in her journal, and slowly, a song was born.

Hours later, song complete, Jude fell into bed. It didn't matter that it was only nine o'clock, she was exhausted. Knowing that the following day would be spent working in the studio on her own album, Jude felt the need to get to sleep. However, her sleep was restless as thoughts of how her new song would be received filled her mind. After her conversation with Sadie, she considered the possibility that it would be time to move forward with Tommy.

Of course, that would start with her telling Tommy, point blank, that she and Chuck were nothing more than friends. The next step would be opening herself up and showing a more honest and vulnerable side to Tommy. He was the man she loved, and if she was going to be honest with anyone, it should be he him. With that plan set in her mind, Jude was finally able to get some rest.

The following morning, Jude was up early and at the studio nearly thirty minutes before her scheduled time. She was sipping her own latte as Tommy walked in, smiling at his reaction to the black coffee she had set in front of his usual chair. If every morning in the studio was like this, life would be just about perfect, she thought.

They sat together in silence for a few more minutes, enjoying each other's company even in the silence. However, all good things had to end eventually; her and Tommy's moment came to an abrupt end with the slamming of the studio door. Jumping out of her seat, Jude glared at Spied who was currently hiding in the corner while attempting to peak around it and see the other side.  
>"Ugh," Jude groaned. "What the hell are you doing, Spied?"<p>

"Shhh!" he commanded. "I lost one of Kyle's favorite sticks, and then broke the other one."

"How do you break a drumstick?" Tommy asked, brow furrowed in confusion.

Jude had been wondering the same thing, and thankfully, Spied answered.

"I dropped that bracelet I like down the disposal...you know, the leather one we got at that street fair last year?"

Jude nodded her understanding. But as she thought a bit more about his statement, the confusion persisted. "What does that have to do with the drumstick?"

Rolling his eyes, Spied glanced at Jude before looking back out the studio door. "I was trying to get the bracelet out but couldn't reach it. I figured the drumstick would help, and it was working until..." He paused, looking at the ground before continuing. "Well, I got sidetracked when Wally brought over ribs from our favorite bar-b-que place. After we ate, we decided to throw the football, and Wally threw this awesome spiral that ended up hitting the disposal and..." Spied's explanation trailed off as he made a move toward the door.

It seemed as though Kyle was otherwise distracted, giving Spied the time he needed to escape. Again the door slammed shut, but with their moment interrupted, Jude sighed in frustration. Looking back to Tommy, she stood. "I guess we should get started?"  
>Meeting her eyes and tilting his head, Tommy asked, "You have something new?"<p>

Not wanting to explain the song at that moment, Jude took the easy way out. "Don't I always?"

Though he was shaking his head in mock irritation, she could see the sparkle in his eye. As she fiddled in the studio, he set up the board. At first, Jude wasn't sure she would play the song she wrote the previous night. But, as she thought back to the conversation with her sister, she knew that she had to play Distance. Her plan was to begin anew and be honest with Tommy, and that had to start now. Taking a deep breath, Jude began to sing.

_The sun is filling up the room  
>And I can hear you dreaming<br>Do you feel the way I do right now?  
>I wish we would just give up<br>Cause the best part is falling  
>Call it anything but love<em>

_And I will make sure to keep my distance  
>Say "I love you" when you're not listening<br>How long can we keep this up, up, up?_

_And please don't stand so close to me  
>I'm having trouble breathing<br>I'm afraid of what you'll see right now  
>I give you everything I am<br>All my broken heart beats  
>Until I know you understand<em>

_And I will make sure to keep my distance  
>Say "I love you" when you're not listening<br>How long can we keep this up, up, up?_

_And I keep waiting  
>For you to take me<br>You keep waiting  
>To save what we have<em>

_So I make sure to keep my distance  
>Say "I love you" when you're not listening<br>How long can we keep this up, up, up?_

_Make sure to keep my distance  
>Say "I love you" when you're not listening<br>How long til we call this love, love, love?_

Her eyes were closed as she finished singing, though Jude wasn't sure if it was because she was lost in the emotion of the song or because she was afraid to see Tommy's reaction. But, after a few minutes with no sound coming from the booth in front of her, Jude gradually opened one eye, the other quickly following. "So…" She paused, waiting for a response. When Tommy still didn't say anything, she asked, "What did you think?"

Finally, he looked up and met her gaze, eyes wide and clouded over. His expression was unreadable, something Jude found disconcerting. Eventually Tommy opened his mouth, "Jude, that was…"

As he was about to say more, the studio door burst open and Spied rushed in, cowering behind Jude. Turning, she raised her eyebrows in an unspoken question.

"Kyle found out that it was my fault about his drumstick and he's ready to kill me!" Spied whined.

He let out a girlish shriek as Kyle slammed the door against the wall and stomped into the studio where Spied was still huddled behind Jude. "Vincent!" he boomed.

Knowing that things could get out of hand quickly, Jude spoke up before Kyle was able to say more. "Kyle, stop," she told him sternly. Turning so that she could see both boys, her gaze landed on Spied. "Stand up and stop being a baby, Vin." Looking back to Kyle, Jude was surprised to see how angry he was. "Kyle, I know he broke you favorite set…"

"Lucky set, Jude. They were my lucky sticks!"

Now Kyle was the one whining, and Jude couldn't help but crack a smile at the boys' antics. "I know Kyle, but come on…you are like a master drummer…you don't need lucky sticks. Besides, I need both of you to back me up in a few weeks. Darius agreed to get us some local gigs. And, if you don't kill him right now, I guarantee that Spied will buy you those awesome light up LED sticks you saw at the music store."

"Totally, Dude. Whatever you want…just don't kill me," Spied begged.

Glaring at his bandmate for a moment, Kyle eventually rolled his eyes. "Fine, I won't kill you. But you have to get me a new set of the Japanese Oak sticks too."

"Deal!" Spied cried.

"Good. Now that we're back to being buds, can you guys get out of here. We were in the middle of recording."

"You got it, Dude." Spied gave her a pat on the back and followed Kyle out of the studio. As easy as that, the two boys were joking around.

Rather than staying in the studio, Jude headed back into the booth and sat down next to Tommy. "Now that the children are taken care of, what did you think of the song?"

Though the mood from earlier was broken, Tommy's look was still clouded and somewhat reserved. She still couldn't tell what he thought, but waited patiently for him to speak.

"Jude, it was amazing. So honest and real…heartbreaking, but hopeful at the same time…" His words trailed off, but his eyes became more clear.

Jude could see the hint excitement make his eyes sparkle, and she couldn't look away. Even if he wasn't allowing her to see the full spectrum of his emotions and thoughts, she could tell that he truly liked the song. In this moment, that was all that mattered, and she smiled in response. "Good. I was feeling really inspired last night…"

"Yeah? Did you and Sadie have a good time yesterday?"

Smiling, Jude nodded her head. "Surprisingly, yeah, we did."

"Good, I know she can be very…Sadie-like sometimes."

Chuckling, Jude agreed. "That she can be. How was your day?"

The pair continued to talk, enjoying the moment of quiet they were able to share. Before either had realized it, nearly an hour had passed and their conversation was broken off when Spied peeked his head in the door. "Oh, I didn't know you guys were still working."

Looking at his watch, Tommy's eyes widened at the realization of just how long they had been sitting there. "No problem, come on in."

Standing and picking up her things, Jude slowly made her way to the door. She was thoroughly enjoying her time with Tommy and didn't want it to end just because SME was coming in. But, as she turned to ask him if he wanted to head down to their favorite record store, Spied spoke up again.

"Jude, Chuck is in the lobby and wanted to see you before you left for the day." She was about to ask why Chuck wanted to see her, but anticipating her question, Spied told her, "No, I don't know why."

"Okay…" Seeing that Tommy made no move to leave, Jude set her things down in the corner. "I'll be right back."

Only a few minutes later, Jude reappeared in the studio to grab her things. Tommy looked up at her from his place still in the chair and raised his eyebrows in question.

"It wasn't anything. Celeste and I set up dinner tonight and she was going to confirm what time. But her phone broke and she was late for work so Chuck was just telling me that she would be over at seven." Rushing the sentence, Jude took a deep breath before asking Tommy, "Wanna hit the record store with me? I have a while since it's only three…"

She left the question hanging, nervous for his response. She knew that they worked well as friends, but this was really the first time that she was asking him out. Sure, it may not be a traditional "date" per say, but it was still nerve-racking.

Abruptly standing up, Tommy grabbed his jacket from the back of the chair. "That sounds perfect. Stick your guitar in my office and we'll walk."

The smile he gave her made her heart melt and her body seem to float. "Perfect," she whispered as he walked away.

Within about five minutes, the pair was off, laughter ringing in the air. At one point, Tommy grasped her hand as they were crossing the street, and hadn't let go until they reached the record store. Already giddy about spending more time with him, Jude had nearly vowed to never wash that hand again.

Roaming through the rows of old records, she found herself watching Tommy more than flipping through the music. She loved how his face lit upon finding something unique, or how his nose scrunched up when he discovered a strange album cover or funny band name. Thankfully, he only caught her staring a couple of times, and each instance she was able to play it off as though she was waiting to show him an amazing find of her own.

An hour passed before they left the store, each with new records in hand. Tommy again grabbed Jude's hand at what seemed to be the first opportunity and held it until they were nearly at G Major. A couple of blocks before they arrived at the back alley entrance to the studio, he stopped and sat at a bench in front of one of the stores.

Confused, Jude asked, "What is it, Tommy?"

"I just thought we could relax for a few more minutes." Patting the spot next to him, he told her, "Join me."

Sitting beside him, Jude wasn't sure how close she should allow herself to get. The decision was taken out of her hands as a cool breeze swept past them, the brisk air chilling her skin and causing her to shiver. Surprised by the weight of Tommy's arm around her shoulders, Jude quickly became accustomed to it and settled comfortably into his side.

Minutes passed with no words being spoken, and Jude was lost in a maze of her own thoughts. The afternoon with Tommy had been delightful. She hadn't stopped smiling since sitting down in the studio with him, and she couldn't help but be cherish this moment. Yes, she realized that she was sounding like a sap, but it was true. And, while she loved spending time with him as a friend, she couldn't help but want more. With everyone around her pairing off, the feelings of loneliness were coming back full force. Jude was so lost in her thoughts that she didn't realize Tommy was speaking until he nudged her side. "Huh?"

"What are you doing with Celeste tonight?"

"She's bringing over sushi and we're going to go over some of her sketches. Did you know she's an aspiring designer?"

"No, really? Why is she working at the diner?"

"She's saving up to go to design school. The problem is that design school is so expensive that she can't seem to save enough and still pay all of her bills."

"That's rough," Tommy commented.

"Yeah, but she started teaching herself to sew over a year ago and has gotten really good. She may not even do the whole design school thing if she can get some recognition."

Nodding his head in understanding, Tommy's only response was, "That's cool." Again silence became their third wheel as each were lost in their thoughts. For once, Jude's thoughts were on what style Celeste would try to put her into.

Abruptly, Tommy sat up and faced Jude. He wouldn't meet her eyes because his were focused on the dirty sidewalk, and his hand made it's way to his neck, a sure sign that Tom Quincy was nervous. Before Jude could further contemplate what had put him in such a state, he began to speak. "So, what's the deal with Celeste? I mean, she's been around the last few weeks, but I still don't know how she got in with everyone." He paused but, as Jude was about to answer, another question came to his mind and he asked, "And what's with her and Chuck? Why are they so close all of a sudden?" Again, Jude's mouth was open to answer, but he interrupted with another question. "And why aren't you upset about all the time they spend together? I don't get why you're buddy-buddy with her."

Jude let a full minute pass before answering, wanting to make sure all of his questions were out. Deciding that now was the time to put into practice her decision to be more honest, she began to explain. "Well, Chuck and I met Celeste a few weeks ago at the diner. She was our waitress, but seemed to only pay attention to Chuck. So, after I left, he began talking to her and they kind of hit it off. They started hanging out more, and then she became friends with Riley since she was spending so much time with the band. I got to spend some time with her a couple of weeks ago and we hit it off too. She's fun."

Jude shrugged her shoulders and paused. "Chuck and Celeste are dating. Officially, I think it's been about two weeks, but they kind of hit it off from the beginning." She knew that her explanation didn't really suffice it to explain the whole Chuck "situation," but she didn't exactly want to get into it on the side of a street with people and cars all around them.

"But what about you? How are you doing with them?"

"Honestly, I'm good with it. Celeste is fun and it's obvious how happy she makes Chuck."

"But Jude, what about you and Chuck…you guys were so close…" He left the question hanging, seemingly uncertain of how to gain more information.

Jude couldn't help but smile at his words. He was so thoughtful and concerned for her. He made her feel special and cared for, something that had been severely missing in her life. Putting her hand on his knee, she let the love she felt for him shine through her eyes. Even if she couldn't tell him quite yet, at least she could let it show. "Tommy, I'm really okay with it. Chuck and I are friends, but nothing else. We realized on tour that we just…" Not quite sure how to put it, Jude bit her lip while briefly lost in her thoughts. "We wanted different things." Jude decided to leave it at that for the time being.

"What could be so different that you aren't together?"

Sighing, Jude moved her hand so that it was grasping his. His eyes widened at her action, but gave her a slight squeeze in response. As she was about to suggest that they talk about this later, his phone rang, startling them both out of the closeness they had been entranced with.

Tommy made no motion to answer the phone until Jude prompted him, telling him it was probably Darius and that he shouldn't leave their boss hanging. Reluctantly, or so she hoped, he pulled away from her and picked up the phone, simply saying "yes" and "sure" a few times before hanging it up. "D needs me to look over a few shows he wants to put together for Micah."

"No worries," Jude replied.

They stood and began making their way back to the studio so he could get to work and she could get her car. As he was about to enter the building, Tommy stopped her. "I want to finish this conversation later."

Nodding her head, Jude agreed. "Sure. I'm touring some venues tomorrow and meeting with their owners, but I'm free around six."  
>"Great. I'll be done around then too. How 'bout I come over after I'm done at the studio and cook for you."<p>

The smile that graced her face was sweet and full of love. She couldn't help but respond like that when he was so completely perfect and thoughtful. "I'd like that." After giving him a hug, she walked to her car, calling "See you tomorrow, Quincy" over her shoulder.

Through the rest of the evening, Jude couldn't help but be distracted. She had a hard time focusing on Celeste, and couldn't seem to carry on a conversation to save her life. Eventually, her new friend left, and she was crawled into bed. Surprised that it was only ten o'clock, Jude realized that she didn't care and turned off her light. Letting a restless sleep take over, Jude continued to think about what the following day would bring. She worried about Tommy coming over and what would come of their relationship, how he would react if she told him that she was in love with him.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

Waiting in the checkout line at the grocery store around the corner from Jude's building, Tommy couldn't help but tap his fingers on the counter impatiently. He literally ran out of the studio as soon as the clock hit six, knowing that he would have to stop for some ingredients before getting to Jude's.

After the excursion to the record store and subsequent walk yesterday, Tommy had thought of little other than their dinner this evening. He knew that she had been holding back the day before, not telling him everything that had gone on with Chuck. Yes, she told him that she wasn't seeing Chuck, but something had to have happened for that decision to have been made. Before they left for tour, and even on tour, according to Kwest, the pair had been super close—always together and always smiling. His hope was that she would be honest with him tonight. He wanted to know what had changed and why she didn't seem to have the same kind of joy that used to prevail in everything she did.

Finally, the cashier rang up the few vegetables and steaks he bought and, after paying, he was free to go. Quickly walking to his car and finally on his way, Tommy was able to make it to Jude's loft in under ten minutes. Climbing up the stairs, he was surprised to find the door open, but walked inside nonetheless. "Jude?" he called out.

"Hey!" came a voice from upstairs. A second later, Jude appeared at the top of the staircase with a smile on her face. "Sorry, I got back and seriously had to pee."

Tommy couldn't help the chuckle that escaped his mouth at her words. He loved how blunt she could be with no inhibitions. "No worries, I get it. But Jude, you shouldn't leave your door unlocked like that."

"Oh, it was like five minutes, at most. I'm fine."

"But Jude, you know this isn't the best area of town, what if…"

"That is exactly why I put in a security system for the entire building. No one would be able to get in unless they had a key card."

Knowing that it was somewhat of a lost cause to continue badgering her, Tommy sighed. "Fine, just promise me you'll be careful."

"I promise," she assured before coming down the stairs.

He smiled at her agreement and went to meet her at the bottom of the stairs. Not able to help himself, he gave her what was meant to be a quick hug, but it ended up lasting longer than planned. Eventually, he separated from her and let her to the little kitchenette. "So, I picked up some steaks and veggies to grill…you do still have that bar-b-que on the landing outside, right?"

"Yeah, it's there. But I think the last time it was used was right before you came back. For my birthday, I think."

"Figures," he commented with a smirk. For a brief moment, a sadness washed over him. He desperately wished that he had been there to celebrate her birthday with her. But, that was just over six months ago, and there was nothing he could really do to change it at this point. "Let me get these started. I'll be right back, okay?"

"Sounds good," she agreed. "You want something to drink?"

"Glass of wine if you have it," he called over his shoulder as he climbed through the window. While waiting for the grill to warm, he thought about the night. Yes, he wanted more information about what really happened between Jude and Chuck, but he was truly looking forward to just spending time with her. They hadn't had a low-key evening like this in a long time, and was excited to just be with her.  
>Movement behind him caused Tommy to turn. Seeing Jude with a glass of red wine, he smiled and took it from her. "Thanks."<p>

"No problem. I'm gonna get some comfy clothes on, 'kay? I'll be right back."

"You're fine. It'll take about a half an hour until the steaks are done."

She smiled and quickly disappeared from his view, heading upstairs to change, he assumed. Focusing his eyes back on the steaks on the grill in front of him, Tommy let his thoughts wander to his girl. Not surprisingly, thoughts of her brought on bursts of musical inspiration, and tonight was no different. Earlier, in the market, a tune had been going through his head and it continued to develop as he continued grilling.

Thirty minutes later, the food was on plates and the pair were sitting on the ground in front of the coffee table. Tommy noticed that he only ever seemed to get that comfortable with her, but wasn't really surprised by it. She asked about Sasha and he shared how he had taken her to a doggie day-care for the night, wanting to socialize her with other dogs. They talked about the progress of Micah's album and how SME were doing now that they were getting back into the studio. As they finished eating, the subject of Jude's album came up, bringing a stoic and contemplative expression to her face. "What's going on?" he asked her.

She paused for a moment, moving her plate and napkin to the coffee table in front of her before looking down at her hands. "You still haven't told me what you thought of my song…you know, the one from yesterday…"

Though she didn't phrase it like a question, he knew it was one. "Jude, the song was…" He paused, trying to figure out the right words to describe how amazing the song was. "It was perfect. It's emotional and honest, super personal, but something everyone can relate to." Taking her hand, he told her, "I love it."

"Really?"

She seemed so unsure, and he wanted nothing more than to hold her close and reassure her of how wonderful the song was, not to mention how perfect she was. Instead, he settled for putting an arm around her and drawing her close. Kissing the top of her head, he told her, "Jude, it was perfect. If Darius wasn't so traditional, I would say it could be your first single."

Tilting her head, she looked up at him and smiled. In that moment, it was as if nothing else in the world existed. Unable to stop himself, Tommy once again kissed her, this time on the cheek that was closest to him. For a moment, his gaze lingered on hers, eyes connected and souls intertwined. Unconsciously, he began to lean closer to her, the desire to kiss her becoming overwhelming.

The loud alarm of her cell phone startled them both, and Tommy took a deep breath as she got up to check on who had been trying to get ahold of her. Quickly texting back the person on the other end of the phone, Jude told him, "Sorry, Spied was wondering if I would be able to work with them on lyrics tomorrow."

"No worries," he replied in a low voice. He was still in a bit of a daze because of their moment and was having a hard time recovering.  
>Jude gathered up their plates and rinsed them off in the sink, putting them in the drying rack before returning to the floor with the half-empty bottle of wine. After refilling his glass, she joined him on the ground again, leaning against the couch for support.<p>

His arm snaked it's way behind her and around her shoulders before he could process his actions, but when she subconsciously leaned closer to him, Tommy didn't regret his actions in the slightest. Again, he placed a sweet kiss on the side of her head before asking, "Do you have any other new stuff in the works?"

Her eyes opened and glanced in his direction. She was silent for a moment, almost as if debating whether or not to tell him what she had been working on. "Well, you've obviously got something good in that journal of yours…let me see." He could see her hesitation, but he was determined to see whatever new material she had.

Just when he was about to begin begging, she sighed. Reaching to the couch behind her, Jude grabbed her journal. Flipping through it, she stopped on a page and handed the book to him. Not wanting to remove his arm from around her, Tommy set down his wine and took the journal, taking a moment to focus on the words on the page and the accompanying chords.

There were no words to describe how perfect the song was. The lyrics were honest and sincere, but not too heavy. He could imagine Jude playing it at one of the concerts D and Portia were working on setting up for her—just her with an acoustic and a stool on the stage. Wanting to get the full effect, Tommy looked up from the journal and asked, "Play it for me?"

Though she didn't give a verbal response, Jude nodded her head and moved to stand. Once up, she grabbed her acoustic from the music corner and returned back to the couches. Facing him, she sat and began a to strum an upbeat tempo.

_The night is deafening when the silence is listening  
>And I'm down on my knees and I know that something is missing.<br>Because the back of my mind is holding things I'm relying in  
>But I choose to ignore it because I'm always denying them.<em>

_I'm a bit of a manic when it's not as I plan it  
>Cause I start losing my head and then I get up in a panic<br>Remember when we were kids and always knew when to quit it  
>Are we denying a crisis or are we scared of admitting it?<em>

_I don´t want to know,  
>I just want to run to you<br>And break off the chains and throw them away  
>I just want to be so much<br>And shake off the dust that turned me to rust  
>Sooner than later I'll need a saviour<br>I'll need a saviour_

_It won't ever change if you want it to stay the same  
>I really hate it but I know it's hard to choose if you're chained<br>And when it's all you control cause you've got nothing less to hold  
>You're getting tighter and tighter it's getting harder to let it go<em>

_I don't want to know  
>I just want to run to you<br>And break off the chains and throw them away  
>I just want to be so much<br>And shake off the dust that turned me to rust  
>Sooner than later I'll need a saviour<br>I'll need a saviour_

_Stand me up and maybe I won't be so small  
>Free my hands and feet and maybe I won't always fall...<br>Save me_

_I just want to run to you  
>And break off the chains and throw them away<br>I just want to be so much  
>And shake off the dust that turned me to rust<br>I just want to run to you  
>And break off the chains and throw them away<br>I just want to be so much  
>And shake off the dust that turned me to rust<br>Sooner than later I'll need a saviour  
>I'll need a saviour.<em>

She finished singing, but continued to strum lightly on the guitar, seeming to wait for his reaction.

Listening to the melody coming from the guitar, Tom sat in still for a moment, still lost in his own thoughts. There was no denying that he loved the song, but more than that, it was the way she sang it. Though the song was about wanting to break free and be strong, there seemed to still be a question in her eyes. Rather, it was as if her eyes were a window into her soul, haunted and insecure.

Slowly, Jude let her fingers finish caressing the strings on her guitar and set it behind her. Her eyes were on the ground in front of her, not meeting his gaze.

Growing frustrated with her lack of contact with him, Tommy reached up and grasped one of her hands. "Jude…"

When her eyes darted up to meet his, Tommy couldn't help but smile. She had the same look as a child might when waiting for approval from a parent. Moving his hands to grasp hers, he gently pulled her toward him. Maneuvering both of them so that she was tucked into his side, Tommy made sure his arm was securely around her before praising the song. "Jude, it was amazing!"

"You think so?" Again, he was reminded of a child so eager to please and succeed.

"I know so." Placing a gentle kiss on the top of her head, he continued, "Honestly, I think it would be the perfect single to premier your new stuff."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

They sat in silence for another moment before Tommy gave in. He had been wracking his mind trying to figure out when she wrote this and who it was about. "So…" he started, hoping she would divulge what her inspiration had been on her own. When she didn't say anything, Tommy couldn't help the smirk that curled onto his lips. "So, where did the song come from?"

Glancing down at her face, he saw her close her eyes. Grabbing her hand, Tommy tried to reassure her with his touch. For a few moments, no one made a sound. Jude's silence only made him more curious to know what she was trying to break free from, and more, who she wanted to run to.

Her voice almost made him jump, startling him despite how quiet she was. "I guess it goes back to when I was on tour."

"Okay…" He tried to prompt her for more, but she shook her head no. Abruptly she stood, taking the two empty wine glasses from the table and putting them in the sink. Coming back to the living room, she grabbed the empty wine bottle and walked it to her recycling bin before making her way back to the couch.

Tommy watched her movements, trying to understand what had her so nervous all of a sudden. Thankfully, she came back to the couch and sat down, patting the spot in front of her and motioning her head. He got that she wanted him on the couch, so moved up quickly.

"First, let's finish our conversation from yesterday."

"Okay…" He was slightly confused, assuming she meant the conversation about Chuck. Thankfully, before he had to ask for further clarification, she began to speak.

"Yesterday you asked me how I felt about the Chuck and Celeste "situation"." At his nod, she continued. "I was being honest yesterday when I said that I was fine with it. Chuck is a good friend. He was there for me when I needed someone and he knows how to make me laugh. He inspires me and brings out a different side of my music that has been awesome to explore."

Hearing her go on about how wonderful she thought Chuck was made Tommy want to cringe. He was getting what he wanted – answers – but he didn't like where things were going. Opening his mouth to speak, he quickly shut it when Jude glared at him before speaking again.

"On tour, we spent a lot of time together. At nights, we would hang out on one of the buses with Sam and watch movies and talk…just be together. Seriously, I don't think we spent more than ten waking minutes without the other unless we were performing. We kissed a few times, and I guess you could say we were dating, but it wasn't really anything serious. Things were fun and light and low-key…they were easy. But, we both realized that we wanted different things."

"Jude, what could be so different that you weren't able to work it out?"

"We just…" She shrugged her shoulders in a move that was reminiscent of the day prior. "Waking Blind is just getting started. He wants stadium tours and endorsement deals…he wants to be a rock star. I'm in a different place. When I was just getting started I wanted those things too, so I get it. Besides, taking care of Sam during the tour made me realize that I want to be a mom and raise a family…sooner, rather than later. I don't want to wait years until that can happen."

"I get that," Tommy told her. He knew there was more to it, but wasn't sure if he should push or not. He wanted her honesty, but he didn't want to break her in the process. Deciding to say something, he tried not to press too hard by saying, "I feel like you're holding something back…"

Nodding her head up and down, she closed her eyes. Tommy watched her closely for signs that it was too much. He was about to tell her to not worry about it, but she surprised him by opening her mouth. Eyes still closed, she began speaking in a low voice. It was as if she didn't have the energy to speak at a volume any louder, and it was amazing that something so simple would cause his heart to ache.

"It's true that we are at different places. He wants arenas, I want something more low key…acoustic shows, producing, mentoring other artists, writing…" She let the words hang for a moment before continuing. "When I was gone, about three weeks in, Spied and I were talking on the phone and he opened my eyes to a couple of things that I hadn't wanted to acknowledge."

Tommy could see how hard it was for her continue, the pain in her eyes and the emotional exhaustion that had taken over her body. As much as he hated seeing her suffer, he wanted to know the full story. He wanted to know what happened with Chuck. He wanted to know where she was at now. Giving her knee a quick rub of support, he smiled at her when she looked up. Despite the pain that was there, he saw determination in her eyes, and so he waited for her to continue.

"I know that you and I didn't talk during the tour."

He nodded his head at her statement, knowing that she was going somewhere.

"I was trying to use the tour as a way to get some distance from you. I felt like my world was starting to revolve around you and that couldn't happen again, I had to separate myself from you, ya know? When you left the first time, I broke, and I couldn't let that happen again. The only way I thought I could separate from you was to get away. That's where _Saviour_ came from. I wanted so badly to escape and break free from this reliance I had on you, but it was like I couldn't do it myself..." Taking another breath, she continued. "Anyways, once I was gone, I realized that being away didn't help. Honestly, it made things worse. So, rather than give in and call, I filled my time. There literally wasn't a minute that I wasn't doing something or surrounded by people. It was exhausting, but it was the only way I was able to not break down." She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, seeming to need a moment.

Overwhelmed by the revelations she had made thus far, Tommy didn't mind the pause in her explanation. Honestly, he was glad for a moment to process all that she had revealed.

As she sat on her couch, Jude tried to work up the nerve to continue. She had decided to be honest with him, but it was so much harder than she expected. As much as she wanted to get everything off her chest and tell him that she was hopelessly in love with him and nothing would change that, Jude was terrified. Though her eyes were closed, the image of him in front of her wouldn't leave. Knowing that she had to gather courage and continue, she took one last deep breath, exhaling as much negative energy and fear that she had been holding onto. "After Spied and I talked, I realized that I wasn't being fair to myself, let alone Chuck. After being an ass and ignoring him for a few days, he confronted me and I explained what was going on. He was upset with how I handled things, so we didn't talk the rest of the tour. A couple of days after getting back we met for coffee and I apologized, he met Celeste and the rest is history. How I handled things was wrong, but he understood that I wasn't trying to hurt him or anything."

A silence settled over the pair after she finished speaking and opened her eyes. Though it wasn't necessarily awkward, Jude could see that Tommy was deep in thought. Closing her eyes again, she was startled when she heard his voice come over the quiet.

"I'm sorry that you were so..." He paused before starting again. "No, I'm sorry that I hurt you so much that you felt like escaping was the only solution. Jude, I…"

She couldn't let him continue. "Tommy, I don't want you to feel guilty or sorry for all of that…we've already been over it." Reaching in front of her, she grabbed his hand. "I have been hiding behind my fear for so long that I didn't really know how to function without it. But, I've realized that I can't let things pass me by because I'm scared about what could happen."

For some reason, her nervousness seemed to be receding, and a sense of confidence began to take over. Still holding onto his hand, she decided to lay her heart on the line. "In the past few weeks, I've realized how much I love making music. I love creating something so personal and deeply a part of me. I love the release that only seems to come when I perform. I love getting lost in the music and letting myself be taken away. Music is a part of me…"

Jude stopped to catch her breath before opening her mouth again. "But, I've realized that I need people around me too. If there aren't people to share the music with, then it doesn't mean as much, it doesn't reach its full potential. But, I also know that music can't be all-consuming in my life. I want to fall in love with the man that is head over heals for me...get married...I want to be a mom and teach our kids about passion and life. There's always the possibility that things won't work out the way I want them to, but I can't let that get in our way of something amazing."

As she let her confessions settle, Jude closed her eyes again and leaned into the back cushion of the sofa. It was amazingly freeing to let go of the desires she had held onto and kept close to her heart. Only Spied and Sadie had known about her struggle to pretend that everything was fine for almost two years. Only they understood how much she craved being lost in the music and being connected to someone…connected to him.

"Our kids? Our way?" Lost in her own thoughts, Jude was again startled by his voice.

Confused, Jude thought back over what she had just told Tommy. Realizing that she may have let an "our kids" comment slip by, she didn't know what to say. As much as she wanted to be honest, she hadn't intended to let that out.

"What did you mean by 'our kids', Jude?" Her lack of a response apparently prompted further questions from Tommy.

His tone was flat and unemotional, and Jude could only hope it was because he was confused or uncertain. The possibility that he was repulsed by the thought of them having kids together was at the forefront of her mind, but throwing caution to the wind, she launched into a rambling explanation. "Tommy, since you came back, I've been fighting my feelings because I was afraid that we wouldn't work and I would be left broken hearted. But, I know now that I can't let my fear get in the way of the one thing I really want…one of the things that matters most." Not sure how to say what she wanted without seeming crazy, Jude paused.

She was saved from an immediate response when Tommy asked, "And what do you want, Jude? What really matters?"

"You." The answer was out of her mouth before her brain comprehended the question. Realizing how crazy that may sound, Jude tried to explain. "You will always be the most important person in my life because I love you. I've been trying to hide it or ignore it for so long, but I can't anymore. I know that I've been hot and cold and confusing as hell, but I can't help it. Chuck and I wouldn't have worked because I'm in love with you." She bit her lip and watched him from beneath her eyelashes.

After a moment he asked, "You're in love with me?"

Shrugging her shoulders, Jude nodded her head in agreement. "Yeah."

Slowly, she watched as he began to nod his head in response. But after a full three minutes of silent head nodding, she couldn't take it anymore. Just as she was about to apologize for dumping so much on him and take it all back, Tommy stood.

"Okay," he told her before walking out her front door.

She could only stare after him as his strides carried him away from her. When the slamming of her door startled her out of the trance she was in, Jude called out, "Tommy? Tommy!"

Slowly, the reality that he left began to sink in, and Jude was at a loss of what to do. Her whole body began to ache, and tears began to pour down her face. Legs crossed beneath her, Jude cried and thought about what to do next. Hours passed as the tears continued to fall, reminders of the heartbreak she had endured once before, only this time so much worse.

Sometime around two o'clock in the morning, Jude knew that she had to get away. She had just handed her heart to Tom Quincy, and he let it fall on the ground and shatter into a million pieces.

Standing, Jude grabbed her phone from the counter and sent a quick text message to Sadie, Spied, and Chuck: _Taking a few days off…be back soon enough._

The song Jude plays is _Saviour_, written and performed by Lights. Imagine it being played acoustically, not with the electronic effects.


	18. Chapter 18

Hey all,

So, here is Chapter 18 for your reading pleasure. Sorry to leave you all hanging for so long, but no worries...it will all make sense, I promise:)

[center][b]Chapter 18[/b][/center]

Surrounded by a quiet darkness, Jude barely noticed the stains trailing down her cheeks. Her heart was heavy, and the physical distance between her and Toronto did nothing to ease the pain and emptiness she felt.

She had arrived at the farmhouse less than an hour before sunrise. Upon walking in the front door, Jude had gone straight to her room, dropped her belongings on the floor, grabbed the comforter from her bed, and stepped onto her balcony. Wrapping herself up and laying back onto the lounge chair, she watched the sun rise through the trees and end up over her head.

Not surprisingly, sleep would not come, and Jude roused herself an hour or so after she had laid out. With a racing mind that would not seem to

stop, she decided some fresh air might help, and grabbed an extra sweater before heading outside.

The day was filled with long walks, many tears, and multiple ignored phone calls. First, Tommy started to call around eight o'clock, then there was Sadie, Spied, and Chuck, each leaving multiple messages when she didn't pick up. Eventually, Jude turned off her phone, not wanting to deal with anyone for the time being. Late in the afternoon, with tired legs that could not be coerced into walking another step, Jude sat down in the living room of the farmhouse, pulled out her journal and guitar, and began to play.

Soon, as the accompaniment began to dance through her fingers, words began to form. For hours she wrote, trying to transcribe the sense of loss that still consumed her. As the night wore on, Jude continued to create. She knew that it wouldn't take away the hurt and pain that Tom Quincy had, once again, caused her; but despite that, the words wouldn't stop.

He had captivated her completely, her heart belonged to him. Her only hope was to be able to work through the hurt enough to work with him in the future. Regardless of the damage he had inflicted on her soul, he was a damn good producer—one of the best in the world—and she would have nothing less than the absolute best for her album.

But, even though it was a completely rational decision to have Tom still the co-producer on her album, it didn't make the ache in her heart go away. In fact, in some ways, it was worse—knowing that they would be working so closely.

With a mild resolve, Jude had sat up a little straighter and reached for the bag next to her. But, pulling out a piece licorice and putting it in her mouth, the tears started almost immediately. It didn't matter how hard she tried, Jude was constantly reminded of him. Earlier in the day she had been going through the kitchen to see if there was anything to eat when she stumbled upon an unopened bag of Red Vines. Her initial thought had been to throw it away, but she was unable to, wanting to hand onto a tangible reminder of the man who consumed her heart.

[i]So much for moving on[/i], she told herself. Her thought was not in anger, simply an acknowledgement that moving on from Tom Quincy would be a hell of a lot harder than anything she had ever done in her life.

Sitting on the floor and clutching the nearly empty licorice bag, Jude let the tears fall, knowing it was no use trying to stop them. A good half-an-hour passed before they began to subside, and it was another ten minutes before they were gone completely.

Eyes closed, she allowed the silence to attempt to sooth her soul. Taking deep breaths in and out, Jude tried to clear her mind, but it was to no avail. Sighing, she was about to stand when the obnoxious ringing of the farmhouse landline broke the veil of silence that had surrounded her.

She only knew of two people who had the number, and one of them was somewhere in Europe last time she checked. With her mom out of the question, Jude knew it had to be her dad, and if he was calling, it would likely be serious. Scrambling over to the phone, she picked it up. "Hello?"

…

It was barely eight o'clock as he strolled into G Major, coffee in hand, hair perfectly coifed, and signature leather jacket in place. Anyone looking on would think he had it all together, but that was the very reason for the sunglasses covering his eyes. He had barely slept last night, so torn up about what Jude had confessed and the way he handled it.

After tossing and turning for hours, it was still the middle of the night when a quick shot of whiskey and the slow consummation of another glass found him sitting on the floor by his couch, guitar in hand. The alcohol seemed to slow his mind down enough to process the events of his evening, and the guitar offered a strange sense of familiar reassurance and stability.

The entire evening at Jude's had been great, at least until he screwed everything up. Dinner was fine, the wine was good, and their conversation was constant. They had been close and affectionate with each other, and it was all he could do to not throw her onto the couch and kiss her like he had wanted to for so long. But, despite the intense temptation that was Jude, it was one of the best nights he had enjoyed in a while—relaxing and entertaining.

It wasn't until they had finished eating that things had started to turn. Not surprisingly, he had wanted to see if she had any new music. Though Jude was usually excited to show him her new material, she had been hesitant, making him all the more curious. Though seemingly reluctant, she had agreed and showed him the lyrics. But when she played the song, Tommy was struck. He had been overwhelmed by the song, loving the light tune paired with the honest lyrics, the struggle between letting go and breaking free.

He realized that she hadn't exactly told him what the song was about, but the conversation that followed had been insightful and confusing enough to distract him from asking about it again. Jude had admitted that dating Chuck, even though the term was to be applied very loosely, had been a way to escape and occupy her time. She confessed her brokenness when he left the first time, how it affected everything she did. She acknowledged her desire to get married and have kids…his kids. Finally, she told him she loved him.

It had been those words that knocked his world off its axis entirely.

Jude Harrison, the girl who had haunted him for years, loved him.

Jude Harrison, the woman he loved, loved him too.

He had been so blown away by her confession that a single word would not come to mind. He literally had nothing to say despite the revelation she laid before him. Only 2 thoughts were alternating in his mind: the truth that she loved him, and the overwhelming desire to jump on top of her and show her how much she meant to him.

After sitting for a few moments trying to control himself, the ravenous need to have her crushed and overwhelmed him. Standing, he simply said, "Okay," and left her sitting there. He could hear her calling after him, but didn't allow himself the luxury of looking back, knowing that it would break his resolve.

As much as he wanted to be with her in every sense of the words, Tommy had known that neither one of them were ready for that step in their relationship. So, knowing that his willpower was weakening, he left.

Of course, knowing that his reaction was far from positive and that Jude was probably mad as hell at him, Tommy hadn't been able to sleep a bit. Even Sasha seemed to be irritated with him, staying out of his room and out of his way the entire night. Eventually, he had given into his restlessness and gotten up. After a therapeutic glass of whiskey, he sat with his guitar and poured all the emotion he had been confronted with into a song. A few hours later, the lyrics were complete and the music was well on its way, and Tommy knew that the song would have to be on his album.

He had eventually tired of fretting over finishing the song and had decided to get ready for the day ahead. It was nearly five o'clock in the morning by then, and he figured he might as well grab a shower and get started. While in the shower, he had devised what he thought would be the perfect explanation to give to Jude in an effort to make her understand that he loved her too.

And he did. He loved her with everything in him and wanting nothing more than to spend his life telling her and showing her. After donning a "classic Tommy" ensemble, he headed out to grab some coffee before hitting the studio.

While he knew that Jude wouldn't be in for a while—she had never been a morning person—Tommy knew that he would get nothing else done at home. But, it was already past noon, and he still hadn't seen her. Though that wouldn't normally cause him concern, he remembered that she had agreed to help Spied and the boys with lyrics that day, and they had already been in the studio for over an hour.

When another hour passed by slowly, Tom stood to search for his girl. From his desk, he could see the door to Studio A, where SME was currently recording, and hadn't seen Jude enter at all during the day, so he began searching in the kitchenette. Making his way through the other offices, the board room, the small and cramped Studio C, and even the storage closet at the end of the hall, Tommy was out of options and still had yet to see Jude. In a last attempt at determining whether she was even at the Studio, he went out the back door and checked the parking lot for signs of her car.

With no Mustang in sight, it was clear that Jude was not at the studio. Heading back inside, Tommy went into Studio A looking for answers.

"Hey, Squinty." Raising his eyebrows, Spied further questioned, "Why do you look so squinted today?"

Glaring at the younger man, Tom rolled his eyes and glared before responding. "Well, [i]Vincent[/i], I was wondering if you knew where Jude was. Wasn't she going to do lyrics with you this afternoon?"

A look of recognition crossed Spiederman's face as he nodded his head. "Yeah, she was, but I got a message this morning that she was gonna get away for a few days."

"She what?" Tommy asked, panicked at the thought that he didn't know where Jude was. He needed to talk to her today, otherwise he could lose her forever.

"Got out of town for a few days, I think. She didn't say where, but you know she won't be gone for long." Turning back to his guitar, Spied didn't see the wide-eyes and furrowed brow.

Moving out of the studio, Tommy's mind was such a blur that he didn't realize his best friend was standing right in front of him until they had nearly collided. A mumbled, "Sorry, man," was all Tommy could say before continuing on to his office. Slamming the door upon entering, he was only mildly surprised when the door did not close. Looking up, he saw Kwest standing there. Ignoring him, Tommy fell into his chair and let his head rest on its back.

"Obviously something happened…" Kwest left the statement hanging, waiting to see if Tommy would share what had been going on. When he didn't say anything, Kwest continued. "Sadie got a text from Jude around four o'clock this morning saying she was getting away and you look like hell. What happened last night?"

Sighing, Tommy let his head fall into his hands, and let out a groan.

When he didn't give any explanation, Kwest asked, "Man, what did you do?"

Looking up to meet his friend's gaze, Tommy couldn't help but shake his head. "Kwest..."

"No, Tom. You're gonna tell me exactly what happened."

"Fine." Taking a deep breath, he repeated it, "Fine." After a moment, he began. "We decided to have dinner last night. Everything was great, we were talking and just hanging out. She played me the most amazing song, and then she started to tell me about Chuck."

"You already know Chuck though. I mean, you've been working with him for the past few months."

Rolling his eyes at Kwest's interruption, Tommy continued. "Sure, I knew Chuck, but I didn't know about them. Since coming back from tour, they haven't been as close, not to mention his new thing with Celeste."

"Right..." Kwest nodded his understanding.

"I won't tell you the whole conversation, but she ended up saying something about our kids. It didn't even hit me until a minute later. When I asked her about it, she told me she wanted me. Then she said that the reason her and Chuck wouldn't have ever really worked was because she loved me." The last words came out in a lower tone, Tommy being unsure as to how his friend, and Jude's brother-in-law would react.

"She told you she loved you?"

"Yep." Tommy didn't know what else to say, so instead, he closed his eyes and groaned as his head fell back to his hands.

After a few minutes of silence, Kwest's voice broke through his dark misery. "What did you do?"

When Tommy gave no response, his friend's voice became stern, his eyes carrying a bit of darkness that hadn't been present before. "Tom, your girl tells you she loves you, something you've been waiting to hear for how long? But somewhere between last night and this morning, you look like hell and Jude disappeared. What did you do?" The question was asked deliberately, each word enunciated clearly.

Knowing that Kwest wouldn't like his response, he mumbled, "I left..."

"I couldn't have heard correctly, because I thought you just said that you left..."

"I did...and before you say anything, I know it was a mistake!"

"Then what made you do it?" Kwest yelled.

"I had to! I had to leave or else I would have jumped her! I know we aren't ready for that, but I literally couldn't think of anything other than wanting to be with her. And yeah, I know I didn't handle it right, but I couldn't let myself go there because she deserves more than that."

"I get that you wanted to be all 'noble,' T, but come on! Did you have no self control?"

"That's just it, Kwest! When it comes to Jude, I [i]don't[/i] have any self control!" Though Tommy had always been able to control himself, and truly thrived in holding all the control in relationships, Jude was different. When Jude walked into his life years ago, Tommy's game had been forever shaken, and his world completely knocked off its axis.

"You really are an idiot, man."

"You think I don't know that?" Tommy asked. "I know that I may have just screwed up the one things that really mattered in my life. Since meeting her, Jude is the only thing I've wanted. I need her more than anything, and without her, my life wouldn't be worth living. On top of all that, I don't even know where she is or if she's okay." Bloodshot eyes connected with Kwest's before asking, "So, what the hell do I do now?"

…

Waiting to hear a response from the other end of the phone line, Jude was curious as to what was going on. When there was still no answer, she began to panic slightly. "Dad, what's wrong?"

"Dude, it isn't your dad."

"Spied? Is something wrong with Dad? How did you get this number?" If her dad wasn't the one on the phone, then maybe something was wrong with him. At that thought, her chest began to constrict and her breath was shallow.

"Jude, take a deep breath, everything is fine with your dad and Sadie."

Hearing that, she calmed slightly. But still, the fact that Spied was calling the farmhouse land line made her a bit nervous. Thankfully, she didn't have to wait for an explanation from the man on the other end of the line.

"I've been calling you all day, but you weren't answering or responding."

"Sorry, the prospect of explaining myself a thousand times over wasn't high on my list of things to do today."

"No need to be so snippy, Dude. I just wanted to check in with you and see how you are. I don't need to know details or anything, I just wanted to make sure you were okay."

Despite the initial anxiety she had at hearing the phone ring, Jude couldn't help the slight turning up of her lips. Spied was simply trying to be a good friend, make sure that she was doing okay. "Sorry, Spied." She considered how to respond, but eventually settled by saying, "I'll be okay."

"Jude…"

"Spied, don't. I'll be fine, I just need to work through some things."

"If you're sure…"

"Positive." Wanting to focus the conversation on something other than her heartbreak, Jude asked, "How was the studio today?"

"Fine, we got started on some new sounds which are pretty cool, but I think we're really gonna need your help putting lyrics together."

"No problem," she told him. "I'll let you know when I get back." She still wasn't sure how long she would be at the farmhouse. While she knew that she would have to go back home eventually, Jude also knew that it wouldn't be easy.

"Any idea when that will be, Dude?"

Something with the way he asked alerted Jude that there might be an ulterior motive to his phone call. Warily, she told him, "I don't know, Spied. Why?"

He was silent for a moment, prompting Jude to ask, "Spied?"

"Dude, I know you may not want to hear it, but Tommy was pretty freaked out today. He looked like he didn't sleep at all and when I told him you weren't going to be at the studio, he looked like he could cry. And one of the interns said that he spent a majority of his day looking at his phone and calling someone…I assume the someone was you?"

"Yeah," Jude whispered. She was unsure of what to think about Tommy's behavior. He obviously felt bad, but it didn't change the fact that his reaction to her confession the night prior broke her, yet again. Despite the ache that had began to consume her yet again, Jude didn't want Tommy to be worried and distressed. "Spied, I'll be home in a few days, but I have to go now."

"'Kay, Dude. I'll see you later."

Not even acknowledging his goodbye, Jude put the phone back in its cradle and stared at it before moving towards the kitchen. After turning off her phone earlier that day, Jude had left it on the kitchen counter knowing she wouldn't need it.

Picking up the phone, she turned it on and waited for it to load. Once it did, she ignored the numerous missed calls, voice mails, and text messages, instead typing in a new message to Tommy. [i]No need to be worried about me…just needed some time. Be back in a few days.[/i]

Pressings "send," Jude waited until the message was gone from her screen until shutting off her phone for the second time that day. Climbing the stairs to her room, Jude was easily distracted with thoughts of Tommy and the good times they had shared over the past few years. Regardless of what happened with them, he had been her best friend for so long that she knew she couldn't cut him from her life completely.

But, with a renewed sense of determination, she decided that moving on was imperative. If she couldn't let Tom Quincy go as a romantic prospect, she would live a life unsatisfied and alone, and that wasn't an option.

…

Already half-way through his second beer, Tommy stood on his balcony overlooking Toronto. After his talk with Kwest in the studio, he knew that no work would get done for the rest of the day. Though he had some confidence that Jude was physically safe, he knew that she wasn't emotionally okay. After staring at his computer and listening to her music for a few hours, Tom had left the studio. Thankfully, he wasn't set to work with Micah that afternoon, so leaving early wasn't noticed by anyone as far as he knew.

As he stared out at the city laid below him, Tommy mentally berated himself for his response to Jude's confessions the night prior. An involuntary shiver shook his body, and he realized for the first time how cold it was. Heading back inside, he swallowed the rest of his beer and grabbed another out of the fridge. Popping the cap off, he drained half of it immediately, wanting to numb the pain that had infiltrated his entire body.

For the first time in hours, Tommy noticed his phone sitting on the breakfast bar. A small flashing light indicated that there was a message, and opening his mailbox, a surge of hope raced through his body. Tapping the necessary keys to bring up the message on the screen, his heart sank as quickly as it had risen before.

[center][i]No need to be worried about me…just needed some time. Be back in a few days.[/i][/center]

The black and white letters stared back at him, mocking his mistake of letting her go. In a single gulp, he finished off the rest of his beer and went to the kitchen. From a tall cabinet over the refrigerator, he pulled out the bottle of whiskey, knowing that he would need something far stronger in order to dull the pain that was, once again, taking over his body. Downing the first shot, Tommy quickly poured another before moving into the living room, glass and bottle each held tightly.

Sitting on his couch, he was unaware as hours passed by, his thoughts permeated by her despite his desire to focus on something else…anything else. A loud knock on the door startled him out of his reverie.

Unsure of how much time had passed, Tommy looked at the clock. Surprised that it was nearly midnight, his curiosity was piqued and he stood to see who was at his door so late at night. His movement caused his head to pound, and he nearly fell over from the sudden pain.

Head throbbing, he was going to sit back down and ignore whatever crazy person might be at his door in the middle of the night, but the knocking picked up again. Squinting his eyes and letting a groan escape his lips, Tommy steadied himself before slowly making his way to the front door.

As he walked through the apartment, Tommy was thankful for the lack of lights turned on, knowing that anything brighter would give him a massive headache because of the alcohol infiltrating his system. Eventually he made it to the door, opening it without glancing through the security peep hole. "Vincent?" he asked, startled to see the younger guitarist standing in front of him.

Eyes wide, Spied shook his head back and forth. "Dude, you look like hell." Pushing his way past Tommy, Spied made his way into the apartment. "Have you been drinking all night?"

After shutting the door, Tommy followed him into the living room, though at a much slower pace. Spiederman was looking at the nearly empty whisky bottle on the coffee table, but Tommy didn't feel the need to justify himself to the kid in front of him. Ignoring the guitarist, he made his way back over to the couch and fell onto it unceremoniously. Rubbing a hand over his face, he leaned back, letting his head rest on the back of the sofa.

"What's wrong with you, LTQ?"

Inhaling deeply, Tom responded with closed eyes, not having the energy or desire to open them. "Who cares?" He felt the couch next to him dip slightly and he assumed Spied was sitting there. Tommy wasn't sure why Spied was at his house, and he assumed it was to ream him out for hurting Jude, yet again.

After a few moments of silence, Spied spoke up. "Dude, I know you're not exactly in a social mood, but I figured you would want to know about Jude."

Sitting upright, Tommy opened his eyes ignoring the continued pounding in his head. "What's wrong with Jude? Is she okay?"

"Calm down, Squinty, she's fine…physically, at least. But I know that something happened the other night."

About to complain that it wasn't any of Spied's business, Tommy was stopped by a glare from the other man. While it wasn't something that would have any effect normally, the many shots of whiskey dulled his reactions.

"I don't need to know what happened, but it's obvious that something happened. Jude wouldn't leave so suddenly, especially when she was gonna be helping us out in the studio. Plus, she texted me way early this morning, and she wouldn't have been up at that time, let alone leaving town. All that on top of the fact that you looked like hell today and you almost had a panic attack when she didn't come into the studio today…all of that points to the fact that something happened."

There was a weary look in Tommy's eyes as he glanced at Spied. The kid was observant, there was no denying it. A moment passed and he nodded his head in agreement. He was about to ask if any of it mattered since Jude was clearly avoiding him, but Spied spoke up first.

A serious expression covered his face and his eyes bore into Tom. "Dude, I don't really care what happened…you can tell me if you want and, knowing you, it won't happen. Really, the only thing I care about is my best friend. She is hurting right now and I need to know how bad it is. You know that at some point in the future, you guys are gonna get close again. I can't have you keep hurting her and breaking her. So, what's the deal?"

...

There we go...Chapter 18 is done and 19 is being finished up. There isn't much more to go, and I will try to get it to you asap:) Read and review...you know those are important:)


	19. Chapter 19

**Hey all...**

**So, I feel terrible...this chapter has been nearly finished for two months, but I wanted to tighten it up a bit first. I've sort of lost my inspiration and life has gotten pretty hectic. But now, as a form of apology, I give you the final 2 chapters. The epilogue will be along within a couple of days (I hope).**

**I hope you all enjoy...let me know your thoughts.**

**AlAtt**

**Chapter 19**

For the fifth time in as many minutes, his hand slammed the steering wheel in front of him. Tommy had been sitting in his car for nearly four hours and was still nearly 30 km away from his destination. The previous night he had talked with Spied for hours, trying to explain his intentions with Jude. Though normally that kind of a conversation would leave him irritated and drinking away his frustration, Tom knew that Spied was only looking out for Jude because he wanted to the best for her. It was Tommy's job to convince the guitarist that Jude was the most important thing to him.

Initially, he wasn't going to tell the younger man anything, but once he started, the story seemed to tell itself. He started with when he left for the first time, explaining that it was because he was getting Maya for Darius. He continued to explain the journey his and Jude's relationship had taken over the last few months, even including the Anna-debacle and taking care of Sam. Finally, Tom confessed his biggest mistake: silence after Jude told him she loved him.

After that, Spied questioned Tom for nearly an hour, ensuring that he realized the severity of his mistake. It was in those minutes nearing three o'clock in the morning, that Spied finally seemed convinced of Tommy's love for Jude. Thinking back, he hoped that Jude's best friend understood how serious he was about her.

"_I've always cared."_ His response had been instantaneous when Spied asked if he cared for Jude. "_Ever since that day at the docks right after we met I knew I cared for her more than most. But at some point, I realized that I loved her; even before we went on our date, I knew that she was it for me." _He had paused for a moment, attempting to retrieve the right words to make Spied understand. "_I want everything with her to be perfect and right. She deserves the best…a fairytale. I wanted to do something amazing that will prove to her how much I love her. I know that I fucked that up by walking away, but I will do anything to make her understand that she is my world…she is everything to me. I know that there isn't anything I can do to change the fact that I walked away from the best thing I ever came close to having, but I will do anything in my power to fix it. I need her, Spied."_

From there, the conversation was brief. Spied told him where Jude was hiding out and gave him advice on what to say. When Tommy had gone to get his keys, Spied stopped him and told him to sober up and take a shower. Realizing that he smelled like a distillery, Tommy knew it was good advice and had gone straight to his room, intending to only sleep for a couple of hours.

Unfortunately, he had been more tired than expected and hadn't woken up until late in the afternoon. Though he raced to get ready, gathering a few supplies and necessities had taken some time, and Tom hadn't left until almost 5:00pm. After taking Sasha to a local doggy-day-care center, he was on his way.

The trip shouldn't have taken more than three hours or so, but one of the country roads had been shut down, leading to a huge traffic back-up and re-routing. Now, he was stuck at an intersection waiting for a light to change, ready to pull out his hair. Because of the excessive number of cars on the road, the light had cycled through multiple times already, and Tom had yet to make it through.

After another twenty minutes of waiting, Tom was near the front of the line of cars when the light changed again. Thankfully, many of the cars were turning, so he was able to gun the engine and raced forward, making it through the intersection just as the light turned red again.

With the twists and turns of the roads leading to the cabin, the drive took Tommy just under forty minutes, bringing to trip total to nearly five hours. But, as he turned down the street leading Jude's cabin, nerves started to build. By the time he reached the gravel driveway, palms sweating and heart pounding, Tommy was beginning to doubt if this was the right approach to winning back his girl. Not allowing himself to chicken out completely, he opened his car and stepped out. Without even grabbing his bag, Tommy walked up to the front door and knocked.

It seemed like hours passed in between the time his fist pounded against the door and a light turned on downstairs. He hadn't even thought to consider that Jude might be sleeping. While 10:00pm would normally be early for her, he knew how exhausting emotional turmoil could be. Waiting for the door to be opened, he turned to face his car and tried to determine what he should say...how to begin.

When the outside light turned on, Tom nearly jumped out of his skin. But when he turned around, the sight of Jude standing before him rendered him speechless. Her raised eyebrows clearly indicated her surprise at seeing him, but she opened the door further and allowed him to enter the house without a word.

Standing in the kitchen, silence enveloped the pair as they simply looked at each other. Panic was threatening to overtake Tommy as he stood close to the stove, having so much to explain and yet, no words that seemed to suffice. Suddenly, as if a dam broke, Tom was overwhelmed with a need to feel her and be with her, to show her how much she meant. Without a second thought, his legs carried him to her in two long strides and he kissed her.

One arm wrapped around her slim waist and the other took position at the back of her head, wanting to hold her next to him forever. Though only mere seconds passed before he detached his lips from hers, Tom knew that her place in his arms were perfection. Resting his forehead against hers, he attempted to search her eyes for what she was feeling. Realizing her eyes were closed, he brought his lips to hers again and, speaking against her own, whispered, "I love you."

His confession caused her eyes to snap open in surprise, but before she could get a word out, Tommy continued, tears burning his eyes and completely overtaken with the need to make her understand.. "I love you, Jude. I have for so long and I'm so sorry. I'm sorry for the way I left you the other night, I'm sorry for not telling you sooner, I'm sorry for making you leave, I'm sorry for letting you doubt me, and I'm sorry for all of the pain and hurt and heartache I've caused you. I'm sor-"

Before he could continue, a long and delicate finger was pressed to his lips and Jude leaned back to look at him as if trying to gauge his sincerity. Minutes passed without a word before she removed her finger and placed her forehead against his. "Are you sure?"

Unable to stop himself, Tom placed a light kiss against her lips. "Yes," he told her before kissing her again. "I love you, I love you, I love you." Again, he kissed her softly, but filled with promise.

"I love you, too."

Hearing the words coming out of her mouth gave Tommy more joy in that moment than he had ever felt. There was still so much to work through, but he knew that, if he could hear those words from her for the rest of his life, everything he had ever gone through would be worth it. His crappy childhood, the stupid boyband days, being Darius' minion…everything would be worth it in the end if he ended up with Jude by his side. Not able to speak, Tom fused their lips together once again.

Despite the brevity of their kisses thus far, they had been soft and sweet, but passionate and charged all at the same time. Separating from her, Tom placed a sweet kiss on her forehead and let his lips linger for a moment. "I know that we still have a lot to work through…" He knew that she would have questions and need reassurance that he was serious, but he didn't want to ruin the contentedness that was coursing through his body.

Thankfully, Jude proved how amazing she was again. With a shrug of her shoulders, Jude closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Why don't we get some tea and go up to my room to talk..."

"Are you sure?" He was still surprised that she hadn't thrown him out of the house.

The smile she gave him was sweet and sincere. "Yeah. I'll get the water started. Did you bring a bag with you?" At his nod, she continued. "Go grab your bag and put on something more comfortable. I'll meet you upstairs."

Again, he nodded his confirmation and, keys in hand, went into the cold night. Once back inside, Tom made a quick detour to the stove and kissed the top of Jude's head before heading up the stairs. Taking them two at a time, he reached the top quickly, but paused briefly, unsure of where he should put his things. Not wanting to presume too much, he went to one of the spare rooms to change and leave his bag.

Hearing movement on the stairs, Tom met Jude at the top, took one of the cups from her and followed her lead. Once in her bedroom, Tommy paused again, unsure of where she wanted him to sit. But, when she glanced up after taking a seat against the headboard, she patted the spot next to her, indicating that was where he should sit.

Once they were both settled, there was an awkward silence that had Tom feeling unsure of himself. Rather than dwell on the strangeness of the moment, Tommy turned so that he was slightly facing Jude. "I know that you probably have a lot of questions and I have a lot of explaining, but I don't really know where to start."

A light laugh escaped her lips, and Jude smiled. "I don't either."

They simply looked at each other for a moment, each lost in their own thoughts. Eventually, amidst the many swirling thoughts, Tom knew what seemed to be a reasonable place to start. Looking up at Jude again, he told her, "I am sorry. I handled things terribly."

Placing a hand over his, Jude smiled before nodding. "I know." A hint of darkness passed over her eyes before she asked, "Why did you do it, though? Why did you just leave?"

A regretful smile graced his lips. Though he knew he would have to answer, Tom wasn't sure what words would to use. "I had to." He could see the complaints and frustration on the tip of her tongue, ready to assault him, so he quickly continued. "Jude, I have loved you for so long…wanted you for so long. When you first told me that you loved me, I was literally in shock and nothing would come to mind."

Needing to feel closer to her, he grabbed her hand and entwined their fingers together. "When my brain finally started to catch up, the only thing I could process was this consuming need to be close to you and feel you. All night we had been so close and being with you was so normal. It was all I could do not to jump you…" At this, he looked at the cup in his hands. He was embarrassed at his lack of self-control and feeling guilty for his reaction that night.

"Tommy," a hand caressed his cheek and gently turned his face so that his eyes met hers.

"No." The harshness in his voice was unintentional, but he needed to finish explaining what had been going through his mind. "I knew that leaving was a dumbass move to make, but it was either that or take you then and there. And I still want that…to be that close with you, to share everything with you. But, I also know that we need to take things slow. I want to do things right with you."

Her head tilted to the side sometime during his short speech, and a slight smile graced her features. "It may not have been your finest moment, and I don't get why you had to leave. I mean, I'm not that irresistible, am I?"

Abruptly turning to set his cup on the bedside table, Tommy freed his hands to take both of Jude's. "You have no idea how irresistible you are. You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen, inside and out." The words coming out of his mouth hadn't fully been processed by his brain, and only after he said them aloud did he realize how cliché they sounded. Closing his eyes and letting his head drop, he asked, "that was incredibly cheesy, wasn't it?"

The slight grin that adorned her face brought a smile to his own. "I know that my reaction was terrible...and I know that I can never go back in time to fix that." Keeping her hands in his, Tommy shifted so that his back was once again on the headboard. Speaking almost to himself, he continued. "I can't believe that I walked away after wanting you for so long...loving you for so long." Looking at her again, he told her, "It's almost like it was too good to be true. Why the hell would you love me?"

Jude turned to place her mug of tea on the bedside table before facing him again. Her hand caressed his cheek before responding. "Tommy, you are such an amazing man..." She paused, as if unsure how to continue. "You are the first one I want to tell when something exciting happens, and the only person I want comforting me when life sucks. Whenever you're not next to me, I miss you. You push me to be better, but encourage me constantly. You have faith in me...you inspire me."

Tommy was overwhelmed by her words, but more so by the conviction behind them. He couldn't help but kiss her, needing to feel as much a part of her as possible. Separating from her, her told her again, "I love you."

A hint of uncertainty flashed in Jude's eyes before she closed them, causing his nerves to make themselves known again. He could tell that she was still struggling with the entire situation and wasn't sure where that left them...their friendship, their relationship, their future.

Her eyes opened again, and she began speaking. "Tommy, as much as I've been waiting years to hear you say that...that you love me...it doesn't necessarily fix everything."

"What do you mean?" he asked, panic raising his voice slightly higher.

"It means that I can't let those three words change things completely. I know that I love you. But, I also know that I loved you when you left last time and when you left my place the other night...and I was completely crushed both of those times. At this point, there's no changing how I feel about you, but I need for us to take it slow." Her eyes were wide in anxiety and welling with the beginnings of tears, but her gaze never left his.

Understanding came over him as she explained her hesitancy. She was terrified of being hurt again...being hurt by him. He was more determined than ever to prove to her how real and how deep his feelings ran. Wrapping his arms around her, Tom couldn't help but nuzzle the top of her head, slightly distracted by the scent that was typical Jude. Bringing himself back to focus on her uncertainty, he kissed the top of her head. "Sweetheart, I know that I have caused you so much hurt over the years, and it kills me...literally eats me up inside. But I love you." Pulling away from her so that he could look her in the eye, he continued. "I will spend every day for the rest of my life proving my love for you. You are my world." Pausing briefly, Tommy kissed her forehead. "You are my life. I know that it will take time, but I hope that I can earn your trust again."

Jude smiled at his brief, but passionate monologue. "I do trust you, Tommy, with my life. I'm just not entirely sure about trusting you with my heart yet."

While her words caused a hint of sadness to settle in his gut, Tommy knew that, with time, he could change her statement. Soon, she would know that she could trust him with everything, heart included." "One day, babe...one day." Somewhat clumsily he climbed off the bed before holding out a hand to her. "I know that there is still a lot to talk about, but I think we're probably both pretty tired. Why don't we get some sleep and we can talk more tomorrow."

Taking his hand, Jude got off of the bed. Looking up at him through her long eyelashes, her voice was quiet as she asked, "So, you're staying?"

"As long as you'll let me, Jude." He gave her a tight hug before releasing her and turning to leave the room, but stopped when her heard her voice.

"Will you stay with me...in here?"

When he turned to look at her, unsure he heard her correctly, she shrugged her shoulders. "I don't want to be alone."

He couldn't have stopped the smile if he tried. "Of course, sweetheart. Let me change and I'll be right back." Before he left her room, Tommy took a few steps to reach her and connected their lips. "I'll be back in a sec."

He left her room quickly, making his way down the hallway to the guest room where his bag was. Not wanting to presume anything, Tom changed into a pair of flannel pants and made his way to the bathroom. After washing his face and brushing his teeth, he stored everything in the guest room once again before going back into Jude's room.

She was already cocooned in between the sheets and comforter, and smiled at him when he entered the room. Taking a blanket from the chair by the bed, Tom covered himself with it after laying on top of the bed. Before Jude could verbalize the question in her eyes, he told her, "I love you. I love that I get to sleep next to you, but I don't want you to feel even a hint of pressure to do anything beyond what you feel comfortable with." Not able to help himself, he gave her a quick kiss to feel her soft lips before settling himself into a comfortable position. Smiling at how perfect it was to finally be next to Jude, Tommy relaxed and quickly drifted off into a restful sleep.

The following morning, Tom woke up feeling relaxed and refreshed. Though he had never really been a "cuddler" before, he couldn't help but want to be close to Jude. Waking up with her wrapped in his arms was amazing, and he was quickly filled with a sense of completion.

After laying there for an hour simply watching her, Tom eventually glanced at the clock and was surprised that it was nearly noon. Jude would likely be waking soon, and he decided to surprise her with breakfast in bed. After carefully extracting himself from under the blanket, Tom gave her one last glance to his sleeping girl and made his way downstairs.

Not quite thirty minutes later, he was making his way back up the stairs balancing a tray filled with eggs, toast, and tea. Making his way into Jude's room, he set the tray on the dressed before rousing her with butterfly-like kisses on her forehead, eyes, nose, and finally, her lips. When her gorgeous blue eyes opened, his heartbeat quickened and he couldn't help but give her another kiss, lingering a moment to savor the feel of her lips on his.

Smiling, Jude glanced around the room once he backed away from her. "What smells so good?"

"I thought you might be hungry since it's almost noon, so I brought some toast and eggs. Sound good?"

"Perfect. Thank you!"

After she situated herself in a more upright position, Tommy brought over the tray and handed her a plate of food. After serving her, he went to the other side of the bed and took a seat next to her. "So, what's the plan for today?"

Over the simple breakfast, Jude told him about the past couple of days she had spent at the cabin. She confessed the tears she had cried, causing his own heart to ache again at the pain he caused her. He couldn't help but smile at the thought of her clutching a bag of licorice, loving that such a little thing brought such a strong memory of him, but hating that he put her through hell once again.

Long after the food was gone, Tom and Jude lingered in bed, truly enjoying and savoring the closeness. Eventually, they agreed to get up and get on with the day, deciding to go on a walk through the trails near the cabin. With water bottles in hand, they ventured out and continued their conversations, talking about nothing and everything through the course of their walk.

Late in the afternoon, they returned to the house. Grabbing some tea, the pair convened in the living room and sank into the well-worn couch. To Tom, the day had been near-perfect. Not all of their topics of conversation were easy, but they were important, and meant progress in their relationship. As they relaxed, Tom noticed Jude's guitar in the corner of the room. "Come up with anything new?"

Tilting her head to the side, Jude looked at her guitar as if it held a song ready to be played. But, shaking her head, she told him, "No. Mostly going over what I've written so far and playing some old stuff. In between the many tears it helped to center me."

Tommy was again reminded of how much he hurt her, and wished for nothing more than to make it all go away. "Jude, I..."

"Tommy, I didn't say it to make you feel bad...it's just how it is." Putting a hand on his knee, she looked at him before continuing. "The pain and hurt that we've gone through will always be a part of our history. Yes, it sucks. Yes, it was complete hell. But, the good news is that we're together now. We'll take it one day at a time."

"I know. But..."

"Babe, life happens. Do you think you can handle moving forward?"

As much as he wanted to answer her with a resounding "Yes!", Tommy didn't know if could say so truthfully. He felt a lot of guilt for the years of pain he put Jude through. Since coming to the cabin not 24 hours prior, there had been more times than he could count where the guilt started to overwhelm him. "I'll try" was the only answer he could give her.

The rest of the afternoon went smoothly and was relaxing for both Tom and Jude. With the light quickly fading, the pair cooked a simple dinner and retreated to Jude's room after they finished eating. Simply enjoying the time together, the conversations that characterised their day continued late into the night, creating the foundation of their relationship to be strong and built on honesty. Eventually, well after midnight, Tom suggested they sleep and moved to get out of bed.

"What are you doing?" Jude asked him while putting her hand on his arm.

Turning towards her, he furrowed his brow before explaining, "well, we decided to take things slow and I don't want to pressure you."

"Can you handle sleeping together again, even if nothing happens?" She paused briefly before continuing. "I don't want to be alone tonight...not because I'm scared you'll leave, I just like having you close."

The smile that lit his face was instantaneous, and Tom readily agreed. Gently placing a hand on her cheek, he kissed her forehead before fully getting out of bed. Let me grab my stuff and I'll be right back. I would love nothing more than to stay the night with you."

Before she could say another word, he nearly sprinted to the guest room where his bag was located. Changing quickly, he gathered his things before bringing them back to Jude's room. "I love you," he told her after climbing back into bed and securing an arm behind her, wrapping her in his embrace.

Giving him a simple peck, she cuddled into his arms. "I love you too, Babe."

They laid together for a few minutes in silence, enjoying the peace and quiet of the night surrounding them. Tommy knew that he could easily get used to this - falling asleep next to his girl was perfect. There weren't many things that would bring a sense of contentment like being with Jude, confident in where their relationship was heading.

…

It was nearly eleven the following morning when Jude and Tom woke up. Though both still tired, they knew that it was important to head back to Toronto. After a quick breakfast, Tom helped Jude clean up the cabin before they left for home. Though the drive only took a few hours, Tom told Jude it was necessary to stop along the way for some coffee. Initially, Jude was confused, but the tight embrace she found herself in after opening her car door made the stop worth it.

Thankfully, a quick stop at Tim Hortons and they were on their way. The remaining drive taking only an hour due to their hurried pace. Once in the city, Jude followed Tom to his apartment, staying just long enough for him to shower and change, followed by a long kiss with her backed up against his door.

In the daze that followed Jude to her car, she realized how easily it would be for her to completely let Tommy take over all of her thoughts and her heart. It wasn't new news that she loved him, but the strength of those feelings after being so devastatingly hurt by him was startling. She was surprised when a warm hand covered her own that was still resting on the handle to her car door.

"Let me get it, Babe." In her ear was the low voice of the very man who had invaded her thoughts.

Turning to look up at him she smiled and kissed his cheek. "Thanks."

Moments later they were driving out of the lot, making their way to her loft; only ten minutes later they were in front of her building, parking in Jude's spot towards the back. Tom opened his door immediately and grabbed her bag and guitar from the backseat, leaving only her purse for her to get before following her up the stairs to her door. Once there, Jude unlocked the door and they stepped inside.

"Just leave the guitar there while I throw everything upstairs," she told him as she started towards her room.

"Take your time, Hon. I'm gonna chill on the couch."

His voice followed her into her room, and Jude couldn't help but smile. She knew that he was perfectly comfortable in her loft and would have no problem relaxing on her couch while she got ready. Quickly, she changed into some clean clothes, ran a brush through her hair, and raced back down the stairs.

Seeing his eyes closed and head on the back of the couch, Jude snuck up behind him and kissed his lips, surprised when he began to kiss her back. Moments later, they separated, a content smile lighting both their faces. "Mmm...that was nice."

Standing up, Tommy took her hand. "Yes it was." Meeting her by the door, he kissed her forehead, then rested his against her own. "But, as much as I would love to continue doing that, we should probably get to the studio."

Smiling, Jude nodded her head, knowing that they both had work to do. She would much rather hold the real world at bay a bit longer, but acknowledged that it wasn't a possibility. She had agreed to help Spied with some lyrics, and they were both due to record Micah that evening. Wanting to hold onto the moment, Jude clasped Tommy's hand in her own and lingered by the door.

"Babe..."

"I know, I know." Reaching up so that her lips met his for a brief moment, Jude then stepped back. "We have to get going. Wanna grab some takeout on the way over? We haven't had lunch and it's already past three."

"Sounds great. Do you need to bring anything else with you?"

"No, I'll be helping Spied until Micah comes in. Let's just get going."

"Sounds good." Holding the door open for her, he nodded his head. "After you, milady."

Lightly slapping his chest, Jude shook her head, "You goof."

Together, they made their way downstairs hand in hand. Before going to the studio, they stopped at an Indian restaurant a few blocks away from her place. Orders in hand, they continued on their way, arriving at G Major shortly thereafter. After a heated lingering kiss, they parted and went separate ways, Tommy to his office, and Jude to the studio where she could see SME playing.

"Dude! You're back!" The voice of her guitarist and best friend greeted her as she walked through the door, and the smile on face grew larger.

"Hey, Spied. How are ya?"

"Nope," he told her, shaking his head. "You're not getting off that easy. What happened? I saw you and Squinty walk in together..."

The open-ended question caused Jude to roll her eyes. She knew he wouldn't let her not tell him what had happened over the past couple of days. Motioning for him to join her as she sat on the couch, Jude caught his attention by looking him directly in the eye. "I'll give you the condensed version, 'kay?"

"Sounds good," he agreed, taking a place next to her.

"I guess I'll start by saying that I know it was you who told him where I was. Part of me wanted to hit you when he showed up, but the other part of me was grateful." From there, she explained a brief version of her conversation with Tommy the night he arrived at the cabin. Continuing on to the next day he was there, she shared some of their struggle in getting their relationship started and back on track. Though she wasn't giving explicit detail as to what had happened, she was thankful for a friend like Spied who knew how to read between the lines of what she was saying.

Twenty minutes later, the story was complete and Spied's arms were around Jude. "Wow," was his only response.

"I know."

"So, where does that leave you now?"

As if waiting for the question to be asked, the door to the studio opened at that minute to reveal Tommy, smile on his face and paperwork in hand. "Babe?"

"Hey." Her response wasn't verbose, but the look in her eyes revealed her joy at seeing him. "Just catching up with Spied."

"No problem." He stepped farther into the room, coming to a stop directly in front of her. "I just talked to Micah and he'll be here in about an hour. Does that work for you guys? I know it doesn't give you much time to work on lyrics..."

Glancing at Spied, Jude knew that it wouldn't be a problem and told Tommy as much. "That should be fine. I don't think we were going to get very far anyways."

Chuckling, Tom raised his eyebrows before responding. "I figured as much." Turning to Spied, he stuck out his hand. "Thanks for everything, Spied. I really owe you."

With no hesitation, Spied took his hand and gave it a firm shake. He offered no words, but simply nodded his head.

The sight of two of her favorite people coming to some mutual agreement caused Jude's breath to catch in her throat. In the past, the pair had never seen eye to eye, but seeing the handshake and unspoken communication, she was overwhelmed. She would be foolish not to realize that she was the reason for them coming together. Still, it was overwhelming to know that their understanding was out of love for her.

The handshake and staring contest broke off quickly, and Tom bent down to place his lips on Jude's forehead. "I'll see you soon, sweetheart." Turning, he walked out of the room, but didn't leave before looking her directly in the eye. "Love you."

The combination of those words and the look in his eye melted Jude to a pile of mush. Her mind was quickly transporting her back to the cabin where it was just the two of them. Amidst the champagne, strawberries, and romantic music of her daydream, the sound of Spied's voice began to break through.

"Earth to Dude..."

Grabbing the hand waving in front of her face, a sheepish expression covered Jude's face. "Sorry, Spied."

Eyebrows raised and lips curled into a smirk, Spied took his hand back. "Your boyfriend's been gone for five minutes...think you can join me in the present again?"

She was about to respond when something he said caused her to pause. "Boyfriend?"

"What do you mean? You are dating Quincy, right?"

"I guess." Thinking back over their time at the cabin, Jude realized that they had never really had _that _conversation. "We never really talked about it. I mean, we're dating, so I kind of assume that means I'm his girlfriend...we love each other and all..."

"I wouldn't doubt for a second that Tom considers you his girlfriend. Honestly, he probably considers you more than that." Without offering further explanation, Spied stood and walked over to his guitar. "Let me show you what we have so far."

It was clear that he was going to try and make the remainder of their time together productive. Attempting to focus her attention on the music he was playing and the intricacies of the song, Jude knew that she would have to talk to Tommy soon. Despite Spied's assurances that Tommy considered her his girlfriend, she wanted to make sure.


	20. Chapter 20

I didn't really edit this chapter well, but I'll be going over it tomorrow. Enjoy:)

Chapter 20****

The clock was nearing midnight by the time Jude was laying in bed. After listening to some of Spied's new material for SME, Micah had arrived and it was time for her to put on her "producer hat." Though it had only been a couple of days, she enjoyed getting back to working with Micah, enjoying the unique style he put into his music. The three of them worked for hours, finally calling it a night around ten. Not surprisingly, Jude had been near starving at that point, and Tommy decided they should grab some food before heading home. Grabbing sandwiches from the all-night deli around the corner from G Major, they talked for another hour about the studio and what work they would have the following day.****

Jude had thought about bringing up the "boyfriend" question, but it quickly slipped her mind as they walked back to her car which was still parked at the studio. As she dropped him off in front of his building, Tommy asked, "I'll pick you up tomorrow?"****

She had found it completely endearing the way he was almost shy to ask. Shouldn't he know by now that she would spend every free minute she could with him?****

That was the very reason she was still awake. Only two nights that he had been by her side and she was ruined. It didn't feel right that he wasn't next to her now, but Jude wasn't sure what she should do about it. She had dropped him off almost forty-five minutes prior, giving her reason to think that he would likely be asleep. She didn't want to call and wake him, but after only thirty minutes of laying here, she knew it would be hell trying to sleep at this point.****

Closing her eyes, she tried to imagine that she was wrapped in his arms, cuddled close against him. Trying to trick herself into thinking he was there was her only hope at a good night's sleep.****

Ten minutes passed and she was no closer to rest than before. Just as she was about to get up and grab a cup of tea, her phone rang. Curious as to who would be calling past midnight, she glanced at the screen. But seeing Tommy's name, she didn't know whether to be thankful that he was calling or worried that something was wrong. Tapping the screen to connect them, she asked, "Babe?"

"You weren't asleep, were you?"****

His voice was a little scratchy from the late hour. At least, Jude hoped it was from the late hour. "No. I was actually just about to get up since I wasn't having any luck. Are you okay?"****

**"**I'm fine. I couldn't sleep either."****

There was silence on Tommy's end of the phone, but Jude sensed that he had more to say.****

**"**I missed you," he told her, voice lower that normal. "We only slept together for two nights and I already miss it. Does that make me crazy?"****

**"**No!' She nearly yelled it over the phone in her exuberance. "I missed you too...that's why I couldn't sleep. You've ruined me, Quincy." She could hear a laugh escape his mouth and smiled at the picture it brought to mind.****

**"**Well, girl, I take full responsibility. Can I come over?"****

**"**Please do...and hurry. I'm tired and I miss you."****

**"**Me too, Babe. Me too. I'll see you soon."****

Smiling, Jude laid back down for a few minutes before deciding to go downstairs so that he wouldn't have to wait long for her to open the door. Hearing a knock on the door, she looked at the clock to see that even ten minutes hadn't passed since she hung up the phone. Opening the door, she was surprised to see Tommy standing in flannel pajamas and a t-shirt, his guitar and a duffel bag sitting next to him and a backpack on his back.****

She let out a yelp as he grabbed her up, lifting her off the ground and spinning her before setting her down and nestling his head in her hair. He squeezed her before releasing her, moving to grab his things in order to bring them inside and close the door.****

**"**That took less time than I figured it would."****

Shrugging his shoulders, Tommy looked at the ground before telling her, "I was pulling out of my apartment complex when I called. I figured that if you weren't asleep and wanted me over, it would take less time. If you were asleep and didn't answer, I would have just turned around." Looking up, he asked, "Is that okay?"****

Wrapping her arms around him, Jude reveled in his unique scent and was warmed from the inside out. "I'm glad you were here so fast." Kissing his lips softly and languorously, she tried to convey how glad she was that he was with her. "Let's get some sleep."****

The pair made their way up the steps to her room, Tommy trailing after her while holding her hand. Within thirty seconds, they were settled under the covers, curled together and finally relaxed.****

**"**I love you, Babe."****

Smiling, Jude could only tell him, "I love you, too," before falling asleep.**  
><strong>**…******

The following morning, the scent of coffee coerced Jude into consciousness. Glancing at the clock before sitting up, she realized it was almost nine, perfect timing for her to get ready for the day and still be at work on time. Noticing the hot cup of coffee sitting next to her, Jude sat up and grabbed it, savoring the taste and effect it had on her. ****

The abrupt sound of water turning off surprised her. Though she hadn't even realized the shower had been on, Jude smiled to herself knowing that it was Tommy. She loved that he felt comfortable enough in her loft to shower and get ready. It was something simple, but it made her happy. ****

Seeing him come into her room with only a pair of jeans on, Jude couldn't help the sigh that escaped her lips. He looked delicious. Despite her hesitancy in rushing into their relationship, it was hard to ignore how her pulse raced when he came within ten yards of her, let alone without a shirt.****

**"**Hey, Sweetheart." Coming around to her side of the bed, he leaned down to kiss her forehead before moving to the other side of the room and grabbing the shirt that was on the corner of the bed. ****

As he stretched it over his well-defined form, Jude couldn't help but stare. Eyes glued to his chest, a low "Mmm..." was her only response.****

Shirt on, Tommy grinned at her, seemingly knowing that her thoughts were less than innocent. "What's the plan for today, Babe?"****

**"**Oh...uh..." Stuttering, Jude shook her head to clear her thoughts. "Well, we've got Micah this morning, and then I was thinking we could work on my album. Does that work for you?"****

**"**Sounds great. No working with Spied and the boys today?"****

**"**No..." Jude responded. "He showed me some of the music he was working on yesterday, so I have an idea for the feel they want. I'm gonna work on some lyrics over the next couple of days before we get together again."****

**"**Sounds good." Coming over to her side of the bed again, he crouched down so that they were at the same eye level. "Wanna get ready and we can grab some pastries before we meet Micah?"****

The idea of warm and flaky pastries caused another groan to escape. "Yes please," she told him, eyes closed still lost in her daydream of a delicious breakfast. She heard him chuckle before getting up. ****

Reluctantly, she opened her eyes and climbed out of bed, setting her now-empty coffee cup on the nightstand. "Give me a few minutes to shower and get ready and we'll get going."****

Smiling back at her, Tommy nodded in agreement. "I'll be downstairs. See you soon, Babe."****

**"**M'kay." As she went about getting ready for the day, Jude recalled her conversation with Spied the day prior. She made a mental note to reminder herself to talk to Tommy about the whole "boyfriend" question. She didn't want the question and curiosity fester, but she wasn't entirely sure how to bring it up either. As she walked down the stairs only forty minutes after getting out of bed, she decided to wait and hope that the opportunity would arise.**  
><strong>**…******

The day seemed to fly by between working with Micah and recording for Jude's album. Before she knew it, she and Tommy were sitting on the floor of their studio surrounded by take-out containers and crumpled pieces of paper. They had barely taken a break all day, only pausing that evening to pay the delivery boy. Well, that and a minor make-out session earlier in the day after they had finished working with Micah.****

Smiling, Jude recalled how she had meant to grab a quick kiss on her way to get her guitar from his office. But, he had followed her into his office, closed the door, and attacked her lips with his own. It was only when they were gasping for breath fifteen minutes later that they separated and got back to work.****

Now, with the clock nearing eleven, she was ready to be done for the day. Looking over at Tommy, her smile grew wider at the sight of him with his head against the wall and his eyes closed. But, as if he could sense that her attention was on him, he opened his eyes and looked at her.****

**"**Are we done for the day, Babe?"****

**"**Yes...I don't think I can handle any longer."****

**"**I know." After collecting some of their trash into the garbage can under the sound board he stood. Offering her a hand, he told her "Let's go home."****

A sigh of relief escaped as she stood. She kept her hand in his as they made their way out of the studio and through the back door. ****

A short while later they were entering the front door of her loft, dropping their belongings by the door before heading upstairs. They were already in bed before Jude realized that Tommy was laying next to her and they hadn't even discussed him going home. Turning to face him, she asked, "Is it okay that you're here?"****

**"**Where else would I be?" he asked her.****

**"**You don't mind not going home?" She was thrilled, but wanted to make sure he was fine with the arrangement.****

**"**Babe, why do you think I brought a huge bag full of stuff with me last night?" When she didn't answer, he continued, "I love being able to come home with you."****

**"**I love it, too" Jude couldn't think of another way to respond, and simply snuggled into his embrace. Thinking back over the day, she realized that she still hadn't asked Tommy about the status of their relationship. Comments like the one he just said made her not care, but she knew that her curiosity would get the better of her eventually. Not sure how to phrase things, she simply asked, "Babe, what do you think we are?"****

Though she couldn't see his face, she could sense his confusion. In her mind, she could see his forehead furrowed and raised eyebrows. Before he could ask, she clarified, "I guess...I mean, are we dating?"****

The laugh that escaped him jolted her slightly from her place in his arms and securely against his chest.****

**"**Jude..." Pulling away from her, he looked into her eyes. He seemed to realize that she was serious in her question and quickly pulled her back into his chest. "Sweetheart, I love you." He kissed the top of her head and let his lips linger there before continuing. "You are my world..." Again, he kissed the top of her head. "I guess we're dating, but to be honest, you mean more to me than that...I mean, I guess you're my girlfriend, but that makes it seem so trivial."****

Nuzzling into his embrace even further, Jude kissed his throat just below his Adam's apple. "I love you," she whispered. They had talked things through at the farm house, but his explanation took her breath away. How had she ended up so lucky as to be with him?****

He whispered, "I love you," before kissing the top of her head one last time. He shifted their bodies so that they were a bit more spread out, but making sure they were connected as much as possible. Jude knew that no more words were necessary, and no explanation from Tommy was needed to make her feel secure in their relationship.**  
><strong>**…******

The rest of the week seemed to race past, and Jude was grateful for a day off. She desperately needed to do laundry, and Tommy needed to get more clothes, so they agreed to spend the day catching up on the necessary, if not mundane, chores. ****

At the laundromat, Jude was in the middle of folding the second-to-last load when Tommy's assigned ringtone on her phone started loudly. "Hey, Babe," she answered quickly. "I'm just about done with the clothes."****

**"**Awesome."****

He sounded distracted, but Jude attempted to continue folding their clothes and didn't think much of it. When he didn't say anything for a few more minutes, she asked, "What's going on, Tom?"****

There was another pause before he spoke that had Jude wondering what he was thinking about. ****

**"**Well, I was trying to pack some more of my stuff and was trying to decide which jacket I should bring - it's going to be a bit cooler this week. I was going to bring my leather jacket, but then I thought I should bring that blazer I have in case we go somewhere nice."****

**"**So bring them both..." She could tell that he was hesitating for some reason, but wasn't sure why the decision about which jacket to bring would cause him concern. ****

**"**I was going to, but then I thought that I should bring the pants that go with the blazer because D has that meeting scheduled for next week with the investors."****

**"**Right..."****

**"**Since I remembered we had the meeting, I figured I should bring a shirt to go with the suit, and that meant bringing a tie too - you know how D makes us look professional for those meetings. But, I couldn't decide which tie to bring."****

**"**Babe, I don't really know what the problem is. Do you not want to come over?"****

**"**No!" His response was instantaneous, causing a small smile to highlight Jude's features. "It's just...I started pulling out everything I wanted to bring over and I realized that there wasn't much left."****

**"**So bring it all." Still unsure of his hesitation, Jude was starting to get a bit frustrated. If Tommy was having second thoughts about staying with her, she wanted him to be honest. Before her mind could go too far, his voice on the other end of her phone interrupted her thoughts.****

**"**That's kind of what I was thinking. What if I brought it all...clothes, guitars, records..." He left the question open-ended for a moment. "Would it be okay if I brought everything?"****

Relieved, Jude exclaimed, "Of course, Babe! We'll make some room and I can rearrange my closet and stuff. Why were you so bent out of shape?"****

**"**Honestly?" ****

He seemed nervous to answer, but Jude wanted to know. "Yes. Why were you being so weird?"****

**"**I guess it's because...well...I mean, Jude, I'm basically moving in with you. We've officially been together for about a week-and-a-half, and we're going to be living together."****

She hadn't fully realized the implications of him bringing all of his thing to her loft, but the knowledge of what it meant for their relationship didn't scare her in the least. If she was being honest with herself, she was excited. "Tommy, some people might think it's too soon, but who the hell cares? It's not like I can sleep without you anymore, so why not make it official. Besides, now I have an excuse to get you to help me clean once in a while." She was smiling, excited at the prospect of them "shacking up," as Sadie would say.****

**"**So, if I gave up the lease on my apartment, you wouldn't be completely freaked out?"****

**"**Maybe I should be, but no." Taking a brief moment to ensure that there was no hint of doubt in her mind, she concluded that there wasn't. "Honestly, I'm kind of stoked."****

**"**Good, me too." She could hear him take a deep breath, as if in relief that she had agreed. "How long until the laundry is done?"****

Checking the display on the last load in the dryer, she told him, "Maybe 20 minutes or so. How long until you're packed up?"****

**"**I'm done. I just have to load the car."****

**"**Perfect. As soon as I'm done I'll be home and can help you unload."****

**"**Sounds great, Babe. I love you."****

Unable to resist the smile that lit her face, she told him, "I love you, too. See you soon." Hanging up the phone, she quickly dialed her sister and tried to speed through the rest of the folding. When Sadie answered, Jude immediately launched into the story of how she and Tommy were going to live together.****

There was a brief pause from her sister's end of the phone. "Are you sure?"****

Loving how Sadie was first and foremost always concerned for Jude, she smiled. "Sades, I've never felt more confident of anything in my life. Everything feels right. I'm not scared of being honest with him like I was before he left. He's been so open with me over the past few months - even with our misunderstandings. We need to work on our communication, but we both know that."****

**"**I get that, Jude. But being in a relationship is one thing...living together is totally different. Are you really ready for that?"****

**"**I can't sleep without him, Sades."****

**"**But Jude, you guys can have sex anywhere...why do you need to live together for that?"****

**"**Sadie, I didn't mean sex. I literally mean that I can't sleep without him next to me. We haven't done..._that_...yet."****

**"**Really?" The surprise in her voice was obvious.****

**"**Yeah. We've been working through stuff and it didn't feel...right." There was a part of Jude that couldn't believe that she hadn't slept with Tommy, but what she told Sadie was true. She hadn't been ready for that quite yet. But, she loved him, and, considering it now, thought she might be ready.****

**"**Wow..." Seeming genuinely shocked, Sadie was quiet for a moment. "You mean to tell me that you are dating and shaking up with Tom Quincy, infamous bad-boy boy-bander extraordinaire, and you haven't had sex?"****

**"**We've only been dating a little over a week! I'm not that easy, Sadie." Jude was a little chagrined that her sister thought she would sleep with someone so quickly. On the other hand, it was Tommy, the guy she had been hung up on for years.****

**"**I know, Jude. But it's Tommy..."****

**"**Yeah..." Lost in thoughts of the near-perfect man that would be waiting for her at home, Jude failed to hear what Sadie was saying. "What, sis?"****

A chuckle came across the line. "Clearly your thoughts are elsewhere, but know that I'm excited for you."****

**"**Thanks." Having the support of her sister wasn't necessary, but it was nice. For too long, Sadie and Jude hadn't been close and fought often. But knowing that her sister was on her side felt good. "We'll talk soon, yeah?"****

**"**Sounds good. Talk to ya later, sis."****

Hanging up her phone, Jude got back to the laundry sitting in front of her and hastily folded everything up. The obnoxious beeping signaled the end of the final load that was in the dryer. Quickly, she grabbed the folded clothes and took them to her car before returning to the laundromat and retrieving the final load. ****

Not five minutes later she was on her way to the loft, more than ready to see Tommy. Throwing open the door upon getting up the stairs, Jude couldn't help but laugh at the state of chaos in which she found the loft. Empty boxes had accumulated near the door. Guitars, amps, and a keyboard were stacked and piled by the studio. A dozen or so large mugs were scattered on her counter by the sink, and a duffel bag of clothes made it halfway up the stairs.****

**"**Babe?" she called, figuring he would be in their room.****

**"**Damn!" Tommy's head appeared in the door opening at the top of the stairs and Jude could see his shoulder shrug somewhat sheepishly. "I thought you would be a bit longer...I thought I would be further along than this."****

Jude looked at her watch to see if she had been incredibly fast at getting home. "Its been a little over twenty minutes. Isn't that what we agreed on?"****

**"**Yeah, but I figured you would call Sadie, and I thought that conversation would last longer."****

Her grin was instantaneous. "Well, I did call Sadie, but it only took a few minutes. And as for the loft...no worries. Come help me bring the laundry upstairs and I'll help you unload and unpack."****

He smiled at her in a way that made her toes curl and her insides warm. "Do you have more in the car?"****

**"**Just the basket from the last load."****

**"**I'll get that and you order us some food...I'm gonna need sustenance. I hear that Ethiopian place delivers...wanna try that?"****

**"**Perfect. I'll call them right now."****

Hours later, Tommy's things were completely unpacked and the pair were sprawled out on the couch. A movie was playing on the TV, but neither were paying attention to it. ****

**"**I've been thinking..."****

When he didn't continue, Jude's curiosity was peaked and she prompted Tommy, "...about..."****

**"**Your birthday."****

Again, he didn't elaborate. "What about my birthday?"****

**"**What do you want to do?"****

After contemplating for a moment, she asked, "Is it weird that I haven't thought about it?"****

A burst of laughter escaped him as he pulled her closer to him. "A little, but I still love you." He leaned down and kissed her, sweet and gentle. "Do you want something big or small?"****

Considering both options, was quiet for a few moments. "Probably something smaller...things are going to get crazy when we start publicizing for Micah, not to mention when we start shows and stuff for my album." Thinking of things to come, Jude sighed, knowing that in a short time, they would be very busy. "Is that okay?"****

**"**Babe, it's your birthday, we can do whatever you want."****

Smiling, she looked up at him. "Then, yeah. Let's do something smaller. Maybe Spied and the guys, Sadie and Kwest, Chuck and the band, Celeste...that sounds good."****

**"**That does sound good." He kissed her again and asked, "What do you want to do? Dinner, go out, dancing...any thoughts?"****

**"**Dinner could be good...maybe get drinks or something...I'm not sure yet."****

**"**We don't have to figure it out right away, but think about, okay?"****

**"**Will do." Standing, she offered and hand to Tom and helped him to his feet. "Now, what do you say we go to bed?"****

Rather than give her a verbal response, he leaned down and kissed her. With his arms wrapped around her and lips attached to hers, Tommy led her to the bottom of the stairs, only releasing her so they could get to her room without too much difficulty. ****

After getting ready to sleep, a quiet "I love you" passed between the pair before they drifted off. **  
><strong>**…******

Tommy revved the engine on his Viper as he raced out of the Studio parking lot. After moving his things into Jude's place the day before and spending the entire morning with her in the studio, he was amazed that he was able to escape without her knowledge. She was currently occupied with Spied, going over some lyrics for the music he had put together with the boys. ****

Driving through the city took over a half an hour, much longer than he anticipated due to a closed road that caused major traffic. Because of the delays, his time was limited, and Tommy knew that he would have to hurry. ****

Finally pulling up to the warehouse near the Alderwood development, Tom pulled his car into the building so as not to draw attention. While he didn't think any paparazzi had followed, it was a realistic concern and he wanted to make sure no pictures of his transaction were leaked to the press.****

Walking through the warehouse to the back office, he greeted his longtime friend with a simple nod. "Do you have what we talked about?"****

Laughing, the man shook his head. "Always the same with you, right Tom? No wasting time, just want to get down to business?"****

**"**Sorry, man." He shook the other man's hand before sitting down in the chair across the desk. "The drive over took longer than expected, and I have to get back to the studio before anyone notices I'm gone."****

**"**I see." Pulling out a case from the locked bottom drawer of his desk, the other man opened it in front of Tom before asking, "What do you think?"****

One at a time, Tom picked up each of the three objects in front of him, turning them over in his hands and examining each side before looking up at his friend. "Really?" At the lack of a reaction from his friend, Tommy continued. "I told you that money is no object and that I wanted the best of the best...something to get the job done." Gesturing to the items on the desk, he asked, "This is what you bring me?"****

**"**Now, Tom, there's no need to get heated up. I found these and thought they were nice, but don't worry. I know you and I have just the thing."****

**"**You better not be fucking with me," Tommy told the man. "I came to you because I knew you could be discreet and that you had the best selection."****

**"**And that's still true." Turning, the man moved a picture on the wall behind his desk to reveal a safe. After he entered the code and scanned his fingerprint, the door to the safe opened. Pulling out a smaller box, he turned to face Tom. "Now, I think this is perfect...incredibly rare. I found it just after I received your call a last week and it was delivered from out of the country just yesterday. It even has official papers and everything." ****

Taking the box from him, Tommy opened it to reveal exactly what he wanted. "You're right, it is perfect." Taking a moment to contemplate exactly what it meant to be holding the item in his hand - the major implications it would have. But, realizing he didn't have much time, he put down the box and pulled out his wallet. "How much do I owe you?"****

Filling out the check for the agreed upon price, Tommy sat back completely satisfied. Standing, he shook the other man's hand and took the box with him. "Thanks...I really appreciate this." Without waiting for a response, he walked out the door and back to his car. ****

Rushing through the streets of Toronto, he arrived at the studio just under twenty minutes later. With the box stashed in his glove compartment, Tom quickly got out and headed back into the studio, Jude none the wiser.


End file.
